#1 Heterosexual Propagandaist

“Wilhelm, I’m not a jealous person!”

“Swan, I know you!”

“Yet, you're laughing at me! You’re laughing at your pregnant wife!”

“Bela, I am laughing at the idea that another woman is attracted to me!”

“Well, that’s because she is,” Belladonna scoffs, looking out the car window, “I swear if the women that we hire are not either married, or—”

“Belladonna!” He laughs.

“It’s true! There have only been a handful of women that have worked for us that were single and didn’t try to steal you away!” Belladonna sneers, “I know you believe that you are not someone that people fawn over, but you are! Men and women, hell, anyone, would love it if I were to not exist.”

Wilhelm chuckles, “I’m not going to be stolen, swan! We have been married 105 years, we are having another child together!” he replies, chuckling, “I am not going anywhere. Nor do I want to be anywhere else!”

“Well, of course you're not going anywhere,” Belladonna giggles, “I know that, but the world doesn’t know that. The world thinks you are a man who would do anything to get away from a very pregnant wife.”

“Well, the world clearly is unaware of my breeding and possible pregnancy kink,” Wilhelm comments as they pull into the back parking lot of their funeral home.

Belladonna laughs, “Right, because this is all a kink.”

“If only we weren’t vampires,” Wilhelm sighs jokingly before getting out of the car to open her passenger door, “We would have so many children.”

She squeezes his hand as she gets out of their car, “Beloved, your breeding kink is showing.”

“No, I simply love my wife very much,” he remarks with a shit-eating grin across his face as he kisses her cheek, "That more then a lot of people can say."

He gets Belladonna settled in his office before getting to work. Checking on her every so often, having the most mundane conversation with him, just the way he likes it.

"Mr. Con Vester?" The woman that Belladonna had complained about early that morning pokes her head into the office, interrupting a conversation he and Belladonna were having, "I need some assistance in the family room."

"Of course, Narcisa," Wilhelm mutters, before He stands from sitting on the edge of his desk and places a kiss on Belladonna’s temple.

Narcisa hears him remark something about Belladonna picking out a crib before he approaches her. "Lead the way," he replies with a kind smile.

He is led to the family room, a piece of art that normally hangs on the wall is leaning against it, "I was just dusting the shelve and the painting fell and… I'm too short to put it back into place."

Wilhelm let out a small chuckle before turning his attention to having the painting back on the wall.

"Have you ever thought about changing this rooms decor?" Narcisa asks.

"I have not."

"It just feels so empty."

"It is place were family's can grieve in peace when and if they need to. It's not about how full or pretty it looks," Wilhelm replies, "Belladonna did a wonderful job create a space that is comforting and peace for those that wish for a private moment away from chaos and people that are present at a visitation or the actual funeral."

"Right," Narcisa mutters, even when he isn't looking at her, Wilhelm can tell that the mention of Belladonna does not make her happy, "But one day the things in here will be dated, if not the art or the style of furniture, the color of the walls or the curtains."

Wilhelm shrugs, stepping back to assess whether the painting he has rehung on the wall is straight. "Then Belladonna will redecorate," he mutters. "Curtains and paint is not an extreme expense."

Narcisa hums as Wilhelm passes by her to exit the room, "How long have you two been married again?"

"Over a hundred years."

"Do you ever get tired of her?" Narcisa asks, "Being married that long, do you ever think about being with someone else?"

There is malice behind her questions, he can tell. Belladonna is right, this woman wishes his wife were not around, wishes she were in Belladonna’s place. He will never understand why people are attracted to him! Belladonna has said it is because he is handsome, easy to talk to, and above all else, friendly and kind. However, if Bela were not Mrs. Con Vester, there would be no kind and considerate, friendly Wilhelm. He wouldn't even be anywhere where anyone could see him to be attracted to him.

"Ha! No," he chuckles, "I have never been tired of her, she's mine for eternity just as I am hers."

They stop in the main area of the funeral, which is empty. Narcisa stands close to him as he looks down at her.

"You have never thought of someone younger?" She asks quietly before her fingers grace his bare forearm.

His whole body is filled with disgust. He forbids his face from contorting into an expression of complete nauseated disgust, only frowning down at her when her finger lingers on his skin.

"Someone young to give you everything you could ever want?" Narcisa asks.

Wilhelm can't stop himself from clicking his tongue on the roof of his mouth. He pulls his arm away from her touch. Mouth open, ready to speak. "Beloved!"

Every single crass word he had ready to level at Narcisa vanishes when Belladonna calls for him. She sounds excited, "Yes, my Bela? " He gazes at her, greeted by a gorgeous smile and a face full of delight.

"He's kicking," she answers as he closes the distance between them. "I thought you'd want to feel."

Wilhelm smiles, placing a hand on her bump, feeling the little flutters of his son moving around. "Hi Rudolph," he murmurs.

Belladonna smiles up at him. "Don't cry," she mutters, seeing tears welling in his eyes. Taking his unoccupied hand and gave it a squeeze. He gives her a small nod, a tell that he is trying his best not to. Narcisa is completely forgotten about; Belladonna is his main focus now, his whole world.

Arriving home that afternoon, Wilhelm sits in the living room, looking through resumes, while Belladonna sits on the floor playing with Margo and Odette, building towers with blocks.

"What if I ask Simon to work that funeral home for a bit, instead of feeling like I am being discriminatory towards a whole group of people!" Wilhelm sighs.

Belladonna giggles, "It would keep things in the family."

"It would solve the problem of being flirted with my employees."

"You'll just being working with your son, who does enjoy teasing you," Belladonna retorts.

Wilhelm sighs again, sliding onto the floor and pulling Margo into his lap so she gets closer to the blocks, "You would think that hearing we've been married over a hundred years would make people realize that I am more than happy to stay married to you."

Belladonna chuckles, "They all believe that you are a man that needs to be saved from being married to the same person for the rest of eternity."

"I, a very young individual, must save Mr. Con Vester!" she added with a fake quailty to her voice.