Saw this on facebook and am keeping the momentum going. I’ve copied all the fundraiser links below, and here’s the link to the original post in case you’d prefer to look at the list that way.
Help me get home, please! $1,609/10,000 《《 high priority
Gender Fluid Human In Need Of Help $1,670/3,500
Adopted Trans Woman seeking safety & medical help $17,085/29,000
Shane’s Top Surgery $2,101/7,750 《《 this one has been up for over a year and he’s still waiting
Help J Remove Themselves from Toxic Household $1,372/2,500 《《 needs more contributions
Grace Mwangi’s Gender Confirmation Surgery $2,986/38,000
Nyne’s top surgery $2,943/8,000
Help Grayson start transition $1,201/2,000 《《 keep this going!
Skyler’s Transition Fund €458/3,000 《《 needs more contributions
Londynn’s New Life $8,828/15,000
NYIEMÄ’S GENDER CONFIRMATION FUND $8,770/37,000
Zoeys transition fund £4,224/10,000
Supporting Black Trans Elders cashapp $fakerapper $16,312/100,000
Top Surgery For Yadriel Acazio $1,817/11,000 《《 this one needs a boost
Coco’s Medical Transition Fund $3,430/15,000
Maya’s Transition & Recovery Fund $1,957/35,744 《《 needs more contributions
Help Create Corbyn $1,883/4,000
Flora’s Transition Fund $800/5,000 《《 needs more contributions
Amina Transition And Rent Fund €3,382/5,000
Help Guilly Get Top Surgery!! $3,070/7,500
Atticus’ homeless fund $5,598/10,000
HOUSING FOR TRANS WOMEN OF COLOR $7,453/60,000
Ahren’s Top Surgery $3,961/7,500
Malakai’s Top Surgery $1,119/10,000 《《 needs more contributions
Top Surgery $7,625/8,000 《《 so close; let’s close the gap!
Phoenix gotta move! $987/45,000 《《 needs more contributions
Kiana’s Gender Transition $2,140/35,000
Jacobs top surgery $6,870/8,000
Skye’s Top Surgery $2,037/8,500
Hunter’s Top Surgery $4,805/12,000 《《 time sensitive, get this funded before September!
Alexandria’s Transition fund $3,562/40,000
Myles’s Tracheal Shave Procedure $2,980/8,450
Zeke’s Top Surgery Fund $4,469/9,000
help koo start a new life $1,009/25,000 《《 needs more contributions
Landon’s Top Surgery! $810/2,000 《《 it’s a small goal, but so vital to covering what insurance doesn’t
Donate to Myla’s Breast Augmentation $1,992/6,000
Vanessa L. Naisha needs support to seek justice! $14,568/15,000 《《 so close! Let’s close the final gap
Travis’ Transition Fund $14,777/30,000
Disabled Enby Needing Help For Top Surgery! $2,610/8,500 《《 NEEDS FUNDING BEFORE AUGUST 4TH
Tyler’s Transition Fund $13,285/30,000
Clarabelle’s Gender Affirmation Surgery $10,415/20,000
help deluca get top surgery ! $4,842/7,000
Help Black Trans Woman Transition $18,495/20,700
Wriply’s surgery/ continued living fund $8,642/26,520 《《 this one has been up since 2018. I found Wriply’s socials and she’s still active, still waiting. Let’s get this fulfilled
Help a black trans woman w/ advanced cancer in ATL $21,741/25,000 《《 keep the momentum going
Help Harmony, a Black Trans Woman Survive $7,676/20,000
Help a black trans-man get FTM top surgery! $6,069/15,000
Malikais Top Surgery $4,097/7,500
Finn’s Therapy & Wellness Fund $2,960/7,000
Kyo’s (aka Key) Transition Fund $13,514/25,000
Transition Funds for Dallas $6,790/15,000
Help a Black Trans Woman from homelessness $6,606/8,000 《《 let’s get this goal met asap
Bottom Surgery and Electrolysis $6,329/40,000
Noelle’s Breast Augmentation $11,155/13,000
Aeri’s Moving Out & Transition Fund $14,819/20,000 《《 more than halfway; keep it going
SAVE A TEENAGE TRANSMAN’S LIFE $4,520/25,000
Cody’s Top Surgery $2,598/7,000
Help Kit get Top Surgery $1,829/6,000
I will periodically update the progress amounts. As the goals are met, I’ll mark them as funded and change the colors from green to pink to make it clear. I’m also tagging the ones that could use more attention with red.
