This Is A Crazy Person's Diary

they call it amtrak because the trains am on the trak

job interviewer: would you be willing to destroy and betray yourself for nothing?

job interviewer: (reading the room) would you be willing to destroy and betray yourself for a pizza party?

gotta Google something

ok yeah this is funny

Watching my 60 year old uptight southern white teacher brace herself to say it to a room full of ninth graders is one of those memories that remains crystal clear even years after the fact

image description: a photograph of a black shirt with white text in all caps on it that reads, "Rosencrantz is dead and Guildenstern is dead and me I also feel not so good". / end description

The fossil record we're leaving behind from the anthropocene is gonna be so fucked

Digging up the UK in future millennia: temperate rainforest....glaciers.. temperate rainforest.. sudden disappearance of all trees. all megafauna gone. one billion sheep bones. asiatic deer. parrots. occasional macropod. giant redwoods. coati. hawaiian goose.

Reverse Air Bud movie about a human basketball player who, on a technicality, enters and wins the westminster dog show

starting the countdown until gaylors start saying that Adam Sandler officiating Taylor's wedding (sorry if this is how you found out) is actually proof that it's a sham because it's a reference to I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry (2007), in which Sandler and Kevin James play heterosexual men who enter a mutually beneficial fake gay marriage, a dynamic that Taylor is inverting as a queer woman pretending to be straight while cleverly flagging the obvious farce to those with the eyes to see

this is worst than finding out from a castiel meme

controversial stance but i do wish i could live forever. i certainly live like i'm going to live forever. i take my time. realistically however my lifespan is dreadfully limited and there are things i've "been meaning to do" that i will never get around to. the Emoji Movie came out almost 10 years ago. in all that time on any random day i could've decided to sit down and watch it, and i did not. how many more decades will slip by like this? conceivably, it could be all the decades i have left. watching the Emoji Movie would not be, after all, a crucial use of my time. much better things to do. i could easily postpone it over and over and over until my final breath where it may not even register to me that i never did watch the Emoji Movie. no great loss, certainly; and yet i find myself intrigued by Patrick Stewart's involvement

Everyone go look up the song nasa banned from space