Always Irritated

You meet those clear blue eyes that have been drawn to you like a moth to a flame. Almost subconsciously, you take a step backwards to put some distance between the two of you.

Steve is leaning on the wall, his thick arms crossed over his defined chest, the seams of his t-shirt nearly burst as he flexes. “Why did you take so long?”

You uncomfortably shift as dozens of leers fall on you, searing straight through the skimpy maid costume. “The lightbulb went out and I couldn’t see.” You tug on the back of the dress, hoping to save at least an ounce of your dignity.

The alpha stares at you a minute longer, analyzing your features before snapping his fingers. “One of you get on the counter and change the light.”

A girl your age surges forward, a bright and suave smile on her face as she passes the frat brothers. You keep your head up and slip out of the dark bathroom.

A warmth ghosts your arm, a slow Brooklyn drawl following suit, “Better get with the others, legacy.”

After tucking away your clothes, you sink back into the small crowd of girls, each of you is clad in your costumes. Varying in colour combinations, but all in the same style, right down to the little lace apron around your waists.

The volunteer from earlier returns, a skip in her step as she takes position front and centre, she’s one of the few girls completely comfortable in these circumstances.

Steve walks forward, exchanging a few words with a brunet alpha. You scan over his body, begrudgingly admiring the way his shirt clings to his biceps, well-built chest and tapering to his thin waist. Finally, you reach his long legs and thick thighs outlined by his dark jeans, but before your eyes can go rogue, you feel a nudge.

Wanda is smiling cheekily. “The pictures didn’t do him justice, right?”

You briefly recall the various photos plastered on the school’s website and social media—Steve Rogers, one of the most prominent figures at Howard College. Most known for being the captain of the football team and the vice president of his fraternity, which itself was exclusively for male alphas, leading to a rowdy bunch of men with egos the size of the moon.

You turn to Wanda and lie, “I don’t remember them.”

The beta looks unconvinced, as expected. Ever since you met her last year, she’s been able to read you like an open book, those inquisitive green eyes peeking through your brain to read the thoughts you haven’t organized yourself. Although, you’ve grown used to her poking and prodding, in an endearing way.

Glancing around at the other pledges, they’re all wearing the same hazy expression, utterly taken by the gods of campus a few feet away.

“You seem a little affected despite not remembering…” She trails off, wiggling her nose.

Your eyes widen and your arms wrap around you. “Really!”

“No, but now I know you were lying.” She replies smugly, flipping her long auburn hair over her shoulder. “As if I could pick you out amongst these ones.”

You deflate, thankful your body hadn’t proven that stereotype right—that omegas are sensual fiends and just easy toys—yet another conception that has haunted you for your whole life.

A loud clap echoes through the room, and everyone’s attention snaps to Steve. He’s taller and bigger than his frat brothers, naturally domineering every other person in the room as he slowly paces. “Welcome to Arcadia Phi, ladies, it’s a good thing you’re all easy on the eyes.” He pauses in front of one girl, frowning, “Almost all of you.”

The eruption of laughter makes you cower backwards, your chest aching for the poor girl. Steve was living up to his reputation as clear as day—the vain, cruelly praised star who couldn’t do any wrong, but on the off chance he did, no one would care. His high and mighty designation and status blind any accountability. You’ve only heard a handful of rumours where people disagreed with him, and only a few actually spoke up about it, but you don’t know what happened after the fact.

Who knows what these ruthless alphas are capable of?

The sons of other alphas who have had the world on a silver platter since their presentation. Taking over society with a snap of their fingers as everyone falls to their knees—in submission or fear.

You hated it, but it’s also all you’ve ever known. A little bit of hope sparks in your chest, a faint perhaps things will change. In your past year at this college, you’ve been blessed to avoid the inevitable consequences that come with being a young, unclaimed omega. The disrespect and objectification, and the horror stories of assault and things even worse.

It hurts even more because of your current predicament, dressed in the most scandalous outfit for the pleasure of these men.

It was unfair to be blessed to not face challenges that no one should ever come across. And, that perhaps burns brighter every time you daydream about a life without any struggles or hardships, where your thoughts and words matter, where your voice can be heard and not disregarded solely based on what you are.

Everyone else was given a chance to be something when they presented, for omegas, it was the opposite. The opportunities slip from your grasp before you can even consider them. Truly doomed by your predestined fate. A mere passenger to the life already written for you.

Howard College has stated multiple times that they’re all for omega rights, but their efforts and representation within the board and council are severely lacking. Their words are silenced by their actions, only confirming their true beliefs.

You weren’t surprised.

It was an awful reflection of society itself. The divide gets thicker every day, between alphas, betas and omegas. Alphas and betas were more common than omegas—but that didn’t halt any ill-treatment, it never did and you dread it never will. Growing up, you’ve heard stories about omega trafficking, and that in some places, breeding programs are still legalized and it’s mandatory for omegas to be claimed within five years of presenting.

At least you weren’t in any of those pieces of hell on earth.

Unfortunately, worldwide, omega rights are nothing but an afterthought. Something to consider after everything else has been handled and stabilized, only when there is care and consideration to spare.

Being at the bottom of the barrel, nothing you say or do could help—so you bite your tongue, tugging at your skirt. God, the more you thought about it, the angrier you got. The audacity and self-entitlement radiating from the men across the room were suffocating. But a voice in your head warns you to steer clear of the fratboys who are notorious for coining the term; omega slut walk.

The vice president stops in front of your side of the group, looming over a beta. When he flashes a charming smile, she sighs dreamily, “A few of you are quite pleasing to look at.”

Some of the girls giggle, flirtatiously fluttering their lashes.

Steve stops short, “I didn’t say I want to hear any of you.” He raises his hand as silence takes over, “That’s better. Just look pretty and do what we say, all right? Then, you’ll all be in our sister sorority.” He pauses, a short test for any rulebreakers, but there aren’t any and he nods in approval.

“Now, ladies, this house hasn’t been deep cleaned in a while.” He stands with his feet spread shoulder-width apart, “So, be thorough, be quiet unless you’re spoken to, and I’ll put in a good word with Maria. Got it?” Everyone silently nods. “You can speak.”

“Yes, Steve.” You all say at once.

The blond cockily grins at his friends. “Good girls, now, line up for your supplies.” He gestures to the kitchen.

The group of you move towards the doorway in a neat line, lips sealed tight as the fratboys talk amongst themselves. Some outrightly compliment the fit of the costumes, their muffled lewd comments make your cheeks heat up.

“Where’s Ari?” One of the betas asks, she’s at the end of the line with her arms crossed over her chest. “He’s the president, why isn’t he here?”

The tall blond quirks a brow, “Last time I checked, his whereabouts isn’t something you need to know.”

“You can’t give orders—I heard Maria made the deal with Ari, not you.”

Steve clears his throat, an unnerving gaze locked on her face. It drags on long enough that the line has completely stalled until someone pushes ahead. Now, you and Wanda stand by the kitchen doorway. You glance back again, and Steve hasn’t moved, neither has the girl—and it’s a flicker, barely noticeable from where you stand, but she slightly recoils. And, like that, Steve pounces.

“And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you get your pledge redacted.” His voice booms as he tilts his head, “Was it worth opening your mouth, beta?”

“I—”

“Curtis, open the door.” The brunet with a buzzcut clicks open the lock, welcoming the afternoon sun as a fresh breeze blows through, but it’s futile against the tension. “Go on, walk out. Leave because you’d rather speak than join Kappa Phi.”

The girl looks at everyone else, wordlessly begging for a saviour, a courageous person to stand up against the vice president but no one does. You’re all either too afraid or too infatuated to even dare and hopelessly, she leaves. Gathering her belongings and slowly walking out of the frat house.

“Maybe we should call this the stupid beta walk.” The man from earlier, Bryce scoffs.

It’s quite comedic watching the other alphas collectively sigh, as if they’re only aware of the doucheness when Bryce opens his mouth. It wouldn’t surprise you if that’s why they kept him around, to make them look better because even within their designations, alphas need to be the absolute best.

With an ego so vast it made room for a new one, blooming from right in the centre.

One of the other brothers pulls Steve aside, he’s the one who was banging on the bathroom door. Bucky is almost as tall as Steve but his hair is longer and darker. Their build is similar, packed with muscles straining against their clothes but Bucky’s skin is slightly more tanned.

Everyone takes turns gathering supplies; some grab a bottle of cleaner and a rag, others take a small bucket and a sponge. You’re one of the last ones and take a sponge and bucket, dipping your finger in the warm water as you retreat to the small group of girls. All of the different scents overwhelm your nose, ranging from antiseptic to bitter to intensely sweet, the betas surrounding you shake with anticipation.

Alphas give each of you tasks all around the house. Some are sent back to the kitchen, the living room or one of the bathrooms. You’re all dismissed with alphas to keep an eye on you, supervisors to bark out demands.

You’re following a few girls to the living room, then settling into a corner, dipping the sponge in the bucket before scrubbing the discolouration on the floorboards. It’s probably a spill from one of their legendary parties.

As you halfheartedly listen to the alphas talk to each other and the occasional vile comment, you remind yourself why you’re doing this.

Wanda’s gleaming face appears in your head, her eyes lighting up at the thought of belonging to the sorority, Kappa Phi, one of the best for betas and omegas—although there have only ever been a few omegas accepted. And unfortunately, you weren’t one of them last year and that’s how you met Wanda, bonding over being rejected from the sorority.

Wanda called Kappa Phi perfect, although not as known as Arcadia Phi. There wasn’t a fraternity like it, with the most celebrity alums and best leaders with successful lives. Sometimes you wonder how those self-serving souls were gifted with great lives, then you realize that’s how society treats alphas—feeding into their hunger, fueling their greed and egos.

Just like that, Wanda’s face transforms into your mother’s disappointed frown, the same one she wore when you told her the news last year.

“Legacy.” A voice singsongs, “Cap would like to speak to you.”

“I can speak for myself.” Steve pushes off the wall. Anxiety scatters your thoughts, because you didn’t know he was there.

Steve can make his presence known if he wants, which has become very clear since you entered Arcadia Phi. And when he doesn’t, he can seamlessly blend in. You bitterly think about him having a choice. To be seen, to be heard, to be feared—all while you are the unseen, ignored and disregarded, and one who is fearful of people like him.

The most terrifying monsters trick you into believing they aren’t monsters at all. Playing on your trust, only to clamp their fangs in your neck when you least expect it, and yank you into their depths.

There wasn’t a doubt in your mind that Steve was one of those monsters, and you were positive he knew he was too.

“Are you sure? All you’ve done is stare at her like a piece of meat.” A dark-haired man speaks up, his sweater sleeves rolled up while the ring and bracelet glimmer against his pale skin.

“Actually, you two stand up.” Steve’s lips are pressed in a firm line. The girl next to you stands, her blond hair in a low ponytail and her green eyes narrowed. “You go upstairs to the first door on the left, and you,” Steve cocks his head, his gaze unabashedly dragging over your body and lingering on your breasts, “You’ll clean my room.”

The girl walks away with confidence, ignoring the alphas who praise the fit of her costume. With a straightened posture, you follow after her, facing forward with the wet sponge in your hand. Steve stands by the bottom of the stairs, emanating a force that both lures and repels you.

“What’s your name?” His hand falls to your waist like it’s been there a million times before, the warmth sinking through your clothes.

You tell him your name as you stop at the last door on the right. It’s strikingly different from the rest, as if it were painted with a fresh coat of white, it stood out among the busted, stained or cracked doors. Your reflection shines in the doorknob, distorted with visible unease over your features.

His arm brushes yours as he unlocks the door, the key slipping out before he dangles it in front of your face.

“I like my privacy. My brothers tend to just do whatever they want.”

The door slowly swings open, as silent as a breath of air. The walls are a dark blue, almost a rich navy and contrasting against the blinding white bedspread, the sheets wrinkled and half off of the mattress. There’s a desk in the corner cluttered with a shiny laptop, pens and textbooks, as messy as yours back at your dorm. The nightstands are mostly clean, apart from a small stack of books and a lamp on each.

There is an arrangement of paddles on the wall. Some are a plain light wood tone and one, in particular, is a design of red, white and blue, all of them display the same thing; Greek letters, the fraternity crest, along with ‘Big Bro Steve’ above the other name.

The wide window is open, a soft wind flows through, lightly rustling the curtains and the various posters taped on the walls—ranging from school promotions, and fraternity and football related. Nothing beyond that, not even a movie or a band which leads you to believe Steve was as one-dimensional as a sheet of paper—his life revolved around school, his fraternity and football.

Bland, but you had no protests because then he’d be easy to forget. Except, those nerves come rushing back again when you spot something on his four-poster bed. On the metal frame by the fluffy pillows are two pairs of handcuffs, unlocked and glaring at you straight in the face.

“Oops, forgot I left those there.”

The way he speaks makes you think he’s lying. Behind you, Steve dips down and takes a deep breath inches away from your head and growls lowly in his chest. Your toes curl in your shoes as your mind tells you to run far away and never come back, but Wanda’s hopefulness and your mother’s dismay root you into the floor of the house.

You needed a spot in Kappa Phi. Even if that meant risking being scented by an ill-famed alpha.

“Have you ever been handcuffed? I can imagine you have a hard time keeping your hands to yourself, you like being touched, and touching someone else.” He rasps, “But I have a feeling that you’re better at following rules than others. Putting on this little dress without any complaints, just a polite request to change in the bathroom.”

You clench your jaw when he tugs at the bow of the apron, “Can I just clean?”

You gasp and the water splashes and gets on your dress—it was a costume, made of cheap flimsy material that wouldn’t survive a gust of wind, and it definitely wouldn’t survive a strong alpha like Steve. He has the tie wrapped in his fist, the fabric digs into your front and pulls you into his chest, keeping you firmly against him.

“Did you leave your manners downstairs?” He doesn’t shout, his words are quiet and low and that only makes them more unsettling.

“N-No.” You despise the rapid beating of your heart, your natural instincts kicking in and nearly forcing you under his submission. “I’m sorry, can I please clean?” Your ass brushes over the firm bulge in his pants.

“Pretty, sweet and smart? Makes me wonder how an omega like you is still unmated.” He releases you and he reaches for your scent gland, but you quickly shuffle into his bedroom. Steve just chuckles, “Eager to please too—sounds to me that you’re picture-perfect material.”

“What should I clean first?” You avoid his gaze, finding great interest in the gentle ripples of the water in the bucket. You can’t let him that close again, and you shouldn’t have let him that close in the first place. If he touches your spot, you’d be another notch on his belt and another omega on the slut walk list—because yes, there was a list and it’s plastered in the living room.

It didn’t help that he smells so good, earthy and borderline spell-inducing. He makes you sick to your stomach and then that nausea erupts into flames of rage because he’s an asshole standing on a pedestal with his name etched in gold.

Steve made you feel so many things when you didn’t even know him. When he was just Howard College’s star player, and that hasn’t changed since you’re feet away from him. Those overwhelming and inconsistent feelings have appeared again. You don’t want him to make you feel anything. Except maybe forgotten, because then he’d leave you alone.

“How about you just get on your knees, omega?”

He doesn’t move, taking up more than half of the entryway as he gestures to the moderate mess of his bedroom. You shiver and obey, turning around and spotting a hamper with clothes hanging over the edge, some on the floor. You drop to your knees, gathering each item as his smell encapsulates your mind. You’re briefly reminded of your boring and plain bedroom, and how much better it would look with a nest.

On the walls of your brain are images of a warm and comforting bundle, varying in pillows and blankets, but most notably, there’s a heaping of fabrics that look awful like Steve’s clothes in your hands.

You start to feel sick again, and if only you could scrub your brain instead of the floorboards.

“Ain’t that a pretty view.” Steve crosses his arms, admiring the view of your upper thighs, “Don’t get any ideas, legacy.”

“What?” You toss the clothes into the basket and cover it. Standing once again, you straighten the bottles of cologne and other belongings on his dresser. It’s a little dusty, so you take the sponge from the bucket and wipe it down.

“You might want to snatch something of mine. Wouldn’t be the first time an omega tried to steal from me. I’ve been told I have an irresistible scent, I mean, it’s nothing like yours but could be a runner up.”

You try to focus on your tasks. Going from his nightstands to his closet, hanging up a few clothes that have fallen and organizing the shoes on the rack. You’re kneeling in the closet when one of his fraternity brothers pops up, you ignore them as best you can, sorting the different sneakers, boots and dress shoes.

A loud laugh startles you, making you drop a pair of sneakers.

“Oh, she’s jumpy?” You vaguely remember that voice, you’ve heard him in a few of your lectures.

“She’s cute, right? Like a little bunny.”

Your head snaps back as you glare at Steve. Every moment you spend in his presence makes you want to do something, to be more than a mere bystander, but to an extent because you didn’t want to make him too angry. You still wanted to—needed to join Kappa Phi.

It turns out your heated glare was barely anything, and all you get is a coy wink from the tall blond.

“Honey, are you okay down there?” The older alpha, Andy asks, faint dimples under his thick beard, “You don’t look like the kind to spend a lot of time on your knees.”

You abruptly stand, narrowed gaze set on the two burly men by the door. They have you caged in with a mocking gleam on their faces, daring you to say whatever your little fiery heart desires. Say it, tell them what assholes they are, how they deserve nothing they have—how their self-righteousness is just them making up for their lack of knot.

Fucking say it.

You can feel the frustration buzzing in your chest, but your throat and lips refuse to cooperate, forcing the rest of you to just bubble in silent fury. Opening your mouth would be digging your own grave, but the cold and wet dirt is better than Steve’s and any other alpha’s poisoned presence.

If only you were immune to whatever toxicity was streaming through their veins and draped in their words.

Silently defeated by yourself and their taunting expressions, you turn away and dust your dress, belittling yourself for retreating so quickly.

“Good choice, legacy.” Andy quips, “what else are you willing to do for a spot in Kappa?”

“If I tell you, will it happen?” You busy yourself with Steve’s desk. Organizing the pens and pencils into the mason jar, before moving onto the sheets of paper.

“Depends what it is.”

“I’m willing to redo that law essay you flunked on.” You face them again, and Andy has a surprised, but pleased smile on his face. Steve is the opposite, his eyebrows are furrowed while his lips are pressed in a firm line.

“Yeah? Do you want to tutor me too?”

Steve steps forward, inserting himself between you and the other alpha like a brick wall. “You can’t do a thorough job if you’re distracted. Do you want him to leave?”

You hold the papers to your chest, “Pardon?”

“Tell him, show me that you’re Kappa Phi material.” He smirks. “Tell him to leave us alone, omega.”

The sheets crinkle in your hands as you tense. Speaking back to alphas was only a fantasy, sure you’ve dreamt of kicking their teeth in, but you have never crossed that line.

Omega—he was reminding you of your designation, as if you could forget it. But you knew he only wanted to rub it in, to summon that dread and watch it bleed onto your features because omegas could never tell an alpha what to do and have the same impact of an alpha demanding an omega.

Your words would be nothing but white noise, as forgetful as an advertisement on the radio and no one would listen because no one had to. Not like omegas who bowed down at the first syllable of an alpha using their alpha voice or being subject to a great deal of pain.

You couldn’t tell an alpha what to do, not without looking like a fool, even if it was one as casual and collected as Andy.

“C’mon, I know there’s a little spice in all that sweetness. You’ve wanted to open your mouth since you walked in here, and now I’m permitting you to.” Steve comes closer until he stands a few inches from you, his stature towers over you like a mountain.

“G-Go away.”

Andy chuckles from the door, “What was that?”

Steve grabs your chin, “That’s not what I told you to say, darling.”

You can’t tell if the aching you feel is your pride or your loneliness thriving in the attention—you haven’t been the object of one's attention, alpha or beta, in a very long time.

“Leave us alone, Andy.” You’re frozen in the pools of blue surrounded by thick lashes. As if it weren’t enough for his body to be your wet dream, his face was a work of art. Chiselled cheekbones, strong jaw and a prominent nose. Clear skin sprinkled with freckles and beauty marks, and pink plump lips that stretched into a prince-like smile.

You hated to find him so attractive, but the world has never been on your side anyway.

The brunet pushes off the doorframe, “I guess I’ll check on the other girl in the bathroom. Be gentle with this one, Steve, she seems more delicate than your last toy.”

And, just like that, you’re flung back into reality. Steve is also a player, known for his various relations that never last more than a few weeks. He’s probably been with more than most think. Some are too ashamed for everyone to know that Steve Rogers had them, then dumped them like trash on the side of the road.

Typical Arcadia alphas, plucking people left and right then ditching them when they get bored or when a new spark catches their attention.

You don’t want to be that for Steve. You refuse to be the new object of his affection—because that’s how he’d treat you, something to show off until he doesn’t want you anymore.

Not to mention you just hated everything he stood for.

The easy life, the self-entitlement, privilege and downright mean attitude, selfishness and arrogance rolled into one.

You just need to keep a distance, keep reminding yourself why you’re here and that he’s just a bad man. A terrible man who shouldn’t even be touching you right now. You take a step back and distract yourself with his desk. Filing through the textbooks and setting them on the small shelf.

“I’ve seen you around campus. Do you have a dorm here?”

“I do.” You answer short. You’ve seen him riding his bike and revving the engine. Zooming down the campus streets with a leather or denim jacket. The supposed legend in the making, but right now, he was just the shadow looming over your shoulder, chilling to the bone.

Steve pulls out his desk chair and sits down, relaxing on the cushions and spreading his thighs. His foot knocks yours. “I haven’t had a dorm room, just tried for Arcadia and got in so I’ve lived here for about two years now.”

You just nod, gathering the small bunches of sticky notes and scattered paper clips.

“Those go in the drawer.” He runs a hand through his hair, a twinkle in his eyes.

You open the drawer and are welcomed with strips of condoms and tubes of lube. Your cheeks go hot as you drop the items in and slam it shut. “Those should be in your nightstand.”

“Oh, I have them there too. These are just backups.” Steve’s gaze rakes over you as his tongue pokes out to lick his lips. “You tried to get into Kappa last year.”

You’re doing this for Wanda and your mother, and you need to try even harder than you did last year. Maybe after this, your mother will finally return your calls, you can only hope that one day, she’ll recognize the wrongness in her actions. Pushing you away only because you didn’t get into her old sorority. Whether Kappa Phi didn’t accept you because of your designation or other reasons, it’s not fair of her to treat you this way.

“Unlike Arcadia, Kappa is quite easy to get into. They’ll accept anyone like every other frat or sorority on campus.” Steve rolls his eyes, “So, it makes me curious as to why you were denied, legacy.”

“Can you not call me that?” And you quickly add, “Please?”

“That’s what you are. Your mother was in Kappa Phi, and now you’re going to be in it too—maybe, I can still redact your pledge but I wouldn’t want to make momma-legacy upset. Does she know you’re trying again?”

“She would if she answered my calls.”

Steve is quiet for a few seconds before he nods slowly. You grab the sponge and try to move away, but he grabs your wrist, pulling you to stand between his legs. “What’d you do to not get in? Sleep with another girl's partner? Hook up with a professor for some extra credit?”

You scowl. “None of that.”

“My brothers and I have a theory that every omega is a whore until proven innocent.”

You stiffen as his other hand fiddles with the lace hem of your dress, slipping between the first layer to the second and finally to your skin. His fingers trail higher, and you clamp your thighs together, glazing at the open door as his grip on your wrist tightens. You want him to let go and stop, so you say the one thing that has been in your head, “You’re an asshole.”

The second those words leave your mouth, a fresh wave of relief combs over you, but then it freezes like water. The realization is icy cold, stilling in your veins and halting your breath.

“What was that?” He moves fast and stands, crowding you against the desk. The water drips down your elbow as you raise your arms and try to keep him at bay, but it’s useless. He presses against you, the water seeping into his shirt.

“An asshole—am I mean? Like your mother who’s ignoring you because you didn’t get into a sorority?” Steve asks, “I can be much worse than that, and I think you know that.”

He grabs your chin between his thumb and forefinger, he’s close enough that you can see every shade of blue and tint of green in his eyes. His lips are so pink and pillowy soft, you can’t help but lean into his touch like a magnetic force. “You’re looking at me like I’m going to hurt you.”

It’s instinctual and completely out of your control. The warmth he radiates, the raw power and just alpha compelling you. You realize you’ve been fighting him since you met him, and as vigorously as you resisted, he could turn you to mush with a flutter of his eyes.

He hums softly, drinking down your smell like a man starved. When his gaze meets yours again, the iris is a thin ring around the pupil. “And, I just might.” His white teeth gleam maliciously behind a simper.

You snap out of whatever fleeting spell he had you under and inch backwards, willing yourself to stay silent. He steps forward, his thigh slipping between yours and pinning you against the desk.

“I won’t hurt a pretty omega like you unless you give me a reason to.” His Brooklyn twang rings in your ears, drilling the threat into your brain. “So, don’t give me one.”

You nod wordlessly, gripping the sponge so tightly that all the water was gone, and probably on Steve’s shirt and your dress. You can’t move to check because he keeps you in place, provoking you to make a wrong move.

And, unknowingly, you did and Steve sighs in disappointment, you find yourself searching your mind for the cause of it—before a round of cheers grab your attention. Your face slips from Steve’s hold before he grips you again, this time with your chin between his knuckles, lightly pinching you. “Speak, sweetheart.”

“Y-Yes, Steve.”

“Good girl.” His touch trails across your jaw, then down your neck. “This is cute.” He notes, touching the silver chain around your neck, all the way to the small circle with the stamped letter. He tuts when you don’t speak. “Don’t make me repeat myself.”

“Thank you, Steve.” You gulp, practically sitting on his desk with his thigh snug between yours. The bottom of your dress is dangerously close to exposing your panties.

“Who’s H?”

“My friend.”

He flips the metal charm, rubbing the pad of his thumb over the engraving. “Your friend.”

“My best friend.” You squirm as his other hand lands on your hip, gently squeezing, “We grew up together but he goes to Harvard.”

“Childhood friends… Isn’t that adorable?” Steve beams, “You’re sentimental, then?” He twirls the necklace around his finger as the chain digs into your neck.

With every swirl of his digit, he brings you another inch closer as his breath fans over your cheeks. “I-I guess.”

He’s quiet for a few moments, his watchful gaze locked on your face, observing every minuscule twitch. “Would you wear my name?”

“What?”

“Would you wear my name right here,” he lightly pulls at the chain, “or would you rather wear my mark,” it almost happens in slow motion. With your arms uselessly sandwiched between your bodies, his touch trails to your scent gland, applying pressure, “right here. Where everyone can see.”

His smell increases tenfold, forming a cloud around you and soaking into your brain. The smoky and woody scent is calming and awakening at the same time. This is exactly what you didn’t want to happen, but your defences are fluttering to the ground with every millisecond as he scents you—without your consent. It triggers some of your basic instincts, the innate desire to be claimed by another, to be submissive and at their beck and call.

With the chain in his grasp and a gentle touch of his fingers, he cracks the walls you’ve built to keep yourself safe and secure, to keep yourself separate from your designation and your predestined fate.

You attempt to collect yourself and through uneven breaths, you push him away. Steve doesn’t budge, he only grabs your thigh and hikes it on his waist, forcing you on the desk as your dress flips up. His dark gaze lands on your cotton panties and he growls appreciatively, nostrils flaring.

Your heart beats against your chest, loud enough to rattle your brain. “Please, don’t.” You whisper. “I can’t—I don’t...”

“You don’t?” He rubs your spot in slow circles, “If you don’t want me, then why are you getting wet?” He emphasizes his words by snapping the band of your panties against your skin, drawing closer to your warm centre.

“Because you’re—” You whine, resolve melting away with every delicate motion of his fingers, you slump under his touch.

Weak, you feel so weak yet desired. It’s a cruel curse of euphoria and you hate yourself for it, although it’s completely out of your control.

“You want me, sweetheart. I can see it on your face, I can smell you soaking your panties. I bet if I listen hard enough, I can hear your whiney thoughts begging for me.” Steve’s voice is smooth and deep, “But, all I can hear is your heart racing because you’re excited. Have you ever been touched like this?” His hand brushes over your panties and cups your mound.

“It’s not that.”

Steve’s hold tightens on your necklace as his long and thick fingers start rubbing over the cotton fabric, your wetness unmistakably seeping through. “Then what, omega?”

You don’t answer. You can’t answer, not while all of your pent-up frustration comes rushing in. The look in his eyes is hard to pinpoint whether he’s remorseless, fully intrigued or downright enjoying toying with you.

Your lips quiver as tears pool in your eyes. You hate him, and you hate how good he’s making you feel with just a few fingers. You whimper as he tugs your panties to the side, sliding between your slick folds.

“Is it fear?” His tone is light and taunting, “Because that’s even better than excitement and, it looks especially lovely on you, legacy.”

As he releases your necklace, and his warmth on your scent gland leaves too. You’re flooded with ease and without his support, you sag into the shelf on the desk, the textbooks fall and the mason jar of pens tips over, clattering to the ground as the glass rolls away.

Steve tears the front of your dress, the cheap seams giving away under his strength. Your nipples meet the cool air, pebbled and immediately pinched by the alpha standing between your legs. He growls, massaging your tits as his other hand returns to your nub.

“You haven’t been touched in a while. I can tell.” His tone is so wickedly gentle, it’s a sharp contrast to his character. “Look at you, going dumb for me already, getting my desk wet.” He rasps, “C’mon, push me away.”

Your hands land on his forearms as your last line of defence falls.

His eyes lock on yours, his pink lips part in low breaths. “Do it. Tell me you don’t want me.”

Your fingertips press into his skin when he pulls away from your cunt, his big hands land on your inner thighs. A strained whine escapes your throat, a silent plea for more.

“Or, tell me you want me, baby. Cry for me—let me know how bad you want my touch, my fingers in your pretty pussy, my knot in your fuckhole.” Steve massages your flesh, inching closer to your core but never directly touching there, “I want to hear you say it, omega.”

His words are another blow to your pride. You surrender to his undeniable authority, giving in to him because Steve was right, you haven’t been touched in a long time, and everyone was a victim to his command—that didn’t exclude you.

Do you want him?

Do you even have a choice?

“Let me hear you, sweet girl. Give me what I want, don’t you want to make me proud?”

Maybe you did and that’s why he was asking.

You consider it, which might have been your first mistake. After all the rumours you’ve heard, most of them have been proven to be true, you shouldn’t trust him or want to make him proud. Why should his commendation matter when he’s nothing but another alpha with a sense of superiority?

Because he isn’t just another alpha—he’s Steve Rogers.

And he wants you.

You should have stayed far away from him and Arcadia Phi, regardless of your best friend’s and mother’s wishes. But you didn’t, and now look at you, sprawled on his desk with his bedroom door open, scantily clad in a torn maid costume with your most sensitive spot exposed. Your scent gland is still buzzing with his touch, craving more.

Despite your hateful feelings, you want more, you want him. There’s no denying that at this moment.

That’s when the first tear falls down your cheek, leaving a shiny trail in its wake.

“Please touch me, Steve. I-I want you.” You hiccup, reaching for his hands to bring one to your face, the other to your pussy. Your knees hook around his waist, “Want you so bad, alpha.”

His blue eyes twinkle, the corner of his lips quirk up, “That’s my omega.”

You would have never expected your day to end up like this. Willingly giving in to his advances, but maybe that was why you even considered it.

Steve knows the truth. You believed you had a choice when he was going to get what he wanted one way or another. He thrives off your sweet little heart having faith in yourself, it’s adorable. And, he can’t wait to corrupt you.

“Please, Steve.” Your legs fall open, neck craning to watch his skilled fingers trace your hole, barely dipping it before rubbing your clit again. You’re aching for him and anything he can give you.

Your slick drips out and Steve’s mouth waters, he’s seconds away from dropping to his knees and devouring you whole. “Do you know how long I’ve waited for this? I saw you at orientation—you seemed so lost but eager.” He cups your face, leaning down until his nose brushes yours and finally, one of his fingers pushes in, pressing to his knuckle before drawing out. “You didn’t even fucking look at me.”

You whine, scrambling for his broad shoulders and falling deeper into that blissful headspace.

“As if I wasn’t even there.” He slides in with two fingers, sissoring you open. He pumps in deep, curling his digits to reach your special spot as his thumb lands on your clit, “Now look at you, baby, dripping on my desk, your cunt sucking me in. Bet you’re hungry for a knot, huh?” There’s a softness in his eyes and his touch on your cheek. His warmth sinks to your bones, burning an imprint in the shape of him.

Steve speeds up and adds more power. His bicep flexes with every thrust, working you open as your juices drip down his hand, marking him with your scent. He looms over you, huge and intimidating, making you a compliant mess. His groan rumbles his chest as he pulls out to slap your pussy, the wet noises make your cheeks heat up. “Nearly forced Kappa Phi to take you in but my ex was the president at the time.”

He captures your lips in his, slipping his tongue in your mouth as his palm falls to the side of your neck. Your jaw falls slack as he rubs your gland and penetrates three thick fingers into your tight hole at the same time. Steve growls, biting on your bottom lip before kissing you sloppily. He tastes like mint and he’s demanding and rough, while you’re needy and docile, a perfect match.

You turn away as he picks up pace, spreading his long fingers along your inner walls. Moans flow out of your body and into the open air, shameless and absolute music to Steve’s ears. He stretches you open as the shelf digs into your back, his expert touch bringing you to the edge fast. Heat builds in your belly and even in the thin dress, you feel the sweat on your skin. He spanks your clit, feeding off your mewls along with the lewd sopping noises coming from your core. Your cream has formed a mess under your ass as it’s forced out of your poor hole, dripping down to your rosebud.

“That’s it, you going to come for me, sweet girl? This cunt was made for taking cock, for taking mine—you want my knot, omega? Since you’re this wet from my hand, I bet you’re a stupid mess when you’re in heat. You hear that?” He slaps your cunt in quick succession, “You’re dripping for me, you want me to stretch you open, fuck you until you can’t even think.” He grunts, teeth clenched as your thighs threaten to shut, he prys them apart and swats your clit harder, still pounding you with his fingers. “You’d take my cock if I just asked, huh? You’d let me fill your little cunt, breed you like a dumb slut. I bet you fucking love this.”

You cover your face as you squeal, the back of your head thumping against the wall as you convulse. Your slick pours out, soaking his skin and dripping down his wrist. His pumps don’t stutter or even slow down, he keeps up the intensity and you’ve officially lost your mind. You fist his t-shirt in your other hand, either trying to escape or pull him closer, you don’t even know.

“So fucking tight, you don’t even want me to stop, huh?” He yanks you close by the back of your neck, he spits into your open mouth. “That’s why you squirted all over me, fucking cock hungry whore.” He kisses you although you barely respond, too fucked out and dazed. When he pulls away, he messily traces through your folds, smearing your juices around as he releases your lips with a pop.

The blue in his eyes is hardly visible, but that could just be your watery vision. He brings his hand to your face, spreading his digits as your cream webs between them. “You want a taste, baby?”

You let him slip two fingers into your mouth, pressing to the knuckles and forcing you to clean him. He groans as you gag slightly, tears welling in your eyes as he fucks your mouth just like your cunt. When he deems you’ve had enough, he sucks his ring finger, eyes fluttering shut at your taste. He’s filthy with it, putting on a show, letting you know just how he’d treat your precious pussy with his tongue.

“Tastes even better than I thought.” Steve sighs, and runs his fingers along the bottom half of your face, your wetness mixed with both of your saliva dries on your skin. “Now, if you did that last year during pledge week, you would’ve gotten into Kappa without a doubt.”

You’ve barely managed to catch your breath, still riding on that wave that’s made you question your entire college career. “I-I don’t need your help.”

Steve laughs, easily picking you up and sitting in the chair. Even in his lap, he’s bigger than you. “You just need me. And with that, you’re going to get my help anyway.” He grips your hips as your tingling cunt meets his jeans.

“Wait—” You gasp, “It’s too much, I can’t—”

“You can,” He kisses down your cheek to your jaw, he sucks at the spot right by your scent gland. “And, you will. Make me even prouder, omega. Rub yourself on me, make a mess on my pants. Claim me just like I’ll claim you.” Then, his teeth drag over your spot, immediately making you pliant in his hold and to his voice. “Be a good girl for daddy.”

You tie your arms around his shoulders, wasting no time in grinding against the giant bulge. The denim is rough against your sensitive petals, but it feels so good, it feels better than your pillow at your dorm and with every swirl of your hips, Steve groans freely against your neck.

He tears the back of your skimpy dress and the fabric falls down your body. It hangs from your waist and the skirt flutters with every rock of your hips. Your cunt is tortured by his jeans, your clit rubbed raw and begging for a break, but you can’t give yourself one. Not until Steve wants you to because, despite your best efforts, you’ve fallen victim to his cruel charm and your darkest fantasies.

Steve sucks on your spot, teasing you with nips between his dirty words. You can’t even hear him anymore, your body hums with passion and want. An instinctual desire to obey his every command and be his good girl, you want to claim him—own him like he owns you.

Perhaps the stereotypes about omegas were always right, and you’ve been in denial. Or, Steve is just intoxicating with a magnetic force that draws you in. He’s awoken a longing inside you, one that you didn’t even know existed.

“They said you were one of the smartest omegas on campus, but it doesn’t seem like that now.” Steve grabs your throat with one hand, guiding you over his clothed cock with the other. “I turned you into my little omega, my dumb slut. I can feel your pussy throbbing for me, oh, my pussy—because this tight fuckhole was made for me.” He tightens his hold and licks from your jaw to your cheek. “Aw, are you crying for me? Giving daddy those pretty tears, it’s like you never want me to let you go.”

You struggle against him, hiccuping another pathetic moan as he thrusts upwards, meeting your grinds.

Steve knows you aren’t incapable, not like the rest of the dull and drab students of Howard College. You had a fight in you, albeit timid and frail, it was there and he can only imagine what other fire hides within your soul. He read the hatred and spite on your face like an open book, you weren’t as secretive as you thought and he assumed you’d be trouble. But no, you stayed quiet and obedient until he lured you out.

You had potential, you had shown that with your early resistance and how you treated Andy—fucking Andy, this morning he asked if you could clean his room, but Steve had already made his intentions clear. You were his for the day, and the next, until he was done with you. Which wasn’t anywhere in the near future.

Watching you now, teary eyes rolled in the back of your head and listening to your mewls echo through the room, he hopes Andy and the rest of his frat brothers were listening. Then, they’d know that Steve wasn’t letting you go, they could try, they could beg and fight, and he’d just tease you in front of their noses. Playing with people was fun, and with you in his corner, he’d never lose.

“Fuck, keep going.” Steve hisses, the veins in his neck tense as his head falls back. His fingertips dig into your ass, groping the flesh, “That’s it, you’re doing so good, baby.”

“Daddy, ah please, daddy.”

“What do you need, omega?” Steve pants, flipping up the stubborn skirt to watch your puffy cunt grind against his bulge. The denim is dark under you and he has the perfect view of your spread folds and swollen clit rubbing along his jeans, your sweet slick seeping through his jeans to his skin, he can feel you.

“F-Fuck me, please—I want it, want it.” You repeat, nails dragging down his shirt, your poor hole weeping for him.

He smirks, “My little girl wants my cock? Want me to stretch your tight pussy, fuck you until you don’t have any tears left, pump you full of my cum and fucking breed you?” He spanks you, making you jerk and squeak, “You want to be my omega?”

You nod shakily and reach down, weakly attempting to unbutton his pants but he swats you away. With his feet planted firmly on the ground, he takes control and moves you roughly over his dick. You let out a high-pitched squeal, knees pressing into the cushion of the seat as you try to right yourself, but it’s feeble against his strength.

“You want my cock so bad that you’ll just pull it out without my permission?” Steve’s stomach tightens as the tears trail down your cheeks, slipping into the corners of your parted mouth. “Thought you’d know better now.”

You grab onto his wrists, piercing his skin with your nails, “I-It’s too much!” Your cry.

“It’s not enough.” He grabs your throat, not tight enough to restrict airflow but firm enough to let you know he can, and it only makes you greedier. You try to meet his grinds but you’re just bouncing on his lap.

“D-Daddy, I can’t.”

“You can.” He insists, getting closer to the edge. He imagines your tight hole clenched around his cock as he stuffs his knot into you. “You can, and you will.”

You weep, “...can’t.”

Steve has always loved a little challenge and he knows you’re an omega who hoped for more, who craved for more—and it was ultimately intriguing. To tame the feisty attitude bubbling inside of you, the same flicker he sees when he speaks again. “You can’t come.”

Your eyes shoot open, a torn and angry expression on your face, “But—”

“Shush now, baby.” He groans, cheeks flushed red as his whole body tenses, and he never stops moving you over him. “I said make a mess, I didn’t say you could come. Tell me you want to be mine.”

“Daddy, please—” You whimper, the tightness in your belly becoming too much.

Steve swats your ass harshly, “fucking say it.”

Your cunt throbs between your thighs, the denim has rubbed you raw, “I-I want to be yours, daddy.”

Steve groans gutturally, his back arches as his eyes flutter shut. Throaty praises ring in your ears, his hold is so tight that they’ll be bruises tomorrow. His muscles flex, his abs, biceps and thick thighs under you, and you can feel his cock swell up under your core. His knot is going to waste and you whine.

Steve's hair falls against his forehead as he looks at you, blue eyes full of bliss and perhaps even devotion—he’s beautiful and evil.

You sniffle quietly, feeling his warm cum seeping through the denim. “You’re so mean…”

Steve’s chest heaves, a sheen of sweat on his forehead. “Thought we already established that, baby?”

The open air is exactly what you need as you limp down the path with your clothes in your arms, some girls can’t help but stare at you. In envy or pity, they watch your uneven steps. They’re all still wearing their costumes, the evening breeze isn’t kind to their exposed skin. You stand out like a sore thumb, clad in Steve’s t-shirt and his sweatpants. Your poor folds gaining a bit of much-needed relief.

Some of the other pledges are talking—you know it’s about you despite how quiet they try to be.

They know, everyone in the house knew what happened in Steve’s bedroom. And some of the other girls were either jealous or sorrowful. You were unsure about your own feelings too, since you’re still teetering on the edge of that omega headspace because Steve couldn’t stop touching your gland.

In particular, the Arcadia alphas were as shameless as ever. They clapped and cheered when you wobbled down the stairs with Steve on your tail.

“Legacy deserves a gold star for that performance.”

“I’m going to knock your teeth in if you don’t shut up, Bryce.” Steve spits as he pulls you to the kitchen, grabbing a cold water bottle from the fridge.

Bucky whistles lowly, “And thus, the innate need to be an asshole after getting with an omega. Don’t you all wish there were more omega pledges, fellas?”

Steve ignores him in favour of gathering snacks from the cabinets and shelves. And, for the rest of the day, you sit on his lap in his clothes, watching the other pledges sweat and scrub at the whole house.

He relaxes on the couch, one of his hands never leaving your body as he speaks to his brothers, petting and tending to you like a doll, “Perhaps little legacy is Kappa Phi material, huh, baby?”

You don’t look back once, forcing yourself to stare ahead as Wanda asks how you’re feeling, among other things. You’ll tell her when you’re at your dorm and far away from Arcadia Phi.

Steve watches from the front door of the frat house, his arms crossed as the breeze brushes his bare skin, the band of his sweatpants hanging dangerously low. Behind him, his frat brothers are discussing names of the pledges, yours pops up more than a few times and is followed by a lewd comment.

“Our sister sorority, too. You’re freakier than I thought, punk.” Bucky steps beside him, a little apron in his hands.

“I wonder if I should tell our parents about his risqué behaviour.” Another voice says as an arm swings around Steve’s shoulder, “What do you think, little brother? Will mom and dad return you?”

Steve shrugs off Ransom, glaring at him. “I’m older than you, dipshit, and that’s not how adoption works.”

“Blah, blah, blah. All I’m hearing is the sound of an overdue glorified housepet.” He teases while the blond just scoffs.

They’ve been this way since they met, their relationship was strong from the beginning but that didn’t lessen any of the bickering or fights that every other sibling has. The only difference was their resilience yet they had odd similarities in terms of behaviour and attitude. Both being headstrong and fearless alphas. It was a wonder how they had lasted this long while constantly sharing a circle of friends.

“Although, I must acknowledge your exquisite taste because that sweet girl,” Ransom points down the street, “is on every alpha and beta—probably some wild omegas too—radar.”

“Surprised she hasn’t been claimed yet.” Curtis speaks up, “actually, I’m shocked a lot of omegas here haven’t been mated.”

“Some of us have standards and most of those omegas have been strung through every bed on campus.” Ransom replies, grinning at his brother, “I admire our parallel preferences, Stevie, think I can take a go at legacy?”

“Fuck you.”

“Oh, it seems that testosterone is still sky-high. I’ll ask you when you’ve had time to wind down, try out the hot tub, huh?” The brunet leaves with a wink and a slap on Steve’s shoulder, waltzing into the house and joining the discussion with the rest of the brothers.

“Hate to be the bearer of bad news, Mr. fuck-em-and-leave-em, but she doesn’t even like us,” Bucky laughs, “Much less you.”

“Not yet.” He licks his lips as your group disappears around a corner. The empty air still carries a thread of your scent, or maybe that’s just your soaked panties crumbled in his pocket.

He was already one of the gods of Howard College and he's going to be yours too.

𝐄𝐧𝐝𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: well here it is ! the first part of captain's legacy and the first dark fic I've ever posted. mean!Steve just does something to me, and I have a feeling he'll be like that for a while. this is a dark fic, so we'll see how much fluff is in the future. the ending was supposed to be longer but I think it fits better in the next part and like my other series, this has no update schedule.

As always, I hope you all enjoyed this and I’d love to hear your thoughts/feedback !! <3 — ☼ 𝐃𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐊𝐨-𝐟𝐢 ☼

Wrapped up in her again

I was starting to spin

A record I can't pause

Hey Girl — Stephen Sanchez

You click in your lap belt, eyes fixed unblinkingly on the screen of your Switch balanced on your thighs. Your villager is seated on a mushroom log, her little head bobbing as she waits for you. She has many choices for how she can occupy her day. Perhaps you'll have her fish in the pond near her log cabin. Or maybe she'll start by checking out Tom Nook's shop for the daily selection of new furniture. You know for sure she'll be visiting her neighbors to see what new recipe she can learn to craft today.

