sharpen your teeth and bite as hard as you want

You know that cute way bugs wave their front legs looking for the next leaf to walk on I'm doing that to cute transgenders on this website

it was international jazz day and all you guys listened to was a single album??

not even close to joking when i say that everyone going "meeeee :3" in the notes needs to ask themselves why they're so much more willing to listen to jazz that isn't made by black artists

Do not attempt to out-malicious-compliance the staff at the malicious compliance conference.

This ended up being a good bonus prank for me too, because when the counting was done I wrapped the bags in gaffer's tape and spent the rest of the day handing it to people very casually while saying "oh here, hold this for a sec" and then watching they weren't ready for the weight (I only did this to people I know well enough to know this wouldn't hurt them).

It's an infosec conference, so it's a weekend in a hotel full of people whose favorite thing is breaking the law and whose second favorite thing is following the letter of the law while cheerfully violating the spirit.

remember cancel the animal

the secret to getting me to watch a thing is not to recommend it directly but to post passionately about it on tumblr until it takes root in my brain like a parasite and i start to think that it was my own original idea to watch the thing instead of mutual sneaking it into my media diet like a pill in dog food

im begging you watch the whole thing

makes your puppy dusty

Yeah its baically Dusty puppy thursday

“how many times are you going to listen to that song” until the void in my heart is filled

in the comments of a surgical dissection of a human heart video