coca-colas are my favorite type of dog

i want to be a mousewife and do the mousework. yes i do the cooking yes i do the squeaking etc

american psycho memes being so prevalent on here is really funny because with all due respect if some of the people on tumblr actually watched it theyd have a heart attack

*shaking box of treats in front of a vhs player* hey followers pause your mcelroy podcast for a second i have a movie to show you… it’s a horror with political commentary… and it’s funny too… yes like jennifer’s body :) yep it’s directed by a woman too… the main character is kind of a sinnamon bun like loki….

All I can think abt is that one quote that basically just describes that you can’t be your true self in your native language bc there’s too much emotional attachment, but that second languages allow speakers to be truly free with their words

I'm here today as your friendly neighbourhood biochemistry major to remind you that juice cleanses/detoxes ARE A HOAX! "Detoxing" by drinking smoothies and underconsuming necessary calories for your body function is not healthy. Your kidneys and your liver get rid of your body waste as a natural process. Do not trust brands and influencers that promote these "detox" cleanses. They are a hoax. They are creating a problem that does not exist.

That’s Doug Dimmadome

This website would be so funny in the death note universe I think some of you guys would be really pro Kira

Imagining discourse where some people are reminding you not to put your name and face on your blog to stay safe and then other people call you toxic and abusive for that bc it means you’re hiding something if you don’t want Kira to be able to kill you

green tea.. in all forms .. is the most healing thing... yk. i drink green tea and im like... wow maybe life is beautiful... im not evil anymore.. i want to build community. the earth is healing