I love "how do you do math?" questions. Here's how my brain does it:
How about you guys?
20+40=60
60+8=68
Take 2 from 7 to make it 70
5 left.
75

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@elevenfeathers
I love "how do you do math?" questions. Here's how my brain does it:
How about you guys?
20+40=60
60+8=68
Take 2 from 7 to make it 70
5 left.
75

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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on all levels except physical i am asleep rn
My boss’s first language isn’t English. However, she loves giving inspirational speeches to everyone. I think today she was trying to tell us “don’t just stand around looking pretty”, but what she actually said was “WE DONT HAVE TIME TO BE SEXY”.
It reminds me of my Russian boss at the bakery. I didn’t wrap the bread correctly so she told me to “Snuggle like baby. Bread is your baby, Shelly. It’s sweet and gentle. Fragile, Italian.”

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In holland when someone doesn’t close the door behind their backs we say ‘Ben je in de kerk geboren?’ which literally translates to ‘Have you been born in church?’ @useless-netherlandsfacts
In the United States we say, “Were you raised in a barn?” It’s supposed to imply that the person was raised without any manners. But as people who frequently use barns have told me, you would never leave the barn door open because then the animals could get out.
In Italy when someone walks in a room and doesn’t close the door we say “abiti al Colosseo?” (and other variants), which translates to “do you live at the Colosseum?” because the Colosseum hasn’t got doors
In Bulgaria we say ‘Da ne jiveesh v peshtera?’ and it translates as ‘Do you live in a cave?’ and it both implies you were raised mannerless like in the stone ages and that you don’t use use doors b/c caves don’t have any
In my house we say, “What the fuck, dude?” because I live alone and when a door is opened by someone who isn’t me, it’s usually my cat slamming his face into it at maximum velocity before disappearing into the next room.
in sweden we say ”har du en pinne i röven?” which translates to ”do you have a stick in your ass?” because that would physically prevent you from closing the door behind you - yes our language is beautiful thank you for noticing
In Lithuanian we say "gimei autobuse?" which means "were you born on a bus?" because bus doors close by themselves
me when i get my student loan
this is the money cat. reblog in 30 seconds and you will find yourself with more wealth
#this is the only money cat i will reblog because it’s actually doing the manekineko pose151,646 notes (via lolwhutninja)
OMG YOU’RE RIGHT
and it has its right paw up! the correct paw for this. and from the markings on its ears, it looks like it might be a calico cat. which is the luckiest kind!
extremely lucky cat
I don’t even care if it actually works, I’m mostly reblogging because it’s freaking adorable.
cute cat and need money, good post, 10/10
in case anyones interested in the other versions
http://www.namaii.com/manekineko/maneki-neko-types.html
Y’know I reblogged this a bit ago and was saved from financial probation and getting kicked out of school because of it, just mere months from graduation. Got a call from the financial aid advisor telling me that they made a mistake with filing my account (or some other sort of clerical error) and said that, basically, they owe me money. Welp.
Last time I reblogged the money cat, I won two $100 gift cards at work.
Save me, money cat
time to make a fucking POST babes
SWEsvbubimm0mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm0,p-//////////////////////////////////lllllllllllll;uy nubvgjtnjk7ynnm,-p,———–pppopppppppppppppppppp..lplo0
For years I thought that the phrase "the coast is clear" is actually "the ghost is clear" and I never understood it

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No hair dye strand test we dye like men
people who leave their phones set to military time are fuckin war criminals how do you look at 16:05 and go wow i can understand that . fucking bootlickers whats next? you gonna go join the army??recruit me?
americans be like ok i cant count past 12 actually
Ah yes, military time. Or, as the rest of the world would call it... time.
i’m saving my brain for special occasions. if i use it every day it’ll get dirty

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
adulthood is carefully writing a two paragraph email that could actually just be reduced completely to “hey, what the fuck”
this guy is from an alternate timeline
“…what”