Yes, your little Animal Crossing girl is waiting for you, and you try to focus on only that as the rumble beneath you intensifies, and the engine's roar turns nearly deafening. You don't look around the cabin, and you don't look out the tiny window to your right. But you do look at the girl to your left when her powdery-soft hand covers yours. You peer nervously into bright blue eyes and a megawatt smile that reveals slightly crooked teeth which only serve to make her look more charming.

"It's okay," Chrissy whispers, working her fingers between yours and squeezing comfortingly. "I'm right here."

You squeeze her back as the plane taxis on the runway. A hazel eye suddenly peeks at you from between the seats, concerned beneath a tousled head of brown hair. "You okay, baby?" Steve asks, and you nod, head bobbing extra hard as if to convince yourself. "It's only three hours. We'll be there before you know it. Want me to switch with Chris and sit with you?"

Chrissy, looks at you encouragingly. "Whatever you want," she says.

"...No," you reply, voice small. "It's okay. I'll be fine."

You feel the nerves intensify as the plane starts to rumble forward, slowly at first, and then faster and faster. Your breath begins to quicken as the acceleration pushes you back against the plasticky cushions—

Suddenly, a head of wild curls pops above the seat in front of you, brown eyes gleaming over a wide grin as Eddie plants his chin against the seatback. Anatomically, that would be impossible if he was following proper safety protocol; he must be breaking at least three rules of etiquette during takeoff. 

"Eddie!" You hiss, gaze darting around the cabin to see if anyone has noticed. "Sit down!" You glance at Chrissy, but she's eyeing her boyfriend with a flat, resigned stare, clearly used to being unable to control him.

"I am sitting down," he replies with a cheeky tilt to those full lips. His arms join his chin as he folds them casually against the seatback. "Well, I'm half-sitting, half-kneeling, but still—"

"It's not safe!"

Eddie scoffs lightly, expression rife with mischief. "I'm perfectly safe, sweetheart. Car accidents kill far more people every year than plane crashes. I'm safer here than I would be driving my van."

"Truer words have never been spoken," Chrissy mutters to herself. Eddie merely smiles widely.

"See that? Chris agrees with me."

The force of your outraged glare only makes him chuckle. You sputter, "Eddie… if we get kicked off this flight because you don't know how to sit still for three hours—"

"Oh, I can sit still." Eddie cuts you off, glancing toward the nearby cabin wall before his eyes return to you, expression smug. "And you may want to look out the window."

You realize the scenery outside now looks like a circuit board— darkness cut by hundreds of tiny glittering lights in hues of white, red, and yellow, arranged in lines and grids far beneath you now.

You let out a slow breath, hand unclenching from Chrissy's. Eddie smiles again, pleased this time. "Ya see? The worst is over." His head disappears as he flops back into his seat; you exchange a pointed glance with Chrissy as you hear him say, "Don't worry. I'll be back for the landing."

After Chrissy and Eddie had left the night of the rule break back in early May, you'd fully expected things to be awkward between you despite Steve's assurances that he wasn't angry. You'd figured that, at the very least, Steve would be distant or cold to you or Eddie, or that he might decide he wants to pause your arrangement. But it seems that Steve has made every effort to convince everyone things are entirely normal. In doing so, somehow, they are. 

At home, Steve is attentive and cheerful. He began a new habit of making dinner for you both on Thursday nights. He texts you whenever he's going to be home late, as well as throughout the day when you’re apart— sending you pictures that remind him of you, checking in on your work day, responding to your Tiktoks, or sometimes just leaving you cute little messages that make you giggle in the staff room while you eat your lunch. And when Steve’s hazel eyes shine as he holds you close and kisses your forehead, you feel a low flutter in your belly. You nuzzle into his chest, inhaling citrus and sea salt as he tells you he loves you. 

He says it all the time.

Group play still occurs at least once a week, and you can't detect any tension between Steve and Eddie. You figure they must have spoken privately soon after what happened, and you're relieved that Steve is full of broad grins, affectionate back claps, and friendly banter whenever they're together. You know that must put Eddie at ease. Though he hadn't breathed a word about it since you'd texted that night, you're sure he'd been upset to have angered his friend.

When your phone had buzzed the morning after the incident, your first instinct was confusion, thinking that Eddie was texting you again; he never texts you during the day. But you'd been even more confused— even nervous— to see it wasn’t Eddie. Your heart hammered at the sight of Chrissy’s name, and you'd swipe open her message before even turning your alarm off. You were expecting the worst— accusations, bitterness, anger, something— but you were left floored at what she'd actually said.

'Hey, hon! Just wanted to check in and see how you're doing today. I hope you're not still upset and that Steve's okay, too. Just know I'm here for you.' She'd followed it up with a few sparkly pink hearts. 

Chrissy's thoughtfulness struck you hard, and you found your eyes pricking with the sting of guilty tears at the utter lack of sourness in her message. 'I'm okay,' you'd replied. 'Steve and I talked last night, and he's okay, too. I really appreciate you texting.' You pause, lips twisting with remorse, shame sinking in your chest until you add, 'I feel like I owe you an apology. If I'd moved faster, this all could've been avoided. I'm sorry.'

You bite your thumbnail as you wait for Chrissy's response, but it comes quickly enough to stop your doubt from spiraling. 'Oh, babes, don't apologize!! It totally happens, and I'm not mad at all! Maybe next time, try squatting instead, so you have more leverage to push off when you need to. With more practice, you'll get used to it. You'll be a pro in no time." She'd sent a few kissy faces and heart emojis, enough that the guilt inside settled quickly, quelled with the force of her bubbly kindness.

'Thanks, Chrissy.' You'd sent her a heart too. 

And, by some act of fortune, that had been that. You hadn't spoken of the rule break since, nor had you noticed any lasting repercussions on your group dynamic. Chrissy is still insistent on constant attention, but not any more so than she had been before. Eddie is still attentive but happy to go with the flow, as usual. And even Steve has continued to behave exactly the same. He isn't possessive when you go to Eddie, and Eddie goes to you. And, in fact, Steve shocks you even more when he suggests you all take a mini-vacation together: a weekend getaway to Miami in early June.

It's a much-needed respite from the drollness of your weekly routine working at the pediatrician's office; a lovely way to kick off the start of warm weather. You've never been to Miami, and you're eager to share in the new experience with Steve and your friends.

You're half-expecting the other shoe to drop when Steve sits you down at the kitchen table a couple of days later, regarding you seriously. But the conversation isn't a rehashing of the rule-break you'd feared it would be. Instead, Steve calmly and quietly explains that he wants to pay for Eddie and Chrissy's half of the shared hotel room and their plane tickets. You think of the text message Chrissy received from her mother, sympathy churning as the understanding passes between you— that you both have some knowledge of your friends' financial troubles but won't discuss it. You take Steve's hand, squeezing it tight as you tell him you admire his generosity, that it's one of the things you love most about him. Though he protests, you insist on paying for your share of the trip, wanting to do something to contribute. Steve's hazel eyes shine as he kisses your hand, and the way you move together that night, just the two of you, is more tender than it's been in quite some time.

Ahead of your trip, you and Chrissy spend an afternoon at the mall, and it's just as delightful as your first girls' trip had been. The mini-vacation is short— just a weekend— and because Eddie can't take off from work, you’ll be flying on Friday night after his shift. This means you only have two days and one night to plan for, and you decide to purchase a new bathing suit and an outfit for Saturday evening. Chrissy doesn't want anything, though you offer to pay; she insists that she has plenty in her closet she still hasn't worn from last year, and it would be wasteful to get something new. You suspect it's an excuse, but you kindly let her hide behind it anyway. Just like last time, Chrissy encourages you to step out of your comfort zone, and you end up leaving the mall giddy with your daring new purchases.

Soon enough, the first week of June arrives. The days zip to Friday, you zip to the airport, and now here you are, Switch balanced on the armrest between you and Chrissy as she coos and squeals over how cute Animal Crossing is. She's adorably attentive, and you find yourself both grateful and endeared as she lets you show her every inch of your island: all the fish and bugs you've caught, now displayed in the museum; all the rooms of your heavily-decorated log cabin; all the flowers and landscaping around your villagers' houses. Between playing and explaining to Chrissy what you're doing as you do it, the three hours pass by almost absurdly quickly.

True to his word, Eddie pops back around for the landing once the flight attendants have strapped in out of sight, grinning down at you from above the seatback like the Cheshire cat as you eye him flatly.

"Does he never listen?" You ask Chrissy, and you share a long-suffering glance, crossing your arms in a nearly synchronized show of exasperation.

"No," Chrissy replies flatly at the same time that Eddie protests, 

"Yes!" He pouts, gaze darting between you both. "I listen—"

"When it suits you," Chrissy interjects, and you roll your eyes at the wolfish grin that splits Eddie's face.

"Precisely," he says, sounding utterly pleased with himself as you feel the skid-thunk of the plane landing on the tarmac.

Between your long night of packing on Thursday, your half day at the pediatrician's office, the long lines at the TSA, and the long-ish flight, you're now left thoroughly exhausted, swaying on your feet in front of the hotel check-in desk. Eddie is the only person who looks more tired than you— there are deep, dark circles under his squinty eyes as he leans his hands against the counter, elbows locked to keep himself upright. When you get your room, it's with silent agreement that you all prepare for bed. The guys strip down to underwear, you change into your pajamas, and Chrissy sheds all her layers to sleep nude. You don't even take a moment to examine your surroundings before you collapse into the bed furthest from the door, legs stretching against the luxurious sheets as Steve cuddles up behind you. He wraps you in warmth and the familiar scent of citrus and sea salt cologne that still clings to his skin.

You're asleep within seconds, and the pleased smile that kisses your lips lingers the entire night you spend in Steve's arms.

–

You wake to a balmy breeze and luminous sunshine flowing through the gauzy curtains. It's much earlier than you'd normally rise on a Saturday— early for everyone, you figure, especially Eddie, who looks like the walking dead with that nest of tangled curls around his head as he shuffles off to the bathroom. 

As tired as you were last night, you have yet to examine your hotel room. You know the sheets are crisp and smell pleasantly like fresh laundry, and the tile floor is pleasantly cool under your bare toes, but that’s about it. Now, you can see that the room isn't too big, but it has two full beds, a closet and a dresser, and a fairly sizeable bathroom. You’re glad Steve decided to spend up for the location as opposed to the size of the room— it’s clean and seems to have high-quality linens, which, in your opinion, is all that really matters, especially since you’re only staying here for two nights. There is also a balcony facing the ocean, only a block away. You catch peeks of the water from the sliding glass door when the long curtains billow, and you smile when you consider how nice it'll be to sit out there with a glass of wine or, perhaps, with a coffee on Sunday morning.

It's morning now, but you don't have time to indulge in a lazy morning coffee. You'd all decided to make the most of your two days by jamming as much as possible into this one and then leaving tomorrow open to relax a little after an expected late night tonight. First order of business: get to the beach soon to snag a good spot.

You glance towards the other bed to see Chrissy still nude as she riffles in her suitcase. You do the same, digging for your bathing suit: a bikini the deep yellow-orange of a ripe sunflower, bottoms cut high on your waist to show off your wide hips, and top constructed of simple, delicate triangles that reveal more than they conceal. It's much skimpier than you're used to, and you feel a flash of doubt now that you're actually here, thinking about wearing it in public. That self-consciousness had been quelled by Chrissy's eager enthusiasm when you'd picked it out together, but it resurges now. You quickly retrieve your coverup: a long flowy dress, loose but cinched with a dainty tie at the waist. It drapes over you sumptuously, reminding you a little of a Grecian goddess— light, cool, something you can both feel comfortable and half-hide in. Your compromise to yourself when you'd packed, which you're intensely grateful for now. 

You'd gotten used to these people seeing your body— Steve, who's donning navy swim shorts with little sailboats on them, messing with his hair in the full-length mirror; Chrissy, who's laid her even skimpier white string bikini out on the bed, ready for her once she finishes applying her suntan oil; and Eddie, who's rubbing sunscreen into his inky tattoos with care that seems out of place coming from him, pink tongue peeking between his lips in concentration. You may be used to them seeing you, but with that discomfort now wriggling in your belly, you don't follow Chrissy's lead; you duck instead into the bathroom to get changed.

Steve pokes his head past the half-closed door to find you with your foot up on the tub's rim, rubbing the white of your sunscreen away. You see him in the mirror, and he returns your smile. 

"Want me to do your back?" 

"Yes, please," you reply. He moves close behind you, fingers warm as he thoroughly rubs the lotion into your back, careful not to miss any spots. When he's done, you offer to reciprocate.

"Nah, I'm fine," Steve says, grinning at you. "I'm trying to work on my tan."

You eye him with fond exasperation. "You know you can still get tan with sunscreen," you point out, careful to avoid getting sunscreen on your dress as you lift it over your head.

You can hear the smile in Steve's voice behind you while you watch yourself tie the string beneath your breasts, adjusting the fabric til it drapes how you want it to. "It's not as good, though," he says lightly, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head. 

"If you say so," you say dryly, emerging to find Chrissy with her hair now in a springy ponytail, sunglasses perched on her head, beach bag slung over her shoulder. 

"Ready?" she asks brightly, and you notice she isn't really wearing a coverup— just an entirely sheer skirt slung low on her hips, meant to entice more than anything else. She must be serious about her tan, you think, watching as she drops the bottle of suntan oil into her oversized bag. You grab your own tote and slip on your sandals, glancing at Eddie as he says, still sleep-hoarse,

"As I'll ever be at this godforsaken hour." He's facing away from you, hair pulled into a low messy bun at the nape of his neck, and your face crumples in amusement as you notice that, despite how fastidious he'd been about his tattoos, the sunscreen applied to the rest of his body seemed to be slapped on haphazardly— streaky, still white on his shoulders and the backs of his calves. You suspect that if you were to touch the middle of his back where he can't reach, it would be completely dry.

"Hold on," you sigh. Eddie half-turns, eyeing you curiously as you approach him determinedly.

"What're you doin'?" He mumbles, brown eyes still hazy with sleep. You press your fingers to his shoulders to straighten them again, so he's facing away from you. 

Brisky, you squeeze sunscreen into your hands, replying with amusement, "How could you be so careful with your tattoos and so sloppy with the rest of you? Unacceptable."

Eddie huffs but holds still as you rub sunscreen into his shoulders, using the back of your hand to push up his bun so you can get his neck too. "D'you know how much pain I endured to get these bad boys? No way am I lettin' 'em fade." 

"Well, you should pay the rest of your skin the same respect. With how pale you are, you would absolutely burn to a crisp out there." You work quickly and clinically, smoothing your hands over Eddie's sides and the small of his back before kneeling so you can get his knees and calves where they're exposed beneath the black trunks slung low on his hips. When your cold fingers sneak up under the hem to cover the bottom inch or so of his thighs, Eddie yelps, leg twitching away from your touch. 

You twist your lips against a smile as he grumbles, "Your fingers are cold."

"Oh, don't be a baby," you retort lightly, patting him on the back of his calf when you're done. "There. Now you won't get skin cancer." He huffs again, brown eyes flashing as he twists to regard you flatly when you straighten. You beam at him. "Thank you, y/n," you prompt him, exaggeratedly cheeky.

Despite himself, a corner of Eddie's lips quirks then. "Thanks, I guess," he says, as you don your tote again. Steve slings his arm around your shoulders, and you smile up at him as he tugs you close. 

"Now we're ready," you announce— and with that, you all set off for the gleaming sands of Miami's beaches.

–

The nearby lifeguard stand— which is more a full structure with a spiraling staircase than a stand— is bright pink, orange, and green, the gaudiest you've ever seen as you all traipse over the sand onto South Beach. Despite the early hour, it’s already teeming with people setting up their chairs and umbrellas and towels, preparing for a day rife with the promise of summer fun. You all settle on a spot not too far from that flashy landmark, and you gaze out at the water as the breeze ruffles your dress and hair. Your eyes are fixed on the clear turquoise of the water, the line where it meets the periwinkle of the sky dusted with fluffy clouds. A perfect beach day.

Despite the alluring color of the water, you sink into one of the two folding beach chairs Steve sets up, supplied by the hotel. In front of you, Eddie flops stomach-down onto the towel he's laid haphazardly against the sand; beside him, Chrissy sits much more gracefully, leaning back on her palms as she stretches her bare legs, sheer skirt abandoned as soon as you'd chosen your spot. "Oh, this is so nice!" she exclaims, and you can't help but wholeheartedly agree as you reach into your tote bag for your beach essentials: a new book and your AirPods.

The sea breeze is balmy, and the sun plays between the shifting clouds, bathing you in relaxing warmth as you dig your toes contentedly into the sand. Despite the many strangers around you, the beach is not yet too loud. Everything feels subdued, dream-like almost, so you keep your earbuds out and instead listen to the chorus of the rhythmic waves and the distant cries of seagulls, letting them become your soundtrack for now. Steve's broad hand rests comfortably upon your knee, nearly hot through the light fabric of your dress, and his thumb traces a random pattern. Your head tilts as you sigh, a smile playing on your lips, eyes heavy with the peace of this moment as you glance at each of your companions: Chrissy stretched out to soak up the rays, skin glistening with suntan oil; Eddie with his curly head pillowed face-down on his arms, body so slack you suspect he's probably fallen back asleep; and Steve at your side, hazel eyes affectionate as you smile wider at him. His expression softens as he regards you before murmuring, "Are you happy?"

"Yes," you answer quietly. Sincerely. "I'm very happy."

Steve seems pleased at your answer, and when you brush his hair back out of his eye, he catches your hand gently to press a tender kiss to your wrist. "Good," he murmurs against your skin, another kiss lingering until he releases your hand. Fondness bubbling up inside, you lean over towards your boyfriend; when you kiss him, Steve tastes salty from the breeze on his lips.

This is how you spend the first couple of hours or so: absorbed in your book as Steve alternates between scrolling on his phone, resting with heavy, contented sighs, and occasionally pressing kisses to your fingers as you keep reading, ensuring that you feel steadily more full with hazy contentment as he pays you unobtrusive attention. At one point, he decides to dip into the water after asking if any of you want to join him. But Eddie is asleep, Chrissy is sunbathing, and the book has just gotten good, so he goes by himself without complaint. He wanders back soon enough, noting that the water is too cold for him to venture in past his ankles.

Around eleven, you crack open the tiny cooler Steve had packed, pulling out water bottles and cans of High Noon and Corona, then snacking on chips, salsa, and orange slices. You sit with Chrissy on her blanket as she peels the flesh from her orange rinds, and Steve nudges Eddie's leg out of the way so he can join in too. Eddie wakes up then, crossing his legs as he leans forward eagerly to peer into the container. "No strawberries?" he asks, pouting lightly, and you feel affection well up as you pass him the chip you'd just loaded with salsa in recompense. He seems adequately satisfied with the substitute, and you continue to indulge in salty chips, savory salsa, and sweet fruit until you're content. 

Not long after you've returned to reading, a flurry of activity some distance away draws your attention. By the green edge at the top of the beach, some men and women around your age are mingling in a clump near a portable volleyball net.

You notice Steve eyeing the activity with interest; you smile as you see his enthusiasm. "I think I'm gonna go over there," he says, neck craning to see better. "Doesn't look like they have enough people yet."

"What's— ooh!" Chrissy's blue eyes brighten as she twists to look. "I love volleyball!"

"Wanna get in on it with me?" 

"Oh, hell yes!" Chrissy exclaims, popping up without hesitation. Steve glances at you again, brows perked behind his bangs as if he's checking for your approval. 

"Go for it," you say, chuckling as he scrambles up immediately, brushing the sand from his legs as he and Chrissy jog over toward the group. You watch them exchange words with one of them, pleased when Steve's face lights up with a broad grin, and he claps the guy on the shoulder.

You feel your left side suddenly dip as the sand shifts when Eddie tumbles into the chair beside you, drawing your attention from Steve as you flash a smile at him. You go back to watching as Steve and Chrissy choose their spots around the net, book forgotten as you follow Steve's movements with interest— the broad muscles on his back, his tanned arms stretching as he volleys the ball easily before falling into a slight crouch, coiled and poised to move wherever he needs to. When he sets up a teammate and they score the first point, you can hear Chrissy's delighted shriek from across the sand. Steve and Chrissy exchange an enthusiastic double high-five before he glances back, hand dragging through his hair as his eyes dart. And when you wave your hand high in the air, so Steve knows that you saw his set-up, the broadness of his brilliant smile warms you inside.

Beside you, that smoke voice curls against your ear. "You make him really happy, you know." You glance at Eddie to see him looking past you, brown eyes still fixed on the makeshift volleyball court, gleaming with fondness. "He'd dated around a bit since Nancy, but you're the first girl he was ever really serious about. He's been much happier these last few years since you came around."

Though the sentiment settles comfortably behind your sternum, you can't help but also feel confused. "Thanks, I'm really glad he's happy," you say sincerely before adding, "Who's Nancy?"

Eddie's eyes had drifted back toward the game, but they snap to you then, suddenly wide. "Steve never mentioned…?" Eddie's voice is a little weak before he trails off, and when you shake your head, you watch his expression go a little panicked and sheepish. "Ah… shit," he finally says, face contorting in a wince. "I guess I shouldn't have said anything."

You frown. Eddie’s behavior reveals that not only had he expected you to know about this— which means it's something Steve is keeping from you— but that he considers it to be touchy enough that he regrets mentioning it. As your book slides on your lap when you lean toward him, you close it without looking, dropping it impatiently to the sand. "Well, now you have to tell me, Eddie." You stare at him as his eyes narrow hesitantly, but your expression is unwavering. "You can't just leave me hanging after saying something like that."

Eddie sighs heavily, hands rubbing against his thighs as he looks out at the ocean. He tugs absently on a lock of his hair as he talks. "Steve dated this girl, Nancy, for almost all of high school. She's the same age as you and Chris." Your eyes are rapt to Eddie's face as he glances at you. "They got together when she was a freshman. They became really close." He shifts, facing you more directly. "You know, a lot of couples break up when they graduate, especially if one person is still in high school and one is going on to college. But Steve was committed despite things being long-distance. He even got close with her family. Went on vacations with them, shared holidays, that kind of thing." 

Eddie's eyes soften with sympathy for his friend as they dart between yours, and he adds quietly, "You know what things are like with his parents, so..." You nod, somber as you remember Steve confiding in you the broken state of his relationship with his mother and father. He tries to pretend it doesn't bother him, but you know it's still a wound, especially around the holidays. It's why you always make sure those times are busy for him and full of cheer. It helps that your parents and older sister love Steve, and he fits in seamlessly with your family.

Eddie's voice snaps you out of your musing. "Nancy's younger brother was in D&D club with me in school, so that's how Steve and I got better acquainted. And, uh… that's kind of the basics." He pauses, and you feel your stomach sink with the expression on his face. Eddie speaks slowly, carefully, as if he's treading lightly for the first time in his recounting of this story. "And then they broke up. 'Cause she… well, she cheated on him." You glance at your lap, weighed down with the seriousness apparent in Eddie's voice, how he lapses into somber silence. Clearly, this event was defining in Steve's life. Quietly, Eddie adds, "He was upset about it for… a long time." He shrugs a little helplessly, contrite. "And that's probably about as much as I should say. You could ask him about it if you wanna know more." 

You nod slowly, chest heavy with sympathetic sorrow for your boyfriend. But your mind is swirling with all you've learned, all you'd never known. "Yeah," you say, unsure whether you will. Because even though you'd told Steve everything— about the two boyfriends you'd had before him; about how you'd done stuff with them but hadn’t gone all the way before him; about how he'd been the first guy you'd ever said 'I love you' to— even though you'd told him all of that, not once had Steve ever mentioned anything about Nancy. And you feel foreboding pang deep in the pit of your stomach, mixing with the weight of your sorrow until you're too uncomfortable to dwell anymore.

You ask quickly, "Did you and Chrissy start dating in high school?"

Eddie is clearly relieved that you've dropped the subject and won't press him for more. "Yep," he replies, "she almost got away— we started dating when she was a senior."

Desperate for the distraction of a story told with typical Eddie-level theatrics, you lean your elbow on the arm of the chair and plant your chin there, tilting towards him as you ask eagerly, "How'd you get together? Don't spare the details; I wanna hear it all."

"All right," he grins, flashing eye teeth as his eyes brighten at the promise of weaving his tale. Short curls sway around his pale quartz face as he gestures dramatically. "So, picture this: Chrissy Cunningham, head cheerleader, cute as a button. The sweetest, most popular girl in school; the queen—" Eddie's voice goes all breathy with dramatic awe, "—of Hawkins High." When you giggle at his antics, his expression falls into a broad grin. "And she's dating this bible thumpin' golden boy, head of the basketball team, personal torturer of nerds and outcasts everywhere. He's the king to Chrissy's queen, the supreme douche himself... Jason Carver." 

You stifle your amused smile in an effort to say seriously, "I take it you and he didn't get along."

"Oh," Eddie says easily, "hated each other's fuckin' guts. Anyway…" he plants his elbow on his own chair arm to mirror your posture, leaning in and affecting his voice like you're two girlfriends gossiping. "So what had happened was, Chrissy was getting a little sick and tired of all the pressure to be perfect all the time. Perfect looks, perfect grades, perfect boyfriend, perfect future. So she started lookin' for ways to, ah… take the edge off. Let loose a little bit." He eyes you cautiously, letting his voice trail into implication. "You know…" 

You assume Eddie is probably talking about drugs, though he seems to be reluctant to acknowledge it outright. "I get it," you say dryly, though not unkindly, and his lips tilt in a little smile before he continues. 

"So that's how we started talking. And what began as a little bit of business turned to some steamy meetings at the picnic bench in the woods outside school, and, ya know… this lead to that, and the rest is history." He smiles broadly. "So the queen of Hawkins High left the king and started dating the freak."

Eddie says the word 'freak' with the utmost lightness, but the word strikes you immediately. You frown, nose wrinkling as you repeat him incredulously. "Freak?"

"Yeah," he replies casually, lounging back, stretching his lanky legs comfortably. "That's what they called me."

You blink rapidly as you're left reeling with the absurdity of it— that someone could look at the gorgeous man sitting beside you and call him a freak. You scoff, mouth working soundlessly until you can finally speak, unable to keep from sounding appalled. "What, 'cause you… you were into heavy metal and, like, had your ears pierced?"

Eddie chuckles a little weakly, brown eyes darting from your stare, which is fierce with offense for him. "Well, I mean, it wasn't just that," he replies, shifting in his seat.

You swallow, leaning back and reigning in the vehemence of your reaction when you see how you're making Eddie uncomfortable. You want to question him more, to force him to tell you what else there could be to justify them calling him something like that. But Eddie's brown eyes are clouded, a little frown creasing between his dark brows as he taps his fingers against his thigh. You decide not to pry. "That just seems so… bizarre," you say. "That people would still think like that."

Eddie chuckles again, a little wry but not as weak this time. "Small-town Indiana, you know? It's like they're stuck in the fifties. Everybody's gotta be a certain way, or else."

"Well," you reply, smiling gently as he looks at you again when you say sincerely, "I'm glad Chrissy didn't fall into that stupid trap. You guys seem really good together." Fondness blooms in your chest when Eddie smiles back.

"It's been five years now. Moved in together near the end of last year, actually. It was a bit of an adjustment at first, but it's been good." 

Your eyes glint with mischievousness then, and you can't help but tease, "Wait, let me guess: you're a roll-under instead of a roll-over toilet paper guy, aren't you?" 

Eddie feigns a gasp, pressing a hand to his inked chest. "How dare you accuse me of such wretchedness."

You giggle, and he breaks the affronted act quickly, the husky sound of his genuine laughter warming you inside, fluttering low in your belly. You eye Eddie for a moment, realizing that this is the longest and most open conversation you've probably ever had with him. And there's something that's been nagging at you, especially since Chrissy had checked in so kindly with you after that night Steve got mad. It's something you were never going to bring up to Chrissy, but considering how forthcoming Eddie's been this morning, maybe he'll be receptive to you asking. "So, when we went to see Avatar back in May, I accidentally saw this text from her mom. Is Chrissy, like… okay?" 

Eddie sighs heavily, rubbing the back of his hair as his expression falls slightly. "Yeah, she's… she's okay." He glances away again. "She has a rough relationship with her parents, especially with her mom. 'Member how I said she had all that pressure, and that's why we started talking?" He glances briefly at you to see you nod. "They had all these expectations for what they wanted her to do with her life— go to church every Sunday, train hard for cheer while also getting perfect grades, go to the best college, marry Jason, all so she can become just like them. Look this way, say that thing. Be their perfect little… robot. And she just got sick of it. She didn't wanna do it anymore." 

After a brief pause, Eddie slumps a little lower in the chair, rubbing at his knuckles. And his voice, when he says this, is so casual— but the way it affects you is anything but. "You know, sometimes, I think Chris wanted to stick it to her parents, and that's why she started dating me: Mr. Bad Reputation. But it's been five years, and she hasn't left me yet," he jokes, lips stretching with a grin even as you frown, retorting immediately,

"I don't see why she would ever leave you, Eddie. I mean, what's not to like?" 

For a long moment, Eddie is quiet. Those brown eyes, normally so bright and lively, stay stuck on his hands as he fidgets with his fingers and ruddy knuckles. You figure he must be missing his typical rings, left back in the room to remain untarnished by salt water. He doesn't look at you, but your eyes are riveted on Eddie's downturned face, pale quartz framed by dark ink curls. 

And then Eddie finally meets your gaze, face a mask of bland indifference. "I sold drugs all throughout high school. I failed senior year three times and only passed by the skin of my teeth. Obviously, I never went to college." You blink, almost wanting to look away at the baldness, the flatness of his words. The utter lack of feeling that feels so wrong coming from Eddie. "I grew up in a trailer park. I lived in low-income housing 'til I was twenty-three. And now, I'm a mechanic who can't afford to take one day off for a vacation." He huffs a humorless chuckle, quirking a sardonic brow as he stares at you. "Need I go on?"

Speaking can often be difficult for you. You usually fight to find the right words to say.

But looking into Eddie's eyes, the most beautiful shade of brown you've ever seen, you don't need to fight now. Not with these words. These words surge straight up from the bottom of you, from that hidden place grown lush with deep roots and slowly blooming greenery that now strains from the soil, leaves quivering, bending toward the man at your side. They burst from your mouth, and you don't even have to think about them. "Eddie. First of all, you're ridiculously talented and so passionate. It's like… electric to watch you perform. And you're funny. When we went to get ice cream that first time we met, I was nervous it would be awkward 'cause I usually don't know what to say around people I don't know. But you just have this way of making people laugh and feel at ease. You pretend you're all mean and scary because you listen to metal, but you're actually so incredibly kind. Plus, you're probably the realest person I know. Totally authentic and unapologetically an absolute weirdo." And your eyes, which once had darted from the intensity of this man beside you, from the light that shines within him— they don't flit away, not even once. Fiercely, determinedly, you finish your speech. "So. Like I said. What's not to like?" 

There is another long pause as Eddie stares back at you, expression unreadable, blank aside from a little crease between his brows. You regard him calmly, patiently; you refrain from pressing him for a response, letting Eddie take his time to consider what you said. And you think, as the moment lingers, that perhaps you'll see it again: that pink on Eddie's black and white, the gentleness blooming out from his eyes, maybe now beginning to soften his features. Tentative hope builds as he holds your gaze, eyes darting between yours. And when Eddie's eyes dart to your lips, your heart thumps hard, moths fluttering; you scarcely dare to breathe.

But when Eddie's eyes meet yours again, he just shrugs one shoulder, letting it fall sharply as he looks away. When Eddie turns from you, he leans his chin in his palm, hunching forward; your stomach swoops with disappointment at his lackluster response, brow crumpling until you notice his knee bouncing erratically, hand fisted against his leg, knuckles white with the force of his grip. Your disappointment transforms to empathy as you watch him— tense, nostrils flared, brow tugged low over his brown eyes. 

You realize that Eddie just doesn't know what to do with what you said about him. He doesn't know how to react to you hearing all the negative things he revealed about himself and excusing them entirely, focusing plainly on his good qualities. The ones you suspect that, maybe, Eddie has trouble seeing in himself. And you think about all the times Eddie has helped you through your own hesitance and anxiety, reassuring you in that calm way that almost seems like it would be unnatural coming from Eddie Munson, but has always felt right, just felt like a part of him. 

Here is an opportunity for you to return Eddie's consistent kindness.

You move to stand in front of him, blocking Eddie's view of the ocean with your body. His brow crinkles as he looks up at you, fingers still curled over his mouth. "All right, you," you say brightly. "We're going for a walk on the beach. Maybe if you're lucky, we can get your pasty ass a tan." 

Eddie's frown softens fractionally when you grin at him, but he doesn't move, expression a little skeptical. You hold out your hands expectantly, wiggling your fingers until Eddie, rather reluctantly, puts his hands in yours. "Come on, then—" your voice goes tight as you haul him up. "Holy— you're heavier than I thought you'd be," you pant, shaking out your arms dramatically as Eddie finds his footing. Those brown eyes are no longer as flat now, instead twinkling with slight amusement as you grab your phone and your AirPods case, presenting one earbud to him with a flourish. When Eddie doesn't reach out to take your offering, you snatch his hand, pressing it into his palm.

"What's this for?" he asks, staring down at the white bud.

You navigate to the Spotify app on your phone. "Have you never gone on a beach walk listening to music like you're in an indie teen movie?"

"Uh—" Eddie huffs a chuckle. "Can't say I have." 

"Oh, you're missing out." When you see him eyeing you with skepticism, you roll your eyes exaggeratedly. "Look, I'll put my Spotify on shuffle. It'll be, like, seventy percent me, thirty percent you."

Eddie's laugh is genuine again, and you bask in the sound. "Somehow, I doubt that percentage," he retorts, though he gamely acquiesces, fitting the bud into his ear. 

"Oh, ye of little faith!" You drop the case and your phone into your deep dress pocket and lead the way; they bounce against your thigh as Eddie falls into step with you. The first song begins with an eerie tinkling of bells before the guitar comes in, harsh and aggressive. You tilt your head as you eye him, saying smugly, "See?"

Eddie raises his hands, a grin tugging at his full lips. "I eat my words, sweetheart," he concedes, and your heads bob in time to the beat as you walk along the beach listening to The Summoning by Sleep Token. It strikes you as exceedingly amusing that, while everyone around you is casually lounging around on the beach in sunny Florida, you and Eddie are listening to eerie wailing and a heavy-metal singer husking, 'You've got my body, flesh and bone…' You giggle as Eddie gets really into it while he walks, strumming his invisible guitar and tossing his head until some more curls fall loose from his bun. 

You walk in silence, soaking in the instrumentals until the dreamy soundscape interlude subsides into a funk breakdown, and the singer croons, 'Oh, and my love, did I mistake you for a sign from God?' "This is my favorite part!" You tell Eddie, eyes bright with enthusiasm as you turn to him. 

You read his expression as both amused and impressed. "Okay, y/n. I see you. This part is sexy."

Eddie grins wolfishly as you flush, cheeks heating as you purse your lips; you walk a little faster, so he has to lope with longer steps to keep up. You hear him chuckling to himself but choose to ignore it.

The next song is Slow Mover by Angie McMahon, and within the first ten seconds of hearing her drawling voice, Eddie remarks, "Now I feel like I'm in an indie teen movie." You aren't sure whether he's being critical, but his expression is only slightly wry as he twists to walk backward in front of you instead of by your side. "Feel like I'm the main girl who's recklessly hitched a ride on a train, runnin' away from home towards the inevitable homelessness waiting for me in the city."

It takes considerable effort to keep your expression neutral while you say this, but by some miracle, you manage it. "Well, you certainly have the hair for it."

Eddie's eyes widen in delight even as his mouth falls open in outrage. "You sayin' I have hobo hair?" He makes to grab your waist, but you dodge him with a shrill shout, giggling. "Might have to rescind your nickname if you keep criticizing me. You'll be sweet girl no longer."

"No!" You whine softly, pouting up at him as you let him snatch you around the middle. "Anything but that." You're joking, but you're also not, though you giggle again as Eddie shimmies you playfully back and forth.

"Then be nice," he says warningly, and you nod your obedience quickly, eyes wide and beseeching. "'Kay then. I'll trust you," he says, releasing you so you can continue your wandering path along the beach. 

As Angie sings, 'Friend, oh friend, I am a slow, slow girl,' you catch Eddie's brown eyes twinkling. "You are a slow girl," he says cheekily. "You're walking slow."

You pout, protesting his unfair assessment. "It's hard to walk on dry sand!" 

"Then let's walk down there," Eddie offers, and you dip down to the water's edge, sand wet and pliant between your toes as you squish along much more easily. As a wave recedes, you see a sudden small object scuttling away from you. 

"Look! A crab!" You exclaim, grabbing Eddie's forearm. Excitement surges as you trace its frantic path with your eyes until it disappears into the surf. You turn to Eddie, eyes shiny with innocent delight. His arm is warm under your fingers, and the breadth of his answering smile— the way it dimples his cheek and crinkles his brown eyes like the sun itself is shining in them— makes those wings flutter low in your stomach again. 

You suddenly realize that you've wandered far enough that the pink and green and orange lifeguard structure is no longer visible; you and Eddie are alone, surrounded only by strangers. The only other time you've ever been truly alone was when you'd gone to get ice cream the first time you'd met him. The flutters surge a little harder at the realization, but you don't have any time to process as Eddie says suddenly, "Let's go in the water."

Your hand falls from his arm, eyes darting to take in just how many strangers surround you. The answer is very many; the beach, by this time, is quite crowded. And while you aren't afraid of Eddie seeing you in your new bathing suit, that self-consciousness from the hotel room resurges at the idea of baring yourself to the possibility of stares and flickering expressions.

Your hesitance softens as Eddie moves closer, and suddenly all you see is that face you treasure: strong jaw, soft nose, full lips, wide brown eyes framed by long lashes. Dark curls that tumble around his shoulders when he pulls the band from his hair, slipping it onto his wrist instead. "Come in the water with me," he coaxes you, smoke voice quiet and gentle. And as you breathe it in, it soothes the discomfort, settling full and rich in your belly.

You nod, retrieving your phone and AirPod case from your deep dress pocket and putting away your earbuds. You let Eddie's nimble fingers pull the bow from the tie at your waist, and carefully, he gathers the flowy fabric, lifting it until your sunflower-yellow bikini is revealed. The bathing suit is more daring than anything you've worn in public before, and you feel like every inch of your softness is exposed, each vulnerable part of you on display. You take the dress quickly from Eddie's hands, folding it to give you something to occupy yourself with. You drop it to the sand beside you, gritting your teeth as you bend to tuck your phone and AirPods beneath the fabric, trying not to think about how crunching over probably makes your body look unattractive. 

But when you straighten, your eyes widen to see how Eddie's looking at you. His gaze is milder, more controlled than usual, but you still respond to the heat behind his dark eyes as they caress your body silently. He swallows thickly when your breathing quickens, eyes drawn to your breasts as they rise and fall visibly. Though the way Eddie is looking at you has dispelled your discomfort about strangers' judgments, this moment is quickly becoming tense and loaded. You feel a stirring of conflicting emotions: attraction, trepidation, and excitement mixing into a jumbled mess behind your sternum, underpinned with sluggish guilt oozing anew in your gut. 

Because you're alone with Eddie. And though a thrill races through you at the thought, you know you should not be thinking about kissing him right now. 

Rule number one, you remind yourself, shifting subtly backward and speaking in an attempt to break the tension between you. "I don't wanna go in all the way," you tell him. 

Eddie blinks as if he's suddenly just come back to himself. "And why is that?" he asks, sounding elaborately casual.

You eye him cautiously, alarmed by the sudden twinkle in his eye, the growing tilt to his wide mouth. "Because Steve said it's cold—"

He moves so fast you have no time to react, and you yelp as you find yourself suddenly hoisted into Eddie's arms. "Eddie!" You squeak, face flaming and stomach swooping in intense embarrassment as he holds you bridal-style. "You can't carry me!"

There's a reason why you've never asked any of your boyfriends to carry you, why Steve has never even attempted to pick you up beyond a quick lift a couple of inches from the ground. The words I'm too heavy hang unsaid on your lips, and your brow crinkles pleadingly; you're silently begging Eddie not to make you say it.

"Can't I?" He challenges, and your arms wrap desperately around his neck as you scrunch your eyes shut, prepared for Eddie to concede or to halt halfway or for his arms to simply give out due to his sheer stubbornness. But when you hear splashing, you peek to see him already calf-deep in the water. "Shit," he huffs, and you feel his chuckles rumbling in his chest where you're pressed against it. "All right, I'll admit it's kinda cold."

Eddie doesn't even seem to struggle as he carries you into the ocean, and you can't pretend you aren't surprised. I guess he's stronger than he looks, you acknowledge, shoulders relaxing fractionally as he eases into the water. "Told you it was cold," you mumble sourly, and you feel him laugh again, flutters stirring as you realize suddenly how Eddie's arms are wrapped around you, supporting you solidly; how warm his sun-kissed skin is against yours; how your nose is nearly pressed to the base of his throat—

"Fuck—!"

Your yelp is cut off as Eddie stumbles on a sandbar; together, you collapse into the water.

The shock of cold nearly steals your breath until, almost as quickly, Eddie hauls you up out of the water. "Holy shit," he gasps, hands tight against your upper arms as you sputter, trying to find your footing. The sand dips down right past the bar, nearly too far to stand, but Eddie steadies you before his palms find your face, messily pushing your wet hair back where it's covering your eyes. Eddie sounds so upset as he stammers, "Shit, y/n, I am so sorry—"

But you're laughing, head tilting back as Eddie tries desperately to fix your hair, though his attempts are clumsy at best. You take over for him, dipping into the water so you can slick the length of your hair back. "It's fine," you say through leftover chuckles, eyes widening suddenly in alarm as you register the wave heading straight for you behind Eddie's back.

He registers your reaction a second before you're hit, and you both somehow manage to duck in time for the wave to pass without jostling you too much. Still, Eddie's body drifts toward yours with its force, and when you pop from the water, his arms close around your middle, holding you up higher than you could reach yourself. Almost automatically, your arms wrap around his shoulders, and your legs do the same around his hips. You cling to him, buoyant, letting him hold you in the waves.

Eddie seems relieved that you aren't mad and, even more so, delighted that you'd laughed off getting unexpectedly dunked under the cold water. "Don't worry, sweet girl," he says, playfully tightening his arms. "I've got you. I'll fight off every rip current and seagull that tries to snatch you with my bare hands." 

You giggle, matching his energy with your reply. "Thank you, oh mighty bard, for keeping me safe from the terrors of the sea." 

"Any time." Eddie smiles broadly again, looking utterly pleased that you'd played along. 

And as your gaze runs over Eddie's dark hair plastered to his cheeks and neck, his long lashes beaded with saltwater, his lips so full and pink and his brown eyes so utterly alive, longing strikes you, swift and potent. Longing that begs you to bury your fingers in those wet curls. To taste the salt on Eddie's mouth. To hold him close, bury your nose in the crook of his neck, and never let him go.

It's so powerful, the impulse, that it zips straight down to pulse hard in your pussy, fluttering the moth wings wildly on the way. You feel your face sway instinctually toward him, your eyes dipping beyond your control to his lips. And as you register the dawning realization in Eddie’s eyes when your gaze darts back to beautiful brown, you remember, suddenly, Steve's anger and sadness, the distress he'd felt at the first rule you and Eddie had broken.

And that had been an accident. What you want to do is entirely intentional.

Trepidation and guilt win out. 

As you loosen your arms and legs, Eddie releases his grip immediately to let you put some distance between you. His brow is a little pinched, eyes almost worried until you splash him lightly, lips quirking with a small playful smile. When he smiles back, splashing you boldly, you internally sag with relief.

You and Eddie spend some time playing around in the waves, but it doesn't take long for the appeal of the sun's warm rays to draw you out of the sea. You squeeze the water from your hair as Eddie shakes his like a dog; you're half-amused and half-exasperated as he sprays you with droplets. You'd neglected to bring any towels, so you slick the water off your skin with your hands as best you can; you dry your ears with the hem of your dress, offering it to Eddie so you can both listen to music on the walk back. After, you drop your phone and your AirPod case into your dress pocket without wearing it. You figure you can just carry it for now, and by the time you return to your belongings, your body will be dry enough to put it back on.

The first song on your walk back starts strong.

'You say I want to be your girlfriend—' 

The playful affectation and cheery pop beat of Hemlock Springs' Girlfriend conjure opposing reactions in you and Eddie. While your mouth falls open in a delighted smile, Eddie's nose crinkles, head shaking as he crosses his arms in front of his chest, gesturing sharply. "No. Nope. No way," he says firmly, brow crooked in dismay as you skip ahead of him, entirely unbothered by his vehement rejection of the song.

"It's really catchy!" You protest, head bopping as the synths drop in. "Give it a chance."

Eddie grumbles as he catches up to you, eyeing your swaying shoulders begrudgingly. You walk together briefly before he falls behind, and when you notice he's no longer by your side, you turn, already frowning in anticipation of more complaints about the music. But Eddie's just bending to pick something up in the sand, hand wagging in the water before he straightens and jogs to you. He shows you that he's found a small scallop shell, banded bright red and white. He offers it to you, and you take it from him delicately, happiness blooming along with your brilliant smile. "Thanks, Eddie!" you say, shoulders back to swaying as you start to dance as you walk. You stare down at your scallop shell for another moment before slipping it carefully into the other pocket of your dress.

When the song's bridge hits, you spin to face Eddie, shoulders shaking jauntily, hips wiggling as you sing along: 'Secretly, I'm aiming for a rhythm that exceeds my expectations. Am I ever gonna get it?' You affect an attitude for the second line, rubbing your shoulder against his arm as you pretend to pout before smiling widely, dancing away. 

