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(Forgotten) Women of Science

I have someone staying in my hotel tonight that made me think that this would be worth sharing here.

If you are running away/trying to hide from someone that is frightening, abusing, harassing you, and you find yourself staying in a hotel to avoid being found, there’s an extra precaution you can take.

When you check in, ask the front desk clerk to put you as “Unlisted”. They’ll know what you’re talking about. What this means is that as far as anyone other than you and the front desk clerks are concerned, you’re not there. If someone tries to call for you and your room, “I’m sorry. I don’t have anyone registered under that name.” Same thing goes for it someone shows up at the desk. “Unlisted” means you’re untouchable.

If you tell the front desk you do not wish to be contacted, they can and will put a note to everyone else who works there that unless you SPECIFICALLY say that a certain person is allowed to call/come up to your room, they will not let ANYONE near your room- ID will be checked for that person for your safety. If someone asks for you by name that isn’t allowed to know you’re there, the staff will simply say “There is no one here by that name.” If they press, the staff will insist no one is there and they need to leave. Also, housekeeping will be informed of your desire to be left alone and will announce at the door that they are housekeeping, for your peace of mind.

A good tip is to have someone else drive you to the hotel if you’re able- that way your harasser cannot find your car and wait by it for you. Also, if you CAN, stay in a hotel where all the room are indoors- usually smaller indoor hotels do not let non-guests past the lobby, especially if they ask for someone/someone’s room number. Third floor helps, too- at my hotel, we usually put people who are hiding from abusers on the third floor at the end- since you can’t enter the side doors without a key and the elevator is in the middle of the hotel. Always check to see if the outside doors are key-access only, and make sure you know where the elevators are, and see if you can get a room closer to the more secure area! 

Also, if you know their car, or the car of anyone they know and might use, tell the receptionist, especially if you think they may come looking for you. Tell the receptionist what it looks like. If you see it, or if they see it circling the hotel or in the parking areas, they can and will call the police if you need them to. I myself have called the police to chase off an abuser who wouldn’t stop circling the hotel.