working in retail
or, really, any service job
trying on a metaphor
Show & Tell
AnasAbdin
YOU ARE THE REASON
One Nice Bug Per Day

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Jules of Nature

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ā
Sweet Seals For You, Always

Discoholic šŖ©
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
I'd rather be in outer space šø
Keni
Three Goblin Art
Monterey Bay Aquarium
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sheepfilms
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@experiment358-2
working in retail
or, really, any service job

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louder for the creepers in the back
Compromised.
Itās been a good run yāall. But ya resident monster has been found out. Gotta blast and need new url ideaz
bubbles for my troubles
but wait... fuck who do i drunk call now??

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canāt help falling in love on a kalimba
This radiates calm
mmm borger
made perfect borger, iz good
Gaudās Juicy Fuck*ng Borger Recipe
use hands to mix in bowl:
1lb ground beef
1/3 cup (panko) breadcrumbs
1 beaten egg
1 tbsp the worchestshire sauce
1 tbsp minced garcliĀ Ā
1 tbsp milk/cream
salt
round each patty into beautiful spheres. flatten slightly, like you changed your mind last minute. pan grill medium-high until however long feels right
i topped mine w/ blackberry preserves, goats cheese, chipotle mayo, & avocado. next will be experimenting w/ hot pepper jelly. also where the heck can i buy brioche buns, theyāre harder to find than mythical pokemon
You surprise me so much sometimes. You can cook really well and write really well. What else are you good at?
no thatās it. those are the 2 things
This is the /an/ post that keeps on giving.
YES
YES
YEESSSSSSS
song of the day, one of the best in the game rn my opinion
moodĀ

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all i been on for a whole month
Me: Iām going to be SO productive today
Also me: *dissociates for five hours*
The most hilarious thing about the fact Buckbeak had a trial and lost is that later on JKR resolves the issue by having Hagrid take him in again and renaming him Witherwings. Thatās literally all it took. What if in POA, Hagrid simply said,Ā āSorry, Buckbeak flew away.āĀ
āThereās a hippogriff right there, Hagrid.ā
āA different hipprogriff.ā
āIām⦠pretty sure thatās the same hipprogriff.ā
āProve it.āĀ
no dna tests we die like scientifically underdeveloped societies
Prisoner of Azkaban continues to be the most frustrating book
Someone should have just adopted Sirius and started calling him Gerald.
Remus: Erm⦠this is our new order member, my⦠cousin Gerald. Gerald White.
āMr. Lupin that is Sirius Black with glasses!ā āOh come now Minister, Sirius Black doesnāt wear glasses. That wouldnāt make sense.ā āWell have Mr. White take off his glasses then!ā āHe canāt he needs them to see.ā
it got better
Kingdom Hearts characters as things Iāve heard at the first week of each of my high school years
Vanitas: sorry, but in case you havenāt noticed, iāve been an asshole for 4 years. it took you 4 years to notice. so, whoās the REAL asshole now?!
Xehanort: i realize we donāt have air conditioning. believe me, it is not a plot to kill you all, no matter what anyone else says. *shifty eye glance at the computer on his desk*
Xion: i snuck a cat in my hoodie, help me get off campus to protect him, his name is elvis *soft meow from the hoodie*
Kairi: Iād willingly give everyone a hug, since I know a lot of us need one, but Iām afraid one of you would stab me in the back if I tried, so Iāll refrain from doing it. (a student said this)
Riku: Not to be gay, but I love Sora. No homo though. *proceeds to hug Sora and says how much he loves him*
Riku: *sees Sora while walking around during lunch later in the day* FUCK IT, IM GAY
Roxas: yall just wanna be the same forever but sometimes, a fucker needs to EVOLVE. come on, stop pressing the b button whenever i get close. i wanna be DRAGONITE! NOW!!
Namine: *starting a drawing* alright i got this
Namine: *drops her pencil and holds her head in her hands* why did i draw the okay hand emoji
Aqua: *is asked whoās the oldest in her group of friends, she raises her hand and says sheās a senior, gets declared the group mom* okay but im not responsible for any dumb shit yall do, my expertise is bad jokes and moral support
Sora: *squinting eyes at the early 2000ā²s TV across the classroom, tryna take notes on the crappy school laptops* guy whereās the google button
Terra: *talking to his entire math class* last year, you guys may have noticed a substantial drop in all your grades. well, that was my fault, i got 105% on the final and i fuckin aced it. howās it feel (iāll be honest, this one was told to me, i have no idea if it actually happened like that, but itās pretty believable)
Ventus: whoās birthday is when and what is your favourite video game. i need to be prepared for this shit.
Axel: *notices anyone that looks remotely gay* HEY, YOU! YOU LOOK GAY, WANNA HANG OUT WITH US?
Saix: *watching Axel call to the gay people and silently drinks his water bottle* this is the guy i chose, huh
Rikuplica: *that one person that had to check their twinās facebook profile to check what their favourite band was so the icebreaker activity could continue*
Larxene: I know Iām a bitch, but at least I watch something BESIDES Keeping up with the Kardashiansā¦. Yeah, thatās right. I WATCH ONCE UPON A TIME.
Marluxia: i like⦠really wanna make a club. but not a club with a purpose, just a really big club. weāll be small at first, but weāll slowly draft in members. itās a club that does nothing, there isnāt exactly a reason to AVOID the club. your friend will join it and then so will you cause i mean, why not join this club. one day ill call a meeting and everyone in school will be there. and ill say one word thatāll send everyone running over those chain-link fences⦠āSCATTER!ā
Luxord: im not supposed to gamble for anything, no matter my odds⦠but damn it those silly bands look cooooool
Demyx: *loud trumpet noises coming from the band room* WE! ARE THE CRYSTAL GEMS! *trombone noise* WEāLL ALWAYS SAVE THE DAY! *cymbal crash*
Vexen: so everyone in here knows how a gas lit flame works right? and how to handle the safety? no one? alright kids, light your matches and put your goggles on, science is about to go down and it has a high percentage chance of burning us alive
Zexion: OKAY, I KNOW POKEMON IS A WAY MORE POPULAR FRANCHISE BUT DID THE CREATORS OF YU-GI-OH SERIOUSLY MISS OUT ON THAT MOBILE SEARCHING DEVICE TREND. COME ON, YU-GI-GO IS THE BEST FUCKIN NAME EVER WHY DO I LIVE IN THIS SOCIETY
Lexaues: my name is lexaues, and i play varsity footballā¦. *waits for someone to comment but inevitably no one replies* VARSITY FOOTBA- (im pretty sure this was just a vine quote but i overheard it and snickered)
Xaldin: if i had a knife for every time i wanted to kill myself, im pretty sure i wouldve done it right then and there, like seriously thank god knives dont just spawn when i get suicidal, can you imagine-
Xigbar: why the fuck did they announce ācinnamon rolls in the cafeteria but only for the teachers and staffā like do they not realize that im going to march through hell to get to those rolls, fuckin idiots
Ansem: *the principal trying to read announcements to the school over the comms and a kid yells āFUCKā in the background*
Women: I would prefer to be with a man who doesnāt abuse me, isnāt an addict, doesnāt cheat, bathes Journalist: WHAT A BRUTAL LIST OF DEMANDS
the bar is set so damn low
Oh yeah lol this is an accurate portrayal of the majority of womenās expectations

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Ever just stop talking to people to see who gives a shit if you exist? Results are upsetting but not at all shocking
Well fuck am I lonely.
Being by meself sucks a lot more without wheed