And you aren't thinking about the people around you as your feet play in the water, the breeze tickles against your bare stomach, and your ass wobbles when you sway your hips. You're not thinking about any of that. You're just in the moment— listening to a treasured song, dancing along the beach beside a treasured person.

By the song's end, you even catch a glimpse of Eddie bobbing his head, though he stops as soon as he sees you looking. Your shit-eating grin makes him huff, but it's too late for him to pretend he wasn't getting into it. You're just about to rib on him when the next song begins— the tonal shift strikes you, and your mirth fades as the acoustic guitar introduces Stephen Sanchez's Hey Girl.

This song is very different from Girlfriend. It's introspective and sentimental. You can feel the longing in his voice when he sings, 'Hey girl, with your head in the clouds: I wanna love you, I wanna love you—'

After the poignancy of earlier when Eddie held you in the waves, this song strikes you as too raw and vulnerable. Overwhelmed, you dig your phone out of your pocket to skip to the next one, but calloused fingers on your arm stop you. "Don't change it. I like this one," Eddie says quietly, voice husky like smoke; you glance to see his eyes fixed on your hand, and you're suddenly grateful he isn't looking at your face. 

Hesitantly, you obey, throat thick with the sentiment of the song. And where there'd been a comfortable gap between your bodies, slowly, by degrees, you feel yourself drifting closer as Eddie does the same, drawn together like you're being pulled in by some invisible force. The longing inside you transforms, sharpening, turning wistful as Eddie's hand brushes yours lightly, light enough to be incidental. But when Eddie's calloused fingers nudge against yours tentatively, you know the brush is deliberate. And though you keep staring straight ahead, you weave your fingers together, holding Eddie's hand as you walk back down the beach together.

You suppose, to all those strangers watching from their towels and beach chairs, that you and Eddie look like an average couple holding hands. But you're not. You're not that at all— not average, and not a couple. Yet when Stephen sings, 'Oh good God, I'm tongue-tied, I'm a landslide when you move,' and you feel Eddie's fingers squeeze yours gently, deliberately, you can't help the tremble of your chin, the slight sting of your eyes as your green quivers, growing taller. The leaves fan, full and plush and soft with downy fuzz. And as small white flowers, tiny and delicate, open their petals, you squeeze Eddie's fingers back. Gently, deliberately. 

A tiny smile blooms on your lips as you feel his thumb rasp slowly across your skin. And all the rest of what you feel— the trepidation, the anxiety, the guilt— it all falls away as you flutter with the tender affection of Eddie's touch.

All too soon, that gaudy lifeguard stand juts ugly into the sky, and as you spot the distant yet familiar forms now sitting in those beach chairs— a hairy man in navy trunks and a petite blonde woman in a bright white string bikini— you feel Eddie's fingers slide from yours. 

The loss of Eddie's hand is acute. It pangs within you hollowly, but you school your features as you approach your boyfriend and friend, whose expressions perk as they spot you and Eddie. And just like your feet sink into the sand, you let your feelings sink down until they're concealed beneath a layer of soft, protective dirt.

"You went in the water?" Steve asks as you approach his side, dropping a quick kiss on his cheek. 

"Wasn't it cold?" Chrissy adds, though she's quickly distracted as she pops up to wrap Eddie in a tight hug. 

"Yup," you reply, pulling your lips into a small smile as Chrissy giggles when Eddie bonks her cheek lightly with his nose. "It was."

–

The afternoon crawls by in snapshots of moments. Chrissy hops on Eddie's back so he can carry her to the beach's exit. You eat lunch at a local Italian restaurant called Crust and split a honey-truffle pizza and some small plates. Chrissy feeds Eddie tiny bites of burrata and prosciutto; Steve leans into you, hand landing comfortably on your knee. You browse the shops at Bayside Marketplace. Steve offers to buy you whatever you want, and he doesn't question when you choose only a dainty gold chain— plain, with nothing hanging from it. Chrissy swings Eddie's hand as they walk ahead of you down the sandstone. Later, you and Steve diverge from them and find yourselves wandering toward the Ferris wheel. 

And as you ride it— gazing out at Miami city, at its tall silver skyscrapers and its turquoise blue waters— you sit across from your boyfriend, Steve Harrington. He's lounging back, toes wiggling in his boat shoes, hair mussed artfully from salt and wind. He is handsome. His nose is alkaline, his brows are thick and dark, and his jaw is strong, dusted by stubble. Steve works at a bank and makes a lot of money. He is athletic, and he loves basketball. He has always been attentive and generous; he gives of himself to you and his friends alike. He has an ex-girlfriend named Nancy, whom he loved and who cheated on him. You've been dating for three years. You lost your virginity to him, and you share an apartment. He's been perfect on this trip. He's made you feel so loved. You love him.

And yet, Steve Harrington doesn't make your wings flutter like Eddie Munson does.

He never has.

And yet… 

As Steve clambers over to your side, you shift on the seat to make room for him. When his arm wraps around your shoulders, you lean into his side. You drag your nails lightly over his abdomen and the fur on his chest until he sighs, humming contentedly. And when Steve ducks his head toward you, you use that hand to cup his cheek as you kiss him.

Because Steve Harrington is your boyfriend, not Eddie Munson. Eddie Munson is Chrissy Cunningham's boyfriend. And you are not Chrissy.

So it doesn't matter how Eddie makes your wings flutter.

It doesn't matter.

It doesn't matter.

It doesn't matter.

If you think it enough, maybe you'll start to believe it.

–

Throwing yourself into your preparations for clubbing wasn't just a welcome distraction— it was a necessary one. Thankfully, lounging on your bed with Chrissy, hair and bodies wrapped in fluffy hotel towels as you scroll Tiktok together, you'd managed to bury your emotions and revelations under a healthy mound of peat. It’s not enough to stifle them, but enough to keep them from surfacing when Eddie emerges from the bathroom in a puff of steam, curls dripping water down his chest to catch on the low-slung towel around his hips. 

Thank goodness for this hotel's overabundance of linens.

About an hour and a half before you plan to leave, you and Chrissy decisively oust the men from the shared bathroom. It transforms into a battleground of razors, toner, and eyeshadow palettes as you arm yourselves for your night out, meticulously readying every inch of your body. After your hair has been texturized, styled, and set, you apply your makeup side-by-side. 

It never ceases to fascinate you how Chrissy can so dramatically transform herself. Where normally she looks so young and innocent, with makeup, she becomes so fierce and sensual— almost like a different person, though you know by now that, really, it's just an extension of her inner self. Today she's opted for sharp black liner in the inner corners that extends out in a thin wing, with a swipe of metallic color on her lids and false eyelashes. Her brows are sharp, too, and she's highlighted her cheekbones to accentuate the angles and contours of her face. Bold, foxy. Totally Chrissy. 

You apply more makeup than you usually do, but you prefer something a little more subtle on yourself. You've tried bold eye makeup before, and while you are trying to step outside your comfort zone lately, you just… don't feel like yourself with it. You opt instead for a slick, nearly nude hue on your lids and plenty of mascara to accentuate the length of your lashes. You spend more time on your skin— you want to achieve a dewy, healthy flush, so you focus on blush and subtle highlight and shadow to add depth, plus a mauve, lush lipgloss that's slightly darker than your natural color. You're thrilled with the final result: it still feels like you, as if you're glowing from the inside. More ethereal.

You fawn over each other's makeup, and as you drop your towels to dress, you notice that Chrissy's efforts to get tan didn't go unrealized. Her skin looks a little more golden than it did this morning, and it accentuates the color of the mini-dress she's chosen for the night. It's a bright orange, not typical for Chrissy but entirely appropriate for the tropical location. Chrissy's dress is strapless, with large triangular cutouts at the ribs that point inwards and give the illusion she has an even smaller waist. She twists to look at herself in the mirror, and you can't help but admire her. She looks gorgeous, and you tell her so.

"Aw, thank you, babes!" She cups your face lightly in her hands and gives you a butterfly kiss with her eyelashes so as not to mess up your makeup. You carefully step into your dress, and Chrissy helps you zipper it; you feel a little sheepish as you look in the mirror, especially with just a tiny, lacy pair of underwear and no bra underneath, but Chrissy squeezes your shoulders reassuringly. "You look so amazing, y/n. This dress is incredible. I'm honestly a little jealous."

"Chris!" you exclaim, spinning to face her incredulously. "Don't even. You are a stone-cold fox. I'm serious— that dress was, like, made for you."

Chrissy beams, blue eyes shining as you flatter her. She drops a quick kiss on your bare shoulder as you examine yourself in the mirror, a small smile blooming as you accept the truth of your friend's words, truly believing them.

You do look amazing.

Your dress is satin, mid-length, with a long slit high up the side to the top of your thigh, revealing a sensual glimpse of your leg. The straps are tiny and thin, and there's a cutout beneath the bust, so it doesn't look right if you wear a bra. But your breasts sit nicely in it; there's enough support to keep you from sagging, and they look plump and natural. The color is a rich cream, like indulgent milk and honey. And, best of all, the dress fits you right— it drapes across your tummy and hips, hugging without clinging. There's no mistaking the wideness of your hips or the softness of your belly in this, but you don't feel fat. 

You feel like Aphrodite. You feel like a goddess.

And you feel even more like one when you and Chrissy emerge from the bathroom, and you come face-to-face with Steve as he turns, futzing with the hem of his short-sleeved blue linen shirt. He's wearing tailored khakis, and his hair is coiffed nicely, but what pleases you the most is how you see the moment his pupils dilate when he lifts his head to see your new dress for the first time.

His eyes drag over the length of your body, lingering in all the right spots, and you feel a little smug as he stutters hoarse nonsense before he can gather himself.

"See?" Chrissy says sweetly, and you glance to see her stepping into her stilettos, leaning on Eddie's shoulder for support. "Told you you look hot."

You don't let your eyes linger on black and white, but a flash is all you need to have your heart thumping. Because, even in Miami, Eddie just can't help himself: he's dressed in another white shirt, though this one is looser and thinner, unbuttoned halfway down his torso to reveal his guitar pick necklace and the dark ink of his chest. His black jeans are tight, his dark boots are chunky, and his rings, bracelet, and chains are the same as they always are. But his hair is, again, pulled into that ponytail. The one you'd told him you found sexy.

Considering whether Eddie had styled his hair this way because of you— or even for you— threatens to disturb the peat you'd so carefully mounded around your growth to protect it, so you pointedly avoid the thought.

Steve's hands find your waist, and you look up into his hazel eyes as he murmurs, "Baby, you look so fucking hot right now. Like…" he chuckles almost incredulously. "Holy fuck. Are you sure we have to go out tonight? Can't I just keep you here and fuck you senseless instead?"

"Steve!" you whisper, slapping his arm and flushing as your eyes dart to the couple beside you. Steve isn't talking very loudly, but for some reason, the idea of them overhearing his lascivious commentary makes you feel squirmy. But Chrissy just chuckles, hooking her thumb through the belt loop on Eddie's black jeans. 

"I mean," she says lowly, eyebrow tugging up suggestively. "We don't have to—"

"No," you interrupt firmly, though your expression is more entreating than commanding. "This is our one night in Miami. We're going."

"All right, all right," Steve chuckles, pressing a quick kiss to your cheek. "We'll go." He grins at you.

"I was promised dancing," you remind him, not quite pouting.

Eddie chimes in then, for the first time this evening. "Then dancing you will have," he says, and when your eyes dart to his and his mouth tilts in a little crooked grin, you smile back. 

And if some of the dirt shifts to reveal a bit of green or a peek of white flowers, well, could it really be helped?

-

The club Steve and Chrissy chose— picked while they were waiting for you and Eddie to return from your beach walk— seems to provide all the best Miami offers. It's saturated with fractal lighting in modern shapes and colors, deep purples, mauves, and bright golds that crisscross the floors. The effect is nearly dizzying but also entirely stunning, like you've been transported into a cocaine-laden dream. You see that the dance floor is teeming with motion as you shuffle past the bouncers, daisy-chained by your hands to carve a path to the bar. Steve hands you a vodka soda before you've even asked, and you and Chrissy start to suck your drinks down while Eddie and Steve retrieve theirs, eyes scanning the writhing crowd. The bass is pumping, and even without any alcohol yet to hit your bloodstream, you're feeling amped up by the atmosphere of the place. You and Chrissy half-shout your conversation into each others' ears as you wait for the guys to get their drinks.

When Steve's hand finds its place on your hip, you and Chrissy enact your plan: you drag the men to the edge of the dance floor, hips wiggling to a mix of standard club beats interspersed with some hip hop and Urbano. The place is packed, but you form a little four-square together, holding your own against the crowds as you dance and drink. Well, that is, you and Chrissy dance, and Steve does some approximation of dancing, and Eddie mostly stands still, head bobbing as he sips his bourbon. 

Chrissy seems used to Eddie's lack of movement; she dances around him, wiggling her ass against him or drawing her hand across his shoulder as she struts in the tiny square you've formed between you. You are perfectly content to dance alone or with your other two partners; you throw your hands up, sway together with Steve, or dance closely with Chrissy when she saunters your way. You feel buoyant and gleeful as you and Chrissy squeal, joining hands during Maneater by Nelly Furtado, singing it to each other as your men watch you with affection and amusement. This moment— surrounded by your close friends and your boyfriend, loose from drinks, effusive from dancing, comfortable in the knowledge that you look amazing— is what you'd been looking for when you first thought about taking this vacation. 

It feels just as good as you'd hoped it would be.

It doesn't take long for you to feel both a little drunk and a little hot; though the club is indoors, it's humid from the climate and the press of bodies around you, and you feel yourself growing dewy with sweat. When Steve notices you fanning your neck, he offers to take you back to the bar. Chrissy and Eddie follow, too, happy for the respite and a chance for another drink. 

As you sip on a small cup of water, Chrissy's sudden exclamation nearly startles you. "Oh, my God! I can't believe I almost forgot— see that spot over there? Kind of close to the staircase, where the rope is?" You all crane your necks to see where she's pointing. When you look back, she's nearly vibrating with excitement. "I saw on Instagram that if you hang over there, the club promoters may invite you to dance on the stage behind the DJ! And then we could end up in their photos or videos! Can you imagine?!"

You glance over to the spot she's indicated again as Steve replies. "That is pretty sick, Chris. Are you saying you wanna go over there?"

She shrugs, blue eyes wide and shiny. "I mean, it couldn't hurt, right?" She looks around the group, and when her eyes catch yours, you nod your agreement. The idea of dancing on stage does intimidate you a little. But if you're surrounded by Steve, Chrissy, and Eddie, then that might be fun. It would certainly be an experience you've never had before, and then you could say you danced on stage at a Miami nightclub. You catch some of Chrissy's excitement as she beams widely, clutching Eddie and Steve's forearms in eagerness as she taps her stilettos on the ground. "Ah! Okay! Let's go!"

Chrissy's dainty fingers close around your wrist, pulling you forward. You reach back blindly for the next person in the chain, fingers stretching until they make contact with a broad palm. But where you expect softness, you instead encounter roughness, and a quick wide-eyed glance back has you realizing that the hand you've grabbed is pale, wrist adorned with a silver chain bracelet. 

You suppress the flutters that threaten to burst when you realize that you're again holding Eddie's hand. His fingers tighten around yours, gripping a little harder as Chrissy carves a determined path through the crowd on the dancefloor, heading in a diagonal for the spot near the stairs. You remind yourself that his grip is tight to ensure you don't get separated— and, plus, his girlfriend, your friend, has your other wrist in her grasp. Get ahold of yourself. You suppress a sigh of relief when you finally reach the stairs and you can pull gently from both of their grips.

You can't deny that despite being somewhat excited about the prospect of dancing on the DJ stage, you are skeptical that it will actually happen. Yet Chrissy is gorgeous, eye-catching in her sharp eyeliner and her bright orange dress; Steve is handsome, broad and tan with artfully-tousled hair and a charming smile; and Eddie is captivating, statuesque with his pale quartz skin, alluring with those dark eyes, the roguish ponytail, and his inky body armor.

So, really, you should have known better.

You've only been dancing in Chrissy's chosen spot for about twenty minutes when a man with a shaved head, wearing a black blazer fitted with a leopard-print pocket square, approaches your group. He's quite a bit shorter than Steve and Eddie, but he exudes top-dog energy as he smirks at Chrissy. "Hey," he says smoothly, eyes darting around the group, landing briefly on all of you. Well, almost all of you. Your stomach swoops slightly as that familiar feeling creeps up your neck, prickling hot along your skin. Because you can't help but notice that the promoter's eyes skip you over, almost as if you aren't even standing there. 

His gaze lands, somewhat unsurprisingly, on Chrissy. He nods his chin toward the staircase, smirking slightly. "You interested in dancing on stage?"

Despite the squirmy feeling building low in your belly, you can't help but smile at the radiant enthusiasm that fills Chrissy's face, shining in her bright blue eyes. "Oh, my gosh! Really?" Her voice is powdery-soft, and the way she beams when he nods is so sweet that you feel genuinely happy for her. Her eager eyes dart to Eddie next, and the promoter's gaze follows. 

"How about you, guy?" He asks, but Eddie shakes his head, falling back onto one hip.

"Nah, man," he replies, lips quirked in a small sardonic grin. "I don't dance." He glances at Chrissy. "You should go, though, Chris." 

You see Chrissy pout for the briefest second, but she gets over it quickly, too excited to dwell on Eddie's denial. The promoter unhooks and lifts the velvet rope at the base of the staircase, holding out a hand so Chrissy can climb up onto the bottom step. 

That prickling heat, that low squirm of self-consciousness in your belly, is nearly gone as you anticipate the moment being over. But the promoter doesn't replace the rope. Instead, for the first time, you watch his eyes quickly flick you up and down.

You try to suppress the self-consciousness that rises automatically— try to keep yourself from reading the promoter's face to quickly assess his reaction. But you can't help it; you read it anyway. You always do. 

And there is no reaction that you can discern— no twitch of a brow or a lip, no change to the glint of his eyes. But what this man does is almost worse than if he'd made a face. After glancing you up and down, the promoter turns immediately to Steve on your left, asking, "You wanna join her?"

His utter dismissal couldn't be any more obvious to you than if he'd spit in your face.

Entirely oblivious to the subtext of the promoter's interaction— or lack thereof— with you, Steve grins broadly, running a hand through the length of his tousled brown hair. "Yeah, sure," he says smoothly, beginning to join Chrissy on the stairs. On the second step, Steve glances back, frowning as he notices you aren't following. "Wait—"

You cut him off quickly, desperate to avoid any risk of Steve asking why you aren't coming with him. Though the promoter utterly ignoring you is bad enough, forcing a conversation about it would be unbearable. "No, it's okay, Steve. I'll stay with Eddie." You're firm but not tense; you smile brightly to show you're not upset.

And Steve, God love him… in this moment, you're grateful that your boyfriend is such an uncomplicated man. "Are you sure?" Steve's hazel eyes are still hesitant, but you can tell he's on the cusp of conceding. You just need to sell it— that you're not in any way sore about him going to dance on the DJ stage without you.

"Yes!" you exclaim, smile widening, voice earnest. "Go have fun!"

"Okay, babe." Steve smiles back— lopsided, relieved. He walks back down to the two steps so he can say goodbye. "See you in, like, an hour?"

"Sounds perfect," you say decisively, leaning in so Steve can kiss you briefly. You hear the click of the fastener and feel the brush of the velvet against your belly as the promoter replaces the rope then, separating you and Steve.

You wave as you watch him and Chrissy ascend the stairs, eyes deliberately avoiding the promoter as he settles into the corner against the wall. But once they disappear, there's nothing to distract you from the reminder of his dismissal. And you feel it threatening again— that prickling self-consciousness, the low squirm of something approaching shame. 

Quickly, you turn to Eddie. "Can we get another drink?" you ask him, and as he nods mutely, you lead the way back to the bar. 

You skirt along the edge of the dance floor rather than cutting through the middle as Chrissy had, trusting Eddie to keep up with you. When you hover at the corner of the floor closest to the bar, unwilling to elbow your way to the counter, you look for Eddie then. His features are even more intense than usual in the dramatic lighting; his shoulders are set, and so is his jaw as he stops a short distance from you, staring down into your face. As the lighting shifts, you realize Eddie's brow is lightly furrowed, and his dark eyes are unreadable, not warm like they usually are. 

Something is off with Eddie. He hadn't been overjoyed when you were all dancing together, but he'd seemed content. Nothing like he is now— coiled tight as if he's reigning something in. It makes you worried.

When your eyes dart away and return to see his stare hasn't wavered, you ask quietly, "Hey, are you… are you mad or something?"

"No, I'm not mad." There is no hesitation in Eddie's quiet answer, and some of your worry eases. But when he glances away and you see a muscle in his jaw twitching, you realize he isn't done speaking. It takes him a moment, but Eddie eventually looks back at you, voice carefully neutral. "He should have stayed with you."

You frown. "I told him to go," you point out, more puzzled as Eddie's expression doesn't change.

"I know," Eddie says quietly. And the way his intense gaze is piercing you… for the first time in a long time, you have to look away from him.

You hear him sigh as you distract yourself by watching people dance, eyes running over writhing bodies. "You want a drink, right?"

You glance back to find the intensity in Eddie's stare has softened now. "Yeah," you reply, grateful for the change of subject.

"What do you want me to get you?"

You consider another vodka soda, but find you're in the mood for something different. "Um… Sex on the Beach?" you ask, blinking innocently as you watch a smirk curl at the edges of Eddie's full lips. 

His smoke voice is smooth and exaggeratedly sensual as Eddie sways toward you, eyes locked on yours. "I mean, sure, sweet girl. But what do you want to drink?"

"Eddie!" Your face flushes bright red, heat prickling in your cheeks as he laughs huskily. You slap his chest lightly before crossing your arms under your breasts; you're squirming from his teasing, but you can't help the low flutters that awaken at the thought of having sex with Eddie on the beach. Or even in the ocean, in that position he'd held you in this morning— arms wrapped around his shoulders, legs wrapped around his narrow hips, no swim trunks or bikini bottoms separating his warm skin from yours…

Stop it! You chastise yourself, huffing, glaring until Eddie stops laughing. "Sorry," he says wolfishly, not looking the least bit sorry about it. "Couldn't resist."

"Hmph." You level him with one last unimpressed look before he gently takes your wrist.

"Come on," he says, lips tilting fondly. "Stay close to me."

You follow Eddie closer to the bar, hovering near his back as he orders you the drink you'd requested and another bourbon for himself. You carry your drinks to the edge of the dance floor, standing near one another as you sip the fruity alcohol. After just the first sip, it's already so much better than your typical vodka sodas that you question why you'd never tried it before. In fact, you may never go back to vodka sodas now that you've tasted the allure of orange and cranberry with your vodka. 

When your drink is half-gone, and your head is starting to get a little fuzzy, and the sight of bodies dancing is no longer an adequate distraction, you find your thoughts drifting back to what Eddie had said. But… you made Steve go without you. You'd basically forced him to. Right? You find yourself lightly chewing on your lower lip, thumb rubbing absently against the cold glass cradled in your hands. Eddie was there. He'd heard the whole conversation, and when you pointed out that you'd told Steve to go, he'd just said, 'I know.' What was he implying? That you should've asked Steve to stay with you, to give up his fun just because you weren't going with him? 

Is that really fair of you to expect Steve to sacrifice his chance on stage for you? The idea that you could have forced the issue— pouted or begged Steve to stay— makes you feel selfish.

But maybe that's not Eddie's point. He hadn't said, 'You should have asked him to stay with you;' he'd said, "He should have stayed with you." You suddenly realize what Eddie was really trying to communicate: that Steve should have chosen to stay with you. A crease forms between your brows as that realization settles heavily upon you. It begins to coil around your ribcage, squeezing you tight as you find yourself considering a dangerous question.

Would Eddie have stayed with me?

And you find, as the thought pops into your head, that you already know the answer.

You haven't quite noticed the tension overtaking your body until Eddie's hand brushes lightly against your upper back; you flinch, wide eyes darting to his face. "Sorry," he says, withdrawing his hand immediately, and you reassure him quickly.

"No, it's fine. I was just…" you don't have an adequate explanation for what you were doing, so you just trail off, eyes darting back to your drink.

"Do you wanna go dance?"

You purse your lips as you look out at the undulating crowd, the crush of unfamiliar bodies. "Um…" you hedge, but finally admit, "Not really. I don't really wanna dance by myself."

Your eyes flash to Eddie's face as he replies, "I'll dance with you."

"Really?" you blurt. "I thought you said you don't dance."

Eddie chuckles lightly. "I don't. Not usually. But the Latin stuff is pretty good."

You assess his pleasantly neutral expression, the warmth that has returned to his brown eyes. And you read something there— in the way his gaze flicks away and back to yours, brows tugging up, mouth tilting a little further. You could be wrong, but you get the impression that despite Eddie's reasoning, he's only offering to dance because he'd noticed you were in your head. 

He's only doing it for you.

Your smile is genuine, blooming tiny on your face. "Okay," you say softly, and Eddie grins in earnest, leading the way into the crowd. 

Luckily for Eddie, the set seems to be leaning more Urbano now, and the quick mambo beat of Rosalia's Despacha is the perfect remedy for that heaviness shrouding you. You face Eddie, swaying your shoulders and hips, dancing in some approximation of a mambo as you step forward and back to the beat. Eddie gamely starts to sway, too, and you beam as you watch him make an attempt. A little self-conscious flush blooms high on his cheeks as you watch him.

"What?" he questions you defiantly, though it's softened by the self-deprecating grin tugging at his lips. "Didn't you promise to be nice? Remember, your nickname is on the line—"

"I am being nice!" you protest, voice high and giddy with mirth and excitement that Eddie is actually dancing with you. "I'm just happy. Am I not allowed to be happy?" you add plainly.

Eddie's wide grin transforms. "Of course you are," he replies, and the gentle smoke of his voice has you taking a deep, bracing breath to ward off the flutters.

"Good," you huff teasingly, trying to keep the mood between you light. "Then let me watch you dance."

He laughs, husky and full. "All right," he concedes.

And you do— you watch Eddie dance for a while, secretly delighted as he starts to move his shoulders and hips, a little tentatively at first, and then more boldly once his bourbon and your Sex on the Beach are gone. Briefly, you leave your spot to discard them on a nearby table before heading back to the dance floor together.

But when you resume your positions— facing each other with a respectful distance in between— you feel a sudden presence behind you, different from the slight brush of other dancing people. This person is facing you directly; pants rasp against your ass as his broad warmth presses boldly to you, and you're washed by the unfamiliar scent of cheap cologne as hands grasp at your body, one landing high on your waist and the other low on your hip.

You freeze immediately, heart racing, wide eyes darting helplessly to Eddie's face as his gaze flickers between you and whoever this stranger is behind you. In a split second, he's closing the gap between you, face contorted in a frown as you tug from the stranger's grasp to meet him. Eddie's arm wraps around your waist as he pulls you against him, and your instant panic eases. You breathe in smoke and apples, letting Eddie’s scent comfort you, distract you from the unexpected violation of a stranger's unwanted hands on your body. Eddie is clearly uneasy, muscles corded and taut as he stands still, holding you against him for a tense moment until you feel him start to relax.

"Is he gone?" you ask timidly, nose skimming Eddie's throat as you peek at his face.

"Yeah, he's gone." His chest rumbles against yours, and you sigh, relief flooding you as you relax into Eddie's grip. "Um…" You can see him swallow, eyes locked on the pale column of his throat as he pauses before saying haltingly, "Maybe I should, like, stay closer to you. I don't want that to happen to you again."

You shudder a breath, wings fluttering at the thought of dancing— really dancing— with Eddie. "Yeah," you say, voice small. "Yeah, I agree."

His arm loosens so you can turn. The warmth of Eddie's body radiates against your back, brushing just slightly as you start to dance again. As the club beat eases into another Latin hip-hop song, and the relaxed fuzz from the alcohol settles again in your limbs, you sway your hips, feeling Eddie move against you with little teasing brushes of his rough jeans and his loose white shirt. You shift a little closer, pressing lightly back to feel more of him— not too much, just enough to keep constant contact between you. It grounds you, offering comfort in the form of his presence. And he seems to be adapting much better like this— without your eyes on him, he moves more fluidly, and he seems to have more rhythm with these Latin songs than he did with his striptease to Pony . Maybe he was telling the truth about liking the Latin songs more, you think, a tiny smile crossing your lips as you settle into the music again.

And as you dance with Eddie, you grow used to the feeling of his body moving behind you, so that your mind starts to wander. And turned away from him, without his face to look at, your eyes drift to the people around you. To all the women in their tiny mini-dresses, their tanned legs so thin and shapely in their giant heels. To their little waists and their lithe arms, just like Chrissy. You don't want to, but you go there, back to when the club promoter's eyes flicked over you, assessing your body and finding it lacking.

Not trim enough. Not thin enough. Not pretty enough.

It's not what you want to be thinking about right now. You want to be enjoying yourself, dancing in a Miami nightclub with a treasured person. But once the thought wriggles back into your brain, there's no shaking it; you can't stop dwelling on it.

You can never help yourself when it comes to this.

Your rhythm falters; you lose the beat, and Eddie's smoky voice is quick in your ear. "What is it? What's wrong?"

You stop dancing to turn in Eddie's arms and face him. Almost as if it's automatic, his hands settle lightly on your waist, and you drape your arms over his shoulders— not holding tight, just resting there. Your mouth twists as you consider how the memory of that man's appraisal has begun to eat you up inside, devouring all the happiness you'd found here tonight. And Eddie's brown eyes are warm, and his expression is receptive. He never judges you; he's so kind. And he always tries to help you. He always does.

So you tell him what's wrong.

"I just… was thinking about the club promoter," you say quietly, speaking to Eddie's chest; you can't quite meet his eyes. "How he barely even looked at me, almost like I didn't exist to him. Well," you chuckle breathlessly, a little uncomfortable. "I obviously know why he didn't, like, ask me to go on stage. I mean—" You glance down your body before your eyes land back on Eddie's chest. "I'm not exactly… you know…" You swallow against the lump in your throat, pushing the words out, hoping that by voicing them, they'll have less power. "I'm not as small as the other girls—"

Eddie cuts you off, and your eyes snap to his face to see his brown eyes wide and incredulous. "Are you fuckin' kidding me?" He sounds utterly baffled. Utterly disbelieving. "You're… you're so beautiful. Sexy as hell, I swear to Christ." He chuckles his disbelief as you look up at him hesitantly, face still angled down. When he sees you haven’t responded, Eddie frowns; his hand leaves your waist to gently but firmly lift your chin. "Listen, sweetheart. Don't worry about that guy. That guy's probably never been with a beautiful woman in his life. Never even touched one, I bet. Probably has a shriveled little baby carrot dick."

You wrinkle your nose, half-amused, half-disgusted by the crudeness of his final remark. Eddie laughs at himself, shaking his head slightly as he ducks closer to your ear to mutter, "Sorry, but if I'm totally honest, I'm only half-checked in to what I'm saying right now 'cause I'm distracted." 

You try not to think about how warm his breath is against your ear. "Distracted by what?" 

"By trying not to pop a boner with you dancing on me, sweetheart." 

You pull your head back to stare at him incredulously, a little awkward giggle escaping your lips. And it must be clear that you don't believe him because Eddie's eyebrows flick up, and his expression shifts slightly.

"I'm serious," Eddie argues through a chuckle. "What, you think I'm joking?" Carefully, he presses his hips closer so you can feel him. And your eyes widen slightly as you do, proving how Eddie really wasn't kidding. How he's a little stiff behind the thick black denim of his jeans. 

"Oh, my God," you mutter, cheeks flushing as you purse your lips against a bashful smile. 

"See?" Eddie says, lightly teasing, but quieter now. "Told you." 

And now that his point has been made, it's the right time for Eddie to move away. But Eddie doesn't move away. And the press of Eddie's pelvis against you feels good. And he just told you that you're beautiful and sexy, and the smoke of those words is settling inside you, filling you rich and heady. And the song that's just begun is slower, more sensual than the ones before. Alluring, drawing you in, just like the brown of those beautiful eyes, the dark curls framing his pale quartz face.

Gradually, Eddie's black and his white draw you in until, almost by instinct, you start to sway your hips against his.

You feel Eddie's chest expand in a deep breath as you move against him. But, though he tenses for a split second, he still doesn't draw back. Instead, Eddie's leg shifts, slotting between yours as he starts to move with you.

The feeling of Eddie's warm body is even more tantalizing like this, facing him. You relish the feeling of his hands on your hips, fingers resting lightly as you sway together, hips rocking in rhythm with the music. You notice the tickle of his loose shirt against your chest, your breasts brushing against the fabric through sheer satin as you dance. You listen to the song: ‘Pasa el día con él, yo soy tu gato de noche.’ You don't know what it means, but your blood is heating, belly fluttering low as Eddie presses close to you— a novel feeling through your clothes and his, out here in public rather than in the security of your bedroom. And you can feel the other people around you, bodies moving, grazing lightly against yours as the space packs in. You release a breath and wonder if it tickled the sliver of his bare chest when you feel Eddie's fingers twitch on your hips.

His voice is hoarse as he mutters against your forehead. "Can I touch you more?"

"Please," you breathe, and the word is nearly a sigh of relief as Eddie's hands drag across the satin of your dress, smoothing over the small of your back. Your arms tighten around his shoulders as you press yourself closer, breasts now tight to his chest, skin sticking together where his shirt is open. The thought strikes you suddenly that Eddie is a little sweaty— you can see his hairline is damp, and his hands feel warmer than usual, damp as they drag up silk to find the skin of your back. And the impulse strikes you suddenly: the desire to lick up the center of Eddie’s chest, to drag your tongue along the ink of his armor and taste the salt on his skin. Your pussy pulses, moth wings fluttering low as you imagine it. 

As you do, inevitably, the other emotions reemerge. Trepidation. Fear. Concern for Steve's anger. Guilt over the intentionality of breaking another rule. But Eddie's hands are so tender as they rasp over your skin, and you feel so safe in his arms. And you're in the middle of this writhing crowd, cloaked in anonymity and alcohol and neon lights and sensual music. And when you press your hands to Eddie's back, dragging them up his neck until your fingers tease at the edge of his hairline— the green reemerges from your protective mound of soil, flowers quivering, moth wings fluttering with a deep and powerful yearning. One that can no longer be suppressed. 

One that surges up from the bottom of you.

Your face draws back, angling up at the same moment that Eddie's tips down. And you get only a glimpse of those brown eyes burnished to deep amber, a flash of white teeth behind full pink lips as he begins to rasp, "Can I k—?"

His words are cut off as you pull him by the back of his neck into a desperate kiss.

Eddie deepens the kiss immediately, and the brush of his tongue into your open mouth is sheer blissful relief. You moan against his lips, a little pathetic mewl that makes you rush hot with embarrassment that you'd make that sound in public. But it just spurs Eddie on; his arms haul you flush against his body as his tongue dips insistently past your lips. You taste him back, lips pressing hard as bourbon and spice fill your mouth. And somewhere in the midst of this, you've stopped dancing, and so has he, though his hands are still roving over your back, grasping at you with a desperation that matches your own. 

As you lick into his mouth, the little sound Eddie makes has you shuddering, goosebumps rushing over your skin despite the heat of the dance floor. Your heart is pounding, pussy throbbing in time; and it's so utterly wanton, but Eddie's leg is still between yours, so purely by instinct, your hips twitch, dragging yourself in a little jerk against the roughness of his jeans. 

Flutters burst low, mixing with arousal as Eddie bends you back, hands dragging firmly down to grab your ass and press your hips against him. And that— your hips twitching, Eddie's hands on your ass— is what brings you back to yourself. You become suddenly cognizant that you're currently in public, basically dry-humping this man who is not your boyfriend on the dance floor.

The realization douses you like ice water, and you pull your mouth from Eddie's with a little gasp, eyes wide, cheeks flushed. Your chest is still heaving into his, and the breath that puffs against your lips still makes you flutter, but your face is creased with hesitance now. Eddie registers the shift immediately, pulling you out of the bend, though his arms still hold you close. He's breathing hard, cheeks lightly flushed as the warm brown of his eyes meets your gaze.

"Eddie," you whisper, voice soft and regretful. "We shouldn't. Not while we're alone."

And you half–expect a bit of Eddie's black to show, for him to guard himself in a wolfish grin and joke to break the tension.

But Eddie shudders a deep breath, almost a sigh, and you see his adam's apple bob in a thick swallow. "You're right," he says quietly. "I'm sorry."

And you hate to see how those beautiful brown eyes cloud, how those full pink lips, now swollen from your kisses, turn down at the corners. Your brow tugs up as you soothe your hand softly against Eddie's cheek. "Don't be sorry," you say softly, tenderly tucking some of the short curls that brush his jaw behind his ear. 

Eddie's eyes are molten as he leans in, and your lashes flutter as he kisses your cheek, lips warm as they linger there. And though it's long been there, the growth at the bottom of you, it's the first time that you truly feel it— the unfurling of your petals, the quivering of your leaves as Eddie holds you close and presses a chaste kiss to your cheek.

And you admit now that it's fruitless to try to convince yourself it doesn't matter how you feel about Eddie. Because you know it does. You know it.

–

You're on the beach. The sand is cold now, and the ocean is a black, churning mass, nearly indistinguishable from the night sky. The breeze is no longer balmy; instead, it chills you, cutting straight through your milk and honey satin. Arms cradle you from behind, partially shielding you from the sting as they hold you against a firm body. Your hands rest perfunctorily on the forearms encircling your waist, and your head is tipped back against the chest behind you. Citrus and sea salt lingers in your nose.

You're waiting for the fireworks to begin.

Chrissy's stilettos are loose. One of them tipped over when she dug her toes into the fine sand, and you stare at them to avoid looking at the couple beside you. You feel the rise and fall of Steve's chest as he breathes behind you. You feel the warmth from his body along the length of your spine. 

You feel the tilt of your green as it strives, reaching, searching for smoke and ink.

Your eyes are drawn to the sky with the first whistle and pop. Big and small, circular and narrow, red, pink, and orange arches— colors burst against the darkness in a rain of sparks that fizzle toward the water. It's enchanting, a stunning display of corporeal magic.

You're no longer watching it.

Instead, your eyes are fixed on black and white. 

Chrissy's arms are around his waist, clinging to him tightly, her back turned to you as she rests her cheek against his chest. Eddie's chin is on top of Chrissy's head, and his eyes are turned up to the sky. You can see the reflection of the fireworks in Eddie's eyes, and this is how you watch the show.

You can't help but notice that Eddie looks pensive. Melancholy, almost, as he watches the magic show. You think of his fingers squeezing yours gently, deliberately, as you listened to that song, walking together along the beach. You think of the tightness in his jaw when he told you Steve should have stayed with you at the club. You think of the dullness in his brown eyes when he apologized for kissing you, for breaking the first rule.

A flick and Eddie's dark eyes no longer reflect the colors in the sky. Instead, they're caught on yours, staring back as you watch him. And when you see it— the intensity of his gaze, the same intensity that your eyes had darted from earlier— you no longer look away.

The light show ends. A smooth voice behind your head asks, "Do you guys wanna head back to the hotel now?"

You are the first to speak. "Yes."

And when I meet the band

They ask "Do you have a man?"

I can still say "I don't remember"

Bejeweled — Taylor Swift

Differences Between Butterflies and Moths

July 11th, 2019 — Australian Butterfly Sanctuary

Although both of these fluttering insects come under the classification Lepidoptera, they possess many differences that classify them as a butterfly or a moth.

Wing Position: One of the most obvious differences between butterflies and moths is their resting wing position. Moths rest with their wings open, whereas butterflies tend to rest with their wings closed. However, many butterflies "sun bake" with their wings open. This allows them to attract more sunlight.

Nocturnal vs. Diurnal: Butterflies are active during the day (diurnal), whereas moths are active at night (nocturnal).

Pupae: In the metamorphism from caterpillar to butterfly, caterpillars spin a pupa consisting of hardened protein. On the other hand, moth caterpillars form a soft silk pupa, which is known as a cocoon.

General Appearance: Widely speaking, moths tend to be stockier and have furry bodies, whereas butterflies are smooth and lean.

Colour: In general, moths tend to be duller and less vibrant in colour, with less intricate and striking patterns. Although this is a generalised rule, some moths, such as the Madagascan Sunset Moth are incredibly striking.

–

Frizzy curls, blonde waves, floppy bangs. Citrus, smoke, and a puff of expensive perfume. Blue and hazel and brown. Sighs or moans, breathy or hoarse, stifled in throats or muffled against skin. Smooth— from one to the other and back again. Easy, leisurely exchanges. As near to effortless as it could be.

In the weeks following your first time with penetrative sex, group play has become open and fluid. Chrissy with Steve, you with Eddie, you with Steve, Chrissy with Eddie— you rotate positions and shift combinations of people with ease. It seems almost natural to feel Chrissy's lips on your neck while you kiss Steve, to wrap your fingers around Eddie's length as he licks Chrissy. You eagerly anticipate Friday nights, letting the promise of mutual pleasure carry you through your long work days at the pediatrician's office. 

And you hadn't felt the sour bite of jealousy since that first time, either. You suppose you must be getting used to seeing Steve having sex with Chrissy, which is quite a relief. You didn't want to have to deal with those feelings escalating, dreading how it would impact your friendship with her and your group sex arrangement.

You and Chrissy have fallen into an easy rhythm when playing with your men. Sometimes you'll begin by cuddling with each other, giggling over something stupid one of them has said or a Tiktok video she'd sent you earlier that day. Sometimes you'll kiss Steve until you feel the brush of her waves against your cheek, and then you'll happily relinquish his mouth to find a different pair of plush lips instead. Sometimes you'll blow them, sucking Eddie's thick length for as long as you feel like until you pop off him to taste your boyfriend instead, letting Chrissy's lips take your place. Or you and Chrissy will work one of them together, tongues brushing as you lick-lick-lick at their heads until their cum paints two pairs of flushed lips, or perhaps your breasts when Chrissy pushes them together with dainty fingers. 

Sometimes you'll kiss her, tasting her sweet mouth as you lay side-by-side with Eddie and Steve's faces buried between your legs. You'll swallow her moans, and she'll swallow yours, eyes hazy and skin damp as your boyfriends press their cocks inside you, happy to have someone's mouth on yours while you're being fucked. You don't directly pleasure one another, and neither do Steve and Eddie pleasure each other— it's a mutually agreed upon though unspoken boundary that none of you feel the need to cross. But you delight in Chrissy's pleasure and she in yours. And once, when she'd been splayed across your bed, waves hanging off the edge as Steve fed his cock into her mouth upside down and Eddie pumped his fingers inside her, you'd gone so far as to suck on her pert nipples, aroused by the sight of her being filled. She'd squirmed until she came, so quickly that time, keening around Steve's length. You hadn't minded because you knew she'd do the same; in fact, she'd seemed eager when Steve asked if you wanted to take her place afterward. But you'd never given an upside-down blowjob before, and it seemed incredibly intimidating after watching her. Plus, with everyone's attention on you, you knew you'd both be pressured to cum and probably unable to do so. You hadn't faked an orgasm since that one time with Eddie, and you didn't want to do it ever again. If it happened, it happened, and that would be great, but you just… didn't want to falsify your pleasure anymore. It was a small miracle that Steve hadn't noticed and confronted you about it, but you weren't going to question your luck.

This Friday night is a temperate evening in late April. The lingering bite of winter has passed, and your windows are thrown open, letting a mild breeze tickle your damp skin as Steve's tongue dips softly into your mouth. The ambient sounds of the city below— the low rush of vehicles, a distant horn, the echo of laughter and shouts from people mosying by— mix with the sound of Chrissy's airy moans as she straddles Eddie's cock, rocking on him, sharp hips cradled by his hands. Indirectly, you can feel her moving through the rhythmic push of Eddie's body as he lays flat on the bed. You can feel it because his nose is repeatedly nudging against your clit. You pull from Steve's mouth to lick your palm, returning to smoothly stroking his length, humming as Eddie's hot tongue dips inside you while you sit on his face.

Before group play, you'd been very self-conscious about this position despite Steve's enthusiastic propositions over the years. You'd been overly concerned with the size of your thighs, worried you would smother him with your weight. And despite his assurances that he'd be fine, that he wanted you to be on top of him, you couldn't get over your insecurity enough to enjoy it the few times you'd relented. But, slowly, you were becoming more comfortable with your body and with yourself. You'd become less hesitant to try something new, despite still being nowhere near as uninhibited as Chrissy is. Though you don't especially love the way she talks dirty, you do admire that she has the confidence to do it, and you find yourself sometimes trying to emulate her, if not in words, then at least in spirit. The first step to that, you'd decided, is to not automatically say no to positions you'd previously shied from.

And, oh, are you glad you hadn't said no to this. It's quite delicious to experience all of these sensations at once: Steve's long hard cock in your hand, slick with your spit; his full lips on yours, all minty and crisp; and Eddie's eager mouth on your pussy, broad tongue working you from clit to entrance. Couple that with the knowledge of the others' pleasure— the twitching of Steve's hips into your grip, the filthy murmuring of Chrissy behind you, the rumble of Eddie's groan against your slick flesh— and all the unrelenting stimuli combine until your belly begins to tighten, cinders sparking to flame. You moan against Steve's lips as Eddie tilts his chin, relishing the rasp of his stubble as it contrasts with the slick fire of his tongue now lapping at your clit. Your hand moves faster on the cock in your grasp, and Steve's breath deepens as your other hand joins the first, twisting as he thrusts forward into your strokes. Instinctually, without much thought, you begin to circle your hips, lightly grinding your pussy against Eddie's mouth. You whimper as Steve grasps your breasts, kneading them while you chase that building feeling inside you; your breath quickens with excitement and anticipation when Eddie moans, the sound hoarse and muffled into your wet heat, vibrations increasing your desire. "Mmm," you hum, a little crease forming in your brow as your hands drag along Steve's cock, pleasure running thick and sticky through your veins. It buzzes like alcohol, but headier, sweeter; not yet enough to get you to your pinnacle, but enough to make you feel really fucking good.