Been hearing a lot about “reparations” lately? Well, this is one way to start working towards that, since those in power certainly won’t.
This one has an urgent deadline, August 4th ⬇️
https://gf.me/u/x8y8ak
Short Summary:I am an individual non-binary pansexual guy who has bee… Atlas Raymond Ursen needs your support for Disabled Enby Needing Hel
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ppl misunderstand me when I say "I want more [thing] in stories". I don't mean "I'm going to love every single one" I mean "I'm very picky and I want more of it in circulation so I can actually choose from a wealth of them and be discerning". I see ppl being like "you say you want more of [this thing] but you don't like [example of it]" YEAH CUZ I'M PICKY!!!!!!!! I have opinions and standards????? not all of them are gonna be the same I wanna be able to look at 100 of them and go "I want these 20" not "I only have 3 to choose from and I don't like any of them" you feel me??????
people’s Takes about, like, genAI’s or crypto’s massive energy and water waste issue actually being a nonissue bc don’t you know all internet utilities use those????????????? are genuinely so stupid and disingenuous i’m sorry. you’re telling me you can’t discern any difference between using resources to facilitate hugely/broadly useful concepts, such as the internet at large, versus, like, a gigantic recent increase in water use to nonconsensually make every google result even worse and generate slop videos for twitter?? babe!
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The ideal book is 500 blank pages which act as a safe space that allows the reader full control over the narrative without running the risk of nonconsentually forcing their train of thought or violating their cognitive boundaries
6 months ago I saw someone post a whole thread about how she actually doesn't like to listen to music because even 3 minute songs put you into moods and that manipulates your brain and upsets it actually (no matter if sad/energetic/angry/lullaby) from its natural state and that's harmful. (???)
Same with books, wow, she didn't use the word cognitohazard, but that's exactlywhat she meant.
I can't even begin to begin to grasp how weird this line of thinking is to me like, oh my god we people can't do anything we're just so fragile. Writing and drawing are off - you have to think of the unsupervised children and every single cognitive disability and every single version of trauma on the internet, always - reading is off, listening to music is off... Amazing. I do wonder what's next
I wish I could understand the power Brandon’s line delivery of “Whaaat” combined with this look holds over me. Every time I rewatch I get snagged by it.
The thing about it is, I don't know which of the two should be the one to "apologize"/ try to mend the relationship.
Narratively I think it makes more sense for Blitz to do it since Stolas is currently catastrophizing/ assuming it's over for good.
But from an outsider's perspective, while they both definitely have things to apologize for I do think Stolas was slightly more in the wrong with how he went about it.
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Stealing @angelshizuka post bcuz I'm hyperfixating and talking about it helps me calm down.
Listen, with the way Full Moon ended, I know I'm going to fucking LOVE this interaction
At first I was confused as to why Stolas looked like this, but after seeing Full Moon, I can believe it. This is the face of a man who got called "A pompous rich asshole" and is SPITEFUL about it
THE LITTLE MOCK BOW AND EVERYTHING. BRO IS REALLY LEANING INTO IT
I'm so sick of angst. I'm manifesting the hate flirting in Apology Tour
Alright I'm getting on this shit because I am obsessed with Stolitz unironically. Before I start this I want to be absolutely clear that (in my opinion) there is no "right" side in the overall situation between Blitz and Stolas. Both equally have problems that contribute to their miscommunication and I can sympathise with both of them. If you disagree, feel free to ignore this post and scroll on, I don't mind friendly debate with people I know well but strangers on the internet are a different story.
