Fuck Around And Find Out

Shane getting his own rookie that he takes under his wing (the rookie is gay.. Shane is not aware of this yet)

Richie Tozier is Mike Wheeler one shot

Trans fem or gender fluid Shane Hollander

Rwrb x hr crossover where Alex and Ilya has hooked up

Shane being friends with one direction and/or other random celebrities though his brand deals and modeling career

Shane being friends with Kip and Scott

Shane having hooked up with Kip in 2014.. Ilya and Scott find out

Cutesy hollanovas fic

Smutty hannigram fic where they do unspeakable things infront of a (already dead) victim

Shane and Ilya body swap BUT it’s early on like 2015 so Ilya still thinks Shane’s the golden boy. He expects it to be easy but quickly learns it’s not as easy as he expected and that while his home life is shit his career is easy Shane’s home is fine if you don’t count his over bearing mother but his career is far from easy and way more similar to Ilyas home life for his own comfort (+plus points if he spots red lines littering Shane’s beautiful thighs :))

The Mexico top was bad bunny and Shane had no clue, Ilya finds out because he’s watching an mv on the tv at some point and Shane freezes when he sees his old hookup on the screen

The wags assuming Shane’s the top and being proven very wrong

Carter finding out about hollanov/carter getting war flashbacks from his conversation with Scott and Shane in Sochi

What part of recovery are you in when your work with knifes constantly and won’t make the cut on purpose but at the same time kinda wish you’d slip and accidentally cut your own arm on accident?

Sh is so fucking funny cuz you really don’t realize how easy it is to fall back on old habits like I’ve been clean for literal years now and still less than a week of working with knives on the daily has me once again fantasizing about how easy it’d be.

Like wth actually?? Why am I closer to stabbing my thing with that fucking thing than I have been since I quit last time???

Just me? Okay then.. hahaaa

Shane can shake ass. Like scarily well. No one knows why or how.

The metros find out after the first cup win when Shane gets drunk for the first time (with them around) and holy fuck that man knows not only how to dance but also how to shake ass like there’s no tomorrow.

The cens find out when they manage to get Shane to go out with him and one of the wags bet none of the guys can do it. Shane says bet and shocks everyone, except Ilya.

He avoids questions for a while but grows tired of it after awhile and just says “ask Ilya he knows why I can move my hips so well.”

Scott and Kip don’t talk before Sochi, so when Carter talks to him and Shane about Joe he feels like a bucket of ice has been dumped on him. Even so after he’s processed what Carter said he feels warm at the words shared by his friend.

He feels safe in a way he hadn’t before. And he knew that it could be different if it was your own teammate but at the same time he didn’t think Carter would care not any more at least.

Once they are back in New York they are in Scott’s apartment sitting on the couch when Scott speaks before she can really think about it too hard.

“I met someone” a bref moment of silence before Carter grins at him and montions for him to continue. “His names Kip.” He says carefully but Carter lights up like there was nothing out of the ordinary with the conversation.

“Yea? How did you meet??” Scott had to take a second to process before he blinked at his best friend with tears burning in his eyes.

“Did you not hear me?” He asked softly and Carter looked confused.

“I heared you perfectly?”

“I said his name is Kip.” Carter paused and the. Gave Scott a sad smile.

“ I know Scotty” he says quietly. “I heard you, I don’t care but thank you for trusting me.” Scott just stared at him for a long time but then Carter smiled.

Irina Rozanova has in the eyes of most people around her won at life. She has a wealthy husband, she has two beautiful children and will never have to work a day in her life.

It’s picture perfect. Except, it isn’t. Irina didn’t marry for love, she didn’t even marry for money, no, it was an arranged marriage by her family. Her dad had pretty much sold her to the highest bidder. She didn’t live him, never would probably couldn’t even if she tried.

Anastasia though? She could love her. Nastya was her best friend always had been. They had been way more than friends really but no one knew about that. Except that her husband found their letters to one another. He forced her out. Told her to leave and never comeback and if she even tried to contact Ilya or Alexei he would make sure everyone knew.

Her and Nastya ran, they booked the first flight out of Russia and left everything behind. They settled in Ottawa Canada. In a quiet part of time. Irina had enough money in her bank account over from Grigori that they could buy a small house next to a couple with a son who must have been Ilyas age. They became auntie Irina and Nastya, Shane, the kid would stay with them occasionally when his parents had to leave town or just because he wanted to.

They watched him grow and Irina saw glimpses of Ilya in him sometimes when he talked about hockey. Then one winter in 2008 Shane came over looking hesitant before asking them to teach him Russian. They agreed easily.

Later Shane would explain that there was a kid on the Russian team who probably would be drafted and his explanation hadn’t really made sense but the two women had smiled at each other knowingly and helped him.