The sudden rasp of a calloused hand on your hip has your breath catching; you feel it snake up your side, dragging a slow trail of fire up your damp skin. The tenderness of the touch, the way it supports you as you rock your hips— instantly, the tension in your belly increases, and you start to move faster. Eddie moans again, fingers tightening against your waist, and you know that it's because he can feel you growing more excited. His eagerness fuels yours, and soon you're panting, lips pulling from Steve's as you focus on the sensation of Eddie's mouth on you. When you feel Steve's lips at your jaw, you realize that your grip has slackened, that your strokes have grown slower; you reengage your efforts, working Steve faster until you feel Eddie wiggle his face underneath you, lips searching for and then finding your clit.

You whimper as pleasure flares when Eddie sucks gently on your clit, breath shuddering as his fingers rasp tenderly over your waist, beginning to drag back down your side. Struck with worry that his touch might leave you, one hand leaves Steve to reach for him. You find his hand quickly, lightly caressing those limber fingers and ruddy knuckles in a silent plea for them to stay. You sigh as Eddie weaves his fingers with yours, his grip snug and steady as your hands press against your waist. You're burning with pleasure, muscles tightening, but as you join hands, you feel something else wash over you. The feeling is lush and verdant, blooming from that point of contact, but you aren't quite sure what it is.

"Hey," Steve murmurs, and your eyes open, darting over his face almost with surprise. He kisses you, warm and gentle, and your lashes flutter as he draws away. "Can we switch positions?"

"Really?" you ask, voice soft, neutral despite the brief flash of disappointment you feel. Unconsciously, your fingers tighten around Eddie's.

"Yeah," Steve replies, and you register the heat in his stare, the slight roughness to his voice from being worked up. "Yeah, baby, I can't wait anymore. I need to be inside you." 

Despite your brief disappointment, you pulse as Steve voices his desire for you. "Okay, babe," you reply, kissing him before you lift one leg over to kneel to the side of Eddie's head. When you glance down at his face, you're struck hard by the sight of him: dark curls splayed across your duvet; brown eyes heavy-lidded and hazy, dark with desire; inked chest rising and falling as he pants, still rocked slightly by Chrissy's body; and, most of all, Eddie's lips, swollen and pink and glistening, chin wet from the slick of your pussy. 

The sight is so erotic that you can't help but duck to him immediately, cupping his jaw as you capture those lips in a hungry kiss.

Eddie moans quietly into your mouth as you descend on him, and he tastes like smoke and spice and salty musk from the flavor of you on his lips. Your tongues brush lightly at first, but the wet heat of Eddie's mouth has you needing more almost instantly. You deepen the kiss, lips smacking, tongue seeking; one of Eddie's hands finds your jaw and the other cradles the nape of your neck as he kisses you harder, pressing up into you, also wanting more. You feel a light touch on the crown of your head, and it's not Eddie; you realize it must be Steve, stroking your hair as you and Eddie devour each other.

That slight rhythmic rocking of Eddie's body ceases; you hear a light huff and draw back from Eddie, eyes gazing into his for a moment until you glance down his body to see Chrissy sitting motionless on his lap, bow lips pursed, blue eyes clouded with a hint of petulance. 

Steve's hand leaves your head. "Don't worry, honey," he soothes her, full lips crooked with a grin. "I'll take care of you, too."

Through your weeks of playing together, you'd noticed that Chrissy has a quirk: despite her typically bubbly nature, she seems to need at least one person paying attention to her at all times. It doesn't seem to matter whether that be you, Steve, or Eddie. As long as at least one of you is watching, touching, talking to, or pleasuring her— in the case of the guys— she is full of powdery-soft sweetness, bright eyes, and eager smiles. But if Chrissy feels that she's being overlooked, she'll make her displeasure known, usually by pouting or sulking until someone coaxes her back into contentment. Or, occasionally, she'll insert herself into the action to ensure she gets the attention she wants. Still, she never gets huffy or snappy, and she's otherwise so kind that it's easy to accept this quirk of hers. 

Plus, the way you're rearranging right now… it's pretty ideal.

You find yourself arranged upon two pillows, one under your head and one under your butt. You glance past the valley of your breasts and soft stomach to see Steve kneeling between your spread legs; you widen them as he nudges closer, your calf hooking behind Chrissy as she kisses him. Her fingers play in the hair on Steve's chest as he guides his cock to your entrance. You hear Chrissy suck in a quick breath as Steve's hand disappears from your view, presumably to finger her while he fucks you. 

It requires flexibility, deftness, and concentration, but Steve has already proven himself worthy of the task. He clearly takes pride in pleasing you both simultaneously, showing off his skills to you and Chrissy— and Eddie, to an extent, you suppose. You know Steve loves the way Chrissy praises him over his sexual prowess as much as he loves her talking dirty to him, and his resulting effort certainly benefits both of you.

Your eyes are drawn to pale thighs dusted with sparse hair as Eddie kneels beside your head, and they drag over the length of his thick cock as it bobs sideways over your face, skin slick and deeply, appealingly pink at the tip. As you feel one of Steve's hands grip your thigh and the warm press of his length against your entrance, your eyes flick to warm brown darkened to amber as Eddie stares down at you. This specific position is one you haven't tried yet, but you are nearly squirming with your desire to; your pussy is wet and throbbing, sensitive from Eddie's eager licking and the anticipation of Steve fucking you while you lavish Eddie's cock with your mouth.

You stick out your tongue, hips shifting as Eddie nudges closer to you. You reach up, fingers wrapping lightly around his base to keep him steady. And then, you lick a thick stripe up the underside of Eddie's cock as Steve presses inside you.

You moan into that first delicious stretch, chin tipping up, tongue wet and pink and supple as it drags across Eddie's length while Steve's long cock sinks deep into your pussy. You hear Steve groan as you envelop him, and Chrissy hums, moaning breathily as he starts to work you both. Steve begins to set an even rhythm— not slow, but not too fast or hard, just enough to jostle you slightly as you take Eddie into your mouth. He's hot as you lave him with your tongue, and you register a musky taste as Chrissy says cheekily, "Can you taste me on his cock?" 

"Mmm," you hum absently, eyes locked on Eddie's face framed by dark wild curls as those plush lips part in a slight groan; you relish his reaction as your sound vibrates against his sensitive head. You bob to take him deeper, sucking slightly harder as you watch him bite his lip. The angle is a little awkward, though it doesn't make you less enthusiastic as Eddie starts to move his hips with the rhythm of your head— gently, lightly, just enough for you to reward him by slipping the hand around his base downwards to cup his balls. You know he likes that, and you're pleased when his teeth release his lip so he can grin down at you.

Distantly, you hear Chrissy speak again, though this time, it's not directed at you. "You're quite the multitasker, Steve. I'm impressed. Stretching me open so well while you fuck her little cunt." As Steve hums in approval, you change the angle of your head, lightly kneading Eddie's balls as he thrusts lazily into your cheek. Fire smolders low at the feeling of Steve's cock in your pussy and Eddie's in your mouth. You moan, a slight, breathy sound, tongue playing against Eddie's length as you watch him reach for your face, dark eyes intent as his calloused thumb gently swipes at the corner of your mouth and chin to wipe away your spit for you. And you feel it again— that verdant, lush feeling that spread when he held your hand. As it blooms down to your belly, the moth wings flutter, beating a frenzy while Steve starts to fuck you faster, cock reaching deeper, hips pounding harder against your spread thighs.

You pull off Eddie then, fingers stroking over his length slick with your spit; you work him with your hand as you lick along his underside. And you really fucking love this— you love the way your body is shaking with the force of Steve's thrusts as you play with Eddie's cock, as you hear that smoky voice groan when you lick down to Eddie's balls, sucking one and then the other into your mouth. It's your fantasy come to life, and you whimper, pleasure flaring as you realize it, face flushing down your neck to your chest as your body rocks. You can hear Steve and Chrissy exchanging filthy words, but you register it only distantly as your breasts bounce with the force of Steve's pounding. You whimper again, muffled around Eddie's balls, the sound stuttering as Steve fucks you. 

"Shit." The sighed word is louder by proximity but said more quietly than Steve and Chrissy. You realize then that your eyes are closed, and they flutter open as you release Eddie's balls to lick up his cock again, moaning breathily until you realize he's staring intently at your bouncing breasts. 

You hadn't really been thinking about what your body looked like until you now register the intensity of Eddie's stare, and you feel a flash of insecurity. Your breasts aren't small and perky like Chrissy's; when you get pounded like this, they shake and jiggle, and so, to an extent, do your soft stomach, your thighs, and your ass. You haven't retracted your tongue, but your expression starts to crumple into hesitance until Eddie husks, "Fuck, sweetheart, you have no idea how gorgeous you look right now." He's muttering quietly, smoke voice rough with desire. 

Your belly flutters at the praise, at the fact that Eddie has chosen to speak so quietly. Because it means that he's only really interested in you hearing him. Not that it's a secret, or that he doesn't want the others to hear him, but that he only really cares that you receive his words. Pleasure twists, burning hotter as you lick up and down his length again before wrapping your lips firmly around his head. He exhales sharply, like a sigh of appreciation. "Christ." 

And as you feel the way Eddie's words affect you, always desirous for more of Eddie's reactions, too… caught in the pleasure of this moment taken straight from your deepest fantasies… noticing how Steve and Chrissy are still talking to one another, and thus distracted…

And with that tendril of green peeking through the earth at the bottom of you…

You decide to try something. You decide to tell Eddie the truth.

You pull off his head, replacing your mouth with your hand to keep stimulating him. And you murmur against his heated skin, voice soft and stuttering with the impact of Steve's hips. "I really like sucking your cock, Eddie."

As you see how his brown eyes widen and deepen, eyebrows jumping in surprised pleasure to hear you talking to him, you get the reaction you desire. "Yeah?" That smoke voice is nearly a purr, deep and sensual, sinking into the pit of your belly to smolder there. "You like it?"

"Mmm-hmm," you confirm, staring up at him as you lick his slit. You keep stroking him intently as you think about what you want to say next. And you feel a little shy, but Eddie's looking at you with such heat that you add, voice barely more than a whisper, "I want you to finish in my mouth."

Your eyes stay locked on Eddie's face, hips squirming as he murmurs back, "Of course, sweet girl. I'll give you all my cum."

"Mmm," you moan, pleasure flaring as you burn hotter, brighter at his promise and his praise. A little louder, you say, "I wanna swallow it." 

"Oh, fuck," Eddie groans, head tilting back as his hips jerk forward against your lips. And it's like as soon as you've voiced it, you need it— you need to taste the salty tang of his warm seed in your mouth, to see the flush of his cheeks, to hear the sound of his voice as you bring him to completion. 

You move your hand faster, lifting your head so you can bob on Eddie's length, taking him as deep as you can from this angle as Steve keeps fucking you evenly—

And then Steve's hips impact you hard, jolting your body as he groans deep in his throat. His rhythm stutters as he twitches inside you, pressing deep as he fills your pussy with his cum. But Eddie is fully in your mouth, and you didn't realize Steve was about to cum, so your teeth scrape against Eddie's sensitive head. 

You hear him hiss as he winces, and you pull off him immediately, brow crumpling in remorse. "I'm sorry!" 

The guilt fades as Eddie cups your head, calloused fingers gentle as his thumb rubs soothingly against your cheek. "No, it's okay," he says quietly. "I'm fine." You make a small sound as you lean into his touch. 

Steve is pulling out of you, but you're cupping your smaller hand over Eddie's, turning your face and kissing his palm softly. Steve is pressing Chrissy down to the bed, but Eddie is watching you, sighing as you take him back into your mouth. Steve is telling Chrissy how unbelievably sexy she is, but you're looking up at Eddie's plush lips as they part in pleasure, the pleasure you're giving him. Chrissy is moaning, high, feminine, and loud as she gushes around Steve's fingers, but Eddie's dark eyes don't leave yours, not once, not even for a second.

And as Eddie starts to twitch in your mouth— as his brow creases, dark eyes now desperate, hips rocking forward, pale quartz chest heaving under inked armor— you release him from your lips, gripping him tightly as you drag your fist over his thick length, over that spongy head flushed a deep pink, and you ask, "Will you cum for me, Eddie?"

Eddie moans, tight and high. "Fuck, yes—"

You open your mouth, sticking your tongue out to catch the first hot rope of Eddie's cum as his mouth falls open, and the sound he makes shoots straight down to zing into your pussy. Your thighs tighten, Steve's release squishing between your legs as you watch Eddie reach completion. You devour every second of his orgasm— the way his eyes scrunch shut, the pink flush of his cheeks and how it spreads down his neck; the way he grips the headboard, ruddy knuckles turning white as you continue to stroke him; the way he moans out his release, long and tight, hoarse and high, uncontrolled as he paints your tongue, your lips, your chin. You feel a thrill at the indulgence of it: cum in your pussy that leaks sticky between your thighs, cum on your face that drips warm and thick onto your breasts. 

Heat coils and pools low as Eddie's brown eyes blink open, hazy and sated. You lick him off your lips as he looks down at you. His eyes widen, and he seems almost awed as he sees the state you're in: hair mussed, lips flushed and swollen, a mess of his cum on your skin. But you don't feel the need to hide under the weight of his stare; instead, you take his head into your mouth, cleaning the salty tang from his slit. And when you do that, Eddie makes the most delicious sound. It's tiny, slight, but you hear it nonetheless: his lips press tight, his brow creases, and Eddie whimpers. 

He sounds pitiful, nearly pathetic, and as you register it, two things happen.

One, fluttering moth's wings burst instantly in your belly, beating up to your ribcage, trapped behind it as you release his tip with a gasp. 

And two, you see it again: that pink on Eddie's black and white, spreading as he holds your gaze, looking almost like he wants to glance away, but he can't. That blush isn't heat from his arousal; it's not sex flush. It doesn't look exactly like embarrassment, either. It's something else. Something that reminds you of the gentleness you sometimes see in his eyes.

Thin arms wrap around Eddie's shoulders, hugging him from the side as Chrissy happily nuzzles his cheek. Her strawberry-blonde waves are touseled, but they still look silky when she turns her head to glance down at you. "Oh, you already came? I wanted to watch." Chrissy sounds disappointed until her gaze dips lower. Her eyes brighten then, arms tightening around Eddie's shoulders as he glances at her. "Ooh, you really made a mess of her pretty tits, didn't you? You're so sexy, baby!" She smiles, and you watch Eddie crook a grin back as the mattress bounces on your other side.

Steve flops down next to you, sighing contentedly as he runs a hand through his damp bangs. "Damn, that was really fucking good—" He glances at you then, brows shooting up. "Oh, shit, babe, you're a mess."

There isn't any judgment in his voice, just surprise as his eyes dart over your chin and breasts; before you can respond, Eddie jumps in. "I can get her a towel," he offers quickly, and you glance up to see his hands on Chrissy's arms, pulling them from around his shoulders as she pouts. 

"Nah, man, it's fine. I got it." Steve's reply is easy and casual, and he flashes you a grin before he gets up. Though you'd all learned quickly that towels in bed were a must, the one you had prepared has been thoroughly saturated by the intensity of Chrissy's squirting orgasm.

The soft smacking of lips draws your eyes automatically, though they dart away from the sight of Eddie and Chrissy kissing as you watch the bathroom doorway instead, waiting for Steve to return as the cum begins to cool on your skin. 

He reemerges soon enough, hazel eyes fond as he brings you the towel. Your gaze drags over powerful shoulders, a solid torso, the thick brown hair on his chest almost furlike before it trails down his belly to end in a neat trim around his now-soft length. The mattress dips again with Steve's weight, and you're appreciative as he wipes you gently with the towel— first your lips and chin, then your breasts, and then between your legs. 

"Thank you," you say, smiling softly as Steve drops a kiss to your bent knee before propping himself up on an elbow beside you. You feel a shift behind you as Eddie and Chrissy leave the bed, presumably to go clean themselves up. 

You draw your fingers through Steve's bangs, smile growing as they flop back into his eyes again. "No problem, babe," he says warmly. 

But when Steve pecks you briefly on the lips, settling his head against his pillow with a contented sigh, you find your hand automatically reaching behind you, searching along the duvet. You're looking for the man who'd knelt before you, for those pale thighs dusted with sparse hair, forgetting for a moment that he's already gone.

-

It's been quite a while since you've stepped foot into the old cinema on Fourth and Main, but it seems nothing has changed in your absence. The carpet is still that dingy pattern from the mid-nineties, the air smells of age and synthetic butter, and they still have those oversized cardboard cut-outs displayed near the entrance. You beam as you see the ones depicting two giant blue people, pulling Steve eagerly along as he chuckles at you. Standing in front of the pair of giant blue people is a pair of regular-sized people in their casual best: a metalhead swathed all in black— sweatshirt, ripped jeans and all— and a former cheerleader adorned in soft pastels, complete with fuzzy slippers and a chic oversized sweater. You're all dressed a little warmer than the weather requires in anticipation of the frigid air conditioning the theater always seems to be pumping, regardless of the time of year. 

Your thick cardigan flops loosely against your thighs as you bound over to them, eyes darting from one face to the other: from Eddie's eager brown eyes and bright grin to Chrissy's baby blues and fond smile, bow lips only slightly pinched as you stop in front of them. Her displeasure has nothing to do with you and everything to do with the movie you're going to see; she doesn't share the same love of fantasy you and Eddie do. But Avatar: The Way of Water is the first big fantasy movie that's graced the big screen in what feels like forever. You'd been awash with childish wonder in the age of Harry Potter, Pirates of the Caribbean, and Lord of the Rings , and this release conjures an echo of that feeling. You're buzzing with that same youthful exuberance you'd felt seeing those films as a kid, and you see that same energy echoed in the frenetic bouncing of Eddie's knee, the edge to his manic grin.

"Hi!" You chirp, throwing your arms around Chrissy first, scrunching your shoulders as she squeezes you back.

"Hey!" She smiles wider at you, eyes extra blue with fondness as you release her to hug Eddie next. You can feel his excitement in the way he squeezes you tighter than usual, and your back bends with the force of his lean. You chuckle against his hood, and he only lets you go once you pat his back to ask for mercy. Steve joins you in greeting your friends as you ask if they've been waiting long.

"No, we basically just got here," Chrissy says with a light sigh. Her voice is wheedling as she throws out one last-ditch attempt: "Are we sure we don't wanna see Megan instead? It's playing at the same time; it would be so easy to switch since we haven't gotten the tickets yet…."

Eddie looks pained as he shifts on his feet, eyes locked on Chrissy's face, which is now puppy-dog soft in an effort to coax him. "Babe,” he says imploringly, “we’ve already talked about this, and we agreed…."

Chrissy pouts up at him, adding another chink in his resolve with her sweet voice. "It did better on Rotten Tomatoes, too." 

Eddie looks helplessly around at the rest of you, relinquishing the decision to you and Steve in his silence. Your shoulders fall; you knew Chrissy didn't want to see this movie, but you hadn't realized she was so vehemently opposed. And you know Steve isn't really interested in it either. He's basically in the same boat as Chrissy— just going along with it because he knows it's something you want to see.

Though your eagerness begins to edge into disappointment, you feel yourself already swaying with the invisible pressure of their preferences. You open your mouth to relent, but Steve answers first. "Yeah, but it still did well, and I've heard good things from people at the office," he says, relaxed and casual. "The first one was a huge hit. I think it's worth checking out."

At Steve's resistance, you see Chrissy resign herself. "Okay, fine," she says through a final, heavier sigh before looking up at her boyfriend. "Can we take a selfie with the blue people, at least?"

"Of course," Eddie says quickly. As they take their photo, you wrap your arm around Steve's, smiling against his sleeve as you feel him lean into the press of your cheek. You're grateful that he'd stuck up for your choice even though you know he'd probably rather see Megan too. You communicate it silently in the softness of your eyes as you look up into Steve's boyishly handsome face, and you feel a gentle flutter as he smiles back at you, full lips stretching in a crooked grin.

"Okay," Chrissy says, and her expensive perfume wafts over you as she draws closer. You release Steve as she asks, "Can you guys go get the tickets?"

"And the snacks?" you add, shooting a hopeful glance at Steve as Eddie flanks him. 

"'Course," your boyfriend replies, and together, you and Chrissy watch them lope away. You let her pull you toward a bench near the wall to wait. 

"Help me pick a filter!" You lean in as she holds her phone between you, opening up the Instagram editor. The picture is a low-angle selfie with Jake and Neytiri in the background; Chrissy is winking, and Eddie has his tongue stuck out in that characteristic way of his. A tiny fond smile tugs at your lips as you watch the shadows of his face transform, changing in depth and hue while Chrissy tests the different filters. "What about this one?" she asks, angling the phone to you at the same time that a text-message notification appears at the top of her screen. It's a message from her mom.

And you aren't trying to look, but your eyes are drawn to it automatically, scanning the text before Chrissy can dismiss it with a hasty swipe. "I've had it with you, Christine. You just do whatever the hell you want. You have some nerve using us and our money and still—

It's over in a second, but you're left reeling with the unintended intrusion. Your eyes dart to find Chrissy blinking rapidly, expression blank. Sympathy pangs high in your chest, aching in your throat. "Are you okay?" you ask quietly. You watch her chin twitch, and then Chrissy's smiling at you with those bow lips, revealing charming, slightly crooked teeth beyond.

"Of course! It's— I'm fine," she replies quickly, eyebrows tugged into an exaggeration of brightness, a mask she's wearing to convince you. But Chrissy's blue eyes are too expressive, and you know her too well now. She can't conceal the dimness there.

You consider asking her again or making an attempt at comforting her. But you abandon the thought quickly— you don't know the situation, and she's never spoken about her parents with you, so any attempts would come off clumsy at best. You nod, conjuring a small smile, but you don't feel right doing nothing, pretending it hadn't happened. So you reach out for her hand where it's fisted on her leggings. It's a silent show of support, a gentle overture that you hope helps.

After a moment, Chrissy loosens her fist, turning her hand and weaving her fingers through yours to squeeze you tightly. And you feel fondness bloom to mix with the sympathy when you look at her face again and see the relief, the gratefulness there. "I think that's a good choice," you tell her, nodding your chin toward the filter she's chosen.

"Me, too," Chrissy says warmly, pulling her fingers gently from yours so she can add a caption and post it to her story. She occupies the rest of the time showing you her Instagram photos, and you coo and fawn over them, knowing she's using it as a distraction from her earlier sadness. There are some of her and Eddie, some depicting herself in yoga poses, some with her and a group of girls you don't recognize in various locations— a winery, a farm in the fall, and a countless variety of bars. "This one is my favorite," she tells you happily, tapping on a photo of an aggressively-sleek electric guitar, shining red and slung around her body. Her hip is cocked with attitude, dainty fingers thrown high in a 'rock on' gesture, face scrunched with her tongue poking out. 

"It's super cute," you say, noting that others seem to agree; the post has more interaction than many of the others, though they all have dozens of likes, some approaching hundreds. 

The guys rejoin you then, and you eagerly accept the cup Steve passes to you. He has a large bucket of popcorn wedged under his other arm. "Cherry coke?" you confirm, grinning as he huffs familiarly. 

"Duh," Steve says playfully, and Eddie nudges him with his elbow.

"C'mon," Eddie says through his teeth, which are already clamped around a cherry-red Twizzler. "Chris's leaving us in the dust." You lean around Steve to see her leading the way into theater number three; she spins around when she notices you haven't followed, painted fingers working open her miniature bag of Skittles.

You trot after Steve as he follows Eddie, and Eddie follows Chrissy. You're soon plunged into dimness, surrounded by the rustling of other moviegoers hushed under the pre-movie reel depicting some actor interview. You realize then, as you gaze at Steve's back, that you want to voice your thankfulness for what he'd done for you. You draw close, fingers brushing against his wrist as his hand swings back; when he notices, he glances over his shoulder at you, hazel eyes warm as he wraps his hand around yours. 

"Thank you," you murmur, pausing at the end of the aisle to lift on your toes and kiss Steve's cheek. 

Steve seems pleased but confused. "For the snacks?" 

"No. Well, yes," you chuckle. "But no. For sticking up for the movie. I know you didn't really want to see it."

His face softens then, eyes alight with the glow of the movie screen. "Of course," he replies fondly, kissing your forehead. You smile big, shuffling eagerly after him as he sits next to Eddie. You flop into your own rickety seat, depositing your cherry coke into the arm holder as you wiggle, trying to find a comfortable position. The cushions are worn near threadbare, but you're too excited for what's coming to care.

Your excitement bursts out as you lean forward, looking across at your companions to tell them eagerly, "So I read this crazy thing about the first Avatar movie the other day. Apparently, James Cameron spent, like, millions and millions of dollars creating a soundtrack because he wanted it to sound like nothing anyone had ever heard before, with new time signatures and stuff. But then, because they were so successful at making it sound alien, Cameron decided it was too strange to include in the movie. So they scrapped the original soundtrack and made a more traditional one that they thought audiences would like better."

Steve nods slowly, like he doesn't entirely know what you're talking about but is impressed with your knowledge. "Shit," Eddie says, "that's—"

Chrissy leans forward. "That sounds super weird. I bet no one would've seen it if they kept it."

You shrug, replying lightly, "Yeah, I think that was the whole idea around changing it."

"That would've been cool, though." Eddie bites off the end of his Twizzler, chewing as he waves it in the air. "Like, here's this film that Cameron'd been waiting to make for years since the technology wasn't good enough to actually do it before 2009. So it's ground-breaking with its visual effects and also with it's fuckin' weird-ass soundtrack?" He grins. "Would've been a pretty ballsy move if they'd gone through with it."

"I guess." Chrissy tilts her head before pushing back, though her voice is without bite. "But when people go to the movies, they expect a certain thing. They want to actually enjoy their experience. So to do something totally unexpected…." Her eyes brighten as she thinks of an example. "Oh! It'd be like if you went to a Yung Gravy concert and this guy—" she motions to Eddie with her nose scrunched up, "came out. Huge letdown."

As Chrissy motioned to him, your eyes had darted to Eddie's face. So you see the split-second right before he smirks that it changes. It's minuscule, a minute twitching of his muscles, the briefest flash of something behind his eyes. And the theater may be dim, but you know what you saw.

Eddie chuckles dryly. "Yes, Chris, we're all fully aware you hate metal."

"Well, I'm just saying…" she defends, eyes darting around the group before landing on you. "You know what I mean, right, y/n? Not what I paid for!"

You know she's waiting for an answer, eyes locked expectantly on you. You swallow, only one split-second to decide how to respond: say what you really think or say what she wants to hear.

What you want to say is, No. I don't know what you mean, Chrissy. Can't you see you've hurt him? You thrum with your desire to push back, pressure building in your chest as your words beat against your breast, wanting to escape. But under the weight of Chrissy's bright blue gaze, those words stick in your throat, and you can't quite bring yourself to look into her face and argue so directly with her. Still, as your eyes dart to wild curls, the pale quartz of Eddie's blank face, and the dark ink of his eyes, neither can you bring yourself to agree with her.

So you don't say anything.

There's a long beat of uncomfortable silence before Steve interjects, joking to try to break the tension. "She can't relate— put her Spotify on random lately, and you'll hear T-Swift and Sleep Token one after the other." 

Chrissy wrinkles her nose. "Who?" 

Steve chuckles once, a little awkward. "Nevermind." 

Chrissy shrugs, unbothered as she pops a handful of Skittles into her mouth. 

The lights dim fully then, fading slowly into darkness as the first trailer begins. You feel the vague thrum of pressure behind your ribcage fade, the wrinkle eventually smoothing from between your brows as you watch it. You find yourself distracted, however, as you hear in the murmured, nearly one-sided conversation Eddie is having with Steve, how he's bemoaning that Lord of the Rings was the last good fantasy movie franchise.

"What about Harry Potter?" Steve and Eddie glance at you as you lean over Steve's lap, conscientious about keeping your voice down, so you don't disturb everyone around you. 

Eddie scoffs. "What about it? In no way does it compare to Lord of the Rings. They're not even in the same league." His voice is louder than yours, and you narrow your eyes, dropping your volume pointedly.

"Well, are you counting The Hobbit as part of the franchise? 'Cause those movies are total trash in comparison. I mean, I'll be the first to admit that the original trilogy is a masterpiece—"

"See?" Eddie interjects, triumph in the crook of his lips.

"But," you add, punctuating the word with a pointed finger, " The Hobbit trilogy totally falls short. Drags the whole ship down with it. It bombed so bad that I'd argue it's almost an equalizer."

Eddie sighs sharply, tugging on his dark curls as he leans further over Steve's lap toward you. You ignore how Steve is beginning to look disgruntled as you both crowd into his space; you're too invested in the argument to care. "I mean, look, the problem with The Hobbit is—"

"Dude." Steve's whisper is harsh with exasperation as he eyes Eddie. "I don't wanna be stuck in the middle of this the whole movie. Just switch seats with me." 

Steve and Eddie stare at each other for a second before Eddie shrugs, unfolding himself awkwardly so he and Steve can maneuver around each other. Your bucket seat shudders as Eddie falls into the chair beside yours, leaning intently over the armrest as if he'd never been interrupted. "The problem with those movies is, The Hobbit is a children's book. So not only is there less plot, there's also a lot more, like…" he waves his hands around as he speaks, "whimsy in it. And they kind of leaned into that whimsy, but they didn't go far enough. They were still trying to make it epic, so tonally, it was just a confused mess."

You nod eagerly as he speaks, eyes locked on bright brown. "No, I totally agree with you on that. They also never should've stretched it to three movies. Should've kept it to two at the most."

Eddie grins crookedly, rubbing his fingers together in front of his face as he leans back in his seat. "It's all about the money, darlin'. That's all it's ever about."

You huff a chuckle. "Yeah, really." 

You lapse into silence for a moment, but when you look at Eddie again, you're reminded of that brief flash of hurt you'd seen on his face earlier. He seems fine now, but it's needling at you: the insistent desire to check on him.

"Hey," you say quietly, and he glances at you curiously. "Um… are you okay?" His face goes blank, and you rush to explain, "I just mean, I thought that maybe… when Chrissy said—"

His brow crinkles immediately. "Uh, yeah," he replies, cutting you off, words whip-sharp— not harsh, not angry, but decisive. Dismissive. He chuckles once, looking perplexed as he glances away at the screen. "Why wouldn't I be fine?"

You blink at him, a little taken aback by his change in demeanor. "Okay," you say, voice small, nearly regretful to have said anything. 

Silence settles between you, and you realize that you haven't been paying attention to the last two trailers. You take a sip of cherry coke, sweet fizz bursting on your tongue as you turn your eyes to the screen, watching until you hear that smoky voice murmuring close by. 

"You know, I've got a tattoo of Sting." He's leaning casually back in the seat, twirling the end of his uneaten Twizzler-half as he watches the screen. "That's Frodo's elven blade," he adds when you remain silent, brown eyes flashing briefly toward you. They're gentle now, almost rueful, and you recognize the comment for what it is. Not quite an apology, but certainly an olive branch.

"I know what Sting is," you say, smiling as you draw his attention with your reply. "And I'm not surprised. You have, like, a bajillion tattoos."

Mischief suddenly fills Eddie's face. "Where do you think it is?"

You eye him, taking a cue from the sudden glint in his expression. "Probably on your ass," you say baldly.

Eddie barks a sudden laugh, harsh and loud, and the sound draws the irritated gazes of nearly everyone in your immediate vicinity. You shush him frantically, hand fisting in the soft material of his hoodie as you lean in. "Shut up!" You hiss, but there's no malice in it; laughter curls at your lips, begging to be released, and you see the mirth on Eddie's face as he ducks closer to you, dark curls tickling your cheek. 

His reply is a whisper tinged with suppressed chuckles, quieter than you've ever heard him to compensate for his outburst. "Don't you think you would've noticed by now if I had a tattoo on my ass?"

You snort, whispering wryly back, "I don't spend all my time staring at your ass, Eddie."

His eyes are wide and innocent. "Oh, you don't? That's too bad."

You know it's bait, but curiosity wins out. "Why's that?"

"'Cause that would've made us even since I spend a good deal of my time staring at your ass." 

Eddie smirks charmingly as he flusters you; you feel your cheeks heat, flush prickling insistently under his wolfish stare. You release his hoodie, leaning back as you resist the urge to squirm with the sudden flare of moth wings. He seems content to let you go, tipping up his chin, looking rather pleased with himself when you sneak a quick glance at him.

A slow, dawning comprehension comes upon you as your eyes run over his profile. You realize that Eddie's black— his sharpness, his wit, his wolfish smiles, the leather and chains and ink he cloaks himself in— are almost like a guard, an armor he wears to keep his gentle white from showing. Still, that gentleness can't help but peek through sometimes. Because you think, at his core, Eddie is a genuinely kind and caring man. You think there's a softness to him that he seems to want to keep hidden.

It makes you wonder why he feels he needs to do that.

Your ruminations are interrupted by the jaunty little 'silence your phones' clip that signals the movie is about to start. You snuggle down into your seat, eyes rapt on the screen as the opening scene begins.

The experience is precisely what you'd hoped for: visually stunning, delightfully nostalgic, an opportunity to re-experience that sense of childhood wonder that so often becomes lost in adulthood. And Eddie proves himself a delightful seat partner. You can see why Steve had eagerly switched places with him since you know most people would likely find Eddie's running commentary irritating, but his boyish excitement is so adorable that you don't mind. You glare at him playfully when he steals sips of your cherry coke, pretending to pout until you feel your cheek poked by the end of a Twizzler he offers in recompense.

"Damn," Eddie murmurs close, conscientiously quiet now that the movie has begun, and you resist a shiver as his warm breath puffs against your ear. "Those are some impressive dreads. Maybe I should get dreads."

You huff amusedly, eyebrow crooked skeptically as you glance at him. Your breath catches with how close his face is— close enough to count every long eyelash that frames those eyes, the most beautiful shade of brown you've ever seen. You gather yourself to reply, "No, Eddie. No dreadlocks."

His eyes dance, darting between yours as his plush pink lips pull into a crooked grin. "What," he whispers, "don't think I could pull it off?"

You swallow thickly, moth wings fluttering as he stares at you so intently from such a close distance. This certainly isn't the first time you've been this close to Eddie— you've kissed him countless times in your apartment. But this is different. You're in public, sitting in a crowded movie theater, so the setting is, objectively, less intimate than laying side-by-side on your king-sized bed. But maybe that's what makes it feel so intimate— that you aren't here to swing with him and Chrissy and Steve, to engage in daring acts of sexual debauchery. You're here to do something totally commonplace: watch a movie you'd been looking forward to seeing. One that you're now experiencing together with him.

"Nope," you whisper back, grinning so he knows you're teasing. Your eyes scan Eddie's disheveled curls, and impulsively, you tug on one as you add playfully, "Plus, I think the eighties mullet suits you."

When he doesn't reply, your eyes dart from the lock of hair in your grasp to his face, and you find him with his lips twisted against a broad grin, one cheek dimpled charmingly, brown eyes bright. Wings flutter again and the feeling is intense enough that you have to look away. 

Avatar: The Way of Water has a run time of one hundred and ninety-two minutes. That's just over three hours. And during the course of those three hours, as you see the wonder overtake Eddie's face as the light from the screen plays across his pale quartz skin, feeling that same sense of wonder inside yourself; as you sip your drink, passing the cup to him and accepting Twizzlers without a second thought; as Eddie smiles at you when your darting eyes catch, and you smile automatically back, something continues to grow at the very bottom of you. That tendril of green sprouts taller, straightening as it reaches for the light that shines in beautiful brown eyes. With each tiny brush of those callused fingers, leaves begin to bud, unfurling soft and fragile. Collecting that brightness, using it to feed your roots, to nourish you, so that you can grow strong. 

So that you can finally thrive.

Suddenly, you want to lift the armrest that divides you and press yourself against Eddie's side, to burrow into the plush softness of his thick hoodie. You want Eddie to wrap his arm around you, to hold you close, to envelop you in his warmth, in his scent, in the smoke of his voice. You want to stroke your fingers along the back of his hand, to feel the roughness there and the smooth metal of his rings. You want to bury your face in the crook of his neck, to shove your nose against the musk of his skin, to feel the tickle of his curls against your cheek. 

A poignant yearning fills you as you want, you want, you want—

"Want some popcorn?" 

There's a bucket half-filled with popcorn hovering over Eddie's lap, and your eyes dart to hazel and a swoop of artfully-disheveled bangs. Mutely, you shake your head as Eddie takes a handful, shoving it in his mouth as your boyfriend settles back into his seat. You watch dainty fingers dip into the bucket, the sway of Chrissy's strawberry-blonde hair as she leans forward, blue eyes locked on the screen as she absently presses popcorn past those bow lips.

A pang of annoyance curdles in your stomach; a thought blooms, sudden and violent.

You wish Steve and Chrissy weren't here. You wish it was just you and Eddie.

Almost as soon as it comes, that pang of annoyance leaves you; you balk at the thought immediately. You lift your head from Eddie's shoulder to glance again at Steve— Steve, your boyfriend of three years, who'd fought for you to see this movie even as he yawns widely now, eyes dull with boredom. What's wrong with you? How could you think that? The sticky tar of sinking guilt weighs on you, and you settle back into your seat, retreating from Eddie's warmth. 

He glances at you briefly, but you avoid his gaze, eyes locked instead on the screen. But you aren't really absorbing anything, caught up in the sudden realization that, in the course of these two months of group play, double dates, and late-night texting, something has finally caught up with you. 

You have a crush on Eddie. 

The realization twists you up in its grip, unable to be ignored now that you've acknowledged it. And when the theater lights finally rise, conflict rages within you, tumbling with the thick guilt and the flutters you can't help but feel when Eddie's hand brushes incidentally against the small of your back as you leave the theater.

You school your face into neutrality as you wrap your arm around Steve's, clinging to him tightly as soon as he's discarded the empty bucket of popcorn. You paste on a smile as you say goodbye to Chrissy, guilt panging at the soft kindness in her eyes as she acknowledges, "That was actually better than I thought it would be! I'm glad we went."

"Yeah, I liked it," Eddie says, plush lips crooked with a grin. 

"Good," Chrissy says, warm and fond as she smiles up into his face.

You hug her tight, and though you hold on for a beat too long, she just sighs against you contentedly, none the wiser that the strength of your embrace is due to that oozing sense of guilt inside. You're both dreading and longing for Eddie's goodbye hug as you lightly wrap your arms around his shoulders. Despite yourself, you relish the contact as his arms close around you, warm hands rubbing briskly along your back, and your neutral expression crumples as you feel his lips press briefly against the side of your hair. You barely manage to school your face again before pulling away, flashing a quick smile as you decisively take your boyfriend's hand.

And as you leave the theater with Steve, you glance back only once at the man dressed all in black, watching him lope away until the urge to retreat from the sight overtakes you.

The sticky tar of guilt spreads within. It shades your growth, oozing down into the earth at the bottom of you, trying its best to wither your roots.

-

The thing about the human psyche is that it'll do whatever it can to protect and preserve its sense of self. Humans cannot live forever with guilt; it must be resolved somehow. And, in your case, your guilt will do one of two things.

It may smother that fledgling growth inside you. In that case, your feelings for Eddie will weaken until they finally wilt away. Or you will tell Steve that you no longer want to swing with Eddie and Chrissy, thus nipping the problem directly in the bud.

Yet there’s still the other possibility: that your growth may survive, too sturdy to be smothered by that oozing tar. In that case, you will reason that Steve is happy— happier than you've seen him since he'd gotten that promotion at work over a year ago. You will reason that you've both gained two close friends, good friends who are good people, whose company enriches your lives. You will reason that you are mature enough to separate feelings and lust, to compartmentalize so that all of you can continue enjoying your sexual encounters together— the same way you'd controlled those feelings of jealousy. And you will not reason this, but somewhere, deep down, you will know it: that being close to Eddie feels too good for you to stop. 

Your leaves are delicate, and that green stem has just uncurled. But your roots are deep, long-nourished by light and ink-black charcoal. 

It takes startlingly little time for the tar of your guilt to dry and crumble to dust.

-

It's another Friday night, not long after your trip to the movies. You're crowded around the tiny bar table, head swimming from the celebratory shots you'd taken with the other girls— two of Chrissy's friends, who'd come with you all for drinks after the charity fundraiser Chrissy had helped organize for the yoga studio she teaches at. One of them is telling a story, something about the results of the rose ceremony from this week's Bachelor episode. You're trying to listen, but your eyes can't stop flicking to black and white. You burn for the moment you will finally leave this place, for when four pairs of feet will shuffle through your front door, kicking off shoes and tugging off clothes on the way to the bedroom.

You've never seen Eddie dressed like this before, and you must admit, it's doing something to you.

He's still wearing those tight black jeans, the wallet chain, and the dark boots he's so partial to, but his shirt is uncharacteristically formal. It's a white button down, worn untucked, sleeves rolled up to his elbows, two buttons now popped at the collar to reveal a peek of that dark body armor across his chest. The ink snakes down his forearms, tendons stark as they run below the leather bracelet strapped around his wrist. Your gaze trails across ruddy knuckles, chunky silver rings, and those limber fingers that run along the edge of his whiskey glass, silently reminding you just what he can do with them.

And then there's his hair.

You've seen Eddie's curls frizzy with rain, damp with sweat, loose around his shoulders, gathered into a low bun at the nape of his neck. But you've never seen him with a ponytail— hair scraped back along his skull, curls a thick cascade, short pieces dusting his sharp jaw, the silver of his earrings winking at you in the light. He looks utterly delectable.

Fuck, you want to devour him.

It's such sweet relief when you finally agree to call it a night and burst from the bar's front doors. This early May evening may be mild, but it's still enough to cool your burning cheeks as you stumble to your Uber, crammed into the back seat with Chrissy and Eddie as Steve takes shotgun. Giggles abound— from you and Chrissy, not so much Eddie— during the short trip back home, warm and resonant like the alcohol crawling through your veins. 

You suppose you've had more shots than you'd realized.

Car turns to elevator turns to hallway, and then you're home, staggering through the threshold as you shed your heels, practically vibrating with anticipation as the others join you. 

And then there's the bed, with its soft duvet and fluffy pillows begging you to sink into them. You're dragging your dress over your head as the mattress dips and more bodies join yours, and you emerge from the fabric to see Chrissy in her black bra and thong, Steve dressed down to his furry chest and tight blue jeans, and Eddie in his loose green boxers, limber fingers working the buttons of that white shirt open. 

You shuffle closer, burning anticipation settling to a comfortable simmer now that you're all finally alone together. You smile fondly as you wrap one arm around Chrissy's back, leaning in as her dainty fingers find your waist. Her mouth is sharp with alcohol as you open your lips, pink tongues darting teasingly, equally interested in tasting one another as you are in putting on an enticing show for your men. You smile into the kiss as you hear their groans, and Chrissy's hands trail tantalizingly over your waist, cupping your breasts over your bra. She pushes them together, pulling her mouth from yours so you can press your cheeks close, gazing heavy-lidded over at your men. 

They're both down to underwear, lean pale quartz beside tanned solidity, lounging comfortably back against your pillows as they watch you. Eddie's arm is slung casually around Steve's shoulders, hair freed from the ponytail now as Steve's temple leans against his, one leg bent, the other hanging off the bed. You and Chrissy continue to gaze at them, cheeks nuzzling, her hands kneading your breasts until your boyfriends glance at each other, knowing what you want.

You suck on your bottom lip as you watch Eddie and Steve kiss, muffling a moan in your throat as their mouths open wide, tongues dipping inside, strong jaws working as their faces press close. They know you and Chrissy love watching them kiss, and they oblige you easily now, reaping the benefits of how worked up you both get from the sight. Chrissy's hand leaves one of your breasts to turn your chin, kissing you again for a little while as you listen to the soft smacking of Eddie and Steve's lips. You're still hazy with alcohol, drunk on wine, tequila, and the low rumble of masculine moans that shoots straight down to throb in your pussy. Your desire quickly grows insistent, burning low in your belly; as you squirm with it, thighs tightening to try to bring relief, Chrissy nips your lower lip cheekily before letting you go. 

You turn intent eyes to the men before you, to the columns of their necks that seem to beg for your mouth to nip and suck and mark them up with pretty bruises. You have two choices. You could choose the tanned one, nape dusted by the touseled brown waves of Steve's hair, solid and powerful. He's right in front of you; all you'd need to do is shift forward on your knees, and you'd reach him. Or, you could choose the pale neck, framed by Eddie's long dark curls, angular and corded. He's farther away; you'd need to cross in front of Chrissy to reach him.

The choice is simple.

Eyes locked on pale quartz, you clamber sloppily past Chrissy's folded legs and drape yourself across Eddie's chest to reach his neck. The first contact of your lips against that warm column has you sighing in relief, trailing open-mouthed kisses up to that spot just beneath his ear. You can feel Eddie's jaw working as he keeps kissing Steve while you suck on his throat, and when you nip him playfully, you relish the moan that rumbles low in his throat, vibrating against your lips. Insistently, you work him until he finally breaks away from your boyfriend; as soon as his mouth is free, you're swooping in, capturing kiss-swollen lips, swallowing his moan as he opens for you to dip inside. 

Eddie always tastes a little spicy, no matter what else has been in his mouth— alcohol, Twizzlers, Steve's tongue. It's this tantalizing flavor that you now associate with Eddie, and you search for it with your own tongue, kissing him deeply until he's wrapping his arms around you. More uninhibited than usual, thanks to those tequila shots, you feel a flash of mischievousness, acting on the impulse before you can think better of it; you tip to the left, dragging Eddie down flat onto the bed with you. You feel him chuckle into your mouth, and your lips curl in a smile, legs tangling with his as soon as you're both sideways, pressing close to the heat of his skin.

Eddie leans eagerly into your kiss, one arm trapped underneath you, the other trailing lightly over your back. You reach behind you to snatch him by the wrist, nearly straining a muscle in your haste to unwrap his arm from around you; boldly, you drag his hand down, pressing his fingers against your pussy over your panties. 

He breaks the kiss then, plush pink lips crooked with a sensual grin as he murmurs low, "Eager tonight, are we?"

