kinda like a modern prometheus idk

i love turning off lights. no need for all that

tubi has gay movies that not a single person has ever heard of

I’m 400 years old and still on tumblr

Every day on the online people are trying to convince you of stuff by sending you links to substack or medium dot com or to a YouTube essay or to something some guy on Reddit said or to a tarot card or a bird’s entrails or the New York Times

theyre going to shoot me out back tomorrow and i will enjoy it

I've posted about this before but back home at my old job I used to get pho so fucking often that the owners of the place stopped asking me what I wanted and stopped handing me menus when I walked in. After I moved to NY and I could only go back to Chicago like once a year, I sat down and they gave me a menu and I was like "Oh no I already know what I want, can I get--" and they were like OHHH #36 WITH EXTRA NOODLES YOU'RE BACK and I almost cried

Yaaaawn! Call me when they're covered in blood and having gay sex

re: qifrey's hair turning white. i think its funny to imagine it's naturally black like his eybrows and would start growing back that way if he ever managed to decurse himself. but i also like to think he starts immediately Magic Bleaching his roots(hah) as soon as they grow in because not only does he think it would look bad he also feels kind of cringe for how badly he does not want to ever have to find that out OR let anyone know how badly it bothers him. and this is the new dark secret he cares as a burden for the rest of his life because at this point he just kind of needs one of those to function properly.

this year’s prom theme is… *opens envelope* Great Lakes Invasive Species And What Boaters Can Do To Stop Them

And the subject of tonight’s ecology panel is *turns on powerpoint* Enchantment Under the Sea

craziest thing in the world is how many restaurants have started not including fries or any side whatsoever with their burgers meanwhile the burgers cost the downpayment on a new car. you want $19 for a fucking sandwich and you aint gonna give me even a scoop of coleslaw on the side? you’ve truly lost your fucking mind. i’m filing a class action lawsuit atp

im a fake fan of everything i like because i cant remember anything

must feel so good to be soil absorbing rain