By the time Shane moved to Montreal Shane would call them regularly to practice his Russian. After Shane moved it was so quiet, David, Yuna and the two of them would have dinners together. During the summers sometimes Shane would come over and hang out with them. The years passed and then in the summer of 2017 there was a knock on their door before it opened the door and Shane’s voice came from the door. “Auntie Nastya! Auntie Irina!” The two women looked at each other smiling then Nastya called back still in Russian.

“Kitchen Shane!” There was two pairs of footsteps that entered and just outside of the door Shane and and whoever was with him paused, there was quiet whispers and then the door opened and Shane stepped in looking nervously at them but he was smiling. As he spoke the Russian flowed from his lips as if he’d been practicing without them.

“I wanted to introduce someone to you and I know you won’t mind it’s just scary because it’s important but um yea. I want you to like him… and he’s also Russian and I want him to have someone other than me he can speak Russian with so yea.. I, I want you to meet my boyfriend. Ilya.” Both women were smiling at him fondly and Shane geastured at the door and a tall man with curly blond hair walked him he looked nervous looking between the women placing himself at Shane’s side.

Irina world stopped. Those eyes. That was, that was her son that was her Ilya, all grown up and he looked so happy. He looked so perfect. Irina felt her eyes well up with tears as she looked at him then at Shane.

“Auntie?” Shane asked softly, hesitatingly reaching for her. Ilya was looking at her in confusion his eyes void of recognition she didn’t blame him for it, it had been so long.

So so long since she had seen him last. That was his baby but at the same time he was now a fully grown man. He wasn’t sure what Griggori had told them about her disappearance. She assumed he’d said she just left.

Half of her was scared to reveal that she was his mother because of it but she couldn’t keep it in if he hated her then so be it. She would always love him because that was her baby and she needed him to know that.

“Ilyushenka” she whispered reaching out but hesitated before actually touching him, her hand was shaking she couldn’t stop it. Ilyas eyes widened as he froze, he looked at her his eyes flickering over her face. His eyes welling with tears and recognition at the same time.

“Mama?” His voice broke and he looked at Nastya “Auntie?” Both women looked at him with tears rolling down their faces as they nodded at him. Ilya broke into sobs and Irina wrapped him in a tight hug. Nastya joined them both after awhile and hugged them both tightly.

“How- you- I-“ his eyes were flickering between the two of them and then to Shane before he slumped into a chair that had been pulled out in all the commotion. Shane was also crying covering his mouth with his hand as he watched the whole thing go down.

“Ilyushenka I’m so sorry, I wanted to take you with me I wanted to bring you and Alexei with me but he wouldn’t have let me. You were safer there with him than trying to cross the border with us. I’m so sorry baby. I love you so much, I’ve missed you everyday.” Ilya looked completely lost for a moment.

I don’t, you’re supposed to be dead” he was crying again but silently this time and Irina wondered how often he’d had to do it to be so good at it. “He said you swallowed your whole pill bottle. I don’t, why,” he stopped speaking obviously not finding the words he was looking for.

“We had to run, he found our letters. He said I had to get out never contact you again or there would be consequences so we left and we ended up here. I am so sorry, we bother are.” Ilya just shook his head and clutched at both their hands.

“I don’t blame you, you did nothing this isn’t on you. I just, I missed you. I” he looked at Shane with a small smile. “I can’t help but think maybe it was fate, that we ended up together. Maybe. We were ment to find each other.” Shane smiles at him and then leans down and presses a kiss to Ilyas forehead.

He looked at his mother and Nastya who he assumed could only be his other mama and smiled before he geastired to Shane.

I want to look in the mirror wearing a dress and for it to not feel wrong.

I want to be able to tell people I met someone and not have to wait until I know they are safe.

I want, I want l, I want.

I want to not have to look over my shoulder as I walk at night scared of what would happen if I didn’t.

I want to fall in love

I want to tell people my name and not be scared as I do so that the wrong people will hear me say it.

I’m not a boy, just like I’m not a girl, I’m not either or both. I don’t know what I am.

I want a boy to kiss me and think he’s kissing another boy just like I want another girl to kiss me and see a girl?

Maybe, maybe not.

The voices get louder they pull in different directions

I want to tell people but what do I say? There’s nothing to tell.

How do I explain?

Is it all in my head?

I want to know.

I want, I want, I want.

I will always want, I have always wanted. But what?

The Metros have a separate group chat without Shane in it. He doesn’t know about it until after he comes out. He’s borrowing Hayden’s phone only for him to get a text from the chat calling him a several slurs. He opens the chat then and finds that most of it is just the team talking shit about him.

Hayden never participated and neither did jj but they didn’t intervene either and he also discovers that the chat has existed for almost as long as he’s been a part of the team.

He doesn’t mention it to Hayden or jj. Not to Ilya or his parents not even to rose.