"Mm—" you whimper at the heat in his smoky voice, the light flush that already stains his cheeks. You lean toward his ear, and his lips brush your sensitive neck as you whisper your drunken admission. "You looked sexy in that shirt. With your hair tied up."

Eddie's breath puffs against your throat, and you tip your chin, leaning into the warmth of his lips as he murmurs, "Don't think I didn't see you watchin' me all night, sweet girl."

You can hear the smirk in his voice, and you giggle, biting your lip as his mouth presses to your neck, kissing softly, teasing you with the tip of his tongue. "Mm," you whimper again, wedging your hand beneath the waistband of his loose boxers. Your fingers brush the dense hair there, caressing it lightly as Eddie's hand dips into your panties. As one of his fingers presses between your folds to seek your clit, you grasp him, pulling until he pops from the fabric, head brushing red-hot against your abdomen. You stroke him once, then again as his finger teasingly circles your clit, catching the cinders in your belly aflame.

You press your hips into his touch, seeking more, but Eddie's finger retreats, brown eyes dancing with his tease as he goes back to touching you lightly. Well, two can play at that game. You nudge your nose against Eddie's, fingertips trailing to his tip, smiling slowly as you draw one fingernail feather-light across his slit.

His reaction is immediate— Eddie groans, his chest rumbling against yours as he bucks into your touch. You gasp as his finger dips abruptly lower, firm and decisive, hooking into your entrance without warning. It's a teaser for later, a little appetizer compared to the delicious stretch of Eddie's thick cock, but you hum nonetheless, pleased to be touched by him. 

Eddie moves his finger, pressing as deeply as possible from this angle. "You know you make me crazy when you do that," he murmurs quietly against your lips. 

"That's kinda the point," you tease, voice breathy as he continues to finger you. 

Eddie's manic smile lights his brown eyes from the inside. "Mmm," he hums approvingly before kissing you hard, tongue stroking yours as you moan into his mouth. You work each other for a while until you feel the bed shift beside you, considerable movements that draw your attention. You peer over Eddie to see that Chrissy and Steve are rearranging themselves: Steve's now lying flat, hazel eyes wide and eager as Chrissy crawls down his body. His hands find her hips as she ducks her head, taking him into her mouth as her pussy descends on his lips. 

Eddie glances over his shoulder briefly, pale neck stretching and inviting your lips. You nose beyond the curtain of his hair, pressing a soft kiss to his throat. When his chin nudges gently against your brow, and his hand finds your cheek, you sigh, leaning into his touch as he draws back to look at you.

"Hey," he murmurs, tucking your hair behind your ear, "would you wanna try being on top? Would you like that?"

You blink, fighting your instinctual answer: no, you would not like that. It's a lot of work to squat and move that way for very long; your legs always start burning almost immediately, it seems. Plus, you feel very exposed on top, like your partner can see every jiggle. Your gaze darts between Eddie's calm brown eyes; you're torn between the desire to reject the idea outright and your slowly-burgeoning openness. 

Eddie seems to sense your hesitation as his face, which was already soft, softens even further before he presses a sweet kiss to your lips. His thumb rubs against your jaw, soothing you. "You don't have to say yes," he says, low and reassuring. "But when you're on top, you can go as fast or slow as you want. You can grind down on me. You'll be in control; it'll make it feel good for you."

You'd never thought about it that way before. Still, you hesitate, admitting, "I don't know if I can squat for that long."

Eddie's eyebrows crinkle, and you aren't sure if it's in confusion or sympathy. "You don't have to squat, sweetheart," he whispers. "You can just sit on me." 

You blink again, cheeks pinking. "Oh." It's a little embarrassing that you'd never thought of that, but Eddie's face is free of judgment as he waits patiently for your answer. And you suppose, with that clarified, that there's no real drawback if Eddie's to be believed. As fast or slow as you want, riding Eddie's thick cock… you feel a tingle as you think about it, pussy pulsing around his finger that's still inside you. You watch him lick his bottom lip as he feels it, and your excitement increases.

You're already near to accepting when Eddie adds, finger stroking you gently inside, "And I'll let you know when I'm about to cum so you can pull off me."

You imagine Eddie flushed beneath you, husky voice tight as he stares into your eyes and tells you, 'I'm gonna cum, sweetheart—'

A thrill races through you, and you can't suppress your whimper as those moth wings flutter wildly at the thought. Eddie's arm underneath you tightens, lips finding yours before you can answer. You moan into his eager mouth, and Eddie kisses you breathless until you pull away to gasp, "Yeah— yes. I wanna be on top."

His eyes brighten, and he kisses you one last time before dragging your panties from your hips. You work his boxers down, wiggling to assist him as you both chuckle, your mutual hastiness more of a hindrance than anything. Your bra follows, and soon enough, you're both bare; Eddie lays down flat on your bed, guiding you to sling a leg over his narrow hips.

You register the wet sounds beside you, glancing briefly to see Chrissy's head bobbing between Steve's legs and Steve's hands squeezing her ass as he eats her out. But your gaze quickly returns to the man beneath you: dark curls splayed against your duvet, eyes warmed to deep amber, pupils blown wide as you reach behind you, fingers searching blindly for his cock. You hold it up straight, squirming to find the right angle, and you watch Eddie swallow thickly once his head notches between your supple folds. His hands settle on your hips, raspy and warm as you take a deep breath.

And then you begin to lower down onto him.

Over the many weeks, you've grown used to the tight press of Eddie's cock, shorter but thicker than Steve's. Still, this angle renders that delicious slide even more intense, and you clamp your lips against a desperate whimper as you feel him stretch you open. His thumbs brush light circles against your lower belly to encourage you as you sink onto him. "Just go slow, sweetheart." Eddie's voice is hoarse but soft with concern as you engulf him, and you sigh, wings fluttering as you obey; you pause until the pinch fades. And then you sink down, and down, and down until you're flush with the dark snatch of curls at the base of his cock, which press deliciously against your swollen clit.

Eddie's inked chest rises and falls, head tipping back as you take him to the hilt. "Just move when you're ready," he says.

But Eddie doesn't know you're already ready.

You move your hips experimentally, breath catching as his thick length shifts inside you. His hands encourage your movements, kneading your hips as you test out what you like— rocking back and forth, making small circles, lifting up slightly to fall back onto him. Eddie provides gentle guidance until you discover what works best: a quick shifting of your hips, angled to press against your front wall, with just a bit of lift to feel the slide of his hot thickness within you. Your movements grow bolder, more confident— longer, faster motions that pique your pleasure. And you hear that low rumbling moan again as Eddie's plush lips part, dark eyes like liquid heat as he watches you. "That's it, pretty girl," he murmurs, and his smoky praise coils tight in your belly, stoking both your desire and those fluttering wings. 

Normally, being pinned with such an intent stare while you're on top— unable to keep your breasts from bouncing, nowhere to hide how your stomach is soft and your thighs are bigger than your partner's— would overwhelm you with self-consciousness. But Eddie's looking up at you with such desire that, in this moment, you feel as pretty as he says you are. 

Eddie's next comment is considerably less smooth. "Christ, your tits are just—" Eddie exhales sharply as if in disbelief, and his lips tilt in a goofy grin.

You quirk a brow, prompting him dryly. "Just what?" 

"Just, like… shit, I dunno. I just wanna bury my face in 'em." Eddie drags his hands up your body to cup your breasts, squeezing lightly before squishing them together. 

He watches how they move in his grip with such awestruck delight that you can't help but laugh, hips slowing as you're overcome with your amusement when he wobbles them playfully. "You laughin' at me, y/n?" Eddie huffs, though his eyes glint with mirth.

"No." You blink at him innocently, but you can't help yourself. A tiny smirk spreads as you say, more sensually, "I'm fucking you."

Eddie's eyes go wide, darkening immediately. "Hmm," he hums, hoarse and low with approval. He grins wolfishly, murmuring, "Yeah, you fuckin' are."

Your pussy pulses as you inhale his words, letting them fill you, rich and heady. Your hips move faster on Eddie's thick length, and you bite your lip when his thumbs brush over your nipples, flicking lightly, sparking pleasure that flares into flame inside you. You'd already realized that Eddie is vocal in bed— well, he's vocal all the time, really. But not only is he often humming, and moaning, and groaning out his pleasure; he also enjoys talking to you, watching the way his words affect you, how they build your pleasure. And you're learning that your words can do the same for him— that it's not just your body that can elicit the reactions you desire in Eddie.

And you want that now— to talk to Eddie the way he talks to you, to bring him pleasure through the silky caress of your voice. You glance to your right as you rock on Eddie's lap, feeling a little hesitant with Steve and Chrissy right next to you, especially Chrissy, who always seems to know exactly what she wants to say. But they're moaning into one another's skin, mouths occupied, bodies rocking in pleasure, eyes closed as they lavish one another. They seem adequately distracted— like they're too caught up in their own activity to notice what you're saying. And as you look down at Eddie again, your desire to increase his pleasure allows you to push past your hesitance.

You swallow, chewing on your lip as you consider what to say. When you finally decide, your voice is a little timid, but you're proud it doesn't shake. "Am I making you feel good?"

Eddie's husky groan is instant. "Yeah, sweet girl. You feel so good." 

You whimper as his response coils your pleasure tighter, making you burn hotter. You watch his head tip back to reveal the pale cords of his neck, plush lips parted, the rise of his chest deepening as he hears your sound; he drags his hands back down your body, clutching at your hips, hot fingers pressing into your flesh. Yes. You sigh, brow creased pleadingly as you stare down at Eddie, needing more of his reactions.

You're a little less timid now. "Mmm. You like being inside me?"

Eddie's fingers tighten even further; his voice is suddenly tight too. "Shit, yeah, I fuckin' like it." 

As he clutches you, you feel his legs shift beneath you, and your eyes widen in alarm, perch suddenly unsteady. But then his hips are thrusting, matching your rhythm, the quick drag—slide—lift—fall that now presses his cock deliciously harder into your pussy. You whimper again; pleasure flares as you glance behind you to see that Eddie has planted his feet so he can fuck up into you. He holds you securely, and you relax into his support, letting the flames build as you move together.

Your breath comes quick, pleasure twisting with the anticipation of what you will tell him next. Your voice is silky as your words flow from your lips. "I'm so wet. You make me so wet." 

Eddie groans, deep and low in his chest at your admission. And it's true— you can feel your slickness increasing, his cock gliding more easily as you fall heavily down onto him, clit dragging against his coarse dark curls. You're growing hot, muscles beginning to tighten with fatigue, but you barely notice— you just want to keep chasing Eddie's reactions and the feeling that's just starting to tingle low in your belly.

Your voice almost doesn't sound like you— it's breathy, airy as you caress him with more of your silk. "I wanna be a good girl for you." 

"Fuck—" Eddie grunts, words tumbling from his lips like they're racing to reach you as quickly as they can. "You're so good for me, sweetheart. Shit, that's it, you're taking me so well."

You're both moving faster now; Eddie's hips are slapping against your ass, and your breasts are bouncing, but you aren't thinking about that at all. All you're thinking about is how the press of his thick cock increases that tingle and brightens the flame within you. Genuinely, without trying, you say, "Feels so good, don't stop—"

Eddie's hands shift on your hips, grabbing tighter as he fucks up into you a little harder; you moan, chest heaving with deep breaths. And as that tingling grows more insistent, you want something to hold onto, to anchor you. So you clutch at Eddie's hands, wedging your thumbs underneath his palms, holding on tight to him. Eddie moans as he looks up at you, face flushed, bangs sweat-damp and beautifully soft against his forehead. You whimper, skin heating, tingling pleasure swelling in your belly, building gradually toward that familiar precipice you've only ever reached alone. And if Eddie would just keep moving like this, looking like this, doing exactly this, for just a little longer…

There's no affectation in your voice now— you're just raw, just genuinely needy for him. 

"Please," you beg, "please, don't stop, Eddie—"

"Oh shit, fuck—!"

And that's the only warning you get before Eddie starts to cum.

You gasp as you watch his brow pinch; his mouth falls open as the cords of his neck stretch, and his hips press up into you tightly, no longer moving. And as you feel Eddie's dick twitch violently inside you, you burst with wings that beat up through your belly to your chest, fluttering so wildly you're left reeling. 

You don't make any attempt to move off of him. You can't. You're frozen, rapt, attention honed to the feeling of Eddie's hips collapsing to the bed underneath you, to the way his muscles quiver with his release, to the noises he makes as you instinctively grind down on him, to the warm flood of the seed he fills you with. Eddie whimpers and moans, tight and high, and you don't realize it, but you're whimpering, too— crying out your yearning in a sound that approaches harmony.

The moment is just as breathtaking, just as captivating as you'd imagined it would be.

 When the twitching of Eddie's cock finally stills inside you, you're both left silent, breathing heavily, hands still nearly intertwined against your hips as you stare at one another wide-eyed. Your sexual pleasure has begun to fade, but it doesn't matter right now. All that matters is how Eddie is looking at you, how you're looking back at him. Hesitant. Tentative. 

Pink on black and white. Green from the bottom of you.

"Dude—!" The harshness, especially after the almost spell-like silence that had settled between you and Eddie, makes you jerk with surprise, adrenaline spiking in your chest. Your stomach swoops as you register Steve's face— nostrils flared, brow snarled low over thunderous hazel eyes locked on his friend. "What the actual fuck?"

Your eyes dart between them, wincing as Eddie's face blanches and his eyes go so wide as they meet your boyfriend’s gaze. "I—I'm sorry," he stammers, wrenching his hands from under yours as if he's been burned. "Fuck, I'm—" The pale of his face slowly fills with bright, furious red. "Shit—"  

Eddie drags his palms harshly over his face, shoulders scrunching toward his ears. "I'm so embarrassed," he muffles into his hands, leaving them there as if in a futile desire to hide. Your heart is hammering, panging with compassion for Eddie's distress just as much as it's thundering with the oppressive tension of this moment. Steve is so angry— angrier than you've seen him in a long time. Maybe ever. Because there were only two rules— two rules that you'd all sworn never to break. 

And Eddie has, very flagrantly, broken one. 

You look at Steve, wide eyes pleading, voice soft. "It's okay, Steve," you say, trying to diffuse the tension. "He didn't mean to. It was just an accident." 

Steve glances at you but doesn't reply, lip twitching as his gaze quickly flicks back to his friend. 

Eddie finally pulls his hands from his face. His bangs are mussed, brown eyes heavy with remorse as they dart almost reluctantly to Steve. Voice hoarse, cracked. Sincere. "I'm so sorry—"

"Yeah, you said that," Steve snaps, and your insides twist into knots at the uncharacteristic edge in his typically-smooth voice, the tension in his brow, the hardness of his handsome face. 

After a moment, Steve exhales harshly, both hands carding roughly through his hair; you can tell he's struggling with himself, fighting to keep under control. And as you're washed with the radiating force of his ire, feeling helpless to ease the situation, your chin begins to tremble; you avert your eyes as they sting with the sudden prick of tears. 

You know it's not your fault, not really. But you can't help but think that if you'd just gotten off when you felt Eddie start to cum, just moved, just done something— all of this could've been avoided.

The mattress dips beside you, and a soft arm wraps around your back. "Don't be mad, Steve," a powdery-soft voice says, calm and mild. A tender hand runs over your hair, soothing the sting of your tears before they can fall.

Steve sighs, scrubbing his hands over his face as Eddie had. He looks at you then, expression no longer hard, staring silently for a moment before he speaks. "It's fine," he says, voice utterly devoid of feeling. "Just go get cleaned up."

Not wanting to linger for even one more second, you hastily pull off Eddie's still-hard length, and Chrissy releases you as you clamber off the bed. You bite your lip as you retreat into the bathroom, feeling Eddie's cum trickle down your leg, still warm.

The closed door buffers you from the coldness of your bedroom, allowing you space to process what just happened— Steve's fury, Eddie's embarrassment, and most of all, the feeling that had bloomed within you when Eddie filled you with his release. You retrieve a towel, carefully wiping yourself, eyes avoiding the sticky mess that smears the cloth. When you examine your feelings, you're left feeling torn. Because you're acutely aware that Steve's upset, and his distress upsets you. But you're also acutely aware that the way you'd felt when Eddie came inside you was unmistakable.

You'd loved it. You'd loved every single second of it.

You clean yourself thoroughly, wavering for a while, hesitant to emerge and find that the situation has devolved in your absence. It's been quiet— no yelling, which is a good sign, but you can't be sure. Still, eventually, you can't delay it anymore, so you crack the door, chewing on your bottom lip as you emerge.

Steve is alone, sitting on the end of your bed, still naked. His head is bowed, but he glances up when he hears the bathroom door creak open. Tension releases when you see Steve's hazel eyes are now clear as he stands to meet you halfway. When he enfolds you in a soft embrace, you lean into him, brow pinching.

"I'm sorry," you whisper.

"No," Steve says firmly, arms tightening, holding you securely. "I'm sorry, y/n. You didn't do anything wrong. I know it was an accident. It happens." You release a shaky breath as his broad palm finds the back of your head, stroking slowly as he murmurs against your forehead. "I'm not mad at you," he says quietly, and the reassurance brings sweet relief.

Still, you have to ask; your voice is small when you do. "Are you mad at Eddie?"

Steve's answer comes slower this time. "No," he says eventually, almost begrudging, yet still honest.

You release the rest of your breath, hugging him tighter. "I love you," you say, muffled to the fur of his chest. 

You feel Steve's cheek against the top of your head. His voice isn't muffled, but it's quieter than yours. "Love you, too."

–

Your phone always buzzes past midnight, usually closer to one most days. But tonight, when it does, it's only half past eleven.

You've just come out of the shower, skin scrubbed free of sweat and cum, steam hanging heavy as you comb the tangles from your hair. The bzz-bzz against the bathroom counter immediately draws your eye, and your heart thumps at the name on your screen. There's no message text— just a tiny colored box that loops through a two-second animation.

You pull the towel tighter around your damp body and swipe the message open.

It's a gif, which is already entirely out of the norm for Eddie. But what makes you stare, face contorting slowly in a combination of deep incredulity and begrudging amusement, is that the gif depicts one of your favorite artists in her early years: Taylor Swift, donning black glasses as she holds her hand-drawn sign up to the windowpane with a little lopsided pout. The sign says 'Sorry' with a frowny face.

As Taylor pouts at you again and again, you bite back a hysterical giggle. It's the most utterly absurd 'apologies for cumming inside you when I wasn't allowed to' message that you could imagine— not that you have any experience on the matter. 

And, honestly? It's kind of perfect.

Your lips pull into a broad, eye-crinkling grin as you tap-tap-tap your message back. 'Here is your penance. You must listen to this in its entirety and render your verdict,' you write, sending the link for Bejeweled— the most anti-Eddie song you can think of from Taylor's newest album.

You go back to untangling your hair after you send it, already formulating your reply as you anticipate hearing back from him almost instantly, figuring he won't actually listen to it. But you have time to moisturize your face and arms before you hear your phone buzz again.

You swipe hastily with a knuckle, too impatient to wipe off your hands. Your eyes scan the message, and you huff, shaking your head as you read it. 'Catchy as fuck. I like the part where she says 'diamonds in my eyes' real slow on the offbeat.' And he's given it five diamond emojis out of five.

You're torn between amusement and sympathy at the over-generosity of his rating. You wipe off your fingers so you can reply. 'I know in truth that song burned your poor bard ears. But I appreciate your earnest appeal for my sympathy.'

You keep your phone in your hands, watching the dots linger on the screen for a long time before it finally comes through. 'You got me. I really am sorry, y/n. Hope Steve isn't mad at you.'

'He's not,' you assure Eddie. 'I asked him and he said he's not mad at you either. He knows it was an accident.'

'Thanks.' There's a pause, and then, 'Hope you're not mad at me, either.' Moth wings flutter, and you bite your thumbnail as you stare at the message for a moment before replying. 

'It's really okay.' You pause before you hit send, twisting your lips against a smile as you add, 'Kind of flattering, actually.'

Eddie's response makes you giggle. 'Quit teasing me. You're gonna make me blush.' He's made it too easy; you can't resist.

'You mean again?' you ask, adding a winky face.

An 'ugh' follows— all caps, punctuated with a period. You beam with delight, typing out your laughter before conceding. 'Sorry, couldn't resist. Okay, going to bed now. Night!'

You set down the phone to brush your teeth, glancing as it buzzes one final time. But you look back, eyes lingering once you register Eddie's final message. 'Sleep well, sweet girl.' You can nearly hear him say it; can nearly feel the rasp of his hand on your cheek as his smoke whispers against your skin. 

And as you snuggle down into your bed that night, your mind conjures the ghost of curls that brush your cheek, kissing you softly as you peacefully succumb to sleep.

You took my breath away

So now I can't suck in my stomach 

around you anymore

Touch Tank — Quinnie

The dingy apartment hallway has never looked so luminous in the late afternoon sun as you return home from your afternoon of shopping. You're swinging your little striped bag, its treasures concealed beneath pink tissue; the fingers of your other hand are closed around the lid of a smoothie, mouth currently too occupied by a brilliant smile to keep sipping fruity goodness right now. 

You can't wait to show off your recent purchase to your boyfriend.

Inside, Steve is seated at the kitchen table, fingers tap-tap-tapping on the keys of his laptop, old coffee cooled beside him. You drape your arms around his shoulders from behind, peering at the mind-numbing spreadsheet with its rows of number-filled rectangles. You wrinkle your nose at it, tightening your arms; your bag crinkles against his chest, and your smoothie drags condensation across his shirt with the force of your hug.

Steve huffs amusedly through his nose, gently taking the plastic cup from your hand and placing it beside his mug before affectionately clasping your forearms. "I take it your girls' trip was a success?" 

"Yes," you say, eyes bright, grinning cheek pressed to his. "We each got something new for Friday night."

 "Oh?" Steve's thumbs rub teasing circles against your skin. "And do I have to wait until Friday to see your 'something new?'"

"Mmm…" You hum thoughtfully, playful as you wiggle your hips. "I suppose I could be persuaded to offer a sneak peek."

Apparently, that's all Steve needs to hear. The way he closes the laptop so unceremoniously makes you laugh, arms releasing him so he can eagerly pull you to the bedroom.

The four of you have been playing together for a few weeks now, and it's been good. Quite good, actually. You've found yourself growing more comfortable with both Eddie and Chrissy with each successive encounter, sexual and otherwise. You don't know whether all couples who swing also go on double dates to restaurants or solve escape rooms together, but considering Steve's friendship and long acquaintance with them, it seems natural for you all to spend time together outside the bedroom. You enjoy spending time with Eddie and Chrissy— they're warm, sociable, and fun. And you trust them. Eddie had proven himself trustworthy when he'd promised not to tell anyone about your secret; you know he'd kept that promise because there's literally no way Steve would've kept quiet if he'd found out you've faked every orgasm he thinks you've had with him. Though you've never gotten as close to orgasm as you had that first time with Eddie, you've been thoroughly enjoying yourself since. No complaints from any of you, as far as you can tell.

So it hadn't been difficult to decide as a group that you were ready to take things to the next level: that you wanted to explore penetrative sex together for the first time. This Friday had been chosen for the occasion.

Friday nights had unofficially been designated as group play since that first time you'd gone to Insa, and though you'd sometimes see one another on other days of the week, Fridays were a given. This gave you a little less than a week to prepare for the next step in your ongoing journey of sexual debauchery; a little less than a week to imagine what it would feel like for Eddie to be inside you for the first time. To some extent, the promise of the unknown makes those nerves squirm in your chest, but mostly, you're excited about it. 

When Chrissy called today and asked if you wanted to go to the mall with her, you eagerly accepted. An afternoon filled with powdery-soft smiles, shared giggle fits, and eager shopping ensued as you prepared for this upcoming weekend. You'd gotten mani-pedis, visited Lush to explore their offerings of natural facemasks and body butters, and, finally, spent an inordinate amount of time browsing for a new set of lingerie, one worthy of the occasion.

Shopping for lingerie with Chrissy was not like shopping for lingerie with Steve or by yourself. For one thing, Chrissy is much more adventurous than you regarding her undergarments: her preference is for as much edge and as little coverage as possible. You are slightly more conservative, gravitating towards cheeky panties over thongs and floral lace over faux leather. She'd chosen her own lingerie fairly quickly— a fuchsia v-string that was more strap than fabric, crotchless and with a satin bow in the front, with a matching push-up bra. For you, she'd held up many potential options that you quickly dismissed, but one set she suggested caught your eye. With Chrissy's keen encouragement, you'd tried it on; when you'd heard her squeal of excitement and gazed with wide eyes at your reflection in the mirror, you'd gathered enough courage to step out of your comfort zone and try out some adventure for yourself. 

Now, you're cloistered in the walk-in closet, twisting your body to examine it from all angles before emerging to show your barely-patient boyfriend your new lingerie.

"You gonna come out soon?" Steve's voice is muffled through the door, and you picture him sprawled on the bed, hair flopped over his brow, full lips in a pout as you make him wait. 

"Yes, Steve— honey, dear, darling one," you say with sing-song playfulness, biting your bottom lip as you run your eyes one last time over your body in the closet mirror before cracking the door. From the sliver, you see him sit up from his sprawl, head whipping toward the closet.

"Finally, jee—" He cuts off, eyebrows nearly to his hairline, hazel eyes wide, mouth falling comically open as you push the door open fully to reveal your body. You flush warm, a little smirk stretching on your lips as his gaze rakes over your body, devouring the sight before him.

The first thing that attracted you to this set was the color— a deep red, rich and heady like sweet fruit. The panties are embroidered with tiny flowers, delicate and feminine, not quite a thong but with less coverage than you'd usually choose. The bra is stitched with matching embroidery, but it's not a push-up like Chrissy's. You don't need that; you've got enough going on as it is. Instead, it's boned with underwire for just the right amount of support, and it's unlined— sheer, so your nipples show through, dusky and darkened beneath the red fabric.

When Steve recovers, he just husks a simple direction: "Come here, now."

It's a little brusque, but you chuckle as you approach him, pleased that he's so affected by the sight of you. When you climb onto his lap, Steve seems unable to decide what to do with his hands— brush them over your waist, palm the swell of your breasts, squeeze your hips, or cup your jaw and draw you in for a kiss.

But when you gently capture one fluttering hand, guiding it down to show him that your new panties are crotchless, same as Chrissy's, that decides it for him.

You gasp sharply as his finger plunges into you, his other hand grasping at your jaw to pull you in for a searing kiss. You're already wet from the anticipation of him seeing you like this, so he slides in with no resistance, groaning against your lips as he feels the evidence of your excitement. You wrap your arms around his shoulders, fingers drawing through thick strands as you open your mouth for him. His tongue in your mouth moves in tandem with his finger, stroking you inside, kindling the heat in your lower belly until you're rocking your hips into the heel of his hand. He presses it tighter to you, rubbing friction into your clit as you moan, pushing your breasts into his clothed chest.

Clothes. You realize then that Steve has on far too many clothes.

Pulling abruptly from his lips, you pant, "Take off your clothes, Steve."

Your hands accompany your direction, tearing at his shirt before he's even pulled his finger out of you. Together, you make quick work of it and his pants, hand finding his hard length as soon as his tight boxers are revealed, fingers wrapping around him as best you can through the fabric. He hums, hazel eyes dark with desire as he palms the back of your neck, pulling you into greedy lips that suck at your throat. "Wanna do you from behind," Steve rasps against your skin, and his words make your pussy throb with anticipation. That's your favorite position— face pressed to the sheets, ass in the air, Steve's cock reaching so deep inside you you nearly see stars.

You get wetter just imagining it. 

"Mmm," you moan, and Steve smiles broadly, huffing a chuckle that puffs warm against your skin. 

"Knew you'd like that suggestion, baby." 

"You like it, too," you remind him as you climb off, crawling across the bed until your head is resting just below the pillows; you drop your shoulders, widening your knees, peeking back at him as you sway. "I know you like to watch my ass bounce." You're teasing, but it comes out breathy and desperate as you see the way Steve's looking at your exposed pussy still framed by berry-red lace— like he wants nothing more than to stuff you full, to pound you until all you can do is cry out for him. 

Steve pulls his boxers down his legs, lifting one knee and then the other to drag them impatiently off and let them drop to the bedroom floor. He's long and straight, with a pale pink head that disappears into his fist as he strokes himself once, eyes still intent on your pussy as you watch him. As hairy as Steve's chest is, he's very fastidious about keeping himself well-trimmed beneath the waist, which only makes him look longer as he draws closer until you can no longer see him. You drop your head, fingers tightening on the bedspread as something brushes against your swollen lips.

You anticipate the head of Steve's cock, but instead, you feel the press of his fingers; and though it's not what you expected, you sigh in pleasure as he dips inside, stroking and working your inner walls until you're burning for more. "Steve…" you whimper, and he knows what you're asking for. You feel him press a warm kiss to one plush cheek before he withdraws, knee brushing your calf as he lines up with your entrance. 

The initial stretch is always the most delicious, and today is no exception: you moan, a long, low sound of relief as he presses inside until he nudges up against the end of you. "Fuck," you hear him say, voice husky with need as his palm finds the middle of your back, the fingers of his other hand digging into the heft of your hip. You obey his silent request, pushing your chest down to the bed until your back is arched further for him. "So fuckin' hot, baby," Steve murmurs. And then he slides almost all the way out of you before thrusting sharply back in, finally beginning to fuck you.

Your fire burns bright, stoked by the quick, deep drag of Steve's cock inside you, his hips slapping into your ass, his balls swinging against your mound, his fingers gripping tight to your hips, holding you in place so he can fuck you hard. It's really intense, this angle; your toes curl, and your fingers fist into the bedding as you pant and moan out your pleasure. Steve is even more worked up today than usual, and the knowledge that he's so excited by your body just adds to the twisting flames and the tightening of your abdomen as he jolts against that spot inside you. 

"Oh, Steve," you whimper, breath heaving, body rocked by his deep thrusts. Through the thin material of your bra, the bedspread drags against your nipples, making them harden and igniting tiny sparks of pleasure that kindle the burn in your belly.

Steve's breathing hard, too, with ragged gasps as he works to pleasure you, groaning when you squeeze around him as he hits especially deep. And maybe it's the fact that you'd just spoken— just whined his name— but Steve chooses then to remind you of what you'd agreed to try with him.

"Baby," he says, voice hoarse and a little breathless but still careful, "Do you think you could, like… try, uh, talking more?" 

You've had your eyes scrunched closed, entirely focused on the feeling of Steve's cock pounding you, but they pop open at that. "Oh," you say, a little wobbly as your body continues to rock under the onslaught of his cock. "Yeah, o-okay." 

You try to think of what to say; you really do. Little snippets you've heard from Chrissy knock against each other in your head: 'bad girl,' 'punish me,' 'lick my cunt,' 'fuck toy,' 'dirty slut,' 'shit— goddamn— cock— whore—' 

They swirl together until they're whipping by, stinging your outstretched fingers as you try to grab one. They stick in your throat as your eyes dart, freeze spreading in your chest the longer you stay silent. Just say something, you plead with yourself, anything, anything at all. Just say, 'Fuck my dirty little pussy, Steve.'  

But you can't. The words won't come out.

Your nostrils flare, your eyes prickling with frustrated tears as Steve's hips slow slightly. Quickly, you try to speak, but all that comes out is a stammer: "I… I—"

Steve's fingers loosen on your hips, rubbing gently along the plush of your ass, and you whimper in response to his soothing touch— a small, almost pathetic sound. "It's fine, babe. Don't worry about it." 

The softness in his voice makes the tears prick more insistently as your stomach churns with guilt. It's all he'd asked of you, and you couldn't even try to do it. "Are you sure?" You ask, voice tiny.

Rather than replying, Steve stops moving inside you, pressing close, draping himself over your back, wrapping his firm arms around your middle to hold you tightly. His body covers yours, warming you instantly, lips pressing to your shoulder blades, dropping kisses wherever he can reach. You can feel him murmur against your skin, bangs brushing you as he speaks. "Of course. I'm sorry I brought it up." Quietly, tenderly, he adds, "All I care about is being with you."

You melt at the sincerity in his voice, breath escaping in a sigh as the freeze drips away. "Okay," you say, more assured now. 

Steve drops one more kiss to your back, lips warm and dry and lingering there as he presses his hips experimentally tighter to your ass. You hum, flame flickering again as his length shifts inside you. "You really look so fuckin' hot right now," he rasps quietly against your back, and you hum as the compliment kindles the flame higher. "I can't get enough of you."

You bite your lower lip, pressing back into him, encouraging him as he rotates his hips against you, grinding his length deep. "Mmm, Steve," you murmur, breath quickening. "That feels really good."

"Yeah?" He grinds against you again, groaning as you whimper, pressing back in kind. "You ready for me to fuck you how you like it again, baby?" 

A moan slips from your lips, pussy throbbing as the silk of his words caresses you. "Yeah," you say, and though the air is cold when his warm skin leaves your back, the fire that reignites is hot when he grabs hold of your hips again, pulling back and thrusting into you hard. 

"Ah!" You cry out as burning pleasure twists in your belly; Steve resumes his pace, fucking you fast and hard, cock reaching so deep it's almost too much. "Steve!" You whine loudly, fingers clutching desperately to the bed, holding on as his hips pound into you. He's sticking to you now, skin clinging with damp sweat on every impact, groans nearly constant as his pace turns frenetic, losing that consistent rhythm as he gets close. 

"Fuck, y/n, you're gonna make me cum, baby," Steve moans, and his words flare low, increasing your pleasure as you cry out for him again.

And then you feel Steve's cock jerk, hips slowing as he gasps a ragged breath, stifling those groans in his throat, jaw tight as he cums inside you. You moan with him, panting with exertion even though he'd been the one fucking you. As he finally stops moving, holding himself inside, you press further back against him, wanting him as deep as he can get, relishing that point of connection between you. 

"Shit," Steve sighs, a sound of deep contentment as he carefully pulls out of you. You tilt further forward, raising your ass higher as you hear Steve's hasty footsteps pad out of the bedroom, presumably on the way to the bathroom to retrieve a washcloth. That's confirmed when he returns, and you feel the warm brush of soft wet fabric against you, gently wiping as you lower down and walk your hands back until you have enough leverage to kneel up on the bed. "Thanks," you say, twisting to take the washcloth from him. Your eyes run over pink cheeks flushed from exertion, a fine sheen of sweat on his brow, and those roguishly disheveled brown waves flopping over his forehead. You smile, leaning forward at the same time he does for a soft kiss. When you part, Steve cups your cheek affectionately, pressing one more kiss to your temple before you head to the bathroom to finish cleaning up. 

You return to find him lounging on your rumpled bedding, scrolling on his phone; as he spots you, he drops it on the bedside table, opening his arms wide with a charming grin. You smile, climbing onto the bed, giggling as his strong arms close around you, pulling you down against him. You rest your chin on his chest, fingers playing in puffs of hair as he looks at you fondly. "Hey," he murmurs, arm slung across your back, fingers trailing lazy patterns as you lay half-across him. "I was thinking we could try that Indian fusion place for dinner tonight. I heard they have this habanero chicken tikka that's apparently knock-your-socks-off good."

You gaze into your boyfriend's face, whose eyes— their flecks of green, brown, and amber— are so comforting. So cherished. You feel a sudden surge of appreciation for him: for his sense of adventure, for the fresh experiences he provides you, for the plans he always makes for you to enjoy together. 

Your lips curl with a tender smile. "Sure. That sounds perfect."

-

It's around eight o'clock on Friday evening, and you're reclining on the loveseat, casually turning the pages of the novel you're currently reading called The Very Secret Society of Irregular Witches. It's a cozy little fantasy about an orphaned witch and her journey to find a new family, and you aren't too far in, but you're very much enjoying the writing style and the main character. You find yourself so absorbed that your eyes don't even once flick to the clock in anticipation of your guests' arrival or to the television where Steve is watching some college sports game with rapt fascination.

You've long been ready for tonight by now— since seven, in fact. You'd showered, shaved, exfoliated, and moisturized; dried and styled your hair, applied light makeup, chosen your outfit— a casual pair of ripped jeans and a black long-sleeved shirt, soft and clingy, low-cut and shirred at the bust— and slipped your red set on beneath it. It feels a little delicious to be wearing such casual clothes atop such sumptuous lingerie, like you're a precious stone wrapped deceptively in old newsprint. It really is a beautiful color, you'd thought as you pulled it out of your drawer, laying it gingerly out on the bedspread. Though the thought had occurred to you that the shade seemed awfully similar to the gash of red you'd once seen on stage, you dismissed it as happenstance. You were more concerned with the impact it would make tonight. Considering how Chrissy and Steve had reacted to you wearing it, you're curious to see if it will have a similar effect on Eddie.

When there's a knock at the door, you're the first one up, padding over before Steve has torn his eyes away from the television screen. It sounds like someone may have just scored the game-winning basket, judging by the raucous cheering that bursts from the speaker as the door swings open to reveal a lopsided grin and dark frizzy curls standing tall beside baby blue eyes and bouncy blonde waves.

"Hi, Chris!" You say warmly, and the television goes silent as you embrace her first, arms closing affectionately around her sharp shoulders. Bow lips kiss your cheek, and you press a return kiss to powdery-soft skin, giggling as she squeezes you extra tight before letting you go. She's dressed casually, too, in a pair of yoga pants and a thin fuzzy sweater. You meet eyes, pursing your lips against identical grins loaded with the knowledge of what's concealed underneath your hang-out clothes. 

You hear the greeting Steve and Chrissy exchange, followed by the soft smack of their lips, but your eyes don't stray from the black and white of the man before you: white Reeboks, black joggers, white t-shirt, black ink, pale quartz skin, midnight-dark curls. Casual, comfortable, not just in the way he's dressed, but also in the way his lips crook, one dimple emerging, brown eyes bright as he steps closer and pulls you in with one arm slung around your waist. 

"Hi," Eddie says, smoky and warm, chin tilting down.

"Hi," you echo, smile instinctual as you tilt up to kiss Eddie hello.

It's not a particularly long or deep kiss, but the press of Eddie's lips against yours makes those moth wings flutter nonetheless, swirling the smoke of his voice you've just inhaled.

Steve takes your place to greet his friend when you step away, and they clap each other roughly on the back as you look for Chrissy— she's in the kitchen, fridge door open as she bends to look inside. "Hey," you call to her, "can you bring over the fruit salad?" You fold yourself onto the big couch, one foot tucked comfortably beneath you, the other leg swinging as you sink back into the cushions.

"Sure!" You hear her reply, but your eyes are again drawn to Eddie as he approaches with a quirked brow, brown eyes twinkling as they bore into yours.

"You're gonna eat fruit salad during a horror movie? And here I thought I was the weirdo. Clearly, you've got me beat." 

You scrunch your nose, sticking your tongue out at him as he flops into the corner of the couch, legs spreading comfortably to own the space like he always does. Eddie huffs at your attitude, making your gesture his own but dialing up the drama— broad tongue lolling, stretched out to his chin as his brown eyes go wide. You try to stifle the snort in your throat, but it comes out anyway, just half-choked and squeaky. You look pointedly away, but not before seeing his lips curl with a tiny smug grin.

The sight of Chrissy carrying your glass bowl of fruit salad along with her hummus and pita chips is a welcome one, and you smile sweetly as you reach to take it, cradling it in the crook of your thighs. She drops her snacks to the coffee table, wry as she tells you, "I'm gonna supervise the drink-making— Steve tends to be a little heavy-handed on the vodka."

"Don't I know it," you reply, equally as wryly, eyes happily dipping to fruity goodness— mixed berries and plump purple grapes all crowded together, succulently tempting. You choose a grape and pop it into your mouth, relishing that first firm squish as your teeth burst the skin.

"Ugh." An exaggerated sound of disgust has your gaze slanting to the left, expression flat as you take in the crinkle of Eddie's soft nose and dark brow. He's well in the throw of his theatrics as he rants, "Where are the shitty snacks? Hot dogs, pringles, gummy worms. I'd even settle for the long-time partner of motion pictures: popcorn." He sounds like he's complaining, but as you see his eyes dance, you know he's just feigning it. "Is this really how you treat your guests? Fuckin' hummus and fruit?"

You roll your eyes so he can't see the mischief in them, plunking the bowl onto the coffee table with a sigh. You make sure to sound utterly fed up as you retort, "Oh, just eat a strawberry." Without giving him any time to react, you push the fruit past those smirking lips and into his mouth.

His suddenly slack face fills you with delight, and your suppressed smile breaks free as he stares you down while he starts to chew. You can tell he wasn't expecting you to do that, but that he isn't mad about it either. "This… is actually good," he says, talking through the mushy mouthful of red fruit, struggling to chew while his lips want to smile, face all puckered with effort, brown eyes fond.

"Could've told ya that," you say, reaching delicate fingers into your bowl and leaning casually back like you haven't just forcibly shoved fruit into a man's mouth. You pick out a raspberry, then a blueberry, then a blackberry, cycling through all the fruits until you get to another strawberry. 

But on its way to your mouth, your wrist is abruptly snatched and diverted toward that plush set of smirking lips. "Hey!" you exclaim, feigning outrage as Eddie tugs your arm toward him. Your elbow lands on his thigh as you unbalance; in your distraction, he steals your fruit with his teeth, expression utterly devilish as your mouth falls open indignantly. 

"What can I say? You've converted me," he quips, words thick with half-chewed fruit. "Just can't get enough of these strawberries. Who knew?" 

Your breath catches as his lips close over your index and middle fingers, playfully sucking any remnants of juice from your skin. You're torn between amusement and fluttering attraction as you feel the wet warmth of his mouth, the slide of his tongue against your fingertips, and the squishy mush of fruit inside that somehow manages to be both disgusting and just the slightest bit erotic at the same time. Eddie seems never to swallow before he starts to speak, perhaps because he's speaking almost constantly, and you're seeing the evidence of that first-hand now.

You're torn for a moment, trying to decide which impulse to act on— amusement, arousal, or disgust. In the end, playful amusement wins out.

"Ugh!" You echo his exclamation from earlier, yanking your fingers from his mouth and wiping them off dramatically on your jeans. You wag a finger at him, expression stern like you're reprimanding a dog, though a chuckle breaks through as you scold him. "Now stop that! Get your own fruit!"

Grinning widely as if he's delighted you've decided to play with him, Eddie leans toward you, folding his expression into an exaggeration of petulance. "But I want your fruit—!" You dodge his grabby hands, snatching the bowl and turning away, stiff arm against his chest, giggling as you deny him.

A soft voice, tinged with exasperation, interjects. "Children, children," Chrissy says, and Eddie withdraws immediately, lounging back into the corner of the couch, elbow casual against the armrest as if he hadn't just been nearly wrestling you for the fruit bowl. You shift over to make room for her, tilting towards her as she sinks between you, primly handing over the plastic cups she's carrying and keeping one for herself.

You peer into your cup, lips puckering at the transparent liquid inside. "If I drink this, it's not just gonna be straight vodka, right?"

She smiles fondly, weaving her arm through yours. "Don't worry, I kept Steve under control."

"You're supposed to wait for the movie to start, dude. That's the whole point of a drinking game." You look at Steve as he sits down on your other side, puzzled for just a moment until you glance to the left to see who he's talking to. Of course.

As he lowers his cup, Eddie grins wolfishly. "Just getting a head start, Stevie," he replies, and Steve shakes his head as he wraps an arm around your shoulders. It's a snug fit on the big couch with the four of you— Steve's thigh is pressed up against yours, hip warm where he's squishing you between his solid side and Chrissy's thin frame beneath her soft fuzzy sweater. But if you have to watch a horror movie, this is how you'd prefer to do it: enveloped by comforting warmth, surrounded by limbs you can latch to when your heart inevitably starts to hammer in your chest. 

"Are we gonna turn off the lights?" Chrissy asks, sounding eager, and you suppress your reluctant whine as Steve extricates himself from you to oblige. As the apartment is plunged into darkness, you nestle back into the couch cushions, plastic cup under your nose, somewhat trying to hide behind it.

"How scary is this movie?" You ask, carefully neutral though your stomach is already squirming with nerves. No one seems to be as distressed as you, not even Chrissy, who, though she's already clinging to Eddie, has an excited gleam in her eye. So you keep the extent of your discomfort to yourself. Mercifully, Steve soon settles back beside you, the comfort of his citrus and sea salt cologne smooth in your nose.

"I keep forgetting you've never seen Halloween, babe," he says, and you glance at him to see his hazel eyes are shiny with the reflection of the television— the only source of light in the room. "It's, like, a classic."

"Well," you grumble, "I'm only here to get drunk. What is it again?" Your gaze darts to the ceiling as you try to remember. "Drink when you see a knife, drink when you see a pumpkin—"

"How 'bout you just drink when you get scared," Eddie suggests, lips crooking with a playful grin as you glance at him, pouting. "That way, it'll get less scary the drunker you get."

You huff, torn between amusement and exasperation. "Sounds perfect," you say, voice edged with sarcasm.

Chrissy's arm tightens around yours. "It'll be okay," she says, shooting you an encouraging smile. "Just hold onto Steve and me." 

Her sweetness warms you, and you snuggle into her side, taking a subtle bracing breath as Steve starts the movie. Here goes nothing.

Halloween isn't nearly as terrifying as some of the other modern horror movies you've had the displeasure of seeing— it doesn't seem to be trying to induce heart attacks through jump scares and gruesome effects. Instead, it smolders with tension, though some shocking moments still have your hand frantically clutching for Steve's fingers and your head ducking against Chrissy's shoulder. You drink when you see the others drink and take some little sips in between, too, falling into a state where your body is half-loose with alcohol and half-wound tight with adrenaline. Midway through the movie, Eddie stretches his arm along the back of the couch, and when you notice it, you toss a wary glance his way, anticipating an attempt to scare you. It preoccupies you, the promise— or the threat— of his calloused hand, a constant presence behind your head, though when he doesn't return your glance, you go back to halfheartedly watching the screen. 

