This is a Conspiracy

myself: hey

me: ? hey what's

myself: if they wanted to have any kind of contact w/ you they would have initiated it.

me: alright, neat, neat concept, but communication is actually a two-way street so

myself: they have no desire to speak to you and never have any desire to speak to you, ever. they never think of you. they will never think of you, at all, ever, even in passing. you are nothing.

aries: once cried because there were so many worlds to conquer and he hadn't even managed to conquer one

taurus: (when nobody could tame the horse bucephalus and the horse was ordered away) kept talking about how bucephalus was a wonderful horse and they were losing a beautiful creature by taking him away over and over until finally his father let him try to tame the horse

gemini: slept with his copy of the iliad under his pillow

cancer: treated the conquered persians well after he drove king darius to flight because, in his words, darius was his enemy, not persia

leo: would get pissy whenever news of one of his father's great victories would come because he was worried his father wouldn't leave any conquering for him to do

virgo: had a habit of quoting poetry and plays and even did so in terrible situations such as when his father was killed or he was wounded in battle

libra: had a great distaste for athletes and would set up all sorts of competitions for poets and musicians and hunters while pointedly not awarding prizes for more athletic competitions

scorpio: once got mad at a guy and drunkenly threw a cup at him, then made fun of his father when his father was too drunk to do anything about it

saggitarius: traveled so quickly along the coast of pamphylia as to make a legend of himself and then played it off as if it were nothing special

capricorn: slept late on the day when he was supposed to meet darius in battle, and when questioned as to why he was sleeping as if he had already won, smiled and said that he was already victorious for finally getting to go into battle with darius rather than having to chase darius all over the place

aquarius: so admired diogenes the cynic that when diogenes was a dick to him he said that if he were not alexander, he would be diogenes