Eldestdaughter

It’s hard to accept how easily I became nothing.

I’m healed enough to function, not enough to feel safe.

I miss the version of life that felt softer before I learned how temporary things are.

It kills me inside when I think I have to act cold to protect myself knowing I'm the sweetest and clingiest soul you'd ever meet.

i’m very self aware. which unfortunately hasn’t solved anything

i knew i wasn't wanted but i tried to be anyways.

I got nothing relevant to say, nothing relevant I feel, I simply exist in the illusion I’ve created.

why am i like this? well both of my parents are the youngest i am the oldest thanks

i am this way because i am the product of two people who dont love each other anymore

I confuse people. i have a happy personality and a sad soul. i'm bold but shy. i love deeply but sometimes i feel heartless. i'm healing and hurting at the same time. i'm dedicated to growth, but i self sabotage

the “i wanna go home” never leaves my head even when i’m physically sitting in my bed

Everyday

I miss my mother. Despite her exhaustion and the fact that she gave up. I miss her and I miss what she meant to me.

I long for the person I used to be