When you jolt as Michael suddenly appears in the kitchen to kill Bob, and Eddie's hand shifts, dread spikes as you assume the worst. But his fingers are gentle on the back of your head, and he cradles your skull in his broad palm. Your breathing settles as he plays with your hair, scratching your scalp affectionately while a knife pins Bob to the wall in a gravity-defying display of violence. Truthfully, it's a welcome distraction, and you lean into his touch, eyes flickering from Michael's eerie head tilt to Eddie's shadowed face. When he notices you looking, a smile soft on your lips, a corner of his lips crooks back at you before his attention returns to the movie. Though his hand withdraws not long after, you sigh a slow breath out of your nose, strengthened now despite the lingering suspense of the film. You even find yourself cheering Laurie on with the others when she has her final showdown with Michael, nerves almost entirely forgotten as you get caught up in your desire for her triumph. And the ominous final image of Michael's missing body, complete with his signature heavy breathing, has you grinning instead of cowering at the twist.

"So," Steve asks you when it ends, "what did you think?"

"Mmm." You twist your lips, begrudgingly admitting, "I guess it wasn't that bad." You don't want to encourage Steve too much, lest he thinks you'll be willing to watch more scary movies with him after this.

"Did you get drunk?" Chrissy blinks at you innocently, and you peer down into your cup to find it mostly empty. You feel warm and loose and a little floaty, but not excessively so.

You answer noncommittally. "Kinda?"

She beams. "Then that's all that matters." You chuckle, setting your cup on the coffee table as the guys get up from the couch. 

Steve stretches his arms above his head, cracking his neck to the side, and your eyes are drawn to the sliver of skin between his t-shirt and the waistline of his jeans. He eyes you and Chrissy where you still sit on the couch together. "Shall we move this into the bedroom, ladies?" He asks, trying to be suave as he runs a hand through his hair before folding his arms against his chest in that move men use to show off their biceps.

You share a look with Chrissy. "Despite how lame that line was," you tease him, "I think we're probably still in." She giggles as Steve pouts. 

"Hmmm…" Chrissy plays along, waffling her shoulders. "I'm not sure… that may have been a little too cheesy for me. I might just head home."

"Aw, come on," Steve says, face falling at your teasing. You take Chrissy's hand in both of yours, shuffling backward as you pull her lightly toward the bedroom— guiding more than pulling her, really, since she's giggling as she walks forward with you. 

"You can do it, Chrissy," you coax, eyes wide and encouraging as your heels hit the bedroom carpet. "Persevere through the cheese. You're so close… almost there—"

"Rah!" Your heart leaps into your throat as hands clutch your shoulders from behind, accompanied by a playful, gravelly shout. 

Your scream is not so playful— you screech, loud and genuinely afraid as your chest spikes with icy panic.

Chrissy frowns, stalking past you as the hands quickly release your shoulders. "Eddie!" She growls his name sharply, face all scrunched up as you twist to watch him back away. He heaves with chuckles even as he eyes Chrissy plaintively, gasping,

"Wait, Chris, come on, I'm sorry, I'm— ow!" Eddie braces an arm protectively against his stomach to ward off further smacks, looking simultaneously amused and rueful as he cowers from his much shorter girlfriend. It's the first time you've seen Chrissy actually get upset, and you can't help but think she looks somewhat like a pissed-off chipmunk. She'd be scary if she weren't so cute.

"Don't apologize to me," she says hotly, crossing her arms and cocking a hip. "Apologize to y/n. Now." And after leveling him with one last withering once-over, she stomps away with a sharp huff, leaving you with Eddie in the bedroom.

Your heart is still racing, but the panic has eased now that you're past the initial shock. Eddie peers at you, face falling into sheepishness as he takes in your tense expression. He edges toward you slowly, mouth pulling into a crooked line of contrition, but you don't budge. Eventually, he stops a short distance from you; his head tilts, eyebrows raising as he opens his arms in silent offering. It seems he's letting you decide whether or not to accept his offer of a hug.

For a second, you just stare at him, annoyed that he would scare you when you thought he'd known how nervous you were during the movie. But those brown eyes are gentle now, the way you've noticed they get sometimes. And you know Eddie was just trying to play around with you; you suppose that, in his mind, he was continuing what you'd started when you shoved a strawberry in his mouth. So you close the gap, looking up at him dully as you draw near. 

The crooked line of his mouth tilts with a tiny smile as Eddie hugs you, arms wrapping snugly around your back, and despite yourself, you sling your arms around his narrow waist, chin propped against his shoulder. "I'm sorry," Eddie murmurs, voice puffing like hushed smoke against the side of your face and rumbling through his chest and into yours. "I didn't think you'd scream like that." 

You pout for one more moment in sullen silence before you relent. "It's fine," you grumble. "Just don't ever scare me again."

You feel Eddie's chest jump against yours as he chuckles once, but despite his laugh, his reply is sincere. "I won't."

And you expect him to let you go then— after all, his apology has been accepted. But Eddie doesn't release you yet. Instead, he sways you back and forth, just slightly, long enough to get you to sigh deeply as you relax into him. Your nose tucks against ticklish curls, inhaling smoke and delicate apples. "I'm sorry," he says again, quieter than before, lips grazing your temple as he turns his face toward you.

Your breath catches as his lips brush your skin, belly fluttering with wild wings as you feel his arms shift, palms dragging across your back in a slow caress. "It's okay," you whisper. And you've had your fingers wrapped around your wrist, locked behind the small of his back. But as Eddie shifts, as he touches you tenderly, after a moment, you touch him, too. You release your wrist to press your palms against his back, skin hot through his t-shirt. When you run them slowly upwards, smoothing over the plane of his back, Eddie's ribcage expands into yours in a deep breath, adam's apple bobbing as he presses you closer to him. And that earlier fear is nowhere to be found now; instead, you feel held. Cradled. 

Safe in Eddie's arms, like his calloused fingers are tending you somehow.

You can hear footsteps behind you, and you both loosen your arms and turn towards the bedroom doorway, where Chrissy is leading the forge with Steve close behind.

Her gaze whips directly to Eddie. "Did you apologize?" 

"Yes, yes, Chris, I apologized," you hear him say, though you're preoccupied with the soft embrace Steve wraps you in, citrus and solid limbs enfolding you against a broad torso. 

"You okay?" 

"Yeah," you sigh, and you mean it. "I'm fine. He was just joking around. He didn't mean to be mean."

Steve chuckles against your hair. "Sounds like Munson," he says, dry and fond. "As long as you're good."

You pull back slightly to smile as you meet Steve's hazel eyes. "I'm fine," you say more firmly, and Steve seems to accept that, smiling back as his arms release you gently.

As you pad across the bedroom carpet to wrap your arms around Chrissy's shoulders from behind, tucking your chin against her fuzzy sweater, any lingering tension is dispelled. Voice lightly teasing, you say, "Thank you for coming to my defense, my knight-ess in shining armor, but I think our good bard here has been thoroughly vanquished. He's sworn never to frighten me again."

You grin up at Eddie from your place on Chrissy's shoulder as his lips crook, cheek dimpling at you. "A solemn vow," Eddie says, palm on his chest as he dips into a shallow bow. "One that shall never be broken upon pain of excruciating death."

You feel Chrissy huff a chuckle. "So dramatic," she says as she clasps your forearms, squeezing once before letting you draw away. As she turns, you detect the glint in her blue eyes as they fall on your boyfriend. "Well," she says, bow lips curving in a sultry smile, "In that case… Steve, would you like to do the honors of unwrapping this present?"

She motions down her body with a delicate hand, and you watch as Steve's eyebrows shoot up, face lighting with zeal. As she saunters over to him, you turn back to Eddie to see his dark eyes watching you, assessing. But the weight of his stare no longer overwhelms you with nerves like it had the first few times you'd spent together. You aren't hesitant to draw close to him, eyes on your fingers as they reach out and dip beneath the hem of his white t-shirt, dragging lightly along his waist. 

When you look up at him again, Eddie's brown eyes are warm as he allows you to push his shirt up his stomach. You gather the fabric as it reveals pale quartz skin and the dark obsidian of his inked body armor. "Are you nervous?" he asks quietly, slowly drawing his arms through the sleeves as you guide the shirt up to his neck. Gently, you pull it over his head as you consider the question. You can't deny that some nerves writhe in your stomach as you think about what you're all preparing to do— why you're undressing one another, how this occasion will become something more than what you've all done together before. You've pleasured each other in other ways, but there's something… different about knowing that Steve would soon be inside Chrissy and Eddie would soon be inside you.

"Just a little," you answer truthfully, laying Eddie's t-shirt on your nearby dresser. Your fingers dip to the waistband of his joggers, fingers pulling the string to unravel the bow as you admit, "But mostly, I'm excited."

You can hear the smile in Eddie's voice as he replies quietly, "Yeah, me too." His words flutter those moth wings again, and a small smile blooms on your face as you carefully lift the elastic of his black sweatpants, tugging them down his legs to reveal a loose pair of checkered boxers. He steps out of his joggers as they pool around his feet, pale legs long and gangly as he extricates himself, hand landing on your clothed shoulder for balance. He chuckles at himself as he finally kicks the pants out of the way, and a fond smile tugs at your lips as you meet his eyes, warmed to deep amber in the soft light of your bedroom. "Okay if I take these off?" he asks, thumb rubbing lightly against the button of your high-waisted jeans.

You swallow thickly, fluttering wings and nerves kicking up at the sudden imminence of your new lingerie finally being revealed to him. Still, you nod, voice quiet but unwavering as you confirm your permission. "Yes."

Eddie's calloused fingers are careful as he pops the button and tugs down your zipper, reaching inside to find the hem of your black shirt tucked into your jeans. He peels the soft fabric up your torso and over your breasts, and your nipples harden behind the sheer fabric as they're exposed to the cool air. As your shirt joins Eddie's atop the dresser— albeit in a little crumpled pile of Eddie-typical carelessness— you stare at it, suddenly shy, delaying the moment where you'll look at Eddie's face and see his reaction. Eddie pauses before his fingers find the waistband of your jeans again, moving slightly faster now as he works to remove your pants. You feel the denim drag down your legs until it's gathered around your ankles. 

"Lean on my shoulder." Eddie's voice is hoarse as he rasps his instruction, and your eyes dart to his face, widening as you see him: he's on his knees before you, dark curls wild around his face and kissing his shoulders, plush lips pink and parted slightly as he stares up at you with those eyes. They're startlingly dark now, dark with heat, with smoke and promise as you obey. Your fingers twitch against his warm skin as your hand covers the ink of his shoulder, and you lift your foot for him. Eddie stares at you for a moment longer before his eyes dip almost reluctantly to his hands as he pulls the jeans from one foot and then the other. His fingers briefly skim the back of your soft calves, raspy touch featherlight as you take a sharp breath— and then he's rising fluidly, towering over you again, nearly-bare body close to yours as you tip your chin to maintain contact with his face. Because you couldn't tear your gaze from him if you tried— from that sharp jaw, that strong chin, that soft nose, those full pink lips, and those eyes, wide and framed by long lashes, lit from within as he devours the sight of you in delicate red lace. His gaze lingers on the swell of your breasts, the dusk of your hardened nipples, the softness of your belly, the curve of your hips, the red embroidery that conceals the promise of your heat.

And the way Eddie is looking at you— when you'd imagined how he might react, you hadn't envisioned this.

Eddie's fingers trace the curve of your waist, trailing fire in their wake, and you tingle as they meet your skin. "Wow," Eddie says quietly. "You look…" He trails off, and a crease forms in your brow, expression hesitant, vulnerable. His eyes find yours as he finishes his thought. 

"You're beautiful." 

And Eddie's voice is husky with desire, but there's something more— something gentle, something sincere, something you can almost taste on the back of your tongue. 

Your smile blooms, sweet and melty. Roots stretch, quivering further down into the fertile peat at the bottom of you. But now, a tendril of green also peeks through the dark, striving to emerge from the earth. Small, fragile. 

Alive.

Firm arms snake around your waist from behind and the trails of fire fall from you as a bare chest presses to your back. As Steve hugs you, you turn your head to watch Chrissy's sensuous approach as she draws close to you and Eddie. Her fuchsia lingerie set looks incredible on her— breasts succulently lifted by her push-up bra, straps crisscrossing her trim hips, the bow sitting low on her mound to reveal the smooth skin underneath, teasing a glimpse of her bare shave. Steve kisses the curve of your neck, and Chrissy twirls showily as she sees you and Eddie looking, shoulder cocked, delicate hand bracing on the willowy curve of her waist.

"C'mere," Eddie says playfully, and Chrissy squeals, giggling as he snatches her around the waist, tugging her against him and dipping her in his arms. Steve drops more kisses along the column of your throat, squeezing you close as Eddie's hand cups the nape of Chrissy's neck, plush lips pressing to the happy curve of her smile.

Steve's voice is awed and nearly incredulous behind you. "Shit, you two really look so fucking amazing."

Chrissy presses her cheek to Eddie's, blue eyes brilliant as she tips her chin down coquettishly. "Why thank you, Steve," she replies, voice pitched low and sultry. 

Steve hums, and your breath catches as his lips skim your ear, quickly finding that sensitive place at the corner of your jaw. "This look still hits hard, babe," he murmurs to you. "Can't wait to get my hands on you again." A slight breathy moan escapes your lips as he cups your breasts, palming their weight as you lean back against him, eyes falling to half-lidded. 

Your buzz hits you suddenly as Steve touches you while Eddie and Chrissy watch, flooding warm through your veins as he guides you to the bed. Hazy, floaty, and loose, you fall against the duvet, and Steve follows you closely. The king-sized bed is more than big enough to accommodate Steve as he hovers half over you, cupping your jaw as his lips descend on yours. It's more than big enough to accommodate Chrissy as she lays down on your other side, bouncy waves tickling your bare shoulder, thin arm brushing yours as she shifts. And it's more than big enough to accommodate Eddie as he stretches out on the other side of Chrissy, smoke voice rumbling in the barest moan as you hear the unmistakable sound of their kissing— lips smacking, mouths moving like yours and Steve's are. Steve runs an eager hand down your body, wasting no time to dip between your legs, and your knee falls open for him as he begins to explore you, rubbing slow, teasing strokes up and down your pussy without dipping inside, without lingering where you need him most. Your eyes close and your hand blindly seeks the edge of Steve's jaw, holding his face as you kiss him deeply, trying to encourage him to touch you where you need it with the fervor of your lips. After a long moment, after he's teased you enough to make you feel a little desperate, Steve obliges. He starts to touch your clit, one finger brushing lightly against it at the same time that you hear Chrissy sigh, high and feminine, "Yeah, Eddie, right there…." 

The sound of her pleasure encourages your own, and your hips twitch up into Steve's hand, tongue searching for his as you moan again. And in an undulating kaleidoscope of moving bodies, heavy breaths, quiet groans, airy moans, wet tongues, hot skin, and pressing digits, you all encourage each other's pleasure until Steve is fingering you deeply, the heel of his hand grinding against your clit as you throb, as that fire begin to smolder inside. Beside you, you can feel the slight rhythmic shifting of Chrissy's body as Eddie fingers her, too; and as your head falls to the side while Steve sucks on your neck, Chrissy's warm breath ghosts your lips as she pants lightly. 

"Mmm," you hum as Steve adds a second finger, stretching you open, insistent in his demand for your fire to increase. The sensations are almost overwhelming as your heart thumps hard in your chest, pumping desire and alcohol through your veins: the warm brush of Chrissy's body against yours, the wet sounds of the fingers moving inside you both, the hint of Eddie and Steve's subtle grunts and groans as they enjoy giving you pleasure. You feel Steve unlatch from your neck as your nose brushes Chrissy's, your mouth half-open as you sigh, a hairs-breadth from her pink bow lips.

"You should kiss," Steve mumbles, and your lashes part to reveal the sight of baby blue eyes, hazy and heated beneath strawberry-blonde bangs. "Kiss each other," he encourages, his other hand finding your breast, thumb flicking over your nipple as he continues to finger you deeply.

In the languid heat of your drunken pleasure, the idea of feeling someone else's lips on yours as Steve fingers you is appealing, and the smoldering flames flicker, spreading at the thought. You blink, searching her expression for a moment until her gaze drops to your lips. And when she tips her chin, you lean in, shifting closer to press your mouth to hers.

Chrissy's lips are delicate, and the experience of kissing her is distinctly feminine compared to kissing Eddie or Steve. Maybe it's the softness of her skin, or the scent of her perfume, or the flavor of her mouth— sweeter than theirs, a sweetness you've already tasted after Steve kissed her during Strip or Dare, just stronger now.

After a moment, Chrissy's mouth opens, tongue swirling against the seam of your lips as she tilts her head— and you notice that Chrissy is much less careful than Eddie was when he kissed you for the first time. When Steve groans low in his throat, she instantly becomes bolder, pink tongue darting into your mouth as soon as you open your lips, licking wet and sloppy. You're taken off guard at first, but you try to keep up with her as she sucks your lower lip into her mouth, the aggressive sting surprising you as she nips it. "Shit," you hear Steve groan, and Eddie hums as Chrissy releases you, lips pink and slick as you both withdraw, resting your heads back against the sheets, still facing each other. 

Steve's fingers are pressing harder into you, your body rocking with the force of his hand as your gaze darts from Chrissy to Eddie— his eyes are half-lidded and hazy as he drops kisses against her shoulder, the dark ink of his arm draped across her body, pale hand moving rhythmically between her legs as her hips undulate up into him. You watch Chrissy's face as you feel Steve prop up on an elbow behind you, husking an eager question. "Can you do that again?"

Since you're watching Chrissy's face, you see the moment her blue eyes suddenly glint, a little cheeky smile tugging at her bow lips. "Only if you and Eddie kiss."

The rhythm of Steve's fingers falters inside you, and Eddie's head pops up, brown eyes widening, dark curls brushing Chrissy's porcelain skin as he looks past you at Steve. His face is skeptical, and you know without looking that Steve is sporting the same expression behind you. When they're silent, Chrissy adds, voice low and sultry, "Come on… it's only fair."

You're not especially invested in the idea of them kissing, but since Steve is the one who suggested you and Chrissy kiss, you do agree with her. "Kind of a double standard otherwise," you point out.

Eddie eyes Steve, brow still furrowed in a doubtful frown, and you hear Steve swallow hard behind you. "I guess…" Steve says non-committally, clearly unsure.

Chrissy's cheeky smile widens as she stretches out, legs long and shapely against the sheets, head cocking as she glances between Steve and Eddie. You've never seen her look so devilish, words sultry and loaded. "If it's a good kiss, I promise we'll make it worth your while."

You wonder what she means— her voice seems to tease at more than just another kiss between you. But you don't have long to dwell on it as Steve's hand suddenly stops moving between your legs. When he pulls out his fingers, you glance to see him with eyebrows raised, head rearing as if to say, 'Why not?' And when you look back at Eddie, he's no longer frowning or quite as skeptical. Instead, his mouth is pressed into a long, thin line of acceptance. "Are we doing this?" Eddie asks, half-disbelieving, and despite your earlier ambivalence, heat sparks low as you hear Steve say,

"Yeah, I think we're doing this, man."

Steve kneels up, and you bend your legs to make room as Eddie does the same. You and Chrissy cuddle close, eyes rapt on the forms of your boyfriends as they shuffle towards each other on their knees. Your gaze dips, catching on cocks still half-hard behind tight black briefs and loose checkered boxers, and you drape an arm across Chrissy's waist as your heart begins to race with anticipation. 

You've never been especially turned on by the concept of men kissing. You know that other girls find it hot, and you don't have any problem with it, but it's never been particularly arousing for you. But suddenly, the concept of these two men— whose mouths have explored your heat, whose tongues have dipped into your pussy— kissing each other with those same lips is wildly erotic. 

Of course, this is still Steve and Eddie, so you almost can't hold back from rolling your eyes as Steve stops moving closer and exclaims, "Dude, stop staring into my eyes like that." 

The exclamation is followed by Eddie's typical wide smirk. "What, like this?" He flutters his eyelashes coquettishly, pursing his lips, exaggerating a kissy face as he leans close. Steve shoves his shoulder hard, but Eddie just laughs, husky and deep in his amusement. You feel Chrissy shake her head in exasperation beside you as they push each other around a bit before Steve gets fed up. "All right, come on," he says.

And then they're close enough to touch, a careful distance between their waists and bottom halves. Steve's hand lands on Eddie's upper arm, and Eddie braces against Steve's shoulder as they lean in. Eyes wide, you watch raptly as they draw close, hesitating for a moment before their lips meet. 

It's tentative, light, about as chaste as chaste can be until Chrissy reminds them in a sing-song, "Make it good.” And then Steve and Eddie mouths begin moving more firmly. And at the sight of those masculine faces pressing close— Eddie's plush pink lips on Steve's, the tiny flash of Steve's tongue— your pussy pulses hard, heat throbbing insistently in your lower half, thighs rubbing together to try to bring relief. You hear Chrissy sigh a breathy moan, fingers drawing down your side as she watches them with you. Steve and Eddie don't kiss for long, but when they break away, you can feel how much slicker you suddenly are.

When the men glance at you both, their cheeks are stained pink, unimpressed as you and Chrissy titter with glee, clutching at each other. "Hope you enjoyed that," Eddie says wryly. 

"Oh, we did," Chrissy says with wicked delight, and you nod your enthusiastic agreement. "Go stand next to each other," she adds, voice almost a purr, tipping her chin to indicate the end of the bed. "And take out your cocks."

The men scramble to oblige, and Chrissy guides you by the arm toward them as their boxers are unceremoniously dropped and kicked away. She slinks to the floor, and you follow her, albeit a little less fluidly. Still, any concern you may have felt about your awkwardness whisps from your head as you take in the sight before you: Steve and Eddie side by side, solid tanned bulk next to limber predatory paleness, their lengths bobbing closeby. You kneel, still unsure what Chrissy has planned; you glance at her to see dainty fingers wrapping around the base of Steve's long cock, bow lips smirking sensually as she murmurs, "Join me, y/n."

Your eyes widen, and a thrill tingles down your spine as you suddenly understand her intention. And Steve seems to realize at the same time you do; he exhales a sharp breath, hips twitching slightly as Chrissy's tongue outstretches, wagging tantalizingly near the pale pink of his tip but not yet touching. Your face draws closer until you can detect the heat radiating from Steve's throbbing head, feeling utterly naughty as you stick out your tongue to match Chrissy's.

And then, together, you lick up both sides of Steve's cock.

Your eyes dart to Steve's face as his mouth falls open and he watches with helpless fascination as you and Chrissy lavish his length. You lick along his side, base to tip and then back again, lips curling as you watch Chrissy tongue lazily at his slit. "Oh, fuck," Steve groans, head tipping back as you suck underneath the base before drawing your lips to his tip, face close to Chrissy's. Together, as if you'd coordinated it, you begin to lick kittenishly at his head, tasting the salty musk of his precum, tongues brushing as you drag them against his heated flesh. "Shit, that feels so—" Steve cuts off with a desperate grunt as Chrissy wraps her lips around him, sucking sharply as you latch to the side.

As Steve's breathing becomes ragged, you register a second set of labored breaths. Your eyes flick to Eddie's as if by instinct; his gaze is locked on your faces, on your lips as you and Chrissy suck Steve's cock. You flush hotter under the intensity of his stare, and automatically, you reach out for him, hand drawing lightly up his calf, fingers tickled by his sparse hair. Chrissy pops off Steve then with a wet smack, pressing one last teasing kiss to his head. "Worth it?" she asks, looking up at him with a foxy smile. 

Steve runs a hand roughly through his brown waves, disheveling them. "Yeah," he replies, wide eyes darting to his friend as you and Chrissy shift your attention. "Dude, this is so fucking hot," Steve mutters, and you watch Eddie's adam's apple bob in a hard swallow as you and Chrissy settle before him, dark eyes flitting back and forth between you. You throb as your gaze settles on his thick length, which sticks proudly from that thatch of dark hair that trails upward to his navel. You lick up the side as Chrissy takes Eddie's head into her mouth without hesitation, bobbing deep as he moans hoarsely. But the sight of those dark curls ignites something carnal in you, so after a moment, you lick back down to Eddie's base to shove your nose, your face against the hair there. Eddie's scent is musky, heady, tantalizing as you kiss his heated skin, tongue darting out to taste the underside of his cock as Chrissy continues to suck him insistently. 

You glance up to see the evidence of your attentions, the reactions you so desire: that pink flush on Eddie's cheeks, that jaw tightened with tension, those eyes dark and inky. Eddie hums, higher than usual, as you mouth downwards, seeking more of his reactions. You suck one of his balls into your mouth, pulling lightly as you watch him with rapt attention. A little desperate crease forms between his brows; his nostrils flare, and his plush lips fall open in a delicious moan. The sight and the sound have you pulsing, desire twisting in your belly at the sudden desperation in his expression.

Abruptly, his calloused fingers are in your hair, tightening against your scalp, and when you moan around Eddie's ball, his hips jolt as he gasps. "Okay, okay," he rasps, voice tight and high as his other hand finds Chrissy's head, stilling her movements. "That's…" he chuckles breathlessly, sucking in a deep breath and letting it out as a sharp sigh. "Shit." 

Chrissy giggles as she pops off his tip, and you release him gently, instinctually leaning into his touch as his fingers flex against your scalp, scratching slowly. "Alright," Chrissy says, looking up at the two men. "We've had our fun. I think it's time for the main event."

Your stomach flutters at her pronouncement, wild wings and nerves mixing as you watch her rise fluidly, blue eyes locked on hazel. Your gaze flicks to amber brown. Eddie's eyes are deep and heated with desire as he stares down at you, his hand finally falling from your hair as you stand up. 

You're all silent for a brief moment before Steve runs a hand through touseled brown waves. "So, how are we doing this?" His eyes dart around the group, landing on each of you briefly. "I could flip a coin," he offers. And it strikes you as almost ridiculous— that you should decide which mixed couple will have sex first with a coin toss. But, considering the very prescriptive plan for how you're about to have sex, you suppose it doesn't make things much odder.

When you'd decided to try penetrative sex for the first time, Steve had been adamant that it be structured as follows: that one couple would have sex while the other watches and that you'd then switch roles— observers and performers. This was to ensure that everyone could enjoy the experience of both watching and participating, Steve had said. The logistics of it— how the guy would stand at the end of the bed and the girl would lay down on her back, surrounded on both sides— felt a little… Handmaid's Tale -esque to you. Unnatural. Almost a little transactional. But Steve had invested a great deal of time and energy in convincing the group of this, so you weren't going to question it.

Steve manages to find a quarter, and the sight of his hard cock bouncing as he flicks the coin in the air and slaps it onto the back of his hand is almost comical. "Call it," he tells Eddie. 

"Tails," Eddie says, and the flutters and nerves surge wildly in your stomach. 

Because when Steve reveals the toss, there's a fifty-fifty chance that Eddie's about to fuck you.

Steve lifts his palm, peering down at the result. Your eyes don't leave his face, breath caught in your throat until his gaze darts to Chrissy. "It's heads," he says, hazel eyes wide as Chrissy beams, blue eyes shining. 

Steve watches her, grinning as Chrissy flounces onto the duvet, taking his place at the foot of the bed as you and Eddie lay out on either side of her. And your head is thoroughly swimming now when you pillow it on Chrissy's shoulder and she wraps her thin arm around you. You blink slowly as you watch her reach down, pink-painted fingers wrapping around Eddie's thick length; your eyes catch on Steve's broad hand as he presses Chrissy’s thighs open for him. And then they dart restlessly, catching on fuchsia and ink and skin and skin and skin until they settle, finally, on your boyfriend's face as Steve lines the head of his cock up with Chrissy's entrance. 

It's surreal— the moment Steve pushes inside, disappearing into Chrissy as his hips cant forward, long bangs falling in a tumble over his forehead, dusting his eyelashes. You can feel her body shift against yours with the press of his hips, almost as if it's you he's fucking. But Steve's not fucking you. He's fucking Chrissy, sweet Chrissy with her powdery-soft smiles and her expensive perfume and her trim waist and her bow lips that open in a long, feminine moan as Steve slides home to the hilt. And it feels like there's a brief pause, a moment where things hang suspended, motionless, like the last few silent seconds of a song before the next track begins. In that pause, you suck in a slow breath, mixed emotions swirling as your gaze drags over the familiar curve of Steve's biceps, the thick hair on his chest, the breadth of his torso, the dip of his navel, and then the thin, pale legs spread open by his hands, splayed apart for Steve to take what he wants. For him to give Chrissy what she wants.

And then he's moving.

You can feel the brush of Chrissy's hair against your forehead, the sway of her body as Steve begins to thrust into her, strokes long and even as she arches her back against the duvet, a seductive stretch that accentuates the lithe lines of her body. You can see Eddie on the other side of her, the darkness of his wild curls as he ducks to her neck, kissing her there as Steve rocks her body. "Mmm," Chrissy moans, a sensual purr of satisfaction. "That's it, Steve— fuck me hard. Give it to me good, baby." 

He groans, lips pulled into a crooked smirk as he increases his pace, fucking Chrissy harder, hips slapping into flesh as the rocking of her body against you intensifies. "Oh fuck, you're so goddamn tight—"

So that's the kind of talking Steve was looking for. That swirl of emotion flares within you again— amorphous, scrambled, not entirely pleasant as you watch your boyfriend's eager eyes lock on Chrissy's perky breasts bouncing within fuchsia padding. Chrissy whimpers, fingers tightening against your waist and around Eddie's cock as she whines, "Touch me." 

You realize quickly that she doesn't mean Steve— he's already touching her, fingers pressing into her thighs, holding on tight as he drives into her. She must mean Eddie; she must mean you. So you oblige her: you gently touch her trim waist, fingers dragging featherlight against smooth skin as you draw your hand toward her belly button, up to her ribs, tracing random patterns. She sighs and hums, filthy words of encouragement spilling from her lips, egging Steve on. 

You don't watch the path of your hand as you touch her; instead, your eyes are locked on Steve's face, on the pinch of his brow, the heat you can see swirling behind his hazel eyes as he voices his desire. So it takes you by surprise when you feel the brush of calloused fingers against yours— fingers too rough to be Chrissy's, too far away to be Steve's. Your hand pauses, eyes darting to see limber fingers beneath ruddy knuckles, ghosting softly over yours.

Your breath catches as the raspy touch tingles your skin, fluttering low in your belly as Eddie's hand touches yours while you both caress Chrissy like she'd asked. You lift your head slightly to peek at his face, and your heart thumps as you see him looking back— dark eyes like molten ink, thick and drippy with promise. 

Eddie's fingers leave yours after the briefest moment, continuing their journey across Chrissy's body, and you do the same, tracing a path low on her hips. But the contact has shifted something within you. Whereas before, you'd been torn watching Steve fuck Chrissy, emotions swirling into a cloud approaching unease, you're now more focused on the tease of Eddie's touch, the anticipation of what's soon to come. You let your hand wander back towards Chrissy's middle, exploring, testing, hoping to feel the rasp of Eddie's fingertips again. And as his hand mosies across her skin— cupping her breast briefly, dragging over her side, dipping to her hip and then back up— it happens again. His hand finds yours, warm and rough as he draws his fingers over your hand, and your heart thumps as you feel it, a new feeling emerging within the emotional swirl inside. You tease Chrissy's ribs, dragging the backs of your fingers up her side before curving over to meet Eddie's hand again. And this time, you're the one to touch him: you stroke across the back of his hand, thumb brushing ruddy knuckles as your eyes flit to meet his again, finding molten ink as if by instinct.

Chrissy tilts her head then, and Eddie's eyes break from yours as she nudges toward him. "Mmm, baby, you're so hard," she murmurs sensually. "Is it turning you on, watching him fuck me like this?" 

You watch Eddie's full pink lips quirk with a tiny smile, but he doesn't reply; he just kisses her. You blink, eyes darting away to watch the rhythm of Steve's hips instead. You curl a little closer to Chrissy's rocking body, head slipping lower as you gaze up at your boyfriend. It strikes you how handsome he is then— how strong he looks as his abdomen rolls, skin damp with sweat, hair tousled attractively over his brow and against his neck as he works Chrissy to their mutual pleasure.

You hear the soft smack of Chrissy's lips as she separates from Eddie to moan loudly, back arching again against the bed. "Yeah, yeah, Steve, fuck me," she whines, drawing out the words, and Steve's hands shift suddenly— your eyes widen as you're jostled when he lifts Chrissy's hips, planting one knee against the bed, strong and proud as he fucks her even harder. 

Chrissy's eyes brighten with delight, lips curving with an eager smile. "Ooh, Steve," she squeals, "That's it. Fuck my naughty cunt, stretch me open—"

Her airy feminine moans mix with the impact of Steve's hips and his groans, hoarse and deep. "Yeah, baby, oh, shit—" His even rhythm begins to falter in a tell-tale sign of his approaching orgasm, and Chrissy giggles, purring,

"Is my tight little pussy gonna make you cum, Steve?"

You can see the desperation in Steve's face as his lips fall open, moaning, panting, cheeks flushed as he groans, "Yeah, yeah, fuck—" 

And then he's pulling out, wrapping one arm under the small of Chrissy's back to support her as his other hand grips his length, tugging quickly. You watch his pink head disappear into his fist once, twice— and then he grunts, hips canting, groans stifled in his throat as his cum paints Chrissy's porcelain stomach. It spurts in lines as he strokes himself evenly before slowing, squeezing tight near his head, and you watch it drip from his slit into thick drops above Chrissy's fuchsia thong. 

And the sight of Steve's cum on Chrissy's abdomen makes your stomach flutter with excitement— because it's hot and erotic, but also because it means that it's your turn with Eddie next.

Chrissy's arm tightens around your back, hugging you closer as Steve lowers her back down. She tugs you and Eddie close as she says, sweet and bright, "Mmm, that was fun!" 

The delight in her soft voice, coupled with the flutters in your stomach, make you feel affectionate. You smile, nose nuzzling against her collarbone, arm wrapping just underneath her breasts to hug her back, careful to avoid the mess of Steve's spend on her skin. 

"I'll get you a towel," Eddie offers, and the sudden sound of his smoky voice has your heart thumping as you feel the mattress shift when he gets up. 

Another hand squeezes your arm, and you twist away from Chrissy to look into Steve's face, flushed and radiant as he beams at you. You smile automatically back as he reaches for you, wrapping your arms around his neck as he pressing kisses to your cheek. Steve seems happy, making you happy as you draw away, smoothing back his bangs as the mattress dips again— likely from Eddie returning with a towel for Chrissy. You chuckle as Steve’s bangs flop back into the same position, nearly covering his eye.

Steve's smile softens as he gazes into your eyes before kissing you tenderly. "Did you like watching me?" he asks, a quiet murmur close to your lips.

"Yeah," you say softly, fond as his eyes brighten at your answer. "You looked hot," you add, and when he beams at you again, you press one last kiss to his cheek. And then, you feel a soft touch against your hip. 

You turn your head quickly but keep your arms around Steve's neck, heart leaping until you register the pink-painted nails and delicate fingers. Your eyes find Chrissy's baby blues, her bow lips flushed and pulled into an encouraging smile. "Your turn," she says, and you feel Steve kiss your temple as you realize that her abdomen is clean, she's shifting over on the bed, and Eddie's standing at the foot, watching you silently.

Ink on quartz, black on white.

Steve gently removes your arms from around his neck. "Lie down, baby," he says, one hand applying gentle pressure to your shoulder.

But when your eyes dart from black and white to the soft indent of the duvet in the center of the bed, you frown. That feeling of unnaturalness hits you again; the prescriptiveness of just laying flat, waiting with Steve and Chrissy by your side for Eddie to fuck you. 

You don't want this to feel like some transaction. You don't want to just lie down. 

"Wait," you say softly, pulling from Steve's light grip and shuffling over until you're kneeling in front of Eddie. He watches you as you approach, hands hanging by his sides. And his cock is sticking from that thatch of dark hair, but you don't reach out for that. Instead, you cup his neck, drawing closer until you feel the press of his hot head against your belly, the rasp of his hands on your hips as they settle there. Eddie's brown eyes are deep as you gaze into them for a moment before tipping your chin and pressing your lips to his.

You can feel his warm breath tickle against your upper lip as he sighs slowly, leaning into your kiss. Eddie's lips are plush and soft as you move your mouth against them, coaxing him until his hands shift, smoothing over your skin until they meet at the small of your back, holding you closer. You drag your fingers up as he deepens your kiss, burying both your hands in the curls at the nape of his neck, belly fluttering, pussy pulsing as you feel his length twitch where it's pressed between your stomachs.

"They shouldn't have all the fun," you hear Chrissy say behind you. And then she giggles, lips smacking as she kisses Steve. You press a little tighter to Eddie, relishing the feeling of his warm chest against yours, the rasp of his thumbs as he rubs them softly against your back, the heady, tantalizing scent of him in your nose— smoke, apples, and musk, that scent that's growing ever more familiar, ever more comforting every time you inhale it. It swirls down, filling you inside, transforming into plumes of rich, heady feeling as you open your mouth for him, leaning into the soft brush of his tongue against yours. 

And once this moment no longer feels unnatural or transactional, you pull back to gaze into warm brown eyes. Eddie smooths your hair back, and you sigh, leaning into his touch as he murmurs, "Are you ready?" 

Your answer is immediate. "Yes," you whisper, and Eddie smiles softly as he kisses you one last time— so light, so delicate that it nearly makes your eyes sting. 

And then you lay down.

Steve's arm is underneath your head, your hair fanned across his bicep as his other arm rests just beneath your breasts. Chrissy's head finds your shoulder opposite Steve, and your arm curves almost automatically around her as she lays out on her side, arm resting in the curve of her waist, hip cocked, limbs long and willowy against the duvet. "Put your legs up," Steve tells you, and you rest your calves against Eddie's shoulders as he shifts closer. 

You feel a little exposed like this; your brow creases, vulnerable eyes peering at your painted toes— white nails even paler against the backdrop of Eddie's dark curls, which tickle the bottoms of your feet as he cocks his head. 

"Your feet better not smell," Eddie says, and your eyes flit instantly to his face, to those warm eyes dancing with his tease.

Scoffing, you retort, "They don't!"

Eddie snatches your foot suddenly, pressing his nose to your toes. You tense and squeal as he snuffles against your skin, trying not to squirm and kick him— but almost instantly, he releases you, hand returning to its place on your thigh. "Nah, you're good," he says teasingly, and his playful smirk spreads when you giggle. 

Steve presses his naked body tighter against your side; Chrissy's waves brush your skin as she turns her head slightly, staring between your legs. And when you see the playful smirk slide from Eddie's face, as you feel him shift a little closer, your own mirth fades as your gaze darts to Eddie's cock— somewhat shorter than Steve's but thicker, head blushed dark pink, bobbing just above the red embroidery of your crotchless panties. 

Your heart begins to thump hard in anticipation, sparks smoldering low as you watch Eddie's hand wrap around the base of his cock, guiding it toward your heat. Your hips shift as you feel his tip brush lightly against your slick flesh; you bite your lip as you inhale slowly, a little shakily. And when Eddie pauses, you meet his dark eyes, and you nod, hair brushing Steve's arm underneath you.

Steve's hand suddenly is at your cheek, turning your head to capture your lips in a deep kiss. Your eyes slip closed as you feel Eddie nudge against your entrance, hot and silky and unyielding as he presses closer and closer and closer—

And then you whimper into Steve's mouth as Eddie's head pops inside you.

The first stretch is always the most delicious with Steve, and it is delicious with Eddie, too. But though you already know he's thicker than Steve, you hadn't realized just how much thicker until he's stretching you open, inner walls burning as he eases in. It's a tight fit, and you suck in a sharp breath as he presses forward evenly. Eddie's not moving particularly fast, but it's still a little too intense, a little painful, so you pull from Steve's lips, brow crinkled as you glance up at Eddie to ask waveringly, "C-Can you… go slower?"

Eddie stops moving immediately, fingers tightening on your thighs. "Of course," he says quickly. And you make a tiny sound in your throat as he soothes his hands up your legs, rough skin rasping up your soft shins and down again to your thighs. It gives you something to focus on as you adjust to him, and you sigh, eyes slipping closed as Steve presses kisses to your cheek. Steve's lips and Eddie's hands relax you, and before long, the burn fades to a pinch. And when the pinch fades, too, you open your eyes, shifting your hips to encourage Eddie to move. 

You watch him as he presses forward again, eyes dragging over his features in a soft caress— the wild tangle of his curls, the softness of his nose, his full pink lips, the strong column of his pale throat, the ink of his dark armor as it cascades over his shoulders and chest and down his arms. And as you swallow him up with your wet warmth— as Eddie pushes further and further into you until his hips are snug tight to your skin, and his dark hair is pressed to the red lace of your panties— you feel that flickering flame burn hotter until you finally ignite.

You moan quietly as Eddie pulls out and then again as he presses back in, setting a gentle pace. And the drag of his thick cock inside you makes your breath quicken, your desire licking up your belly as Eddie starts to fuck you slow and even. 

Steve's voice is right in your ear, but he isn't speaking to you. "Does her pussy feel good?" he rasps, and the puff of his warm breath against your skin, coupled with the feeling of Eddie's cock inside you, makes your hips squirm. 

Eddie's fingers tighten on your thighs as he feels you move. "Y-yeah," he replies, and your breath catches as you hear his voice— it's rough but higher than usual, a little shaky, and the idea that being inside you affects him like that makes your desire coil tighter in your belly. Steve hums, sounding pleased as his lips trail over your jaw, dragging down until he's sucking at your throat. His hand finds your breast, kneading it lightly; on your other side, you feel Chrissy shift as she lays on her back, twisting her hips attractively, lifting one hand to play with your hair as you sway slightly with Eddie's gentle thrusts.

Suddenly, you no longer need gentleness. 

You build your courage up until you can say softly, "You can go faster now. If you want," you add shyly. Instantly, Eddie speeds up, and you moan as each impact of his hips begins to jostle you in Steve's grip. It's exactly what you'd wanted— Eddie's pressing in deep now, the steady, quick drag of his cock stoking your fire, pale hips smacking against your thighs. 

It feels good. It feels really, really fucking good.

"Mmm, I love watching you," Chrissy purrs, voice a sultry hum, and you glance to see her staring intently up at Eddie. "You're so fucking hot, babe." 

Your eyes dart to Eddie, too, and you watch as he chuckles breathlessly, jaw tense, nostrils flaring as he glances at Chrissy. Steve pulls your face to him, tongue snaking between your lips, and though you kiss him back, your eyes dart to Eddie again. And when that inky stare flicks to you, seeing you watch him as you kiss your boyfriend, Eddie groans quietly, a low rumble in his throat. 

Your hips twitch at his sound, excitement increasing at his reaction; as you shift, Eddie jolts against a spot inside that sparks deep in your belly. The sensation makes you gasp— your lips open wide against Steve's mouth, muffled against his lips as you whimper. You hear Eddie grunt, throaty and deep, as his fingers tighten on your legs. Your desire twists hotter, tighter as you elicit his reaction, at the knowledge that your sounds, your gaze, and your body give Eddie pleasure. That knowledge sinks inside you, sticky and thick, moving syrupy through your veins until you're burning with satisfaction.

Your gaze returns to your boyfriend as Steve pulls his lips from you. He strokes back your hair, cups your cheek, pupils swallowing hazel as he rasps, "That's it, honey, make him feel so fucking good."

And it's exactly what you'd just been thinking. But to hear Steve voice it….

He kisses you deeply again, and you let him, but that swirl of emotion begins to cloud within you as you ponder his words. Steve hadn't asked, 'Does his cock feel good inside you?'. And he hadn't said, "I want him to make you feel so fucking good.' And even his fingers kneading your breast or the sensual warmth of his tongue as it brushes yours can't distract you from that sudden realization.

You pull your mouth from his, head tilting as you sigh, hoping the curve of your neck will invite Steve's lips. And it does— he seems not to notice, mouth dipping to suckle at your throat as your body rocks with Eddie's thrusts and Chrissy trails her fingers up your side. And it's so much sensation— so many bodies around you, so many hands on your skin that you can't focus on any one thing, pulled along by the current of lust and desire surrounding you.

But then Eddie's nose brushes softly against your ankle, and you meet his eyes again. He nuzzles there, and his lips are plush, nearly ticklish, as his mouth ghosts your skin. You can feel his breath as he asks you a quiet series of questions, voice stuttering slightly with the rhythm of his hips: "Is it good? You want it faster? Slower?"

Eddie is standing at the foot of the bed. He's towering over you as you lay spread out on the duvet below him, feet to either side of his head. Physically, he's about as far away as he could possibly be while having sex with you.

And yet he's never felt closer.

That amorphous swirl of emotion transforms, blooming with heat and pleasure and flutters and more as you stare into Eddie's face. "No," you reply, "it's— it's good like this." Your voice is almost a whimper as you add, "I-It feels really good, Eddie—" 

You hear his breath catch sharply in his chest. And as you watch his face twitch, dark eyes wide as he stares down at you, you wonder at this reaction, at what may have elicited it. As Eddie fucks you a little harder, brow now contorting in pleasure, face beginning to flush, you realize: 

It's the first time you've said his name while you've been intimate. 

It may even be the first time you've said his name to him at all.

The knowledge that Eddie's name on your lips made him react— made him feel— ignites within you, and you're suddenly desperate for what you'd imagined that first time you’d been with him: how he'd sound and what he'd look like when he cums while you're having sex. And you've seen him cum before, but this… this is different. 

And you want it. You want it so bad that the burn in your belly turns to an ache that only increases as you moan, and Eddie moans, and your hips shift into him, and his fingers tighten on your thighs, holding you closer as he pounds you deeply. Steve is sucking on your neck, and Chrissy is humming eagerly as Eddie's rhythm starts to stutter, but they don't matter now. All that matters is the feeling of Eddie's length as it twitches inside you, the heat of his eyes as they bore into yours. His plush lips fall open, and that pink starts to spread on his black and white—

Clambering, shifting— the mattress dips, and suddenly the back of Chrissy's strawberry-blonde waves are all you see as she straddles your waist. She's sitting low on your stomach as Eddie thrusts into you, and the pressure sharply increases your pleasure. But you're bewildered, disoriented at the sudden change, eyes darting over her sharp shoulder blades as she asks, "Are you close, baby? Are you gonna cum?"

