Darlin’

lidl trek math is like "2nd page gc rider + 2nd page gc rider + 2nd page gc rider + 2nd page gc rider = grand tour wins☺️" when really they're just writing a recipe for spontaneous team combustion

getting obsessed with a real life guy who sucks is the ultimate cure for all ails

is-this-jonas-enriched is just like. is he currently holding his call-home phone? is he currently gripping his teammates within an inch of their lives? does he currently have access to a tall mountain followed by a crazy descent? does he look a little bit like he might cry?

CYKLING ER DANSK RAAAAAAAAAH

rpf isn’t enough i need a sex tape

(remembers that the magic lies within mine and my friends’ imaginations) I have no need of material objects

(remembers one sexual encounter does not define the entire sexual dynamic of a relationship) i need several dozen sex tapes

g2 lack-of-punch off

CYKLING ER DANSK RAAAAAAAAAH

ok but what you dont understand is that im a hypocrite so that when pogi dominates a whole gt and his team effortlessly shreds the peloton and he goes for multiple stagewins despite a great lead, that's boring, but when jonas does it, it's actually nice and fun. it feels very nice to know you get to see someone you cheer for winning :]

jai. jai hindley listen to me. your giulio has lost 18 minutes and 19 places in GC. you need to give him his luck back. you need to let him kiss you on the mouth.

somewhere in sierra nevada matteo saw jonas winning in pink and got hard so fast he got dizzy

the cut from christen about to be caught throwing peace signs back at the peloton to cicco raging throwing his bottle at his swanny just fucking killed me