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@freebreadbasement

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this man asked if its okay to buy an engagement ring with a skull on it and antoni went through every stage of grief in the background within about four seconds
x
acceptance
“I’m not a fan.”
idk who she is but im cackling…lmfaoo
if i had the aladdin lamp i would ask for a genie blowjob and then a second genie blowjob immediately after. my third wish would be to increase world hunger

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I like how one of the most prestigious and respected marine institutions on the planet posted this with zero context.
this is the most powerful most culturally significant work of art of our generation
I wish I could watch this for the first time again
Every DnD game that starts out with a serious “Lord of the Rings” type of tone turns into a Monty Python sketch and every DnD game that starts out like a Monty Python sketch turns into Lord of the Rings
DnD game with characters named Kua the Brave, Enoch Bluehelm, and Hallow Greaves: Our current mission is to save the kingdom from the Dark Queen Ravenbone but we fucked up a charisma roll and now Kua and Ravenbone are dating and the king of Fendale was turned into a frog
DnD game with characters named Bunny Wabbit, Ford Trukk, and Dildo Baggins: Our current mission is to find a birthday present for a spoiled prince but in the process we found a lich planning to devour the life force of everyone in the land and Dildo gave his life to stop him in a scene so moving it won the Newberry Medal
If you give your players room to do whatever they want, including be silly, they will most often choose to express themselves. And you'd be amazed how much you'll start to care about characters once people have attached little pieces if their soul to them.
If you try to enforce a "serious" tone, it just makes the gags funnier, and your players will treat you with the same casual blasphemy orangutans show to God.
"the same casual blasphemy orangutans show to God" WHAT THE FUCK I'M DECEASED
clone wars constantly yo-yos between “no matter how fair the government claims it is, it will always become corrupt by corporate greed” to “check out this cool spaceship” to “companies are willing to sell potentially dangerous resources to a desperate population if it means more profit” to “this space wizard just threw a rock with their mind and cut it in half with a laser sword how sick is that" and I think that’s wonderful
this one episode starts with a monologue about how criminals exploit the fear of the masses during wartime for personal gain and then it immediately cuts to C3P0 planning a brunch

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Having animals of different species is like living with roommates of different nationalities where sometimes you accidentally speak French to your Spanish roommate and it doesn’t work. If a chicken hops on the table while I’m eating I can make her back off by telling her KWÊK. But if the cats are doing something illegal and I get mixed up and tell them KWÊK they’ll just laugh at me. Lady, we aren’t afraid of angry chicken sounds. But an angry cat sound? A loud, hissing PSHHH? They’ll scram. Pandolf doesn’t need any sounds, if you just give him a disappointed look it’ll break his soft dog heart and he’ll beg for a path to redemption. You give a chicken a disappointed look, she just returns it and now you’re the one feeling like a failure.
apparently this is a thing in Japan too, and it gets translated as “Mundane Halloween.” There are loads of photos online and they’re all so good?????
“Person going to work on a windy day"
“Woman who’s having her bang cut but the hairdresser is nowhere to be found"
"Zookeeper in charge of the pandas"
i learned that Twitty bird is male
Aoogah is Tweety’s girlfriend and traveling companion
follow @i-was-today-years-old-when for more!
we’re really at that point in the year where no one cares about anything huh
My psych professor mentioned swaddling in lecture so I emailed him a picture of me being swaddled in my dorm room and asked if I could get extra credit because it was really hot in there and I got really sweaty and he was like “fabulous, sure”
I’m going to miss the Honors Advisor from my university.

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there’s a fucking furry at the mall!!!!
what the hell is an “"easter bunny”“
My app crashed three times trying to reblog this, and I feel that was the universe trying to stop me from giving others whiplash.