I do generally project heavily onto Blitz which yeah probably impacts my interpretation of this a lot but I'm just a guy on tumblr I'm not here to be 100% right I'm just posing my take on their behaviours etc etc
Mandatory Disclaimer: spoilers start below! Do not click read more if you care about spoilers for The Full Moon episode of Helluva Boss
That all said, I'm splitting this into three parts:
Blitz's behaviour throughout the episode
Stolas' behaviour throughout the episode
Blitz and Stolas' confrontation/argument/interaction at the end of the episode
Part One: Blitz's behaviour
Starting off with "When I See Him", the basics of it (that is played up a bit for comedy and more or less directly stated really at the start) is that Blitz is obviously covering up how he really feels by concentrating entirely on the sex he anticipates having, and acting like that is what is important to him.
Are we okay? Can't really say
I'm getting by
By avoiding his questions
It's so complicated, I hate when it's complicated
Why do I always end up in situations that are complicated?
Blitz knows there is something wrong, or off, between the two of them but he'd rather not talk or communicate about it - literally preferring to avoid the topic entirely because "complicated" = bad, and he has no idea how to fix that, despite the fact that most of his relationships have been and/or are still complicated, he doesn't know how to deal with that because he never learnt. He's started to with Fizz a bit at the very least, but he's definitely not in a place to do that with romantic relationships yet - but I digress.
Here I go again, getting in my head
So I'll focus on the sexy stuff instead
Not too much to say about this part other than he is actively choosing to disregard his anxieties and worries about him and Stolas by putting on this mask of caring about the sex and nothing else. Honestly, not a surprise with Blitz, this is pretty average behaviour and is very much likely a common coping mechanism of his to avoid serious feelings when engaging in relationships of a romantic nature. Especially since he seems to place a lot of value in himself in how good he is in bed.
When I see him, I'm gonna do that thing he likes
No need to change things, I'll just bring the ropes and spikes[/spice*]
We've got a nice arrangement
And it's working out just fine
We'll keep it light
Can't wait to lose ourselves in nasty sex
And make that bird squawk
We'll just stick with what makes sense
Same as above, he's going to what's familiar and directly deciding he'd rather ignore any issues they have and not talk about them in favour of doing what they normally do on full moons and call it a night.
*my audio processing disorder really did not like that line, and I cannot completely tell if that's right - any mistakes in lyrics or other quotes from the show before or after this are almost definitely because of this so please feel free to correct me.
Moving on from the song, some things Blitz does or says during the conversation with Moxxie and Loona in the office that stick out to me.
It's the full moon, I gotta meet up with Stolas tonight. Felt like dressing up a little since it's been a few months since I've been inside his feathered ass.
This is personally really interesting to me since he's not been known to dress up explicitly to see Stolas before (excluding the posts that have been seen on the instagram accounts but I'm hesitant to count those as 100% hard canon, and they were outfits of a different variety - not a bowtie and suspenders as he's seen wearing in the episode). It's like he's trying very hard to impress him for.. some reason? I'm guessing he sees it as part of his whole plan to really sort of wow Stolas, get in there, get out, no touchy feely stuff. It comes off as the opposite to me though, it shows that he kind of values what Stolas think of him and his appearance - and that he wants to impress Stolas. This could just be him trying to prove his worth to Stolas so he doesn't get cast aside, but it could also be more.
This facial expression is very important to me. It's a split second frame of vulnerability in response to Loona saying the following:
Oh shit, he's getting bored of you.
This is genuine worry and concern on his face, he tried to cover it up with a smile but he is concerned. And yes, it could just be about losing the book, it probably is in part but I think it's more than that.
Loona also says this:
Yeah, man. If someone wants to see you less and less, big red flag. If they give you chances to ditch, they probably want out themselves. Just wanna be more passive aggressive about it, dicks.
