How quickly we forget the dangerous crow boy who’s job it is to destroy plastic
$LAYYYTER
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we're not kids anymore.
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祝日 / Permanent Vacation
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
h

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How quickly we forget the dangerous crow boy who’s job it is to destroy plastic

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you dont have to be a parent to understand the horror of walking into a room to discover that the baby crawled out of his crib and onto that pottery wheel you forgot to turn off, and while the baby is spinning around and around, the dog is sitting there all calm, like a person, gently using his paws to fashion the babys soft cartilage head into something a little more modern. it might be the classic tale of bad parenting, but lets see where the dog is going with this
This post is from 2013. It has less than 100 notes. Together we can revive this work of art that tragically ahead of its time. We’re ready for it now
i love how weird kids are. they make up the most bizarre stuff when left to their own devices and it's never what an adult would naively predict a kid would do in their imaginative play
my friend's 5 year old recently got a toy veterinary medicine set - it's super cool, like one of those mini play kitchens a lot of kids have, but it's set up to pretend to be a vet (it's this thing) - it has stuffed animals and things to weigh them, give them medicine, take x-rays, write on their charts, etc.
so this kid, who is five and to my knowledge has no experience in the administrative bureaucracy of modern healthcare, puts a stuffed pig named Piggy on the exam table. she pretends to draw blood from Piggy using a fake syringe, and the blood goes into a toy test tube vial that she calls "the resulter"
i'm playing with her, right, so i'm like, awesome, what are the results of Piggy's blood test? and she says "we have to send it to the scientists." so we send the vial to the scientists (put it in her bedroom) and when we get back to the vet playset i'm like awesome what did the scientists say? and she says they have not gotten back to us yet
so she rolls her eyes, exasperated, and says we have to call the scientists. she pretends to call them. apparently, they tell her that Piggy's blood test is "at the bottom of the list" and "we have to WAIT." she frowns. we wait a bit longer and call them back. they tell us it will be a while! she says we should go ask the scientists in person so we go back to her bedroom and she inquires at this imaginary lab, at which point the scientists yell at her and tell her now they will make us wait even longer!
keep in mind she is 100% directing this play. she is making all this up. she is fully in control of this game, and she has decided that what we are going to pretend is that we are dealing with this exhausting nonsense, not actually treating Piggy.
finally the blood tests come back. they are inconclusive. the scientists do not know what is wrong with Piggy. the little girl walks back to the stuffed pig on the exam table, sighs deeply, and says in a very serious voice "we can never help you."
i'm obsessed with this kid. when given complete control over a make believe scenario, instead of becoming the heroic rescuer administering effective cures, she is instead a beleaguered vet making multiple calls to an overworked lab only to be left unable to help her patient.
10/10 no notes. kids are amazing
tuck him in Tuesday
tuck him in Tuesday once again
another tuck him in Tuesday is here
Tuck him out 😈
WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM
The world could be so beautiful

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If you have a UK address there is a gov.uk petition at the moment for an investigation into the effects of Section 28.
Section 28 banned the mention of or "promotion" of being gay within schools and ushered in decades of silence and violence in this country. Its impact is currently unrecorded, but keenly felt. With the UK currently banning the discussion of being transgender in schools, libraries and other public spaces, along with the bathrooms guidance, we run a risk of repetition. We need statistics on what Section 28 did to two generations of queer people.
Please sign if you can, it needs 100,000 signatures to be considered. Non-UK residents please reblog.
We call on the Government to launch a public inquiry into the impact of Section 28 of the Local Government Act (1988) which specified that L
saying something you know will make people laugh. And they do laugh.
i love when people on the internet get denied stuff and you find the most innovative minds of the generation dedicated to making goddamn sure other people get what they want come hell or high water
Okay but I get this. All of you worms who have things blocked on your wifi or whatever and have IbisPaint this is how you do it
Open IbisPaint go to a canvas (any canvas, or make. a new one)
Select the font tool (if you don’t know what or where that is, press the tool icon (normally a paint brush or eraser) and press the T button
From there you should be able to create a text box (writing is not important…). Find the font button and add a new font. I can’t remember what it’s called but you’ll know when you see it
It’ll automatically search for you “free fonts.” Do not follow this. Your app is misdirecting you. Instead search up whatever it is you’re looking for in the search bar, and that should work
Knowledge should not be trapped behind bars, bend and break them until you can grasp it
Taskmaster Ask Game!
Favourite series?
Greg or Alex?
Have you seen every episode?
Favourite quote in the Taskmaster Book of Quotes™?
Favourite task(s)?
What task would you want to attempt yourself?
What task would you love to see another series attempt?
Do you follow any international versions?
Did you participate in home tasking?
If you could pick any 5 old contestants to come back for a special, who would they be?
Dream contestants for the future?
Do you listen to the official Taskmaster podcast? What about any adjacent podcasts?
What has been your favourite location apart from the house?
What is your favorite part about the Taskmaster house?
Any unpopular opinions?
Favourite contestant(s)?
Critique your favourite series and compliment your least favourite!
Favourite Greg painting/set theme?
When did you discover the show?
Tell me about a TM moment that lives in your head rent-free.

