i mean this forever.

my office is holding a mandatory moonwalk competition at the end of the month and i am remembering why i went off sick for 6 months

public humiliation ritual complete. i did not win.

casual survey: reblog if you want to kiss a girl right now

celebrate women's wins

you solve the mystery of what to have for dinner one night and you think "hell yeah case closed forever" WRONG there is a dinner mystery the next night too

She should be at the club

if i were in charge of star wars i would end the last movie witth yoda reading the story out of a big book and he gives a little chuckle and says "happened, none of that did." and then he gets out of his truck and waddles into walmart

inside your body is PITCH BLACK your cells do all of that in the DARK

self care is swallowing lit matches every 5 minutes so that ur cells can see whatever the fuck they’re doing in there

Ancient scribes detailing horrible events

You probably thought today was a normal Thursday. Nooooope. Big Papa Huge Time actually.

love the phrase "but I digress." yes I temporarily got lost in the moors I wander in my mind but don't worry I'm self-aware about it

Why don’t we let the guy whose every plan could be reasonably construed as an abstract suicide attempt take a crack at it

“Why’d you do that?” Please remember that I am using what I’ve seen in humans to mimic them

sorry for being annoying [remembers that practicing gratitude instead of shame is better for my mental health and my relationships] thank you for letting me be annoying with you