When she says this Blitz reacts very on the defensive, repeating what she said mockingly and saying this:
How do you know, Loona?
It's a very defensive reaction and I'd bet he feels at least a little bit bruised and hurt at the thought of Stolas getting "bored" of him - which probably does not help at all with how he's struggling with how he currently feels about Stolas between the agreement for the book and not seeing him in a while.
Immediately after this interaction, he literally leaves his job (which like, yeah, he is own his boss I Guess he can do that whenever he wants but I can't imagine he does it a lot, I Hope, unless he thinks it's important) and goes shopping for more things to impress Stolas. It's a lot of effort to put into someone you don't really super care about, all things considered but let's just go with the devil's advocate here that it's not to lose the book and it doesn't really mean anything. Although I do find his choice to look at candles first interesting, assuming it's not for something else (resident sex repulsed asexual is struggling with thinking about that kind of thing - despite watching helluva boss lmao), Stolas seems to like candles. If I remember correctly, he has some near his bath.
An interesting detail for Blitz to know/remember/take into account, for someone he allegedly does not care about. Anddd that's it for Blitz's scenes in this episode.
Part 2: Stolas' Behaviour
Like with Blitz, I'm gonna focus on how Stolas acts in "When I See Him" first, then move on to what we see of him alone in the rest of the episode (which there's very little of, I think, unfortunately).
The summary of what I think of Stolas in this song is he clearly has a somewhat fairytale view of his relationship with Blitz still (which is only emphasised by how the song is disney princess like in nature), thankfully he knows he has to let him be separate from the terms of their agreement and has found a way for this to occur without horribly impacting Blitz's business. However, he (at least, at first) seems to think after this happens everything will go fine and be perfectly okay and happily ever after, or more likely hopes that is how the situation will end up - but we see more of his worries later on so he's evidently not completely deluding himself.
My derring-do is half disguised
Behind a smile
I don't have a lot to say about this just that it shows Stolas is obviously aware that Blitz is performing at least a little when he's with him.
I swore I wouldn't dwell on the divorce
This line just interests me more than anything, it's understandable that he doesn't want to think about the divorce. God knows I wouldn't want to, but's it intriguing to see he's attempting to distance himself from it - I hope we see more about this in the future episodes, maybe.
So for my own health
I'll remind myself
That when I see him
I know that it won't feel so tough
I'll believe him
And not the voice that says I'm not enough
No need for an arrangement
It can just be him and me
I'll see us free
How perfect it could be
When I see him tonight
This bit is very sweet honestly, Stolas clearly yearns to be closer to Blitz - and he's trying his best to facilitate that. He just wants genuine connection and love, something he couldn't experience in his marriage with Stella. Stolas is obviously nervous and has some self worth issues to say the least, but he deals with them differently to Blitz. In fact, he finds that being with Blitz helps combat these (likely because he feels loved and/or wanted by someone).
Unrelated to dissecting the episode and the like, the voice acting for this part was incredible and I love the way Stolas' VA (his name has slipped my mind atm) conveys emotion in his voice - even while singing. He sounds very hopeful, yet the cracks and wobbles suggest how nervous he feels for the interaction with Blitz, even if he's currently acting as if he thinks it will end well.
Oh god
I'll fucking die alone if this goes bad tonight
This bit really just kind of shows how nervous he does feel about talking with Blitz about giving him the crystal. And that he is scared it'll go wrong, it's nothing too crazy.
The detail of him having none of the medication he takes left is interesting to me though, just that he's still taking it, I guess - could suggest he's still struggling with anxiety etc etc.
Am I doing something I can't take back?
Would he want me if he was free?
And if he's only here as a prisoner
What kind of a monster does that make me
Stolas is clearly feeling a lot of guilt for his past treatment of Blitz, and fear that his feelings aren't reciprocated - but it seems like he's more scared that he's been taking advantage of Blitz, than the thought that Blitz doesn't like him.
