Little Fox Thoughts

The leadership vote isn't actually to elect the Prime Minister, it's to elect the head of the Labour Party and because Labour are in power the head of the party is also the PM. There are about 330,000 Labour Party members. (As a member of one of the UK's largest trade unions I also get a vote, despite hating the modern Labour Party and all who sail in her.)

So, we could have a new PM voted in by just over 400,000 self-selected people through a three-stage process that no one really understands.

Oh, and our head of state is a pensioner whose very very very distant ancestor killed a distant relative almost 1,000 years ago. Who is also the head of the state religion cause a slightly less distant ancestor wanted a son to inherit the position but ended up with a daughter inheriting anyways.

My pride post is that it happens slowly.

I think a lot of us grow up trying to be someone else. Someone accepted, the person our families and our society wants us to be. Anything that's real and authentic gets labelled 'dangerous'.

I didn't start accepting who I was until my mid-thirties. I'd spent my whole life up to that point knowing that there was this tiny person inside my head piloting the meat suit and I couldn't wait for the pilot to finally live in the real world.

So I brought a new wardrobe, endured a lot of uncomfortable conversations, stopped talking to my family, fought for hormones... And nothing happened. You know, the pilot was still piloting and everything was still a threat to my life.

The other day, there was a guy at the house fixing the sofa. My partner messaged me to say it was done. I was so fucking ecstatic. I messaged back that the sofa guy and I were now best friends, we were going to get pizza and go bowling and I was going to let him win.

And I sat back and waited for the spike of anxiety. Like, now I'd said it it was going to happen and I'd have to spend time with this guy and I'd have to be his friend and be vulnerable with him and there was nothing worse, nothing worse, nothing worse...

The anxiety didn't come. Just had the thought off, 'haha yeah, if it ever did happen maybe we would get on'.

It happens slowly. Living authentically is a verb. The more you do it, the deeper its roots get into you.

So Obi-Wan is wearing a farmer's outfit.

And now I can't help but picture Obi-Wan being a grizzeled sensai Jedi master in, like, a check shirt and dirty jeans. Sacrificing himself like he's spent all day riding a tractor. Opening Luke's eyes to the Force with a half-drunk beer in his hand. Appearing as a Force ghost like he's just back from Taylors Supplies after getting a dozen sacks of hog feed.

And you know... I thought it would be funny. But it just somehow increases his gravitas, you know?