"Yeah," Eddie says, tight and high, and your breath catches as you feel him twitch inside you again. 

"Cum on me." Chrissy's sweet voice is whiny with need. "Please, Eddie, I want it."

"Okay, sweetheart," you hear Eddie say. And then that delicious stretch inside you is suddenly gone.

Abruptly, Eddie pulls out of you, and your hips jerk, pussy pulsing reflexively around nothing at the sudden absence of him. From behind, you can see Chrissy's arm moving as you stare at her back. Your brow crumples as you hear Eddie— that smoky voice moaning out his release as Chrissy hums with satisfaction. 

But you can't see him. You can't see anything but Chrissy.

In the aftermath of Eddie's release, everything calms, settling like a wave receding back into the ocean. The burn in your belly eases, the ache inside you fades, and the desperate want sinks into a quiet sense of emptiness as Chrissy kneels up, her weight no longer resting on you as she kisses her boyfriend. As Steve pets back your hair, you turn your face to him, looking into his hazel eyes— warm, comforting, familiar. He cradles your cheek, and you lean into his touch, relishing the softness of his hand against your skin as he kisses you tenderly. "That was so sexy, honey," he murmurs, sighing contentedly. "Fuck, I love you." 

You smile as his praise trickles into that small space inside, beginning to fill it. "Love you too," you reply, wrapping your arms around his torso. You ignore the soreness in your lower half as you shift your legs out from under Chrissy, draping one over Steve's hip in a full-bodied embrace. 

And as Steve envelops you with citrus and strength, you bury your face in the crook of his neck, breathing him in, hoping his scent will chase the lingering emptiness away.

-

Once everyone has cleaned up and returned to the bed to cuddle, you're wedged between Steve and Chrissy, warm and languid. Your body is soft with the afterglow of spent pleasure as Steve tucks his nose against the nape of your neck, arms wrapped around you from behind. You're warm and languid, but you aren't relaxed— you can't stop thinking about that tiny formerly-empty place inside, prodding at it with morbid fascination, trying to figure out the source of your unease.

Because it's filled now, but not with Steve's crisp scent, or his strong arms, or his praise, but with a vague sour tang that clings bitterly to your gums as you watch Chrissy lay half-across Eddie's chest, fingers playing in his dark hair. 

The feeling isn't overwhelming; it's small, barely there, really. You prod at it again, and it clings viscous and rancid to your fingertip. You know what it is because you've felt it before— typically when you happen upon pictures of gorgeous women with perky breasts and tight stomachs and trim thighs.

It's jealousy. You feel jealous.

You sigh slowly through your nose as your gaze runs over Chrissy's baby blue eyes, her pink bow lips, the softness of her strawberry-blonde hair as it cascades over Eddie's skin. Though you have felt insecure when comparing yourself to Chrissy, it's never been directed at her— just internally at yourself. She's never made you feel sour before. 

You decide it must be because your boyfriend has now had sex with her. You're resentful since she'd been able to talk dirty to him like he wants, since she can fulfill that desire for him when you clearly can't.

Yes, that must be it. 

You assess the weight of your feelings, measuring it against the memory of your girls' trip to the mall, your enjoyment of Chrissy’s company, and how her eager kindness and encouragement make you feel. And you consider the fun you've had with her— the fun you've had with Eddie and Steve, too. You'd grown to really appreciate the time you all spend together: singing karaoke, going on double dates, or even just hanging around your apartment. Steve seems happy with your arrangement, and so are you. You're enjoying yourself immensely, and if you're honest, you aren't ready to give that up just because you've gotten a little jealous.

I'm a big girl, you think. I can handle my feelings. It's not a big deal.

So you reach out, drawing your hand down the back of Chrissy's head, fingers stroking silky blonde waves as she glances at you. Eyes brighten; smiles are exchanged. And when she shifts toward you, thin arms wrapping around your neck as she tugs you closer and you giggle, the sour tang begins to fade. 

-

Late at night, once Steve's snores fill the dark quiet of the bedroom, you pull out your phone. The blue light illuminates your face as you swipe it open, navigating to the Spotify app. 

It's your turn to send a song this time.

You do this often. Every few days or so, your fingers will search blindly for your phone on your bedside table, bleary eyes peering at the screen once Steve's form is motionless beside you. And if there's a message on your lock screen, you'll carefully tug open your drawer, pull out your headphones, and listen to the song Eddie has shared. And if it's your turn to share, you'll pull up Spotify, searching for a track you're in the mood to share that night.

You know already which song you want to send Eddie tonight: Touch Tank by Quinnie. You discovered it about a week ago and have been listening to it often. It's sweet, floaty, and upbeat, and you like her voice because there's something soft and unpolished about it. You think she's an indie artist— it sounds like maybe she'd produced the sound herself. But the lyrics….

You'd smiled the first time you listened to them, perking as she sang, 'question your tattoos,' because you'd immediately thought of Eddie. But when you'd gotten to the chorus, you'd flushed and giggled, pressing cool palms to your heated cheeks, trying to ignore the curious glances from the other passengers on the subway. You couldn't help but think of Eddie again: his wild curls, bright brown eyes, and manic grin. That word had already floated up when you looked at him— pretty— so when Quinnie sang, 'He's so pretty when he goes down on me,' well… you couldn't help yourself.

You'd been debating whether to send it to Eddie, wondering whether he'd think the song was weird or awkward. But tonight, there's something different about you. Something new has emerged at the bottom of you, and though you don't consciously know it, it emboldens you. It guides your fingers to copy the link; it sprouts against the letters as you tap out your message. 'There's a line in this song that reminds me of you,' you write. And then, before those familiar nerves can freeze you, you send it.

You stare at the message, chewing on your thumbnail as you're struck suddenly with doubt. There are any number of lines Eddie could think you're talking about— the 'tattoo' line or the 'pretty' line, which you'd been intending. But what if he thinks I'd been thinking of the bridge? 'You took my breath away, so now I can't suck in my stomach around you anymore… Do you wanna wake up to me every morning…?'  

That's a little more… vulnerable than you'd been intending. And you hadn't even meant that part of the song. Why would you tell Eddie you want to wake up with him when you're waking up next to Steve? This was a mistake.  

Eddie hasn't seen it yet, so maybe you can—

Your chest pangs immediately with panic as the blue checkmark appears. You suppress a dismayed whimper. Why'd I waste so much time deliberating?!

You know there's no way you'll be able to go back to sleep now that you're waiting for Eddie to give his feedback on the song. When the bubble appears to show he's typing, your heart leaps into your throat. You scrunch your eyes closed, fingers nearly quivering around your phone as you wait. And then, when it buzzes once in your grip, you crack one eyelid, face contorted in a wince as you peek tentatively at the screen.

It's a short message; they typically are. But where Eddie normally would explain his score, tonight, there is no explanation. There is simply a row of six skulls out of five.

You blink, both eyes opening as you examine the screen. Six skulls out of five. That's… obviously good, right? You purse your lips, attempting to interpret why he'd chosen a skull emoji. 'I'm sorry,' you type, 'did I kill you with that one?'

There's the briefest pause after you send it, and his reply appears shortly afterward. You can almost hear Eddie's smoky voice murmuring in your ear as you read it: 'Nearly, sweet girl. A mortal wound. But, worry not: I will recover.'

'Good,' you reply, following it with two smiley faces. 

And the smile that grows on your own face is verdant. Your cheeks are supple and pink. Your skin glows.

You're just beginning to flourish.

There is love

Burning to find you

Will you wait for me?

My Curse— Killswitch Engage

All day Friday, powdery-sweet Chrissy is on your mind as you labor through the shift from perdition. It's like the cosmos had overheard her question about crazy patient stories and generously decided to provide new conversation topics. You've been screamed at, berated, exasperated, and drawn so thin you spend the car ride decompressing in rare silence without your typical Spotify playlist. When you'd finally arrived home, the draw of sweatpants and nostalgia had proven too much to resist. You'd promptly cocooned on the loveseat in thick socks and a knitted blanket, retreating into Breath of the Wild for the umpteenth time. The buzz of your phone on the armrest runs up your elbow, but you're too absorbed to answer until the buzzing starts again, too insistent to ignore.

You glance to see it's Steve calling; you swipe and put him on speaker without pausing your game. "Hey," you answer, voice fond but somewhat distracted.

"Hey, babe." Steve sounds like he's in a wind tunnel. He must be driving. "What are you doin'?"

"Nothing," you answer absently, eyes still trained on the soft pastels of Kakariko Village until he says, 

"Well, I'll be home in forty, so start getting ready."

You frown in confusion, glancing at the contact picture on your phone screen: you and Steve at an NBA game, his anniversary present to you last year. "Ready for what?"

The smile in Steve's voice is audible. "Chrissy called. We're going to Insa tonight." 

You instantly straighten from your comfortable slouch, Switch abandoned beside you as you fumble up the phone. "Really?!"

"Yup." You can hear the happiness in his laugh as you squeal, tearing the blanket from your body and bolting for the bedroom. "She got us a private room for an hour."

You make another little joyful sound, hand already tugging at the shower knob, words spilling like a rush. "Yay! Okay, I'm getting ready, bye!"

"Love you," you hear Steve say.

"Love you!" You drop the phone onto the counter, hips wiggling as you wait for the water to warm. This is even more appealing than spending a night in with your favorite comfort game. You love music and singing, but traditional karaoke bars make you nervous— all those strangers staring at you on stage under the glare of the lights makes you instantly freeze. But Insa is a Korean karaoke bar, and since Chrissy has booked you a private room, it means it'll just be you and Steve, your two friends, and all the soju or sake you can drink. Here you were, thinking about Chrissy all day, and now it feels like you'd unintentionally manifested her invitation. Maybe the cosmos is trying to make amends.

  You decide that must be so as you choose your clothes: slouchy cardigan over tank top, tight black skirt almost obscenely short, sheer black tights to make up for it, white socks peeking just above Chelsea boots. You're still working on makeup when you hear a creak of the door and the jangle of keys to signal Steve's arrival. 

"I'm almost ready," you call, swiping mascara onto your top lashes. 

You hear him call back in acknowledgment, finishing the rest of your makeup with haste before fluffing out your hair and joining him near the door. 

He's still wearing his winter coat, unzipped to reveal dark jeans and an untucked button-up, his go-to for casual Fridays at the bank. His brown waves are a little windswept as he turns to you, and it matches the roguish sparkle in his eye as he takes you in. "Hey," Steve says, voice low and tinged with heat as you approach him.

"Hi," you answer happily, letting him pull you in for a kiss before you reach for your puffer jacket.

Steve's hand snakes back to your ass, drawing you against him as you tug one arm of your jacket on; you chuckle against his lips, protesting lightly, "Steve, we're gonna be late!" 

"Just wanna steal a minute to kiss my girl," Steve murmurs, and you can’t resist melting as he kisses you again, surrounding you in that familiar citrus cologne. You sneak your other arm underneath his coat to hug him, jacket half hanging off like you're trying to wear his and yours at once. The brush of Steve's tongue against the seam of your lips complements the heat— heat where the jackets drape around your body, heat where his palm grabs your ass, heat in the pit of your belly as his tongue meets yours.

Even without the radiator or your knitted blanket, Steve makes sure you're thoroughly and wonderfully warm before you venture out together into the cold night.

-

Luckily, on-time subway transfers and two powerwalked blocks later have you arriving at Insa with minutes to spare despite your short dalliance. You wander around clumps of people outside until Steve spots your friends near the wooden arch above the building's entrance. Seeing Chrissy's blonde ponytail fills you with effusive eagerness, and when her blue eyes meet yours, your broad smile is echoed on her lips. 

"Hi!" you greet her, arms opening for her tight embrace. "Thanks for inviting us!" 

"Of course!" Chrissy squeezes you affectionately tighter before she releases you to hug Steve. 

Leather creaks as Eddie moves closer, and you can feel his jacket seep cold even through your puffer jacket when you hug him, though his neck is warm as you graze it with your cheek. "Don't you have a better jacket than this?" you ask, running your fingers against the leather at his elbow.

You drop your hand, looking up into dark and twinkling eyes as Eddie replies, "Worried about me, sweetheart?" He smirks, a little crooked thing, and those full pink lips— their sudden phantom press against your own— make color prickle your cheeks. "Don't need one. My blood runs extra-hot." 

You hope your doubtful expression speaks for you and your sudden flush looks like it's from the cold. Judging by the glint in Eddie’s eyes, he’s not buying it.

"Come on, I'm freezing my balls off out here," Steve says, slinging an arm around your shoulders and hastening the four of you inside. 

"Certainly don't want that," you joke, pleased when Steve slants a grin at you as you're ushered to your room.

Inside is one long modular u-shaped couch against the back wall, a small coffee table, and two televisions: one against the front wall and one behind the couch so you can face your companions. Insa is one of the more technologically advanced karaoke restaurants: there’s an iPad for ordering drinks and a dedicated kiosk near the television to select songs. Coupled with its superior aesthetics— rich purple and turquoise mood lighting that avoids the tackiness of other bars— Insa boasts some of the largest crowds in the city, which makes it all the more exciting that Chrissy has surprised you and Steve with this outing tonight.

You shed your coats and watch Chrissy flounce over to the kiosk eagerly before the rest of you have even sat down. She's wearing a babydoll dress— one of those nearly shapeless ones that seem effortlessly chic on the right kind of person. With your curves, you think you'd probably look like you're wearing a potato sack if you attempted it, but you admire how it hangs beautifully on Chrissy. She looks like a cute little sugar-plum fairy as she scrolls through the offerings. 

"I guess Chris is going first," Eddie jokes, sprawling out in one corner of the couch with his dark legs spread, arm thrown against the back like he owns the place. He's in a long-sleeved muscle shirt in charcoal gray, accented by his signature flashes of silver— rings, wallet chain, and earrings that gleam in the neon light. Does he ever wear anything in color? Your eyes sweep him over as you sit, close but not quite sandwiched between him and Steve. Probably not, you think wryly, darting a quick glance at his profile as he grins cheekily at Chrissy when she glares at him.

"Not all of us get to be on stage every week, Mr. Rockstar," she reminds him sassily, plucking a microphone from the lower shelf on the kiosk and planting her feet in the middle of the open floor, hands on her hips. You can clearly see the cheerleading influence in her stance and expression, which is set in a confident mask of gleaming teeth and arched brows. A raucous female laugh begins her song choice, and Chrissy snaps the mic to her mouth to sing the first words: "Yeah, I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want—"

Chrissy owns Wannabe by The Spice Girls as she struts around, flicking her fingers and swinging her wavy ponytail as she exudes attitude. "I won't be hasty; I'll give you a try," she sings, cocking a shoulder as she smolders, "If you really bug me, then I'll say goodbye—" Her voice is a little pitchy, but what she lacks in technique she certainly makes up for in confidence. Chrissy pivots around to face backward for the final chorus, swaying her hips until she hits the last line where she shoots you all a foxy look over her shoulder, cocking the mic to sing, "If you wanna be my lover."

As soon as the music fades, you're clapping wildly, cheering as she spins to face the couch with a broad, sparkling smile. "You did so good! You're, like, a natural," you say, looking up at her as she prances over, skirt billowing. 

"Thanks, y/n! I guess I still got it, huh?" she adds, looking to the men for confirmation.

"I'd say so," Steve answers. "I remember, when I was a senior on the basketball team, Chrissy was one of the best flyers on the squad. It was crazy how much air she'd get!"

You watch Chrissy's eyes sparkle as he acknowledges her skill. Eddie reaches out, pinching the edge of her dress and tugging playfully as he adds, "And she was head of the squad her senior year. Lead them to regionals with her own routine and everything."

You smile up at her again, though it shifts with surprise as she pulls you to your feet with startling strength for such a slight person. "You should go next," she says, squeezing your fingers, expression earnest. "Come on, you can do it! It doesn't matter how you sound; it's all about having fun!"

From someone else, the statement may have felt like a veiled insult. But Chrissy doesn't seem to have a mean bone in her body, so you realize she's just trying to be encouraging. "Okay," you say, a little shy with the exuberance of her glee. You swap places and take the mic, lips pursing as you peruse the options at the kiosk. 

Behind you, you hear Steve say, "She's actually a really good singer." You feel a flattered smile bloom at the praise as you choose one of your favorites to sing during karaoke: If I Ain't Got You by Alicia Keys. 

As you drift toward the middle of the space and the piano introduction begins, you see Chrissy squeeze Steve's arm, thin brows crinkled up sentimentally. "Aw, that's so sweet of you, Steve!"

For a moment, Steve looks perplexed at the comment, and you think maybe Chrissy believes he's just saying that to be nice. But you're not worried about it; you're not thinking about much of anything other than what you're about to sing. Still, you’re always most nervous for the first song of the night, so as you face your audience of three, their expectant stares threaten to make that familiar anxiety begin to frost in your chest. Thankfully, you know what to do in this situation: you simply close your eyes, letting the music wash over you before you begin to sing.

"Some people live for the fortune. Some people live just for the fame."

Your voice is pitched naturally lower than Chrissy's and has a bit of rasp, but it's smooth and practiced from years of singing in chorale in school. Yet it isn't a performance, not really, because it's not about that. You stand still, aside from a subtle instinctual sway, unconcerned about moving around for your audience. You're only interested in borrowing Alicia's words, letting them bloom out of you as if they're your own in a way your words sometimes can't when you try to speak. Once you hit the chorus, a smile kisses the corners of your lips as you feel the emotion in the song, channeling the sentiment: "Some people want it all, but I don't want nothing at all if it ain't you, baby; if I ain't got you, baby—"

Alicia is an incredible vocalist; you don't try to imitate her. You simplify the vocal runs later in the song, letting yourself improvise what feels good instead. And throughout it all, you keep your eyes closed, singing with a peaceful smile until that tinkling piano returns at the end to signal the song's conclusion.

There's a brief silence where you hang suspended in the moment, eyes still closed. And then it's broken by a swirl of spoken smoke.

"Shit." The exclamation isn't loud, but it cuts through the room nonetheless as you open your eyes and smile shyly. Your face flushes as Steve whistles with his fingers; beside him, Chrissy's eyes are wide, dainty fingers clasped as she pops up. 

Chrissy wraps her arm around yours and squeezes you close. "Wow! Steve, you really weren't kidding!" You're hit with a puff of expensive perfume as she clings to you, and her billowing skirt brushes against your tights while she sways you back and forth. "Let's do couples next," she suggests, pulling back to meet your eyes. "Is it okay if Eddie and I go first?"

"Sure," you reply easily, sitting between Steve and Eddie again as she heads to the kiosk. Immediately, Steve leans in, lightly knocking your shoulder with his.

"That's my girl," Steve says, hazel eyes shining with affection, broad palm landing on your knee and squeezing lightly. Appreciative, you kiss him on the cheek, stubble like fine sandpaper against your lips. His smile widens as he pats your knee, saying more briskly, "I'm gonna need to get at least one drink in me before I join you on the next song, babe." 

You watch him scroll through the menu on the iPad for a moment until a light brush against the small of your back has you turning to meet wide brown eyes.

Eddie is no longer slouched in the corner of the couch; instead, he's curved forward, left elbow braced on his knee as if poised to get up, though he seems to have no intention to do so as he leans toward you. "You are really good," he says sincerely. "I was pleasantly surprised."

Your nose wrinkles faintly, somewhat amused and at the edge of offense. "Pleasantly surprised?" A hint of a challenge tinges your voice as you add, "What, did you think I would be bad?"

Eddie's face falls as he stumbles. "I—" His eyes dart away, reminding you of the day you'd met— when, at the ice cream shop, you'd seen that pink on his typical black and white. The idea that it may happen again excites you, and you aren't quite sure why.

But Eddie doesn't turn pink; instead, he huffs a chuckle, slanting a glance back at you as his eyes glitter. "Well, I wouldn't say that."

It's obvious that he's teasing you, so you feign annoyance. "Well, you'd better look out because I might take your place and become frontwoman of Corroded Coffin if you keep talking smack." 

You try valiantly to maintain your pretend annoyance, but it's really quite hard when Eddie grins so manically, brown eyes eager as they flick you over. "I'd like to see that, sweetheart," he replies, and it's not sarcastic at all— in fact, he sounds eager, as if the idea excites him. And you realize, as his fingers twitch against your cardigan, that Eddie hasn't yet taken his hand off the small of your back. 

That pink that you'd been hoping for on Eddie's face colors your cheeks instead as he stares at you intently, and his manic smile tightens to a smirk when he notices. A flutter of wings trembles low when his gaze dips to your lips, and your tongue darts out to wet them just as Chrissy calls across the room, 

"Okay, Eddie, get up here! I picked the song."

The drag of his fingers against your back leaves you with a shiver when Eddie rises, stuffing his hands in his back pockets as he lopes over to Chrissy. As he surveys her choice, the door opens to reveal a server with a green bottle and four shot glasses. 

As she sets the tray on the coffee table, Steve immediately reaches for it, calling to the others; Eddie turns, swaying wild curls haloed by neon light. "C'mon, Chris," he says, nodding over. "I'm gonna need a fuckin' drink for this one."

The sardonic tinge to Eddie's voice intrigues you, and you wonder what song Chrissy has chosen as Steve passes you a glass of soju. You all drink together, and the alcohol is ice cold as it slides down your throat, settling into a comfortable burn in your belly. It lingers sweet on your teeth as Chrissy grabs Eddie's hand to pull him into their performance.

Eddie shifts his weight as he cracks his neck to the side, saying dryly, "Just warning you, I haven't warmed up my falsetto, so—"

Chrissy scoffs fondly. "Oh, come on, Eddie. You always sound good." 

"All right," he concedes, a little self-deprecating grin spreading as the music begins— jaunty bass and a jazzy piano that you'd recognize anywhere. Chrissy has chosen You're The One That I Want from Grease.

Despite his reticence, Eddie gamely gives the song his all. Though at first, his falsetto makes you want to giggle, you hold back, not wanting him to think you're laughing at him when he'd already seemed unsure about it. You soon find yourself smiling widely as they play off each other for the second bridge: "I'd better shape up cause you need a man—" Eddie begins, dark eyes locked on Chrissy as she takes over, drawing her hand down his chest. "I need a man who can keep me satisfied." 

Steve nudges another shot of soju into your hand. "Cheers, babe," he murmurs, warm breath ghosting your face before you both take your second shots. It slides down cold and burns in your belly again, but when it's followed by the quick, eager press of Steve's lips against yours, the burn is accompanied by a slight tingle. 

You break away to applaud as the song ends, watching as Eddie leans close to kiss Chrissy. Her hand finds his cheek when he begins to draw back, and when she presses forward for another kiss, you hear Steve whistle again, though this time it's a teasing, flirty two-tone that makes Chrissy break from the kiss to giggle. Eddie hugs Chrissy from behind, walking with her as they come over to the couch, and you see it again— the gentleness in those brown eyes, the softness in the way his pink lips tilt in a small smile when she sing-songs, "Your turn!" 

Steve’s hand finds yours, guiding you to the kiosk. "What do you wanna sing?"

You don't really care what song you and Steve sing right now— you're just content to be here with him and Eddie and Chrissy, surrounded by affection and music. "Whatever you want, babe." 

His smile widens at your reply, and he lazily drags his finger across the screen. "How about this one?" 

Fondness fills you as you see his suggestion is from Dirty Dancing. It's a sentimental movie for you both— you'd watched it the first time you'd spent the night at Steve's old apartment instead of going out. And while eating Chinese food on Steve's couch and cuddling in your lounge clothes seems so commonplace, that was what you'd valued about it: that it was casual, that it felt normal. That it seemed like the beginning of an intimate closeness that didn't require dressing up or fancy restaurants or showy gestures.

"Yeah," you agree softly. "I love that song."

You nearly forget you have an audience as you sing The Time of My Life with Steve, giggling at his characteristically loud, brassy voice. Steve never holds back at karaoke, though he is— by far— the worst singer of you four. But you couldn't care less as he sings to you, "I've been waiting for so long, now I finally found someone to stand by me." And you know Steve doesn't care how he sounds either, eyes locked on you while you sing to him, "With my body and soul, I want you more than you'll ever know." When the instrumental breakdown occurs, Steve grabs your hand, spinning you, strong arms lowering you into a dip that makes you squeal and laugh with delight before he brings you back up.

When it’s time for the final chorus, you give it your all, hopping as you throw your arm wide and sing with abandon. When the song fades out, Stever snatches you up as you laugh, lifting you briefly from your feet to kiss you before setting you quickly back down. 

"You guys are just so cute!" Chrissy beams at you, sweet and powdery soft as she leans against Eddie's side. You hold out a hand to them, eyes sparkling.

"Get up here, you two," you say, excitement dancing like sparks across your skin. "We have forty minutes left, and I don't wanna waste a second."

You sing several songs as a group, all crowded around the kiosk to decide on your selections. You each have wildly different tastes in music, so there's quite a bit of friendly bickering as you negotiate what to sing together. Still, with the shots flowing and the joy of shared experience, you delight in even that aspect of the process. After a number of group selections, Steve and Eddie shoo you girls off to the couch so that they can, as they say, 'serenade you.'

"Oh, God," you mutter good-naturedly, leaning comfortably against Chrissy as the guys huddle close to conspire. "What are we in for now?"

Apparently something entirely unexpected as the guys stand side-by-side, stone-faced while a guitar plucks along. Their faces remain serious even as Eddie croons, "Yeah…" in the most exaggeratedly whiny boy-band voice you've ever heard. You can't stifle an incredulous snort as you and Chrissy exchange glances, eyes wide as your lips twitch. Your eyes snap to your boyfriend as Steve sings loudly, "You are my fire, the one desire…."

You manage to hold your composure until Eddie whines, tossing his long curls dramatically, "But we—"  

You're cackling before he can even hit the next line, and for a split second, his composure wavers, a chuckle breaking through as he continues, "...are two worlds apart… can't reach to your heart—" 

The sight of Steve— the straight-laced banker in a collared button-up, all citrus and sea salt— and Eddie— the hardcore musician in combat boots and chains, all smoke and ink— singing I Want It That Way by the Backstreet Boys as a pretend-earnest duet is too much for you and Chrissy to take. As soon as the chorus starts, you both flush bright red with laughter, clinging to each other in utter hysterics. Once the song ends, all you can do is curl over into Chrissy's lap, burying your face in gauzy fabric as she collapses onto your back. Your reactions urge each other on until you're hysterical for long enough that Steve exclaims, "Jesus Christ, was it really that funny?"

You hear Eddie snipe, "You both are real fuckin' rude, you know." Your head pops up to see him swaggering around, gesturing widely and theatrically as he grouses, "Here we are, trying to sing about our undying love for you, and you have the gall—" he pauses dramatically, "the audacity— to laugh at us." He turns to Steve, arms crossed, head shaking like a scolding parent. "These girls don't deserve us, Harrington."

"You're right, Munson. Maybe we should find us a new pair of girls who appreciate real culture."

You and Chrissy straighten, exchanging looks of deep indignance as your boyfriends smirk at you. "We'll show you culture," she sniffs, shoulder brushing Eddie's as she pushes by him with you in tow. He and Steve chuckle to themselves, falling back onto the couch as you and Chrissy lean close to assess your options. You find yourself relishing this dynamic— allied with Chrissy against the two guys, conspiring to choose the best song to annoy them. You're giddy with feminine closeness as Chrissy whispers in your ear, though as you notice one particular song, you grab Chrissy's fingers to halt her scrolling.

"That one!" you say, voice hushed but urgent. You turn to her, eyes bright. "That's the one."

She purses her lips, brow crinkling. "Really?"

"Yes," you say firmly. Whereas usually, you would defer to her preference, your desire to provoke the guys has lit you inside, made you bold.

Chrissy must see your determination because she concedes quickly with a little shrug. "Okay."

You grin widely, victory and sweet revenge buzzing in your blood as you grab your microphone; Steve and Eddie’s conversation wanes as they see you standing before them. When you feel Chrissy's dress brush against your thigh, you tip your chin, smirking as you murmur with false sincerity, "We've chosen this song specifically for the country music fans in the audience."

In your peripheral, you see Steve's face crease in confusion, but your eyes are locked on black and white. You buzz with pleasure as Eddie cocks a brow at you, spreading his dark legs to settle into the couch corner, hint of a smirk growing on his lips. Those brown eyes are wide and dark as they hold yours, glittering with approval at the challenge in your stare. 

Your voice is pitched as close to sultry as you ever get as you finish your introduction: "We hope you thoroughly enjoy this."

You never perform when you sing, not really, but now, suddenly, you are. "Right now, he's probably slow-dancing with a bleach-blonde tramp, and she's probably gettin' frisky," you rasp, channeling the drama of Carrie Underwood's delivery. Chrissy sings the next line, high voice also loaded with attitude, and you alternate the verses and sing the choruses together. You play up the growl in your voice as you smolder, any self-consciousness forgotten, "Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats."

As you sing for Steve and Eddie, you suddenly understand the appeal of performance and why Chrissy's face became so luminous after she'd sung Wannabe . Their attention wraps around you, coiling into your blood, coaxing you to rock your hips and shoulders as you sing to them. It's intoxicating, the heat of their stares as you and Chrissy sway together, bodies brushing as they watch you; there's power in it, power that you've just barely tasted. 

And you know, as your gaze flits back and forth between both men, that you want more.

When the song ends, their approval is instant, pretend contentiousness forgotten now. After lavishing you in whistles and applause with Eddie, Steve notes, "We've got enough time for a couple more songs."

"All right," Eddie says decisively, slapping his thighs as he stands. "I'm going."

A flutter of moth's wings begins low at the idea of hearing his smoky voice again— not him singing a song from Grease or the Backstreet Boys, but something that echoes his performance the first time you'd heard him on stage. When, before you'd even known him, his voice had reached inside you, tugging at something that has only just begun to take root in newfound light.

You nestle snug between Chrissy and Steve as you wait for Eddie's song, knee nearly bouncing with anticipation. Impulsively, you take a cheeky swig from the soju bottle, shrugging as Steve shoots you an amused look. The soju isn't as pleasantly cold anymore, but the burn still spreads from your belly, coaxing out a little hazy smile as Eddie returns to the center of the room. You wonder what song he's chosen, thighs pressing together as you imagine harsh guitars or driving drums, as you remember the black and white of his torso on stage at the bar, ink now sadly hidden behind charcoal long sleeves.

You should have known by the mischievous twinkle in those dark eyes what was coming. But when a smooth R&B beat begins, you blink, clouded mind instantly befuddled. Eddie's voice is still that smoky husk, though it's intentionally exaggerated as he drags out the word, "Baby…" You remain perplexed until he sings the next line: "I'm hot, just like an oven. I need some lovin'..." 

Eddie's rendition of Sexual Healing seems to hover somewhere between his real performance at the bar and his joke performance of I Want It That Way. But when he starts slowly thrusting his hips, running one hand sensually across his chest and up his neck, it becomes abundantly clear that he's fucking around. 

Chrissy wrinkles her nose at his exaggerated movements— body rolling, hips twitching with little jerks as his lips curl with amusement. "Ugh, Eddie," she whines, "this is so cringy!" 

And you know what she means— it is cringy, and everyone knows it. But you can't help but utterly delight in the two sides of Eddie Munson that seem to alternate in little glimpses: confident, self-possessed, sharp, and wolfish, but also awkward, goofy, unafraid to be exactly how he wants to be even in the face of others' judgment. And you know Chrissy isn't judging him, not really, but you think even if she was, he wouldn't care at all.

As you watch Eddie gyrate, eyes wide and grin manic, you feel something start to build inside you— a desire to join in his revelry, in this uninhibited display of enjoyment that disregards the opinions of others.

And with your eyes on Eddie's black and white, you act on that desire. 

You pop up from the couch just in time for the music to swell; he holds the mic out toward you when he sees you coming so you can both sing, "Whenever blue teardrops are fallin'…."

Together you turn to face Chrissy and Steve, smiles wide as you sway, arms wrapping comfortably around each other's waists. You extend your hand toward the others, coaxing them with wagging brows and little shimmies of your shoulders to try to get them to join you. "The love you give to me will free me," you and Eddie sing, sides pressed together, hips bumping as you move out of rhythm. Steve eyes you skeptically as you urge him with your extended hand, but he can't keep the curve off his lips for long as you stage-whisper, "Get up, get up, get up, get up," like it's a message directed to him. Steve sighs heavily, smile springing free as he joins on your other side, wrapping his arm around your back atop Eddies. You barely stave off your giggle as you all start to sway back and forth. 

You do laugh when Steve and Eddie squish you between them to try to both reach the mic. Steve attempts to convince Chrissy to join you, who's still watching you all reluctantly, though you can tell by the look in those blue eyes that she's close to cracking. 

"Come on, Chris," Steve wheedles, and finally, she relents, smile spreading on her bow lips as she skirts around the coffee table, huddling close to sing, " Come take control, just grab ahold of my body and mind—" 

Uninhibited joy floods you entirely as the four of you sing together, all pressed close, faces shining with bright smiles and laughs as Chrissy finally gives in, committing to the cheesiness of this song. When it ends, Steve and Eddie wrap their arms around you both, squishing you together as you and she shriek and giggle. Still pressed tight, you all shuffle dizzily toward the kiosk to choose your final song.

You lean closer, dragging them all with you as you see Mamma Mia on the list. "Steve loves ABBA!" 

"You would love ABBA, dude," Eddie teases, and Steve reaches around you to shove him playfully. 

"Shut up," he grouses, though you predict trouble as his lips go tight against a smirk. "I could tell them about your guilty pleasure music, Munson—" 

Intrigue blooms as Eddie looks instantly horrified. "ABBA it is," he relents quickly, jabbing the selection to start the music and, you suspect, to avoid any follow-up questions.

Mamma Mia turns out to be the perfect song to end with as even Eddie, who'd implied his disdain by teasing Steve, seems to enjoy it. "Yes, I've been broken-hearted, blue since the day we parted," you all belt together, and when you glance at Eddie to see him smiling widely with dimpled cheeks and little scrunched lines at the edges of his warm brown eyes, it strikes you, for the first time, just how downright pretty he is. When those brown eyes catch yours, you don't look away from him, drawn in as the song concludes:

"Mamma mia, now I really know— my my, I could never let you go!"

And with that, your time at Insa comes to a close— but the night is far from over.

-

Inviting Eddie and Chrissy back to the apartment is inevitable, and you smile as Eddie opens the back passenger door of his van for you. "Comfy?" He grins, pulling the seatbelt down to press into your hand. "Buckle up," he says, voice warm and teasing as you giggle. 

"You may think he's kidding," Chrissy says, sweet voice floating back to you from the front seat as Eddie closes your door. "But Eddie is probably the worst driver I've ever met, so… I'd make sure you heed his advice."

When Eddie practically throws himself into the driver's seat, hand jerking the gearshift into reverse as he peeks back over his shoulder, the wicked mischievousness in those brown eyes has you scrambling for Steve's hand to hold tight. "I'm not the worst driver," Eddie says lightly, eyes glinting as he adds, "but I am the craziest."

Despite Eddie's ominous teasing, you make it back to your apartment happy and in one piece. In fact, you're practically effusive from the alcohol and leftover merriment despite how you stumble trying to toe off your boots on the welcome mat. Your loveseat is still littered with the remains of your planned night in— fuzzy socks and knitted blanket strewn across the cushions, Switch balanced on the arm. You gather your items as your boyfriend and guests shed their coats and shoes. Once the socks have been tossed in your hamper and the Switch returned to its ottoman, you reenter the living room with your folded blanket to see Steve and Eddie seated together on the big couch. 

Chrissy pulls the knit from your hands, draping it over the loveseat with impatience.

"What?" you say, perplexed as she pulls you along with purpose, but all becomes clear as she releases your hand to run her fingers lightly down your cardigan instead, smiling coquettishly.

"Let's give the boys a little show again," Chrissy suggests, hand trailing up your sheer black tights, fingertips skimming your thigh as you glance at the couch. And you see that heated look again in brown and hazel— the one they'd worn as you and Chrissy performed Before He Cheats . Heat that coils into you, that echoes the comfortable fuzz in your head from the soju; heat that reminds you of the power you'd discovered, the taste you'd wanted more of. 

You palm Chrissy's waist, crinkling the shapeless fabric against her lithe body as you slant an alluring glance at Steve and Eddie. "Yes," you murmur, "let's." Your smile stretches as you watch them shift against the couch— legs widening, palms rubbing on knees, heads falling back to observe the show.

Caught in the hypnotic power of their masculine gazes, you and Chrissy undress each other, peeking glances at your men as you reveal skin little by little. She slides your cardigan from your shoulders, air cold against your bare arms as you lift her dress to tease a glimpse of her panties before letting it fall again, giggling with her as the men huff their impatience. 

Gradually, Chrissy sheds each article of clothing from your body: your tank top to reveal your midnight blue bra, your tight black skirt— which nearly gets stuck on your ass, which would have been embarrassing if you hadn't noticed how both Eddie and Steve's eyes were wide and rapt as it finally bounced free— and your white socks. Finally, she peels your sheer black tights down your legs, revealing a matching set of cheeky midnight blue panties cut high on your hips. You run your hands along her clothed waist again as Chrissy smiles at you with pink bow lips, eyes meeting. You know what her expression means because you're feeling it too: the heady desire practically palpable in the air as it rolls off your boyfriends. The sensual feminine control you have over them in this moment, made more potent together.

Chrissy is wearing much less clothing than you, so you gently lift her dress over her head last, revealing a set of aggressively strappy black lingerie. She runs her hand over your bare waist to settle on the small of your back, and your hand settles on her hip, fingers resting against the thin strap of her thong. Together, you turn to face the couch, bodies on display for devouring gazes.

And devour they do— they no longer lean back against the couch, feigning nonchalance. No, Steve and Eddie are so clearly wound tight by your mutual display, eyes dark and gleaming as you both draw closer. 

You and Chrissy have a choice now: begin the night by approaching your own boyfriends, comfortable and safe; or, perhaps, decide to approach the other man on the couch, whose touch is still unfamiliar and thus tempting. As you glance between them— first at the roguish swoop of Steve's bangs over hungry hazel, the look on his face one you've seen many times before, and then to the wildness of Eddie's long disheveled curls, brown eyes darkened like ink, the look on his face one that makes you flutter with nerves— you realize that your emerging boldness isn't yet enough to steer you away from the comfort of Steve's arms.

You gently pull from Chrissy, eyes fixed on the buttons of Steve's shirt. As soon as you get close enough, his hands attach to your hips, warm and broad and not at all timid as he pulls you onto his lap. You settle, humming as he kneads the flesh of your ass. As his lips find the sensitive spot underneath your jaw, your eyes slip closed to work the buttons of his shirt open by feel. The couch dips to your right as Chrissy mirrors you on Eddie's lap, and you sneak a tiny peek at what they're doing. You see Eddie's thumb drag her bottom lip down as her hands dip to the hem of his muscle shirt. "Mmm," you hum again, breathy and quiet, as Steve sucks lightly on your neck, fingers moving faster to pop his buttons so you can feel the press of his skin against yours. 

As soon as you get the last button free, you pull away from Steve's mouth, dragging the fabric down his shoulders, revealing a dense cloud of hair on his chest. It's soft like fur under your fingers as you stroke him— your favorite thing to do when Steve's shirt is first removed— and you get just a glimpse of hazel nearly swallowed by black pupils before Steve's mouth claims yours.

Your fingers continue to drag through the hair on his chest as Steve cradles you close with solid arms, tongue dipping wet and insistent into your mouth. It's a novel experience to be making out on the couch next to another half-naked couple like this. You find with the doubled sounds blending together— the soft smack of lips, the subtleness of deepened breaths, the masculine rumble of low groans, the high, breathy moans to compliment them— that when the throb starts within you, it intensifies quickly, burning in your belly, building insistent need that demands to be sated.

Steve pulls you closer by your ass, the motion dragging your panties against his jeans, catching your clit just right to throw kindling on the burn. When his hands palm your breasts over your bra, your fingers find the buckle of his belt, tugging at it until it jangles loose and you can pull down his zipper. Steve leaves your mouth to press blistering kisses along your jaw; you lift your hips, and he dips lower on your neck to reach his pants, shimmying them down his legs until he can kick them off into a haphazard pile.

You sigh as Steve mouths at your neck, tangling your fingers in the thick waves of his brown hair when he starts to suck a mark, the sting adding to your kindling. And as you tilt your head back to give him more access, you hear it— quiet murmuring, a delicate voice pitched thick and sultry beside you.

"Am I your bad girl, Eddie?"

Your eyes pop open as surprise rushes, and you can't help but dart a quick glance at the couple beside you: sweet Chrissy with her powdery-soft eyes and saccharine smiles, face flushed as Eddie's plush lips drag against her throat when he murmurs back, "You know you are, baby."

Chrissy hums in pleasure, and you suck in a quick breath as you see Eddie's pink tongue dart out to lick at her skin, the sight conjuring the phantom brush against your own throat— wet and warm opposite Steve's sucking lips. You stifle a whimper as you burn hotter between your legs, hips shifting against Steve's lap as he sucks your neck more aggressively. And then Chrissy talks again, still quiet, but yet more shocking:

"I'm just a dirty little slut for you—"

Steve's lips suddenly pop from your neck, and you sway as his nose abruptly drags against your throat when he turns to look. "Damn, Chrissy," he rasps, sounding almost as surprised as you feel. "You've really got a mouth on you, huh?"

Chrissy's blue eyes widen, her gaze darting from you to Steve as she shrinks slightly in Eddie's arms, suddenly bashful. "No, no," Steve assures her, "it's a good thing. It's hot." He pulls one arm away from your back to clasp her forearm, rubbing his thumb soothingly against her skin. When your boyfriend smiles at her, you watch Chrissy's expression soften, a tiny relieved smile curling in return. "No need to be shy," he murmurs, soft and kind, and as you look at his profile— alkaline nose, stubble dusting his jaw, thick dark brows tugged up in an earnest expression of reassurance— you feel a sudden rush of fond affection for Steve Harrington. 

You glance at Chrissy again, smiling encouragingly when she meets your eyes before looking back at Steve. And you notice that Steve hasn't drawn his hand from Chrissy's arm, and Chrissy's gaze is running over Steve's face, and if they're looking at each other, then, well, that leaves you free to search for that pair of beautiful brown eyes.

And you find them— your heart thumps as you look at Eddie to see him already staring back at you, intent on your face. You feel that flutter of wings kick up as your gaze roves over him, heart beating faster at the sight of that dark body armor exposed again, so stark on the pale quartz of his arms and chest. 

Instantly, you need the press of Eddie's inked skin against yours.

You don't know if Eddie can see the desire in your eyes or if maybe he's just thinking the same thing as you— either way, it brings both relief and unbelievable tension when he murmurs, voice huskier than usual, "Do we wanna mix things up a bit?"

The implication is clear, and as Steve's palm drags lightly up your back, lips pressing against your temple, you look to Chrissy. 

Her face is flushed, blue eyes hazy with want as she watches Steve nuzzle against your skin; when her gaze catches yours, agreement flows between you. 

You each slip from your boyfriends' laps, exchanging soft smiles as you brush by one another to switch places. There's so much of Eddie's pale skin on display, so many dark trails of ink that weave across his chest and down his arms. Your gaze drags along them until it travels lower over his abdomen, over his soft stomach, over the trail of dark hair that leads down below checkered boxers, loose fabric obscuring what's beneath. You're willing— more than willing— but looking down into Eddie's dark eyes causes those wings to stir up, to flutter wildly with a potent mixture of anticipation, nervousness, and desire. 

Slowly, Eddie leans forward, gaze locked on your wide eyes, assessing your reaction as he draws closer. He touches you carefully; his fingertips drag lightly over your thigh, feather-light, traveling up, up, up until they brush against the lace of your panties at your hip. And when just the tip of his index finger sneaks beneath it, the touch coaxes you closer, drawing you to his ink and smoke.

When you settle on his lap, the drag of Eddie's warm arms as they close around your back makes you shiver despite their heat, lips parting as you near those brown eyes, that soft nose, that strong jaw, those full pink lips. Eddie tilts his chin up for you, an invitation, and his warm breath puffs against your lips before they finally meet again. 

Kissing Eddie is just like kissing Steve, but also nothing like it at all. His arms are firm like Steve's, and his lips are full like Steve's, and he holds you close like Steve does. But Eddie's curls brush against your neck, teasing your skin; Eddie's scent is muskier, less crisp than Steve's; and Eddie doesn't dive into your mouth like Steve does after three long years of dating. He's more polite— not quite hesitant, but careful as his lips press to yours, not deep or thorough enough to sate the want that's throbbing between your legs. And you appreciate his consideration, but you need more.

You tilt your head, fingers finding his jaw as you press closer, urging him silently to take more of you. Your arousal flutters when you pull that breathy groan again from his throat at your eagerness, and Eddie's arms tighten, pressing your breasts to his chest as he leans into you with his kiss. Your blood sings as he kisses you deeper for a while until he pulls from your mouth to duck to your neck. Eddie licks a path up your throat, slick and hot, and you tip your head to give him room, arms draping over his shoulders, fingers finally tucking into those wild curls you've been admiring from afar. 

Eddie groans quietly against your skin as his hands run over your back, calloused and rough, dragging over your shoulders and spine with a tantalizing rasp. You notice that his fingers begin to linger near the band of your bra, and you anticipate his question before it rumbles against your throat. "Can I take this off?"

Though you'd been prepared for it, as it's voiced, the question makes those wings flutter again, mixing nerves with arousal. A quick breath, the press of your fingers into curls to ground you, and then you answer. "Yes," you whisper, breathing deep as you feel him work at the clasp.

A high moan next to you has your eyes darting to the left for the first time since you'd crawled into Eddie's lap. Steve is sucking at the thin column of Chrissy's throat. You wonder briefly if it's invasive to watch them, but the thought melts as you notice Chrissy's bra is already off, and your boyfriend's broad hand is gripping her breast, fingers rolling her nipple.

