☆fishiepink

Do you sometimes think about how during the first time Patroclus sees Achilles, his own father tells him “That’s how a son should be.” and how years later, Patroclus dies on the battlefield in that boy’s name and armor, after having effortlessly tricked two entire armies into thinking he’s Achilles?

my mom just had a 7cm brain tumor removed and since she's woken up she's been talking nonstop about this dream she had about going to an art gallery full of colourful paintings by a 'homosexual artist' named klimsdorf who was ethereal and wise, both young and old... at first she was convinced he was a real person but after failing to find him online she's accepted he was a figment of her subconscious mind and is now determined to bring him to life via painting his portrait herself. she's 67 and has never drawn in her life. and now this. blorbo from her tumor

survived checking my bank account. i deserve a little treat

this had better not alter the Numbers in my bank account

by Talos this can't be happening

Xanax

get into actual fights to the death to gain perspective

serious question: can anyone else see this post? am I hallucinating?

this is like Schrodinger’s fucking meme because half the time the pic is deleted and the other half it’s visible

this is near ne

why didnt you prevent this

ao3′s orphaning option is cool and a good idea but mostly very fucking funny. i posted this work for fun when i was younger and i still want people to be able to come back to it if they liked it, but now im an adult professional and i dont want it attached to my name. whats the word for that? umm, anonymously posting? no. i want something that indicates i murdered this story’s parents 

technically the story’s parents faked their own death and disappeared to go have an office job, and that’s even funnier

If a worker who isn't the owner says ANYTHING similar to "I'm not really supposed to do this but-" and then does something that helps you, under no circumstances inform the business, including through reviews. You tell them that the worker was polite, professional, the very model of customer service and why you like to go there. You do not breathe a word of the rulebreaking.