look at me returning to tumblr like the fool i am

doctor sleepy just prescribed me with 5 more minutes

Every year I watch that white boy go, with no way of warning him. No way of letting him know. Helplessly watching him devour his paprika chicken before journeying the road to his doom. Don’t go, white boy. Don’t go.

romeo and juliet but one of them is from allston and the other is from brookline

Official Post of Massachusetts

we take stuffed animals very seriously in this house

17776 day of immortality + project hail mary + artemis ii is a crazy cocktail. drunk af off of the wonders of space and humanity’s unending will

I’m not avoiding my destiny I just had to lie down

we need a ritual where you can climb into a hole in the ground for roughly 24 hours and just close your eyes and not do anything, and nobody is allowed to look for you or speak your name, and whenever you want to reemerge then you can climb back out and people are forbidden from commenting on your absence. can someone get on this.

anything a man can do a butch can do better

i can always relate to a girl who wants to leave

Hand soap and moisturizer locked in an epic winter-long battle over the desertification of the hands.

i am not a religious person…….. but if you’re out there, giant rat that makes all of the rules,

i get all the star trek girlies. i get it now. im watching the original series for the first time, and the heavens above me literally just opened up. it was crazy. mr. spock beamed down and told me he's the greatest character ever made. did this happen to anyone else. im sorry i ever doubted your vision guys he's the best

Believe me, it's happened to a lot of us. :)

Mrs. Columbo picks up her husband’s freshly-pressed suit from the dry cleaner and then throws it on the ground and stomps on it, to get it just the way he likes it