My entire life's been written in stone
He taught me that I could choose
Blitz is the first person he really chose to meet or associate with, as a child and as an adult. There was no obligation to know him or socialise with him, or to be his friend (or more). In fact, it was discouraged if anything but Stolas chose to do it anyway - and it helped him realise he could do what he wanted, and gain the confidence to do so.
Part 3: Blitz and Stolas' confrontation
Stolas' body language here kills me, he's so nervous for what he's about to do, and despite his hopeful song early he's eerily somber - as if he knows this will end badly.
Blitz looks so afraid here, he's gone through all of this effort to try to impress Stolas and keep him from getting "bored" of him. Part of this is probably because he doesn't want to lose the connection he and Stolas have but honestly it's largely probably the fear of losing the book and his business that he's worked so hard for. Blitz is an incredibly ambitious person, and he's put a lot of blood, sweat and tears (mostly blood) into I.M.P and to have it taken away because of someone else due to not being good enough for them is probably one of his worst fears.
Blitz's immediate switch to trying to seduce Stolas is slightly jarring, but not all that surprising considering how this whole thing started. Blitz is desperate, trying anything to prove to Stolas he's worth keeping around. Meanwhile Stolas looks resigned, as if realising it really was just a performance for Blitz the entire time.
Stolas, please, I- I need this book. Please, I need this book, Stolas. I will do anything.
The immediate switch to begging, mixed with tears, took me off guard honestly. I didn't expect to see him do that but it makes sense considering how badly he treasures I.M.P and he really is just at the whim of Stolas and it could all collapse at any given moment.
I don't understand, why are you giving me this? Am I not like, fucking you good enough? Because I can- I can always do better.
This being Blitz's immediate reaction to getting the crystal from Stolas is upsetting. I was on the verge of tears here, he can't even comprehend that Stolas might genuinely want to give him a gift, not because Blitz isn't good enough, but because Stolas wants him to be independent. Blitz has never viewed himself as "good enough" for people and he puts on a lot of performances to convince himself he's worthy of being associated with others. This probably feels like, to him, a convoluted way of "getting rid" of him, instead of giving him freedom so he and Stolas can interact with less of a power imbalance.
This in an interesting roleplay, never done this one but I can get into it. How's this? Oh, Stolas, I'll stay with you, I love you soo much.
Blitz's immediate response to Stolas' confession being one of disbelief leading him into thinking it's some sort of roleplay or pretense because he can't possibly believe that anyone would actually love him is honestly worse case scenario and probably where all of this starts going downhill.
I have my answer, Blitz. You needn't say anything. I have wanted you, for so long. The fact that you couldn't believe that I might have these feelings about you, that your first instinct is that it's always about... sex. That's enough to know what this is.
This right here, is terrible. Miserable, even. Communication is starting to break down, Stolas doesn't realise or understand Blitz's point of view and I certainly cannot blame him for getting upset but how these two are communicating yet somehow falling victim to miscommunication at the same time is impressive at this point. They're both getting emotional, and it's fucking everything up but to be fair no one can remain 100% logical, this is nerve wracking and stressful for them both.
What? Fuck you, Stolas. You spring this feelings bullshit on me, are you fucking kidding? Can I get a fucking minute to think after everything you've put me through, you pompous rich asshole? Treat me like one of your little butler imps, you can't just dismiss me like that! I mean, you royal fucks think you can do this every time, like you can just play with our feelings because we're smaller and not as important! Well, I'm not letting you, bitch! Let's go!
This, this is incredibly cathartic in a weird way. It's not good by any means but for Blitz these bitter feelings have probably been somewhat simmering beneath the surface for a while and he hasn't been able to express them because of the nature of his and Stolas' relationship. The way he's phrasing this makes me wonder if he has previous experience with a royal demon doing this to him outside of now, and Stolas' father hiring him to be Stolas' friend when he was a child. It wouldn't be too unreasonable but putting that aside for a moment. The anger and lashing out here is probably a defense mechanism on his part, every time something has got vulnerable or upsetting in the past in this show Blitz always seems to get angry (an example that comes to mind at the minute is when Cash was celebrating Fizz's birthday - at the time he didn't say anything to Fizz but he stormed off, angry. Another one could be probably a few of his interactions with Verosika. I'd have to rewatch the show to find something more particular). The point is Blitz lashes out instead of being open and vulnerable, he doesn't mean or genuinely think any of this - and immediately regrets it as soon as he says it. But it's too late, it's been said.