He starts to notice things after that. How no one wants to sit close to him anymore, how the invite to go out never even enters the main chat anymore. How they look at him like he’s dirty or gum on the soles of their shoes.

He tries not to let it bother him, tries to ignore it, but even so he can’t pretend he didn’t see the comments about his hair, his body or his skill. His race. It wasn’t just shit about his sexuality like he’d expected when he opened the chat.

He starts spending more time at the rink, he eats less as well but it’s only because he’s constantly nauseous nothing else. No really he’s fine! He’s just on a stricter diet Ilya you don’t need to worry!! He cuts his hair again even after promising Ilya he wouldn’t.

When Ilya asks him about it Shane just says it was getting in the way while playing and Ilya buys it because despite what Ilya claims he is a good liar and always has been.

He’s always been independent, he’s solved his issues by himself just like he will with this as well. He just needs to get better and maybe then they’ll respect him again.

Then everything will go back to normal. Except it doesn’t.

It doesn’t go back to normal and it doesn’t get better, if anything it gets worse. And Shane is slowly killing himself trying to prove hes good enough to a team that doesn’t want him anymore. A team that wants him out, a team that hates him.

But Shane can’t see it, he can’t see how much they hate him because he loves them, it’s the rose colored glasses that stay firmly in place. Until the video. Until they get outed because then they get violently yanked off. And for the first time Shane can see just how wrong he was.

He wasn’t the issue, never had been and he could see it now, how much muscle he’s lost, how thin he was. How tired he was. It was lucky as well that it happened when it did because Shane didn’t know how much longer he could have gone on like that.

He had a feeling that had he not stopped when he did he wouldn’t have made it to his wedding day. He too would have left Ilya and that breaks his heart more than the realization that he could have died does. Because appart from Ilya, would it really be that bad? It’s not like anyone would miss him that badly.

Shane isn’t saying that he’d do it just that if he happened to die would it really have been so bad? If he died because of hockey he feels like he wouldn’t have minded because he’d have died doing what he loved.

Except

He doesn’t feel like he loves it anymore, he knows he loves hockey but it doesn’t feel fun anymore. And it hasn’t been fun for a long time. Besides the all stars of 2017 he doesn’t remember when stepping on to the ice became more of a chore than his dream.

Hell always love hockey a part of him at least but he hasn’t realized how complicated of a relationship he had with the sport. He didn’t know who he was without it and yet in the last few years hockey rarely brought him the happiness it once did.

Ilya skates out to warm up and his head snaps out when he hears someone say they can see Shane with the rest of the wags.

Ilya looks at them and freezes almost fainting from how quickly his blood rushes to his dick at the sight. He playes the whole game hard and then as soon as he gets home he has Shane pinned against their door and hurriedly pushes his hand into Shane’s pants to tease his hole only he’s met with something hard.

He pulls away too look at Shane clearly only to see him grin at him slyly.

Shane turns around and bends over bracing on door with one hand as the other pulls his pants down and the pull his cheek to the side showing of the plug sitting there.

Ilya moans loudly before pouncing on Shane and fucking him right there and then.

Round two they make it to the bed and Shane rides him hard his still hurting foot completely disregarded, he’s played through worse before he barely feels it and honestly? He enjoys the pain.

Not that Shane and Ilya are officially together and Ilya is in Ottawa the foundation has been announced and everything is set in place for them to be friends.

They start out slowly testing the waters, meeting up in public for lunch and so on and so forth. As times go on nothing really changes the metros are confused but they can’t really do anything about it cuz Shane still plays his hardest against Ilya.

After a while they both decide to push the boundaries of what they can get away with a lot it turns out. As time passes they get more and more physical Ilya walking down the street with an arm around Shane, ass grabs and so on.

Still nothing. Shane comes out and now they assume people will start putting the pieces together still nothing.

After that both of them start to realize just how stupid and heteronormative their sport is and especially its players.

After that it becomes a game. Who can go the furthest before someone figues them out. It turns out really fucking far because Ilya once kisses Shane’s cheek infront of the whole team and still nothing.

At that point Shane would not be surprised if they could get away with having sex infront of them and his team and the other players and they’d still just call them friends.

No one would know for many years why Shane Hollander never married, never stepped foot in another rink again, never put on a pair of skates.

Two people died that day but the world was only aware of one just like the world would never know exactly what happened between Shane and Ilya.

Two people died but only one found peace.

Shane would walk the planes of the earth for several more years before he too managed to share the peace with his lover in the ground.

It would take about her two years before their story became public knowledge, two years where the hockey world had to question what made Shane Hollander take his last breath.

A modern tragedy where they both die at the end, they made history behind closed doors.

I am confused

In the show him and Kip meet before the Olympics right? Cuz they are there and then we get the four months earlier thing

But in the book Kip says he led team USA to Olympic gold three years ago..