Maybe it is because I can’t seem to love myself, people never want to love me.

Alone. She ignores it all day, keeps busy with school or work or anything to distract her mind. She avoids sleep because she knows she can’t escape it then, the loneliness in her chest. Eventually she has to give in and she hopes she’s exhausted enough to fall straight to sleep. She doesn’t want to let those thoughts in. But she can’t fight it forever. It’s at 2 am, when she lays curled up in bed because she doesn’t want to feel the emptiness, that her mind turns to black. The darkness of heartbreak crashes in and the tears swell in her eyes while her body shakes until exhaustion takes over and she falls asleep. She may get a few hours of rest, but she knows it will all start again tomorrow. The cycle of loneliness. The cycle of missing him.

sometimes when I’m angry or stressed or sad I think about whales just swimming around in the ocean, doing whale shit. like, they’re the biggest goddamn mammals on the planet. they don’t have time for little problems. there’s too much chill-ass whale shit to do.