Take It From A Gay Guy

If you eat one starfish leg at a time and have a decent supply, you could have an endless supply of food.

What and why the fuck??

america is truly a shitshow I’m screaming

NIGGA WHAT THE FUCK LMAOOOOO

I'd be the one that shot you in the first place.

understanding yourself is power.

loving yourself is freedom.

Forgiving yourself is peace

And touching yourself is fun as hell

vers of the afternoon

big mood

he works for grindr

All I want tonight

buckle up bitches we’re going to applebee’s

so if in the soulmate au the very first words your soulmate ever says to you are tattooed somewhere on your body since the day you are born imagine having something like ‘man I cant believe dumbledore died’ tattooed on you. imagine being spoiled for a book series that doesnt even exist yet. imagine worrying about this dumbledore guy your whole childhood while not knowing who he is. imagine knowing dumbledore dies before jk rowling even thinks about it.

Everybody go home, this is my favorite soulmate au

So you finally find your soulmate. After years of knowing that dumbledore dies and the entire franchise being ruined, you find him. You’re in the theatre, dumbledore is dead and you hear it. ‘Man I can’t believe dumbledore died’ by a guy walking right by you and in you’re rage you shout ‘You! You’re the one!’ The guy stops, looks at you, his own arm to read the words, then back at you and he says, “That’s not really how I imagined that being said”

It got better

Just saying @capsing wrote the greatest fic ever that features this. Look her up on ao3