i re-teach my brain this every day
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@emilyeye
i re-teach my brain this every day

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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hey man I found a piece of your soul stuck in the text messages of old friends you don’t speak to anymore. do you want it back
i will die without routine. also this routine is killing me
ROUTINE DRAGS ME ALONG BUT I WOULDN'T MOVE WITHOUT IT
If you are an Anxiety stan/simp/defender reblog this
So play like a noob? got it
You’re joking, but it actually is a popular theory in chess that a complete noob potentially can beat a master by confusing them - as the noob doesn’t know what they’re doing the master is unable to recognize which of valid strategies they’re pursuing and cannot deploy proper counterstrategy.
Chessmasters when their opponent doesn’t make one of the five approved optimal opening moves:

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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My aesthetic: when you take off your glasses on a highway and all the lights go soft and smudged, a trail of amber behind you like a quiet afterthought
My aesthetic: keeping my own glasses on so I can see the road and not die
Im so sorry youve been trapped in the passenger seat all these years Yellow.
GOD PLEASE LET ME OUT I MISS MY FAMILY
😭😭 I love piggies so much
So all that time my mom said “your room is a pigsty” she was complimenting me
I thought everyone would appreciate knowing there was an update cause someone sent her a bouquet to decorate her place 🥺
she let the baby stay in there the whole night and decided to check in the morning lmao
i was with my mother’s family and they were talking to me about my religious studies major. my great aunt asked me what the definition of hell was, and i responded “well i suppose it depends on who you ask.” and nearly all the protestants in the group decided that hell was “the absence of god” which i suppose is a fair answer, albeit not a universal one. my cousin’s wife was playing with her 3-year-old daughter and she says “well mommy says that hell is a mcdonald’s playplace” asdfghjhgfd
this 3-year-old girl is so fucking hilarious. her mothers have signed her up for a toddler yoga class, and so she has adopted a very unique language. this child also has an imaginary friend named “mom” which is, in her mind, the boss of her two mothers. for example, my cousin’s wife explained to me how her daughter got mad at them one time. the little girl situated herself in the corner of her crib, pretended to type on a cell phone and said “im writing an email to mom right now and telling her how bad you two are. namaste.”
the family’s Big Theory about “Mom” is that both my cousin and her wife are referred to as “Mommy” and “Mama.” The nickname “Mom” is not used in the house because it would just be confusing. However, when interacting with the world, people tell their daughter that they will “tell her mom” if she is doing something wrong. so this child automatically assumes there is this greater “Mom” figure that is responsible for distributing universal justice.
To be fair to the toddler, that’s pretty much how religions get started.
Our Mom, who art gonna hear about this,
i don’t want to be rich i don’t want to be famous i don’t want a million tiktok followers or what the fuck ever i just want a one bedroom apartment in a walkable community with neighbors i could borrow sugar from or bring cookies to when i bake extra and a job that i enjoy and that helps someone and pays me enough to afford my silly little one bedroom and groceries and something fun too at the end of the day and enough free time to sing and dance and read and write and spend time with the people i love and maybe have a dog and some plants to water and a shelf of books to read and a thrift store where i can buy weird clothes and faded denim jackets like i am not asking for anything big or grand or exciting i just want peace i want contentment i want just a little love how the fuck is this too much to ask for

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wow millennials are glued to their i-phones and laptops so much they cant even be bothered robbing in person anymore!!! maybe these trust fund babies should stop phishing credit cards while sitting on their butts and go out there and put some elbow grease into their thievery!
I know exactly what happened. Because it happened to me.
I trained for years to be a con artist. I told my friends and family that I wanted to be a magician, but that was just a cover for why I was constantly practicing sleight of hand.
In junior high and high school, I would shop lift a bunch of candy on my way to school, sell it to kids at the morning break, and use that money to run a crooked poker game at lunch.
Finally, when I was 19 or 20, I felt I was ready, and I picked my first pocket. I was on the bus, bumped a guy as I passed down the aisle, got his wallet, super clean.
In the wallet was several hundred dollars. A huge first score, I had been hoping for a couple twenties. I sat there looking at the, like, 400 bucks, thinking.
That was my rent at the time. We were both on the bus. It was likely his rent too. Lord knows the only reason to carry that much cash on the bus is you’re on your way to pay a bill. We were both on the bus, you know? That’s not someone I was comfortable stealing from.
I tapped him on the shoulder and told him “hey i think you dropped this” and gave it back to him with all the money still in it. It was the first and last time I ever picked a pocket.
Picking a rich person’s pocket is a loosing game. They probably have credit cards and not cash, those credit cards probably have the best anti-theft measures their bank can provide, and you probably can’t get close enough to those people to pick their pockets unless you’re already rich yourself.
The people who’s pockets you can reliably pick are the people around you. The people who are also on the bus, who are in this same shitty situation with you.
As wealth inequality becomes more drastic picking pockets has very clearly become “stealing from other poor people” and it’s not satisfying. I want to steal from Google and Apple and Fox and Facebook and General Mills and Hershey and Tesla. Not the person next to me.
Wow. This post went from funny to a life lesson in a way I wasn’t expecting, amd I’m not sorey at all.
See, unlike the capitalist elite, common criminals have a sense of morality and empathy.
We ❤️ short kings here

