Unown Enthusiast

Links under the cut!

Shou sleeping outside in the trash can like a stray cat in that one episode cracks me up but HEAR ME OUT. Kenzan waking up early to go for a jog or something and finding him :3

No one will find the picture in your attic.

It's not your fault the person made of cadavers you sew together and you revived killed your family.

It's perfectly normal to enter your house climbing like a lizard.

The fact that you killed a man doesn't make you guilty, it was just your silly alter ego.

That raven who won't stop saying "nevermore" is an asshole, don't listen to it.

Your fiancé is definitely NOT hiding his mad spouse in his attic.

The big ass dog that killed members of your family isn't real, dw.

You deserve revenge for having been abused as a child, go back to moors and show them!

Highlights include:

For your first two years (when you were small) you lived in a foster home with people who raised you into a very polite young man. Two is like you plus me, that's what two is.

Some people adopted you before me and they called you Timmy (which is a stupid name) and they returned your ass almost immediately because you were so annoying at that age.

Like think about how annoying you are right now at seven years old, but way worse.

I'm better than them though, I don't call you Timmy and I wore earplugs to bed for three years because you love to scream at bedtime. Earplugs are like when I roll over and go back to sleep even when you are yelling so so so loud.

I got you at a time in my life when I was really sick (being sick is like when I'm up late because I'm throwing up and you are a very handsome good boy who sits with me) and they had to put me asleep for a procedure. A procedure is like what happened to you when they put you asleep and took your balls away.