i write because you exist...✎

A goodbye kiss

You did not have to use words, your kiss said it all. The way you kissed me that night, I understood that it was time to let you go. I saw your eyes and i realised i had already lost you. I saw your tears and i realised i am not the one for you. It still kinda hurts you know, because for me you were everything i could ever ask for your kiss was a goodbye, my kiss was a promise.

Becoming

It’s time to blossom It’s time to open up and see the world It’s time to feel the sun on your skin It’s time to see the light in your world It’s not about you showing the world who you are It’s about you coming into your being The true and authentic you Spring doesn’t last forever Neither will you Blossom It’s time. Your time.

a year

It's been a year since I last saw you It's been a year since I last smiled at you It's been a year since I lost you It's been a year, and a day hasn't gone by without me wanting you back It's been a year, and a day hasn't gone by without me missing you It's been a year, and a day hasn't gone by without me thinking of you It's been a year, and you're gone.

please notice

I never understood  why people complain about constantly having  a loved one on their mind until i caught myself waking up thinking of you  or falling asleep and dreaming of us -the constant reminders found everywhere i turned, of what could’ve been or for what i yearned

malo

I was tired of staying  Of waiting  For you  I had nowhere to go  You were my everything  And until she came  I think I might have been yours  But she was better  And that’s okay  No matter how hard I try not to  I care about you  I miss you  I think about you  I always will  I loved you  Maybe I still do  You have the key to my heart  They all warned me  Told me I can’t trust you  I can’t care about you  I can’t love you  I did all these things  And surprisingly  I don’t regret anything  And for you  I’d do it all over again

unrequited love

It's 2AM & i'm writing about you

I want you to hug me & never let me go again. I f*cked up, I know

but I don't want someone new i just want you. you are the one i think about every single day. I know you will never read it because you hate me but i just want you to know

the memories we had were few but i miss every one of them so much. You were special, the last of your kind & i am so sorry I did not appreciate you. I am so sorry for being so stupid risking to lose you. I wish you could understand one day that everything i said to you was true. I wish you knew how much i miss you right now ...

what i am trying to say is that.. i love you.. i really do.

it’s time to go

oh sweet first love, how bitter this place has become.

i still care for you. and i always will.

but i have to go.

i've become tired, my body is decaying in the memories of your touch.

know that it's not easy for me.

know that you are the only person that has ever made me feel.

and please.

know that i don't hate you. 

thank you for every memory,

but i have to go....

to this day; 

Imagine living a good life together you by his side and vice versa With every up followed a down yet you seemed to always work through it except then you didn’t.

you thought he’d come back and he thought you’d try only this time you didn’t

You decided to leave him, you decided to live on your own without him by your side anymore.

years after years, you want him back. you long for him. you find for him and you found him.

he is not the same as before, he is now strong, he still loves you, indeed he always loves you, you say; "i want you back in my life, my love. will you be mine?

he says; "dear honey, you don't have to ask for me as I am always yours. Don't ever leave me again. I love you, my dear"

potentially

our story

could've have been so much more 

but i decided 

to close the book

before i could finish it 

removing you.

screaming fuck you

into the wind on a chilly night

the moon is full

as i empty myself of you

3:29:50 pm

tell me again

what is there to love

december

maybe this time around

we’ll actually fit

October’s fall

you nearly broke me in two

the night you admitted

that you were afraid

i don’t know

i guess we got so used

to loving the wrong person

that it became increasingly difficult

to be more open

and willing

when the right one

comes along

the choice

i didn’t quit

i simply chose myself

instead of continuing to try

for someone who wouldn’t

try for me

from his perspective

you left

and i wanted you still

yet i deserved someone

who was willing to stay

the mental freedom

thinking about you

sucked me further

intro darkness

and as hard as it’s been

i’ve been working harder

to free my mind of you