pov: this is my main

I want what Jon Archivist has

A hot, loving boyfriend and inexplicable instant chemistry with every goth that I meet

Good evening girl I'm infodumping

Help girl I'm self conscious

forming your own opinion is stupid you should never do it and you should only trust the catholic church

i wish i was a strawberry and not a person goodnight

catholic (derogatory)

in a few days a poor lawyer will be forced to remain serious while using this post as evidence in court

FUCK conversation starters, we only use conversation STOPPERS in this house! “Oh hi, how was your day?” “I’d peg Michael Myers.” BOOM! Conversation, dead in a flash!

supernatural really buried their gays so deep they sent them to super hell

no wait this is the most alive ive felt in months someone announce something else batshit lets keep this shit train going what im feeling is not serotonin but BOY is it getting my blood pumping

LISTEN I ONLY DO UNETHICAL MAGIC IF ITS REALLY FUNNY

Bitches be like “you can’t keep casting penis explosion on people you don’t like” as if it’s not hilarious

Holy fuck

goth girl cock

you know what? goth boy pussy.

at your wifes house rn😏 she hitting me with a broom