not the fact that i forget my laundry in the washer because the stairs are too long, not because i give him the side eye when he makes buldak noodles with out me (yes domestic simon) and then eat all of it when he turns his back, and most certainly not bc i love his cologne i keep using it instead of the 5009 bottles he gave me

but the same fuckin shit. same thing playing on the tv on blast just for me to scroll on my phone reading fics about him

bc i love vanilla scents. with all my heart, i love a good brown sugary, sandalwood and earth scent.

and simon goes and buys this cologne. when ik the name ill tag it but GODD does it smell ferally good. especially when i ovulate i just know this freak of a man purposely sprays it all over his faded clothes.

then one. in my face.

not the fact that i forget my laundry in the washer because the stairs are too long, not because i give him the side eye when he makes buldak noodles with out me (yes domestic simon) and then eat all of it when he turns his back, and most certainly not bc i love his cologne i keep using it instead of the 5009 bottles he gave me

but the same fuckin shit. same thing playing on the tv on blast just for me to scroll on my phone reading fics about him

bc i love vanilla scents. with all my heart, i love a good brown sugary, sandalwood and earth scent.

and simon goes and buys this cologne. when ik the name ill tag it but GODD does it smell ferally good. especially when i ovulate i just know this freak of a man purposely sprays it all over his faded clothes.

then one. in my face.

not the fact that i forget my laundry in the washer because the stairs are too long, not because i give him the side eye when he makes buldak noodles with out me (yes domestic simon) and then eat all of it when he turns his back, and most certainly not bc i love his cologne i keep using it instead of the 5009 bottles he gave me

but the same fuckin shit. same thing playing on the tv on blast just for me to scroll on my phone reading fics about him

bc i love vanilla scents. with all my heart, i love a good brown sugary, sandalwood and earth scent.

and simon goes and buys this cologne. when ik the name ill tag it but GODD does it smell ferally good. especially when i ovulate i just know this freak of a man purposely sprays it all over his faded clothes.

then one. in my face.

not the fact that i forget my laundry in the washer because the stairs are too long, not because i give him the side eye when he makes buldak noodles with out me (yes domestic simon) and then eat all of it when he turns his back, and most certainly not bc i love his cologne i keep using it instead of the 5009 bottles he gave me

but the same fuckin shit. same thing playing on the tv on blast just for me to scroll on my phone reading fics about him

does simon prefer boxers or briefs

the man wears neither.

but boxer briefs

Johnny, palms his bulge: “I’ve got a Loch Ness Monster right here for ya.”