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Remember my magical girl Beauty and the Beast idea?

Beauty and the Beast but it's a magical girl story!...redux!

1) Scrape off all remaining food onto one plate, if possible. Napkins, straws, etc. can also be placed here. If there isn’t enough room with one plate, use two. Stack the remaining plates on top of one another, from largest to smallest.  2) Pour all the drinks into one cup (if there is too much then use more cups, similar to plates.) Then, stack the empty cups into one another.

3) gather all remaining reusable utensils and either place them on a plate that isn’t being used for trash, or put them in one of the empty cups.

Now, this setup allows servers to scrape all the food into the trash at once, and pour all the drinks out at once. Stacking the plates also allows for a server to take more dishes at the same time, meaning the tables are turned over quicker and the next person can be seated faster. This is a huge help! It should look something like this:

Please be wary of things not to do when trying to clean a table:

Please do not stuff napkins or other trash into cups. That just means they have to dig out the trash with their hands. Just put it on a plate. 

If you are arriving at a Seat Yourself restaurant, please do NOT sit at a dirty table. You don’t know what the last people that ate there were like. I’ve seen a man eat while very clearly sick, then a family sit their toddler at the dirty table and the kid put their mouth on the dirty cup the man was drinking out of. All you are doing is putting more pressure on the staff and putting yourself in danger.

If, for whatever reason, you do decide to sit at a dirty table or hover over it while it’s being cleaned, do NOT try and “help” by cleaning the table. Once again, servers usually have access to a sink only a few feet away to repeatedly wash their hands at. You do not. It also puts pressure on the server and can feel passive aggressive, like you’re implying they aren’t doing things quickly enough for your liking. 

If you don’t want to scrape the food from plates together, then don’t stack them. People will sometimes just stack the plates together when there is still food in between them, and all it means is that I have to unstick the plates and scrape food off of both sides.

Please do not leave any bodily fluids on the table. This means no bandages, no bloody or snotty tissues, no unwrapped gum, etc. Try and find a trash can to throw those things away yourself. Bodily fluids can spread disease. I had a customer unwrap his bloodied bandage from his arm to change it out on the table, and then leave it for me to clean. 

That seems unlikely given all the people who use that phrase, but I guess they must be separating their own experience from another's?

Because if you've cooked Thanksgiving or something in your own home you KNOW being a line cook is not just "flipping burgers."

Thats WHY you are going out to eat, because YOU are too exhausted to cook yourself ONE burger, so you're willing to spend extra money to have someone else do that LABOR for you. It's valuable to you. They are FEEDING YOU.

And you not just insult them for it but want their entire life to be miserable for it?! Like, cant pay for cancer treatment, cant afford to EAT well themselves, miserable?

So, what, you can feel like sitting at a computer typing into some excel spreadsheets makes you superior?

As you may know, some of us have formed the New Albion Project Squad and begun creating a podfic based on the original Astonishing Tales of the Highly Improbable. Our first episode has just launched, and we're happy to introduce the beginning of this project to all of you.

We have released the fully performed podfic (with subtitles) on YouTube: Son Mi and the Strange City - Part 1

Doodles/sketchs I made while figuring out what I want marjolein to look like