FuryWings

WTF Barbie you can’t use a cutting board for a bulletin board

BARBIE! you should know better than to leave a cheese grater on the edge of the fridge! someone could get hurt!

Um, okay, DOES NO ONE REALIZE THAT BARBIE is cleaning her kitchen floor with a garden hose? Get it together, Barbie.

OH MY GOD BARBIE! ARE YOU JUST GOING TO LEAVE THOSE DIRTY DISHES IN YOUR SINK? SERIOUSLY GET IT TOGETHER BARBIE!

CLOSE THE DAMN REFRIGERATOR! YOUR LETTING ALL THGE COLD OUT!

Barbie, seriously? The blender on top of the fridge? You could get hurt!!1

Guys for the love of god how can you not notice the freaking rat next to the fridge?! WTF Barbie? Clean your house more often, would ya?

Barbie, who the hell puts a calculator on their fridge. COME ON! GET WITH THE TIMES!

I love how everyone pretends not to notice the toaster next to the sink. BARBIE! YOU COULD GET ELECTROCUTED IF THAT FELL IN! GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER GURL!

theres a dead body

If the US wins the world cup yall have to start calling it soccer

If the US wins the World Cup it means every other team dropped out

if the US wins the world cup it means the girls are playing

WHAT DID I SAY IN 2014? WHAT DID I SAY. 

nature/vintage

IAN MCKELLEN IS A TREASURE AND WE MUST PROTECT HIM WITH OUR EVERYTHING

There’s this asshole who every time he sees me with my ukulele he thinks he’s funny and asks “Can you play any Metallica?” but the joke is now on him because I just learned how to play the intro riff to Master of Puppets.

I did it. I fucking did it. He asked me again just like I knew he would and I stared him straight in the eyes without blinking and just fucking shredded on my ukulele

nothing bad can happen while ur under a blanket just remember that

I wonder what the most common first impression people have of me is

I feel so proud when friends tell me their parents like me. Like damn right they do, I am a delight.