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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For people with anxiety about filing taxes, here’s what things that happen when you make a mistake on your tax return:
- it gets corrected
- you get a letter in the mail either asking for some additional information or a letter showing the adjustment
- you pay the amount (there’s options for payment plans too!) or get a refund
Things that do not happen
- you’re “in trouble”
- you are charged with fraud
- you go to jail
I know that most people are probably just joking/exaggerating when they say a mistake on their return means they get thrown in jail but when I worked with the public I always would encounter people who believed that would happen and they would be panicking about it. So I like to put this out there every year because if I can even prevent one person from feeling that way, it’s worth it
Annual reblog of this important information.
The thingy above where you sign your tax form says that you’ve filled it out to the best of your ability. “Sir, I am a dumbass” is 100% a valid defense
AITA for not wanting my soulmate to sleep with other men?
I (450M) suggested to my wife (43M) that we open the marriage. I’m not monogamous by nature, and after 400 years of life, anyone would need some variety. I like variety. I love my spouse of course he is the most gorgeous creature I’ve ever seen and he makes me feel needed. He was initially hesitant about opening up the marriage, but I convinced him, in large part bc I was already sleeping with another woman. I didn’t expect him to see anyone else (he’s a gay man and we live in a very conservative area) but earlier this evening he had a sexual encounter with an old school friend. I was furious and, I admit, I have a temper at times. But I kept my dalliances purely physical and I expect the same—I would never disrespect him by sleeping with an old flame of mine. He says I overreacted and that I’m a hypocritical patriarchal asshole, but I’m not sure I agree. We tried and it didn’t work out. Am I the asshole for wanting to close the marriage again?
mardiyass75 🏅 ⬆️ 103939482 ⬇️ -2349
Why is the age gap so big? YTA just for preying on younger ppl and major yikes with “I love him bc he needs me” typical groomer lmaoooo
Tatesbugattis ⬇️ -2828372837273728282
NTA everyone has a role in the relationship. Kinda weird that you’re both queers but if his role is wife then he probably has a more feminine nature and women don’t need sex as much as men do. It would be much worse for you. If he’s not satisfying your needs then u gotta do what u gotta do
———> froggyvi
———> Of course ur a misogynist pig LMAOOOO
———> girderburneer
———> Dude maybe u should spend less time riding dick on the internet and more time trying to feel the touch of a woman
Tooldforthis
YTA. OP, you ARE being a hypocritical asshole. If you’re not monogamous then maybe you should have comminuted that to your partner before cheating on him. Now that he’s reciprocated, your fragile male ego can’t handle it. Treat others as you want to be treated applies even if you’re not religious. He should dump you
———> I didn’t cheat on him… there was no emotional attachment it was just sex. He was in love with this guy
Frackingrupaul
Whoa lots to unpack here first of all you’re a predator and a piece of shit. Wait actually maybe that’s all I need to say. YTA I hope he leaves your sorry ass 😂😂 you give bi ppl a terrible rep I seriously think you just set us back 50 years
Tradwifebabygirl
I understand your hurt but I think you should’ve communicated better with him in the first place. It’s true that some men just need it more but if u told him before sleeping with the other woman then maybe he would understand better. My bf and I have an open relationship and even though I’m not attracted to anyone other than him he was honest and clear with me about being poly early on in our relationship and so I could respect it. Your not the ah for being poly, YTA for lying
777angeldeath
Didn’t read past the ages. YTA
Armandeusmozart
Kill yourself
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