Eat | Play | Run

Her- impatiently waiting, excited beyond measure, carefully planning and anticipating, packing and repacking. The outfit- khaki skirt and yellow tee (her signature color). Breakfast- cereal with fruit and a piece of toast. Outlook- Ready to take on the year.

Him- ready. Not ready. His outfit- to be determined. His backpack- just found last night. breakfast- goat cheese omelet with fruit and toast, he’s a growing boy. Outlook- positive.

He was tested and questioned and analyzed over a period of 4 days, for 1-3 hours per day. The results were as I expected, similar to the results from the last 2 times he'd gone through this. He had minor issues with slow processing speed, but otherwise, no deficits. No ADD, no ADHD, no autism, no disabilities. He's intelligent, scored in the average to high average in every category, with one or two low averages in the mix and a few "very highs" as well. To appease his dad, they will be giving him an IEP, which in his case means longer time to take tests, check-ins during independent assignments, and limited oral reading participation.

His father still wasn't happy. He thinks there is a bigger problem. He thinks he has ADD. He wants more. "Why, after 3 rounds of testing, are we still getting the same results", he asked?? "Maybe this test is accurate. Maybe there ISN'T actually a problem", I said. The team of specialists argued with him as well. They told him that at his age (13), kids' grades fluctuate. They are dealing with a lot at this age, going through puberty, still trying to figure things out, learning the best way to do things. His father said that we have gotten multiple emails from his teachers describing theses distraction issues. I told him that he was the one to instigate most of these emails and meetings. He argued that our pediatrician diagnosed him with ADD. I replied that she compared forms filled out by us, his parents, and his teachers. She reiterated what I told her was the result of previous testing (she never read the reports), but she didn’t actually evaluated him herself. She never questioned him or checked him over. How is she qualified to make that diagnosis? They, again, appeased his dad by giving him a 504 Plan, which apparently will follow him through life. I mean, how is that even possible? When looking up what a 504 Plan is, the description uses the term "disability" over and over. How did he manage to get my kid a plan to that extent when 3 tests proved that there’s nothing wrong with him?

Yes, he can be distracted and yes, he's a dreamer, but it's nothing more than that. He's smart and capable, he just has to want to do it. His father needs to look like a "good dad". Instead of supporting and loving him, he does this. Makes mountains out of molehills. Gets everyone involved. Causes chaos and makes a scene. He doesn't want to parent, he wants to get perfect results with zero effort. This change of school was supposed to be our fresh start, but he won't let that happen. We have been here one year and already we have a reputation.