kieran

snappy ricardo

They had come to you half-dead already, dragging every ruined thing behind them. And you recognized them immediately because you had the same smell. Same putrid rot underneath your overgrown fingernails. Same unsatisfied hunger that never shuts up no matter how much consume, how much you hit, how much you starve, how much you cut. Normal individuals can sense people like you from miles away. Those people don’t hesitate to run away. But you looked at each other, recognizing that look in their eyes - watering eyes, from too many mean isolated winters. There is a comfort in finding somebody who is as ruined as you are. Not fully healed nor fixing themselves. Just honestly.. absolutely ruined. That is what makes everything so dangerous. You could claim that running around with a ticking bomb would be safer. Because once you know somebody that deeply, once you've listened to them cry, once you've seen the way they stare at the ceiling like they're waiting for anything to finally answer their pleads, there is no going back to basic ordinary affection after that. You become stitched together completely wrong. Similar to two decaying bodies buried in the same grave on accident long enough for the bones to forget which skeleton they belonged to. You know there is no going back so you lean into it. You open your chest like a creaking kitchen cabinet and let them dig around inside for any scraps. Feeding off of each other because starving people always do. They hesitantly handed you their wounds and you treated them like something precious. You kissed, adored and accepted every terrible thing about them because nobody else would touch it without gloves on. The truth is sometimes love isn't two people saving each other. Sometimes it's two drowning idiots holding each other underwater just so they don't have to die alone.