And they replay in my mind like my least favorite tune. I try to disguise my shame in smiles, but I’d prefer solitude right now 

I am completely down mentally. I am actually no good and I want to be no good in got damn peace.

I didn’t realize how much I called my mom to help me calm down until she passed away and now here I am with no one to call or talk to bc don’t understand and they just look at me like I’m stupid.

Stress eating. I want everything. I’m considering going to the store just for chips

Never get comfortable — you’ve seen the results.

I was trying to process my emotions, but I don’t think that’s possible. I don’t have anyone to unpack these emotions with as therapy is out of the equation—because who can afford it? So, today, I do what must be done: label a mental box “grief and the emotions thereafter”, and forward all of my feels there. It’s either that, or crumble from the constant weight of needing to get something off my chest.