sharpen your teeth and bite as hard as you want

You smoked dog weed

it’s 2014 it’s time we moved on as a nation and stop reblogging this

every person who reblogs this in 2015 is gonna get their ass kicked by yours truly

A couple weeks ago my boyfriend (habitual sleeptalker) said in his sleep “thats crazyyyyyy” and I said “what’s crazy?” And he said “that you didn’t know that” and then turned over and did not elaborate. And I can’t stop thinking about it what didnt I know..

He did it again and you know whats truly crazy.. i still don’t know..

just saw a pigeon doing the puffed up courtship dance thing to another pigeon, and as he was strutting around he suddenly stopped for a split second to do a very brief preen-peck at his own side, then returned to the strutting around. and i surprised myself by instantly losing respect for the male pigeon in that moment, like come on man i appreciate you had an itch or whatever but how is she supposed to feel special when you're getting distracted by bullshit like that? which on reflection i don't endorse, i mean those are pretty harsh dating norms i'm imposing on these pigeons, from a total outsider perspective, for no reason. probably not all girl pigeons are as uptight about that sort of thing as i would apparently be if i was a girl pigeon, maybe she even found it endearing who knows, i don't know her. it's none of my business really. sorry pigeons.

(interests pervert) i would love to see your new embarrassing fixation

talking like point-and-click game narration to the bugs in my room

you can't get out that way!

that's not very helpful.

maybe the open window will help.

try the open window instead.

The key to writing good fanfiction is to harbor a deeply humiliating desire, and the trick there is that even pretty basic and societally-accepted desires like “being held” and “being wanted” CAN and WILL be humiliating if they’re intense enough. Become so estranged from human connection that the idea of someone playing with your hair fills you with yearning so deep you feel like you’re going to throw up and you will write some banger fanfiction. It might have some other consequences too but idrk about that.

HELLO?

Darkplace is a key example of how in order to truly master making art that is "deliberately bad" you need to have a thorough understanding of what the medium considers the rules for "good form" so that you can than break every single rule.

is that my chemical romance?

OH MY GOD not every group of emos is my chemical romance stfu tumblr

but it actually is my chemical romance

this is the funniest fuckibg thing I’ve ever seen

I’ve…. seen this everywhere except on Tumblr itself. It’s the blessed post.

i dont consider myself a 'fashion guru' by any means but one thing i will say is guys you dont need to know the specific brand an item you like is - you need to know what the item is called. very rarely does a brand matter, but knowing that pair of pants is called 'cargo' vs 'boot cut' or the names of dress styles is going to help you find clothes you like WAAAYYYY faster than brand shopping

i hate that morrissey wrote i was looking for a job and then i found a job and heaven knows im miserable now. i hate that i have to give him that