Stolas flinches or pauses when walking a handful of times during this rant from Blitz, each time whenever he has an insult. Before he has even said anything it's immensely clear Stolas is very hurt by this.
Blitz. I think so very highly of you, I didn't realise you think so low of me.
This is the regret I was talking about, it's probably helped along by Stolas admitting he thinks highly of Blitz but god - he is crushed. And he immediately tries to apologise but Stolas teleports him out of there before he can even process it, leaving us on a terrible cliffhanger.
God, it's a fucking mess. They're a mess I'm so scared for the next episode and how they are even going to fix this. Someone get these gay demons a therapist, please, I beg.
All in all, ow my feelings, this episode hurt, I did cry. Stolitz have mastered the art of miscommunication, but that is hardly news. Blitz seems to have got a genuine wake-up call, sort of similar to how he did with Fizz and I'm hoping that kickstarts something to help him improve, because he does need to. At the same time, Stolas has kinda fucked up here, and does need to give Blitz more time to process since I imagine this is very fucking shocking to him. It's all one biggggg mess and god knows how it'll work out but I'm looking forward to finding out and hopefully not having my heart ripped out and spat on by the end of this season.
can I just say how much I love stolitz and how messy, complicated, and tragic it is
it's going to feel SO good and rewarding once they're on the same page and learn to grow (both by themselves and together) and be in a relationship- no ties no transactions. just a genuine partnership
also I commend the writers for writing a miscommunication scene that didn't feel frustrating to watch (for the wrong reasons, at least) and was actually so fucking smart and well written. I cannot wait to see how this develops the rest of the season and beyond
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I JUST REALIZED THAT WITH HIS BACK TURNED, STOLAS ISN'T SEEING BLITZ CRYING
HE ISN'T SEEING THAT BLITZ IS GETTING SO UPSET AND WORKED UP ABOUT THIS GOODBYE THAT HE'S CRYING AND BEING VULNERABLE WITH HIM FOR PROBABLY THE FIRST TIME EVER!
I think it’s important to note that the episode went out of its way, mentioning it at least twice, to establish that Stolas gave Blitzø a choice to come over or not for several months BEFORE the final confrontation and Blitzø chose not to. So while I agree that Blitzo deserved time to process he had already shown Stolas multiple times that if given an option he would not choose Stolas, so I do not agree that Stolas took Blitzo’s one misunderstanding, thinking it was a role play (or deluding himself it was) as the rejection alone, it was that on top of already soft balling the choice to Blitz for several months before that. All Blitz did was confirm it in person.
And honestly, given what we have in texts and what Stolas straight up says to him after Ozzie’s, I don’t even agree that Stolas blindsided him, or that Stolas portrayed their relationship as being only about sex up until this point. Yes, he absolutely oversold the sexual aspect based on Blitzø’s approach, he was over the top initially but he honestly toned that down by Ozzie’s and from that point onward it is all Blitzo’s refusal to look at it or listen to what he actually says. I’d argue he started that as early as Harvest Moon when he offers the trip to him. Blitz does the same thing during the entire conversation, straight up ignoring what Stolas is saying in favor of his own fears and insecurities and as a result he makes Stolas’s fears come true.
It’s just a really well done dynamic. Like the outwardly tough and brave character giving into their fears and being unable to get past them which inadvertently results in them confirming the fears of the softer, more outwardly timid character who didn’t give in to theirs and tried anyway? Brilliant.
Like Blitz is a perfect use case for this
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