alex

jacob anderson talking about louis: he is me i am him there is no separation

sam reid talking about lestat: that is my close personal friend lestat and i am also his lawyer providing his professional statements on the events taking place

assad zaman talking about armand: every time i get on set i get possessed for a few hours and wake up in my dressing room. also he’s a freak and wants that young old man bad

the fact that we got reverse-queerbaited and there was levitating gay vampire sex in episode 1 and then never again :(

"he ain't white he french!"

lestat showing up to louis' family dinner in the gayest outfit he could wear in 1910, pretending to eat, and hypnotizing paul when he really was trying to make a good impression

florence du lac clocking louis as gay because of his acrylic nails and tinted glasses

"what's wrong with that man?" @ lestat

louis with the "no whites allowed" sign despite lestat being inside the building

"i'm not sure how i feel about that pleated skirt" "it's chiffon it has movement"

grace calling lestat louis' white daddy

louis, lestat, and claudia treating nosferatu like a comedy

louis telling the police they should be ashamed of how they treated "law-abiding, taxpaying citizens" and forgetting that it's illegal to be gay

"we sell...incinerators. to various american cities." "we bring our clients here to demonstrate the product"

louis throwing lestat's coffin out the window

tom anderson not seeing louis and lestat for 17 years but for some reason he has a picture with them in his desk drawer

the fact that rashid was not just a character armand made up but a real employee of theres who was mysteriously absent for a week while seemingly consensually being played by his boss

armand and louis walking up to daniel holding hands like two people who have never held hands before in their life

armand had a threesome with a father and son while watching now, voyager, something louis didn't even know about

armand telling daniel his own armandstat fanfiction, stopping at the scene where they fucked in the theatre box, and daniel wanting more

"are you schizophrenic louis?" "...no"

the insinuation that the real irish playwright samuel barclay beckett was a vampire. not only that, but that his most well-known work, "waiting for godot," was originally written for the theatre des vampires. not only that, but that he is now an unspecified DJ

french man yelling at louis and armand that they should blow each other when they're kissing in the public park

daniel molloy being so unbelievably gay in the 1970s and being immediately into fucking louis in the coffin

daniel molloy having his body comandeered by armand and still offering to suck his dick

daniel molloy trying to escape from armand and immediately running into the wall

armand walking back into the dubai penthouse being the silliest he's ever been, nourished, happy only to find out that his husband and weird gay boy situationship have unionized

armand gaslighting his way out of the situation he gaslit himself into by telling louis he asked him to erase his memories

armand animating the raccoon into the projections during the trial

santiago small dick reveal

lestat still wearing a 150 year old leyendecker robe and playing a wooden piano, but somehow having the money for an ipad, speakers, and wifi

"jon made the choice to go after live statements because they felt good" is true

"jon felt good when he took live statements as a metaphor for addiction" is true

"jon felt good when he took live statements because victimizing people feels empowering" is true

"jon felt good when he took live statements Because Eating Feels Good" Is Also True

it's easy to say that jon made The Choice to continue being a monster, there's plenty of characters in the show who've said as much.

but the choice to continue being a monster is Equally the choice to Survive, to continue living. and trying to have a conversation about the Morality of jon's choice, as if it is Only about how good it feels to be monstrous, as if the addiction to living can be separated from the reality of dying. is a bit ridiculous !

the whole point of jon's situation, of Being an avatar, is that it's not Fair. jon was turned into a monster without his knowledge or consent, and then was told that there was no way out of it but to die.

it's not Fair to blame someone for wanting to live, it's not Fair to hurt someone to continue living. both are true, and that's Exactly what makes it interesting ! Why avatars can be both victims and victimizers in turn.

what makes someone like jon different from someone like jared hopsworth isn't their capacity for violence or to cause pain, it's the Choice To Continue Feeling Compassion For Other People. to make the active Choice to see other human beings As People and care about the harm you cause them.

so much of the narrative of tma is about characters who are stripped of agency, who still make Meaningful Choices Anyways. by Choosing to care, even as that choice hurts you. to continue to care even though it would feel Good not to.

in mag 121, he makes a point of calling jon "jon" over "the archivist" because he says "archivist" is too formal, and in mag 168 he refers directly to jon two times. the first is at the top of his coroner's report, where he denotes it as being addressed to "the great eye" and "its archive, which draws knowledge of this suffering unto itself," referring to jon both with the more dehumanizing of his avatar titles and with an "it" pronoun. the second time is towards the end, where he calls jon "jon" and expresses that he isn't asking for mercy and that he would have offered this report willingly if that were still an option.