who

i literally hate language, i hate that you can just say shit like this and it actually makes sense

I love being in college because there are no actual adults around so everyone is just going around bullshitting their way through basic tasks. Like I can be like “I think I got better from my cold because I ate an orange yesterday” and everyone is like “Yeah makes sense” and somebody could just be like “I’m gonna put my pillow in the washing machine to clean it” and everyone’s like “Sounds like a great idea John”

Fifteen hours remain.

sorry guys i tripped

did you make this just to be petty

Everything I have ever done has had being petty as the goal

why is he sitting like a 14th century monarch

he is one

thank you, Russian Spy Agent

Putin is really looking out for our personal growth and development huh

okay but why the fuck do you black out when all you pokemon faint?

cause im sad

oh lets listen to the guy pretending to be waluigi on the internet they seem to clearly be rational and smart, much like i know waluigi to be

Yeah me having a waluigi themed account clearly negates my ability to have a fucking valid opinion. Ok.

You shouldn’t have let his words have the power to upset you, Waluigi

mood: the mexican dude who told judge judy “this is your show but this is my episode”

me at god

this is one of the Russian Chaos Agents tumblr banned lmao

Nefarious Russian plot to make relatable text posts on tumblr dot com

one of my favorite weird history moments has got to be when american agents tasked with nixon’s security while he was in the soviet union as vice president under eisenhower detected unusual amounts of radiation in his hotel room so they discussed it loudly to each other to make sure the soviets knew that they knew since there were obviously bugs everywhere and the next day it just mysteriously went away and they never learned any more about it

life during the cold war was just whatever