Yee Haw (Taylor’s version)

overheard in the coffee shop from a middle aged gay man to his (female) friend: “are you embarrassed? about being foolish? please manage yourself better in this situation. this man is not behaving as if he is interested in you.”

“he’s evil. like jeff bezos. Do you understand.” and she’s just nodding with eyes downcast in shame

i forgot to add this until now but after the gay guy was done scolding his friend and they left, their table was taken up by an aging european twink telling a wealthy-looking bubbe with increasing distress about how much cold cut meat he’d eaten the night before and the funnier she found it the more distraught he got about his nighttime deli frenzy

he was like [completely unidentifiable european accent] after you went to bed. i ate ze ham. and ze mortadella also… and. also the prosciutto. no stop giggling at me zis is not funny it was 500 grams each. i ate 500 grams of ze ham and 500 grams of ze mortadella and 500 grams of ze prosciutto and that is ONE POINT FIVE KILOGRAMS OF MEAT !! I ate so many meats!!! Stop giggling at me i am going to be fat!!!! I even ate ze cheeses!!!

so many people are tagging this with some variation of “that coffee shop was full of such interesting people i wish i could go somewhere like this to people watch” and as a seasoned eavesdropper i need you all to know that people are this weird wherever you go. recently my gf and i were observing a gaggle of real estate broker bros hopped up on stimulants pacing around like caged tigers and performing homoerotic rituals through the proxy of their iced lattes and it wasn’t even 10am on a tuesday. the world is a beautiful place full of intricately bizarre human animals waiting to be studied

To my younger swiftie friends just take a moment to think about how completely over Taylor's life felt at 26 vs how full and gorgeous and joyful it is at 36 and then think about how people say it gets better and take a big deep breath and hang in there ❤️❤️❤️

When you are young, they assume you know nothing but I knew you through the daze of the blades of the grass in summer. Cross your heart, won't tell no other. Parachutes for the free fall of being younger. Love you to the moon and to Saturn. I memorized the sound of your bare footsteps. Running wild, it's been a long time. Life has ways of leaving those days behind, but love has ways of bringing things back to life. Man, it's been a while, but I knew it, I knew you. And I knew you'd come back to me ‘cause I knew everything when I was young and just like a folk song, our love will be passed on.

When the post goes triple platinum in the mutual circle and you have to scroll past the same thing seven times in a row

When you are young, they assume you know nothing but I knew you through the daze of the blades of the grass in summer. Cross your heart, won't tell no other. Parachutes for the free fall of being younger. Love you to the moon and to Saturn. I memorized the sound of your bare footsteps. Running wild, it's been a long time. Life has ways of leaving those days behind, but love has ways of bringing things back to life. Man, it's been a while, but I knew it, I knew you. And I knew you'd come back to me ‘cause I knew everything when I was young and just like a folk song, our love will be passed on.

It’s all corrupt girl

reblogged. reblogged. reblogged. youre all reblogged. none of you are free from my scrapbook