it worries me so much that there’s been this (mostly unintentional) culture built up around coming out, to where young lgbt kids are putting themselves in danger at school and at home because they don’t want to “live a lie.” i just want to say, i came out when i was 15 and it created a lot of difficulties in my life that i could have avoided by waiting until i was older. it isolated me socially, it exposed me to homophobia from my parents, my family, my teachers, and my classmates at the most important developmental stages of my own confidence and sense of self… closeted people are not living a lie. closeted people are surviving. don’t let anyone pressure you to come out before you’re ready. don’t put yourself at risk when you don’t have to.
staying in the closet also doesn’t have to be a huge dramatic life or death thing. i didn’t come out to my family until after i moved away and established myself in another city (on another land mass haha) not because i was in danger or because it wasnt safe for me before, but because i just…. didnt want to. you don’t owe it to *anybody* to come out. not your family, not the rest of the queer community, nobody. do what’s right for you.