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i need everyone to get into college football right now i am dying to talk about the texas tech situation. this is the kind of thing that will be referenced for the next 100 years. there will be documentaries and biopics about this.
no one asked but here
texas tech's quartback, brendan sorsby, was investigated for sports gambling. i know sports betting is all the rage right now, but athletes themselves are not allowed to do it. it is Rule Number 1 and it is the highest priority rule for the National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA), who governs all athletic programs at about 1,100 colleges in the US.
the invesitagetion of sorsby revealed that, not only did he place more than 9,000 sports bets when he himself was a collegiate athlete, but 40 of those bets were AGAINST HIS OWN TEAM when he was playing at indiana university. immediately, this threatens the integrity of the sport, and especially because indiana is the hottest team right now as the defending national champion.
the NCAA, which is largely a sham organization these days (they've truly lost their grasp and college athletics are the wild west now) actually enforced their Number 1 Rule and told sorsby his career is over, that he would never play college football again (and, subsequently, that he would never get drafted into the NFL because his college career was cut short).
well, because the NCAA is a husk of its former self, sorsby and texad tech immediately took this to court. MANY athletes have learned these past few seasons that if you can find a judge who's a fan of your team, you can get any NCAA ruling overturned. that's exactly what texas tech did. they filed a suit in Lubbock, where the university is located and where every judge is an alum of texas tech. so sorsby was granted an injunction and will now only be suspended for the first 2 games od the 2026 season (which are alwayd against no-name teams that will be destroyed regardless of who's suspended).
every other school in the country immediately went on the defensive because this is a very clear integretiy issue. so nebraska and georgia (sic em dawgs) released statements saying that all currently-scheduled competitions witb Texas Tech in ANY sport will be canceled and there will be no future schedulings. at least 3 of the major conferences (SEC, Big 10, Big 12) , who account for almost all division 1 sports teams in the country, are also in discussions about cancelling comtests. Texas Tech is part of the Big 12, and there is serious talk of all other teams in the conference shutting texas tech out.
now would probably be time where i say that texas tech is one of the wealthiest programs in college football becaise there is a single billionaire alumnus pouring money into the program with hopes of essentially buying a championship. so texas techs integrity has always been questionable. anyway, the university president put oit a statement that he doesnt care that sorseby violated regulation and that texas tech will sue any school that refuses to play them because it jeopardizes their championship prospects if they're umable to play any games.
this is all just startomg but its so juicy and delicious. the NCAA is going to crumble to dust if they cannot get this injunction overturned. schools like georgia and nebraska have plenty of money so a suit isnt necessarily a concern, but this will absolutely change college football forever. i cant stop reading about it.
update on this: texas tech is claiming that every school who has/is considering cancelling all contests is "afraid" that texas tech is better than them. what's funny about this is that sorsby's stats are average. he is not good enough for this kind of protection. many schools who have already cancelled or are considering it have much better quarterbacks than sorsby. also, texas tech's head coach had said that it's actually ok that sorsby bet against his own team because it "its not murder or assault."
the attorney general of texas has threatened to investigate the Big 12 conference if they sanction Texas Tech
the claim is now that texas texh university just cares so much about brendan sorsbys mental health that they have to sue everyone who calls this an integrity violation. any other school who wouldnt defend an athlete that committed this violation "doesnt care about mental health"
TERRIBLE news, guy williams has noticeable grey hairs in his beard and i am too tired to even pretend to be normal about it
proud victim of the tumblr accent. it's fading out of public consciousness as the tik tok accent takes precedence; a linguistic evolution that makes the tumblr accent 85% funnier to unsuspecting civilians. it's like releasing a disease on a non-inoculated population. coughing baby versus hydrogen bomb.
a very fun ser lyonel, commissioned by @toreadorkable🦌⚔️
imo amy would have been just as excited to meet *anyone* in the first team task as she was to meet kumail, and the reason her excitement gets coupled to joel's genuine starry-eyed adoration is because she's that very awesome kind of person who enters a room, feels out the energy, and mirrors it back out to people
she's not excited because kumail is so famous, she's excited that kumail is so famous because joel is excited that kumail is so famous
this is presumably why everyone who knows amy gledhill seemingly adores her, and also why joel x kumail is a true and beautiful bromance that doesn't take anything away from anyone by excluding amy a li'l bit

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I’ve had tumblr for 4 years but some of you bitches have had it for a decade. It’s time to seek penance
wait I’m curious now . Reblog this with how long u’ve been on tumblr for. Dating back to ur oldest blog ever !!!
Greg 'Stationery Connoisseur' Davies