Chrissy's breasts are just as delicate as the rest of her: small and perky, with little pink nipples nearly engulfed by Steve's broad fingers. So different from your breasts, different enough to make a sudden flash of insecurity prickle as they fall free from your bra, bottom-heavy.

You turn away from Chrissy, nerves sharpening when you see Eddie's gaze roving over your breasts. The instinctual desire to hide is strong, but Eddie speaks before you can. "Look at you," he hums, practically a purr as he looks up at you, eyes glittering with approval. His voice startles you, and you feel your cheeks flush as he presses you gently closer with his palm against your spine. When Eddie kisses the base of your throat, plush lips soft and warm, your nerves settle; when he nips downward, the flutters take over as you stretch your spine, angling your chest up for him.

As Eddie's lips draw closer to your nipple, you shift your hips unconsciously, body seeking to ease the ache between your legs. When he hums, hands wrapping around your hips, you realize that Eddie is very vocal— you can hear each time he responds to something you've done, and you find you enjoy having that knowledge, that confirmation. When he lifts your hips slightly so he can adjust beneath you, the groan he muffles against your skin when his hardening length presses against your pussy echoes the relief you feel inside but don't voice. He's hot through those loose boxers, firm as he drags against your heat when you shift your hips experimentally again, quietly exploring how he feels. But when his lips close around your nipple, sucking at the same time you use him to drag friction against your clit, you can't prevent the tiny whimper that escapes your lips.

Eddie switches to the other breast, presses his face closer, sucks harder, and you're pleased that he seems to have enjoyed your sound. Calloused hands meet at the small of your back, silently urging you forward; encouraged, you rock against him again. With each shift of your hips on his lap and each hot lave of his tongue against your nipples, you stoke each other's fires, clear in how you throb harder and he hardens further beneath you.

You hear Chrissy murmur again, coquettish and smooth: ""You know, Steve, I can be your little slut, too."  

You don't look, eyes closed while Eddie lavishes your breasts, but you hear your boyfriend chuckle breathlessly, husky and eager. "Yeah?" Chrissy hums, and their lips smack, soft groans and moans falling from them, washing over you. The heat in their voices— the evidence of their pleasure— adds to your own pleasure, and you move your hips more boldly against Eddie's lap as you hear it. You're enjoying how he's sucking your nipples, each brush of his tongue zinging to your pussy, but your desire suddenly shifts. You use the fingers buried in his hair to tug him lightly from you, pussy pulsing as he startles a slight groan, brown eyes snapping to yours as his pupils dilate. 

It only confirms what you'd just realized: Eddie's reactions feed you, and you're hungry for more.

You tilt his head back, ducking to kiss and suck at the edge of his jaw, mouthing at the pale quartz of his throat. You wonder what Eddie would do if you worked a bruise into his skin— would he suck in a delicious gasp of air? Would he moan, chest rumbling against your breasts? Would his hips twitch beneath you, pressing himself up into your heat? 

To experiment, you kiss him sweetly beneath his ear, stimulating the skin before taking it between your teeth, nipping gently. You feel his breath catch in his chest; his hands take firm hold of your hips for the first time, dragging you against his hard cock. 

And oh, is it so utterly satisfying when Eddie's hips press up into you, wanting you closer as you suck and nip at his throat. When he starts a slow, steady grind, pushing you down against his cock as he drags friction along your clit, both of your breaths deepen, quicken, murmuring small sounds of pleasure into each other's skin and hair. Arousal begins to tighten low in your belly, kindling finally catching fire, pussy now slick and heated.

"I need your mouth on my cunt, Steve."

You flush hotter as you hear Chrissy's words and feel Eddie's fingers tighten against your hips. The idea sits loaded between you as Steve murmurs something to Chrissy, presumably about her proposition, but you can't be bothered to listen as you feel Eddie swallow under your lips, chest pressing to your breasts with his deep breath.

Eddie's fingers find your jaw then, gently guiding you up to look into his eyes: brown burnished to warm amber, lit from within by feverish desire. Desire for you. It makes you pulse again, knees squeezing lightly against the outside of his hips.

After looking at you for a moment, Eddie draws closer, soft nose brushing your ear. "You wanna?" he husks, lips feather-light against the skin of your throat. Tantalizing smoke flows, inflating your lungs as he asks, "You want me to go down on you?"

You bite your lip as a thrill pulses through you, and you nod, frizzy curls brushing your cheek. He kisses you again underneath your ear, firmer now, seeming eager at your answer. His eagerness settles into you, and your excitement rises as Eddie kisses a path back to your lips. You cup his jaw as he reaches your mouth, opening your lips for him, tasting his tongue for the first time. 

Eddie's tongue is sweet like soju and spicy like cinnamon gum, but it mostly tastes like nothing you've tasted before— his flavor, you suppose. His tongue is firm and wet as it dips into your mouth, and you press yourself to his chest as you taste him, wanting every inch of his skin against your own, as much as you can touch. 

Beside you, Chrissy squeals as the couch suddenly shifts, and you part from Eddie's mouth in surprise at the sudden movement. You see Steve carrying her to the loveseat; lithe, pale arms wrap around his broad shoulders, ankles meeting at the waistline of his tight black boxer briefs. 

You don't want to, but you start to think about how easy it was for Steve to lift Chrissy, how he never picks you up like that—

Eddie's thumb brushes against your clothed slit, and the thought promptly sieves from your conscious mind.

You find brown eyes by instinct, a little plaintive crease forming in your brow as you look at him. Eddie's lips curl in a smile when, as he brushes you again, you gasp, and your eyes dart down to watch his hand— ruddy knuckles, gleaming silver rings that look aggressive against the dainty lace of your blue panties. You squirm slightly as he palms your thighs, fingers kneading flesh, and you see it at the same time you feel it— the overwhelming wetness of your pussy, the saturation of your panties. The wet spot on the front of his boxers, which you wish was from him but know is from you.

A hot rush of embarrassment pours down your spine as you realize you've soaked through your underwear onto his, but Eddie seems not to share your sentiment. His smile grows, eyes half-lidded and heated as he draws closer to your face. "So wet for me," Eddie praises you, breath ghosting against your lips, inky eyes glittering with approval. When his thumb brushes you again, you shift into his touch, hips pressing it more firmly against your slick heat, seeking more pressure.

A glint of teeth as his smile turns to a smirk. "Mmm," Eddie hums, voice low, husked against your lips. "Good girl."

Your breath catches, pussy clenching as he calls you that— feeling bursts low in your belly, fluttering, blooming up to your chest as you whimper for him. "Oh," Eddie murmurs, voice still quiet but curious now, as if he's discovered something. "You like that, don't you?"

Your face flushes hot, lips twisting as you shrink from a response, but Eddie takes pity on you. "Lie down on the couch for me," he says, releasing you from having to answer. 

You rearrange until you're stretched out flat on the big couch, looking beyond your breasts to the valley of your soft stomach, the curve of your thighs, watching as Eddie's fingers seek blue lace. He pauses before he removes them, on his knees and hovering above you, wild curls like a dark stormcloud around his head, patient as he waits for your permission. 

Your chest heaves with a shaky breath, and then you nod.

The air is cold against your newly-revealed skin as Eddie drags your panties from you, and you bite your lip as you feel them graze your calves. You look up at the white ceiling as his hands softly press your thighs apart, heart thumping as his curls brush your skin, pussy throbbing with the anticipation of his mouth on you—

As Eddie licks a thick stripe up your pussy, your quiet moan expresses your blissful relief.

His tongue is slick fire against your heat, wet and firm on your swollen flesh. Again, it strikes you, just like when you'd first sat on his lap, how he feels different from Steve. The thought fills you with a naughty thrill, the knowledge that you're letting another man lick your pussy while your boyfriend is sprawled out on the loveseat nearby, having given his full permission. You're allowed to enjoy this, to relish the way Eddie's broad tongue parts your folds, the way he drags that slick fire from your entrance to your clit before teasing it with little light brushes of his tongue-tip, little flicks that make your hips shift as he stokes the burn in your belly. 

That burn only increases as Eddie starts to explore you— thumbs pulling your folds apart, tongue dipping into your entrance, lips sucking lightly on your clit, tongue swirling in different patterns as if he's trying to learn you, to seek out your strongest reactions. And when he finds something that makes your thighs twitch, or your breath hitch, or your lips part with a moan or whimper, he does it again and again, a little firmer or lighter, a little faster or slower, curious like he'd been when he'd discovered you liked the way he spoke to you.

It begins to build— the tension inside you, encouraged by Eddie's eager seeking. But it's not the only thing that builds— you're suddenly reminded of what your boyfriend is doing sprawled out on the loveseat nearby when their sounds hit you like someone has turned up the dial and stripped away any filters.

You hear Chrissy first: loud feminine moaning, interrupted as she mewls, "Fuck, yeah— oh, that feels so good, Steve." 

Steve groans, the sound muffled as if against flesh. "Your pussy tastes so fuckin' amazing." 

Another moan, higher. "Oh yeah, shit, Steve— finger-fuck me hard, baby—" 

More groaning, loud and deep. "Oh, fuck—"

Though Eddie's tongue is lavishing you with pleasure, once you hear them, you can't stop the spiral of your thoughts. You're suddenly conscious that you've been mostly silent this whole time. Should I be making more noise? You remember how Chrissy had called herself a bad girl for Eddie, how he'd seemed to like it. Should I be saying things like that? You can feel it: the freeze that begins to creep, to spread along your ribs. And as Eddie keeps licking you, Steve's voice echoes in your head: 'Your pussy tastes so fucking amazing,' he'd told Chrissy. Steve has never said you taste bad or anything— he's never really said anything about your taste before. What if I don't taste as good as her? What if Eddie doesn't like the way I taste but is too nice to say anything? What if—?

When the wet heat of Eddie's tongue leaves you, it almost seems like confirmation of your spiraling thoughts— the freeze travels up your throat, brow twitching with distress until you feel the couch shift underneath his weight. And then he's there: fingers brushing back the hair at your temple, brown eyes staring calmly into your own, warm skin covering you as your thighs part to accommodate his hips. 

Eddie's voice is a soft murmur. "You're all tangled up in your head, aren't you?"

Your eyes dart between each of his as you look up at him shyly, swallowing thick against the freeze. But his warm gaze is melting it; the heat of his chest is sinking into your ribcage. You nod for him.

"Focus on me," he says, ducking his head to press his lips to yours. 

And as you breathe slowly through your nose, lips parting to allow him access, Steve and Chrissy recede. You let them fade as Eddie coaxes you back to him, tongue slick against yours, fingers stroking your cheeks and jaw and neck until you make a breathy sound against his lips and your hips shift up into his, seeking, wanting. "There she is," Eddie murmurs, approval clear in that rasp of smoke he breathes into your mouth. He pulls back, curls brushing your collarbone as he strokes your hair again. "I wanna make you feel good," he says. "Will you let me make you feel good?"

"Yes," you whisper.

Eddie hovers nearby, waiting patiently as you look into his eyes, that warm brown burnished to amber. And then you stretch your neck to kiss him. 

As soon as your mouth meets his, he leans in, lips pillow-soft and plush, sticking slightly as you pull away. You're rewarded with a crook of a smile and a smoky purr. "That's it, sweet girl."

It's like 'sweetheart,' like 'good girl,' except it's so much fucking better. Your pussy pulses, hips pressing up into him as feeling blooms in your body, sweet like a rush of rain. You kiss Eddie again, more passionately this time, hands cupping his jaw to keep him close. He groans against your mouth, hips pressing his cock to your pussy, only the thin fabric of his boxers separating your hot skin. Mouths open, wet, sloppier than before, tasting of alcohol and cinnamon and musk— the flavor of your pussy on his tongue. 

And when Eddie, now satisfied that he will sustain your attention, travels down your body— dropping kisses over the peaks of your breasts, the slope of your soft stomach, the wide curve of your hip— you aren't thinking about anything except his mouth on you: where it is now, and where it's going to be as it travels lower, lower, lower.

As his broad tongue parts you again, your hips twitch up into him, less inhibited now. Eddie groans against your heat, vibrating deliciously, and you feel that fire burn hot in your belly as he noses your clit, tongue dipping into your entrance. He moves back up, lips sucking on your clit, and your sigh turns to a moan as you feel his finger press inside, stretching you slowly. You reach down for him, soft fingers weaving with callused where his hand rests against your hip. 

And it's so strange. His tongue is working your clit, and his finger is stretching you open. But it's when Eddie squeezes your hand, fingers holding tightly to yours, that something shifts inside: creeping, extending into peat, quivering down into soil at the bottom of you.

Distantly, you register that Chrissy's moaning and mewling have begun to intensify, to crest in a wave of feminine satisfaction. But you don't think about that. You're thinking about the sound Eddie makes as you tangle the fingers of your other hand in his hair, the way he moans against your swollen flesh, voice pitched higher than before. Discovering that reaction makes you wonder how else you might make him react. You imagine that pale quartz skin flushed as you take him into your mouth; you imagine that strong jaw tensing as you lower onto him, engulfing him in your wet warmth. You imagine those plush lips spilling groans as you rock on his length; you imagine his brow contorting in pleasure as he empties inside you.

And with these imaginings, you're nearly shocked to feel that tightening in your lower belly, the tingling burn that signals your approaching orgasm. You're shocked because this never happens— not from being eaten out. Not from being fingered. And your breath quickens, fingers grasping desperately onto Eddie's as your muscles tense in anticipation, head tilting back as you begin to moan louder, for once unconcerned about the noise you're making—

The creak of the coffee table is abrupt and utterly startling, and your eyes pop open as adrenaline spikes in your chest, gaze darting toward the sound.

It's Steve, sitting on the table, hard cock trapped behind tight boxers, hazel eyes darting intently between your face and your spread legs.

And it's Chrissy, standing beside him, letting Steve guide her onto his lap as her blue eyes rove over your naked body.

Instantly, your muscles tense for a different reason, your arousal withering under the weight of their stares, feeling like you're a bug under a microscope.

You realize, with startling clarity, that the brush of Eddie's tongue and the press of his finger is no longer stimulating you, that your orgasm has been chased away by your audience. Eddie hasn't noticed yet that things have changed for you, and you desperately want to keep it that way. And it's not the first time you've faked an orgasm for Steve. It's not that it doesn't feel good, that Steve isn't good at it— clearly, he must be since he made Chrissy cum. It's because you can never fully relax enough to let yourself go. 

So you do what you always do: you make your chest heave with deepened breaths, tense your legs against Eddie's ears, but not too hard; and then, when you deem you've gone long enough, you throw back your head, drag your moans out as you twitch your hips up into Eddie's face, writhing against the couch.

"That's it, baby," Steve murmurs, and you know you've been convincing.

You open your eyes when the couch dips beside your shoulder, registering Steve's face just before he kisses you. You open your lips automatically, though you balk slightly at the unfamiliar musky taste on his tongue, realizing it's Chrissy in his mouth. You withdraw your fingers from Eddie then, releasing his hair and hand, and your thighs are cold without the tickle of his curls against them as he withdraws from you. You keep kissing Steve as you feel Eddie pull up your panties, lifting your hips for him. And as the kindness of the gesture strikes you, you pull from Steve's lips then, glancing up at the man still kneeling between your legs.

Eddie's arm is wrapped around Chrissy's waist as she clings to his side, pink bow lips happily pressing kisses to his cheek. You watch him wipe his mouth on the back of his wrist, but when your eyes dart up to his, the ink of his stare— its intensity— makes you suddenly want to squirm.

Unnerved, you avoid Eddie's gaze, pecking Steve one last time on the mouth as you brush back a rogue lock of hair that's fallen over his eye. You aren't sure what Eddie's stare means— if he's expecting you to thank him, or if he wants to tell you something, or if, God forbid, he'd found the experience of eating you out less than pleasant. 

As vague nervousness pings in your chest, you know you need to do something to distract yourself from this train of thought, and the question of what to do is thankfully answered by Chrissy:

"All right, Mr. Harrington." She smiles foxily. "Now it's your turn."

Eddie's arm slides from Chrissy's waist as she and Steve move close; when she settles on her knees before him, you sit up, eyes locked with purpose on the front of Eddie's loose boxers, now tented. While part of you wants a distraction from your nervousness, another part conjures the flush of Eddie's face as you again imagine going down on him, and you feel your pussy pulse despite the lingering nerves. 

You choose to let that decide for you.

"I'm happy to return the favor, you know. Since you got me off." You sound more confident than you feel.

Your gaze darts to his, diverting quickly as that strange intensity remains in his eyes. But when you kneel beside Chrissy, looking up at him, Eddie rises from the couch to stand next to Steve, pale hands hanging loosely at his sides. 

It seems whatever he's thinking isn't pressing enough to distract from the promise of your mouth on him.

You draw your fingers lightly up his legs, sparse hair tickling as you reach up, up, up to the waistband of his boxers, dipping your fingertips underneath as you lift on your knees to press a kiss beside his navel. When you look at Eddie again, that intensity in his face has shifted, heated, turned desirous once more as he watches you slowly pull down his boxers.

He pops free from the fabric, stiff and thick, not as long as Steve but flushed a deep, mouthwatering pink at the tip, standing proud from a snatch of dark curls. You suck in a quick breath as you see him, as he steps from his boxers and his length bobs near your cheek with the movement. Beside you, Chrissy is already working Steve, tongue swirling around his head, delicate fingers lightly gripping the base of his cock— but you don't want to watch her, mesmerizing though her technique may be. 

You want to watch the man standing before you.

Your tongue darts out to taste him, dragging slowly along the underside of his head, and you watch Eddie's adam's apple jump with a thick swallow, eyes locked on yours as you take him into your mouth. His precum is briny on your tongue, and you bob lightly on his tip until he's breathing more heavily. You explore him the way he'd explored you, trying to learn what he likes— licking a fat stripe up the underside, flicking your tongue against his frenulum, taking him further into your mouth, jaw clicking as you stretch to accommodate him. And that flush you'd imagined on his cheeks— you're watching it spread now, relishing the sound of his moans as you suck and lick him, lavishing all your attention on his cock.

Eddie's flush and his sounds spur you on, making you bold. And maybe it's the way Chrissy is so expertly bobbing and swirling on Steve's cock beside you. Or maybe it's your hunger for more of Eddie's reactions. Whatever it is, you're possessed to do something you've never thought to do before: as your lips pop from the head of Eddie's cock, you work his length with your hand, ducking your head and gently sucking one of his balls into your mouth.

His reaction is immediate and utterly breathtaking. 

"Jesus Christ," Eddie hisses, hand fisting against his thigh, ruddy knuckles turning pale white above his chunky silver rings. Your pussy throbs, and you hum; he thrusts into your fist, smoky groans slipping from his lips as you lick and suck on his balls until you feel his warm palm clasp the back of your head, fingers tightening in your hair. You release him then, taking his length into your mouth again, sucking him as you work the underside of his cock with your tongue. 

You may not be as good as Chrissy at giving head, but damned if you haven't had plenty of practice these last three years.

The tell-tale sound of Steve's release— a ragged breath, groans stifled in his throat— is unmistakable beside you, and you keep bobbing on Eddie's cock as you glance to see Steve painting Chrissy's perky breasts with his cum. She squishes them together with her hands, sucking his tip as he gasps and moans, and you're distracted until you feel Eddie's fingers tighten in your hair again. You look up at him then, watching his eyes dart briefly to the side before returning to you, remaining there as you take him a little deeper into your mouth. Eddie's fingers in your hair loosen, but not to let go; instead, he drags his palm further down to cup the back of your skull, voice a husky murmur as he tells you, "I'm close."

You hum a moan around his length, and Eddie takes a sharp breath, jaw tightening, brow tensing, dark eyes intent as he watches you suck his cock. You can feel him starting to twitch in your mouth, and you prepare to pull off and swap to your hand to bring him to completion.

And then Eddie strokes your hair as he husks, "You want my cum, sweetheart?"

The answer, before he'd asked, was no, not particularly. Sure, you'd wanted him to orgasm because that was your aim in giving him a blowjob. But did you want his cum? You wouldn't say so. Yet the way Eddie's face looks— framed by those beautifully wild curls, brown eyes hazy and inky-black with his want for you, brow pinched, cheeks flushed— and the way his voice sounds, that smoky timbre that won't stop reaching, tugging, pulling deep inside you….

Suddenly, you do. You want Eddie's cum.

"Mmhmm," you confirm, humming around his cock, taking him deeper yet, eyes locked on his face as those full lips fall open with a deep moan, and Eddie gives you what you want.

He's briny and musky but not unpleasant as he floods your mouth, cock twitching on your tongue. You pull off until just his tip is inside, swallowing him down as best you can. But there's a lot of cum, and you're not used to swallowing, so it's not surprising that a little leaks from your lips as you try to keep up. 

Your eyes open as you feel a brush against your face, and you only realize then that you'd closed them. You blink, realizing that Eddie's hand is on your cheek and his thumb is wiping a bit of cum from the corner of your lips. And that gentleness you see sometimes— it's there now, pouring out in amber brown as he looks at you, eyes deep and framed by long, dark lashes.

A flutter of wings accompanies the brush of Eddie's thumb against your skin, and you find yourself running your palm softly up his calf, wanting to somehow communicate the blooming you feel inside at the tenderness of his touch.

"Damn, Munson," Steve says, and your spine straightens at the loudness. "How'd you get her to do that?" He chuckles, hazel eyes teasing as your gaze darts to meet them. "Gotta give me pointers," Steve jokes, and you pull your head back, suddenly realizing that your lips are still wrapped around Eddie's cock.

Eddie huffs a chuckle, glancing at his friend as his hand drops from the back of your head. "Well, maybe if you tasted better," he ribs lightly, cocking a brow. "I eat my weight in Twizzlers." 

Steve scoffs, shoving his shoulder. "Fuck off."

You'd felt on the edge of embarrassment, but it recedes as their attention leaves you, focused on each other instead. You look at Chrissy to your side, gaze meeting powdery-soft blue and a kind smile. 

A sudden surge of fondness for Chrissy fills you as you kneel side-by-side while the men argue familiarly. Strangely, there isn't any strangeness between you after having blown each other's boyfriends, but you welcome that lack as she rolls her eyes at their antics, fluttering her eyelashes to imply exasperation. 

You giggle, jerking your chin toward the bedroom. "Come on," you say, smiling at her. "Let's get cleaned up and dressed. Forget the bickering dummies."

-

When you emerge from the bedroom, you find the guys have resolved their petty argument and are sitting at the dining room table, presumably waiting for you both. You've redressed in your black skirt, tank top, and cardigan out of solidarity with Chrissy since she didn't have anything but her dress to wear, though you'd pretended it was just for convenience, so she didn't feel bad. You somewhat regret that when Chrissy wants to talk to Steve about her class again— it turns out that wasn't merely a ploy to get you and Eddie to spend together that first time you'd met— and Eddie says he has something for you in his van.

The air is cold against your bare legs as you stand near the back doors, hugging yourself tight, cardigan not nearly enough to ward off the chill. It’s forgotten, though, when Eddie emerges with a swath of black fabric, smiling manically, brown eyes wide as he brandishes his find.

It's a t-shirt with white graphics: an open coffin and swathe of bats that flow across the jagged name ‘Corroded Coffin.’ "If you're gonna take my place," he says, dark eyes dancing, "you gotta rep the merch."

You laugh as you take it from him, holding it up to your torso. It's at least three sizes too big for you, but you don't care; you bunch it in your hands as Eddie explains, "Sorry it's so big— we only have these leftover 'til we order more."

Unconcerned, you pop the shirt over your head. You giggle as you realize it covers your skirt and fits easily, even over your cardigan, arms spreading wide to show it off. 

You thank him genuinely, then follow up with a tease. "When's my first show? I'm free next week."

Eddie laughs, the sound scratchy and thick, and it flutters low in your belly— the knowledge that you'd amused him. "Hold on, now," he says. "You haven't even auditioned yet."

"True," you reply, smiling as his eyes crinkle at you. You don't know what possesses you— it's a total non sequitur, and it makes no sense to ask right now, but you really want to know. "Was it good?" you ask, voice hesitant and quiet. "The, um…" you work to clarify as his head tilts in confusion. "The blowjob?"

Eddie's brow jerks, but his answer is quick and sure. "Yeah," he replies, a corner of his lips curling in a small smile. "Yeah, it was good."

And had you known what would come next, you never would have asked. But you didn't know Eddie would follow up with a question of his own. 

You didn't know he'd noticed.

His head tilts again as he asks plainly, "Why did you fake your orgasm?"

The words strike like a physical blow, and the liquid rush of hot mortification is so overwhelming that your knees nearly buckle with it. Your cheeks heat, blushing bright in the shine of the streetlight, horror flooding your face as you stare at him. The shame of it— of Eddie not only knowing you'd pretended to cum, but voicing it like this— pricks at your eyes, stinging as they water.

Instantly, Eddie looks utterly stricken, eyes darting helplessly over your face. "Shit, I— I'm sorry—" He takes a step forward, brow crumpling, arms extending, fingers flexing as if he wants to grab onto something— you, the van door, his hair. Something. Anything. "Fuck— Look, just forget I said anything—" 

The sight of Eddie's distress just makes your own distress more acute; you stumble to explain. "No, I'm just…" your chin trembles as you attempt to tell the truth. "I'm just embarrassed."

He looks even more horrified. "Was it…." He trails off and swallows, voice hoarse. "D-Did I do something wrong—?" 

Your eyes widen. "No, no! You were great. I… I just felt, like…." You force the words out, hating how his face looks enough to voice them. "When they came over to, like, watch…." Admitting this is embarrassing, but you're already mortified, so the benefit of truth outweighs the sting. "I just felt kind of pressured, and it took me out of the moment." 

Eddie blinks, frowning less fiercely now, but he doesn't look entirely convinced. But you know by now that he’s kind, so you let that strengthen you. You admit, "I… I've never actually gotten there before from… from someone going down on me. So, it's not you." 

You want to make him feel better, but Eddie Munson is too perceptive; he searches your expression, reading something there. "I swear," he says slowly, cautiously, "I'm not trying to be a dick, but.. has he ever made you…?" He trails off, dark eyes free of judgment, sympathy in the tilt of his brow.

You blush deeply, averting your eyes. Eddie isn't being a dick, but the question is too intimate. Your truthful answer is too revealing. 

"Please," you whisper instead, voice trembling. "Just… please don't tell Steve about this." 

You can feel Eddie move closer, though your gaze is stuck to the giant t-shirt hanging from your frame, concealing your clothes beneath a swath of black and white. When he stops in front of you, body close but not touching, you take a bracing breath and finally drag your eyes to his face.

Those bright brown eyes are so big, and Eddie's touch is careful as he pulls you in, folding you in the cradle of his arms. The chill of the outdoors is soothed; hot embarrassment fades as you breathe in smoke and apples. You let him hold you, burying your nose in his collar, chasing that scent until he speaks relief. 

"It's okay, sweetheart," Eddie murmurs. "I won't tell anyone. I promise."

-

Not long after Eddie and Chrissy have left, your phone vibrates.

You're brushing your teeth, swathed in flannel pajamas, squinting in the bathroom light as you hear it, and when you swipe to unlock it, peering down at the text, you smile through foamy toothpaste.

'If you want to take over as frontwoman of Corroded Coffin, you're gonna need to nail your audition song.' Eddie has followed the text with a Spotify link.

You spit, rinsing it down as you plunk your toothbrush into its holder. "I'm taking out the trash real quick," you tell Steve, carrying your phone past the bed where he's reclining, scrolling on his own phone.

The apartment stairwell echoes with My Curse by Killswitch Engage; it trails after you all the way to the trash room. This is better than Lacuna Coil— it's driving but somehow still melodic, and that first howl is so guttural that it quivers behind your ribs. On the way back up, you pause at the third story landing as you open up your text messages and record the voice note, typing, 'You can send in your two weeks now.' 

At first, you feel silly. But when you listen back, your voice sounds full, echoing off the stairwell walls. And you haven't gone overboard; you've only sung about fifteen seconds, your favorite part of the song, enamored by the strength of the singer's baritone, the emotion in his vibrato: 'There is love burning to find you; will you wait for me?'

Before you can let the rising nervousness freeze you, you hit send.

By floor five, he's answered. 'Holy shit, sweetheart. If you can scream, I'll clear out my desk right now.'

You flush and giggle at the choice of words, the sound echoing loudly in the emptiness. At the threshold of your floor, you type back, 'I'll leave that to the professional, I think.' With that, you slip your phone into your pocket, pushing open the door.

When you return to the comfort of your bedroom, soft light illuminates Steve's hazel eyes as he glances up, a broad smile spreading on his lips. "Hey," he says softly, lips crooking higher as you slide under soft covers beside him.

"Hi!" You smile at him before plugging in your phone beside your bed.

"So," he begins, running a palm through his bangs, mussing them against his forehead. You straighten them fondly as he talks. "I was wondering. Was there anything Eddie did today that you really liked? Something that you'd like me to do?"

Steve's gaze is warm as he waits for your reply. You feel appreciation rise at his consideration, grateful that he'd be willing to change or adapt based on today's discoveries, the things you'd appreciated. 

But as you think about the things you'd appreciated most— Eddie's calloused hand squeezing yours, the rasp of his thumb against your lip, his murmured words: 'I won't tell anyone. I promise—'

You realize that you can't really explain it. That it's amorphous; that when you try to grasp it, it slips through your fingers, visible but not yet palpable.

Like smoke.

"No," you answer, "Nothing really." When Steve continues to gaze at you, you realize he may want you to reciprocate, so you oblige, face open and receptive. "Was there anything you liked that you might want me to do?"

Steve's brows raise optimistically. "Yeah, actually," he replies. "I kind of liked the dirty talk. I was thinking maybe we could do that more."

'Oh, yeah, fuck yeah, Steve, lick my cunt, finger-fuck me so fucking hard, shit —'

Chrissy's mewling voice echoes in your head, words she'd said mashing together until they loom large. Self-consciousness prickles as you imagine trying to imitate her, but Steve's kind face stares back at you, hopeful and encouraging. "Yeah," you say, lips tugging into a small smile. "Yeah, I can try that."

Soft, broad fingers weave through yours, and Steve lifts your hand to press a kiss to the back, hazel eyes gleaming. "Thanks, baby," he says. "I love you."

Your smile softens. "I love you, too."

That night, you dream of smoke and ink. Roots creep, deep and aching, burrowing further down into you.

He’s a late bloomer

He lives in the in-between

But he’s getting it right

First she started a seed

She proceeded to cut the weeds

And she’s facing the sky

'Cause late bloomers still rise

Late Bloomer — Mereba

The salt you scrape from your sneakers leaves tiny pink crystals on the welcome mat, and even before your numb knuckles rap against worn wood, the plastic bag dangling from your fist announces your arrival to the man inside.

"Coming!"

The call comes from beyond the door, and muffled footsteps follow. You step back off the mat in preparation for the door to swing open. When it does, revealing a mop of unruly golden-brown hair above clear blue eyes, you greet one another pleasantly, your enthusiasm calmed by weeks of following the same song and dance.

“Hey,” he says.

“Hey,” you reply, sticking out your arm, your plastic bag held aloft in offering. His brows quirk in a silent question which you answer readily. “Mexican again this week.”

The blandness of his voice sparks with genuine enthusiasm then. “Sweet!” Gareth takes the bag, peering into its contents as he abandons the threshold to wander back toward the living room. You let yourself in, closing the door behind you and toeing off your sneakers next to the scuffed black Docs and Vans belonging to the apartment’s occupants. 

It’s quiet inside except for the low murmuring of the television and the crinkling of plastic as Gareth drops your food delivery onto the coffee table. As you head directly to his bedroom, he doesn’t spare you a glance, already pulling apart the contents of the bag as he plops onto the couch. You’re peeling your scrub shirt over your head without bothering to close the door when you hear him call hopefully from the living room, “Are the nachos for me?”

“Yep,” you call back, smiling to yourself when you hear him rip the plastic lid from the package without any further adieu. You shuck your pants, riffling in the top drawer of Gareth’s dresser for a change of clothes. Inside is a tangle of blacks and soft blues, deep grays and creams, threadbare t-shirts and soft sweaters— a drawer relinquished to a friend in need, filled first with Eddie and slowly acquiring bits of you as your weekly visits continued for one month and then two. You dress for the December chill in soft leggings and a slouchy sweater, folding your wrinkled scrubs as you shuffle out of the bedroom in your socks. You quickly drop them in a neat pile by the door before skirting by Gareth’s knees and curling up on the opposite side of the couch. You settle into that familiar nook, passing the time unwrapping your dinner and watching whatever show Gareth has chosen. The tacos are crunchy, all salty shredded pork, crisp lettuce, and mild cheese, though you chew and swallow mechanically; the show is engaging, a mystery-thriller with an attractive leading man, but its colors are dull and your eyes drift from the action. 

Because where you’re nestled now is in the shade. Your blooms are lazy and half-closed, your leaves soft and lax, drooping downward towards fertile earth. You’re eating and watching, but really, you’re waiting— waiting for a brightness that doesn’t come until you hear distant heavy bootsteps that grow steadily louder before halting just outside the apartment. There’s the briefest pause and then the jiggle of the doorknob.

And when Gareth’s front door opens, only then do you bloom again.

Eddie shoulders his way inside in his dirty coveralls and his workboots and with his wild hair balled into a low, greasy bun; even when filthy as all hell, he still manages to suck all the light from the room. When he tugs his boot laces loose, you unfold your legs and straighten your spine in anticipation of his approach. As Eddie pads over, he and Gareth exchange casual greetings, and you wait patiently for him to turn amber brown toward you. That’s where all the room’s light is because when he meets your eyes, it bathes over you like the warmth of the summer sun emerging from behind a cloud.

“Hi, baby,” Eddie says.

“Hi, Ed,” you reply, and your face tips up automatically, knowing how he’ll greet you: a warm, broad hand resting on your shoulder for leverage as he leans over to press a kiss to your forehead.

The tang of motor oil and sweat envelops you, and Eddie’s lips are chapped from the winter but warm as he presses them to your skin. He hums contentedly when you lean into him, and your love wells up from the bottom of you, rising up your green like sweet water as your vines plump, your leaves rise, and your flowers glow white in the sun. You’re craving so much more the second he pulls away, and you know from the curve of his lips and the look in his eyes that Eddie feels the same, but you both refrain for Gareth’s sake, sating yourselves with loaded glances and fond words for now. “How was your day?” Eddie asks you, squeezing your shoulder three times deliberately before he’s straightening up and rocking back on his heels. You smile at the secret meaning behind his touch, snatching his wrist before he can turn away and squeezing three times back. 

“Oh, you know,” Gareth drawls, flapping his hand, “same ol’ same ol’. Thanks for asking, baby.”

Eddie shoots Gareth a flat look, but you giggle as your boyfriend shoves one dirty hand into the food bag on the coffee table, rooting for his dinner. “Wasn’t talkin’ to you, dipshit,” he says, though his lips twitch with a repressed smile. He pulls the remaining item from the bag with an air of triumph: an overstuffed burrito wrapped in shiny foil, looking fit to burst. Exactly how he likes it, you think, pleased when you see his eyes gleam eagerly as he starts to peel it open. 

“It was fine.” You squint, derailed from your typical follow-up question about his day as Eddie steps around the coffee table, still unwrapping his dinner. “Are you not gonna eat with us?”

“Gotta shower today. I’m disgusting,” he says, tacking on quickly, “more disgusting than usual” before Gareth can open his mouth.

Your squint turns to a confused frown. “You can’t eat a burrito in the shower, Ed.”

By this time he’s peeled back enough foil to expose the bulging tortilla, and Eddie descends on it like a man starved, cheeks bulging as he replies through the mouthful. “Can eat it on the way to the shower,” he muffles through beans and rice, grinning cheekily as best he can when your eyebrows pinch in fond exasperation.

“Dude, do not drip sauce on the floor,” Gareth shouts after him, and you look over the back of the couch to see Eddie waving his hand dismissively without looking back before he disappears into the bathroom. From the other side of the couch, you feel Gareth’s eyes on you like a heavy presence, and you settle back against the cushions, crossing your legs again before glancing at him. He’s looking at you dully, almost accusingly, and you grimace sympathetically. “Soon,” you whisper. “I promise.”

It’s another familiar song and dance. Any time you’re over and Eddie does something, well, Eddie-ish, you promise Gareth that you and Eddie would be getting your own place soon, and Gareth grumbles that you’d said that last week. You know he doesn’t really mind that Eddie’s become his impromptu roommate these last two months since getting kicked out of the apartment he’d shared with Chrissy. Gareth has done his faithful best to accommodate Eddie though his apartment is a one-bedroom and barely bigger than a studio, so Eddie’s nights are spent on the couch, and his belongings are fitted into spare drawers and whatever unoccupied crannies could be found. They’ve known each other for years, and Gareth is happy to help his friend and bandmate, but as the weeks drag on, some friction has formed between the two men as they share such a small space.

To cut Gareth a break, you and Eddie try to spend most of your nights together at your place, only opting for Gareth’s when Penny has Charlie over to give them some space. She’s been very understanding about Eddie being over so often, and you’re already well aware that your sister hadn’t signed up for a package deal when you’d asked if you could move in. 

You’re hoping that by this time next month, barring any unexpected expenses, you and Eddie will be ready to move in together. It isn’t a matter of commitment; you know he'd want nothing more than to get a place with you now, and you feel the same way, but the two of you haven’t saved up enough to make that decision practical yet. There’s the matter of a deposit and two months' rent, plus utilities, insurance, new furniture… it all adds up, and though Penny had adamantly refused to let you pay partial rent with her, you know Eddie had insisted on splitting half-and-half with Gareth. It doesn't matter that he just sleeps on the couch. Eddie Munson is never going to take any handouts.

Penny and Eddie are stubborn and more alike than they realize, you’d thought on more than one occasion.

The couch dips, and when the warmth of Eddie’s body settles against you, you welcome it wholeheartedly, shifting into him instinctively. His arm is a heavy but comforting weight slung over your shoulders, and he smells of smoke and apples when you snuggle against him, lifting your knees to fold towards him. His curls are cold and damp as they brush against your neck, and you shiver but don’t pull away. You’re rewarded with the heat of his stubbled jaw when he leans it against your temple. Your hand settles automatically at the soft of his waist, thumb trailing along the little pudge of fat below his navel, stroking over his threadbare t-shirt, and Eddie’s fingers ghost against your upper arm, scratching slowly in time with your movements. 

In this way, you and Eddie can steal subtle touches and relish in each others’ presence as he and Gareth bicker over what to watch. They settle on a comedy movie, and while you don’t really mind either way what they choose, secretly, you do prefer these comedy nights. Though sci-fi and fantasy hold your interest the most, and horror provides opportunities for Eddie to comfort you, which you enjoy, comedies are by far the most fun to watch with him because he’s at his wildest and, frankly, his most joyful. You grin when Eddie’s stomach leaps under your hand as he throws his head back and laughs without restraint, squeezing you tighter against his side. You giggle when Eddie jostles you as he leans forward and gestures widely with his free hand, spouting off complaints and eager observations alike, flopping back against the cushions and dragging you with him. You glow when Eddie murmurs commentary into your hair, remarks for only you to hear— observations about how so-and-so reminds him of something you've said, or questions he wouldn’t want to ask Gareth for fear of looking stupid, or little whispers of affection, sappy nonsense to make you blush so he can nuzzle his nose against your cheek and call you cute. 

And that’s how you spend the evening: belly full, tucked into your boyfriend’s side, watching a movie with him and his best friend until the hour grows late. It’s the same as it goes every week, a song and dance you’ve come to know so well you could hear its phantom notes in your sleep, a melody you’ll never tire of singing.

By the time the movie finishes, Gareth is rubbing his eyes, flinging a sleepy wave over his shoulder as he shuffles off to the bedroom. You and Eddie mumble your goodnights to him, lazing against one another for a moment before moving. You breathe deep and stretch as Eddie’s weight leaves you and he maneuvers onto his knees, craning over the cushioned back. His shirt rides up, and your eyes are drawn to the wide sliver of pale skin as he drags his blanket up from behind the couch, piling it in your lap for you to straighten out as he leans even further to reach his pillow. That gets plopped at the opposite end as you stand and tug the blanket over your shoulders, waiting for Eddie to flop down, lanky legs splayed and arms open and ready for you to join him. Eddie’s hair is dry now but still fragrant, smelling of apples as he enfolds you in his arms and it tickles your cheeks. You shimmy together, tangling your limbs and finally sating the desire for closeness you’d been assuaging all night with small touches that would never be enough. 

Eddie buries his face in your neck, huffing against your skin as he burrows into you insistently, and you know he wants affection. You love it when Eddie gets needy like this— dragging you greedily against his body, almost manhandling you, flopping his leg over yours and wiggling until he’s comfortable. You tuck your fingers into his curls and scratch his scalp in big circles, smiling softly when he melts into you, boneless and lax as you lavish him with attention. Humming contentedly, you reach up under his t-shirt to feel his hot skin, dragging your nails over his back. He stretches against you like a cat, arching into your touch and pressing his lips to your throat in a mute thank you.

He tries to reciprocate, calloused fingers stuttering over your side as he attempts to stroke your skin in return, but Eddie is nearer to sleep than you are. When you feel his legs twitch, that tell-tale sign that he’s about to drift off, you pull your hand from beneath his t-shirt, smoothing it down as you rest your hand against his lower back. You don’t anticipate the low whine he muffles into your throat, and you chuckle when he shimmies to communicate his dissatisfaction. It almost seems antithetical that this man, typically clothed in ink and leather and chains, typically sharp and wolfish with eager flashing grins and a teasing black-smoke rasp, now whines unabashedly for your touch and pouts up at you with hazy brown eyes and pooched pink lips, soft white underbelly exposed for you to do with it what you will. 

You love Eddie’s black, but his white is only for you, so you can’t help but covet it even more.

Your hand tucks obligingly back under his shirt, tracing random patterns, and as Eddie sighs against your neck, a question floats up, one that’s been hovering on the edges of your mind for some time now. It's a question that causes pins and needles of nervousness to prickle low in your chest, but in the dark hush of the living room, it feels possible to voice it.

“So, I’ve been thinking—”

“Always dangerous,” Eddie mumbles, and when you huff and your fingers stall on his back, his head pops up, eyes holding yours contritely as he rests against the pillow instead so he can look at you. He’d be a vision of innocent devotion with those beautiful curls and big brown eyes if it weren’t for the amused dimple threatening at the corner of his lips.

"So,” you repeat, “I've been thinking.” That prickle of nervousness surges again. “We’ve been dating— officially, I guess— for a couple of months now, and… well, there's been something I wanna do. Someone I wanna—"

“Uh-uh.” He cuts you off with a sharp shake of his head, and your heart falls. Before you can say anything, you’re being flipped onto your back as Eddie covers you with his body, hips pinning your pelvis to the couch, brown eyes glittering with intensity. Your eyes dart between his, wide with alarm as he says, "Oh, fuck no. Never again.” Your lips part in confusion, but Eddie barrels on, brows jerking up in emphasis. “You're all mine now. You’re my sweet girl. I'm not sharing you." 

His meaning hits you all at once, leaving you winded and incredulous as his name strangles in your throat. You think he must be joking, must be pretending to be serious— but when his fierceness doesn’t subside, your incredulity transforms into something resembling offense. 

You scoff disbelievingly. "Eddie!” You hush his name in an outraged exclamation, a little miffed that he’d actually think you’d be suggesting you swing with someone else, but nonetheless a little fluttery at his immediate possessiveness. Still, as you push at his shoulders, you frown petulantly. “That's not what I was gonna say at all! What the hell?" 

Eddie doesn’t relent as you resist him, though the fierceness in his expression finally melts away at your unmistakable shock; instead, in a whiplash mood reversal, he wrestles you playfully, tickling you with his face and hair until you’re no longer at the edge of anger and are filled with giggles instead. "What then, hm?" he snaps teasingly from underneath his hair, shaking his head like a dog until you press your hands to his ears, holding his head steady between your soft palms.

You clear the hair gently from his face, feeling a little shy again as his eyes are revealed from the curtain of his curls, staring at you curiously. "Well, I was trying to say that we’ve been dating for a little while, and you’ve already met Penny, and I was thinking….” You push through your nervousness at the potential for rejection, voice quiet in your throat. “I wanna meet your uncle. If you want me to." 

Eddie visibly softens, amber eyes going gooey like honey. His smoke voice is deep and rich and sure. "I'd really like that." 

Your wings flutter at the gentleness in his gaze, warmth spreading to soothe the prickle of nerves. “Yeah?” 

Eddie tucks your hair behind your ear and drags his thumb down the shell to your lobe, which he pinches three times slowly and deliberately. “Yeah, my sweet girl. I want you to meet my family.”

You take his hand, brushing his knuckles with your lips and squeezing three times back. It’s a quiet way to communicate when words aren’t needed or can’t be used. Three presses, slow and deliberate, a gesture that always means the same thing. 

I love you.

It's snowing in Hawkins, Indiana, and while Forest Hills Trailer Park typically isn’t much to look at, it’s a wonderland in white.

The tires carve deep grooves in that white as you pull down the lane, and all— every flat roof and rusted car, every trashcan and skeletal flowerpot— is covered in a thick blanket of delicate powder. When Eddie turns the key to cut the engine, the silent stillness feels different from usual. Magical, almost, suspended in time and space as fat, dry flakes drift soundlessly down from a dove gray sky. As you dismount the vehicle with your host’s bag of gifts in hand, even the slam of your car door doesn’t echo quite as far. It’s muffled by the surrounding blanketed forest, where every piney branch is covered in a hush of snow, shifting occasionally like wings unfurling when powder falls into the sea of white below.

Eddie clomps up the worn porch steps first, leaving imprints for you to follow in. You match his stride with your smaller feet all the way up to the front door, eyes caught on the lumpy couch shaded by the awning, its front face dusted with white that clings like powdered sugar to the rough fabric. Eddie's rings rap against the plastic frame, and it’s then that your heart starts to pound. Nervous anticipation flutters in your stomach, borne of desperate yearning— a yearning to make a good impression on the most important man in your boyfriend’s life, to be deemed good enough for the most important man in yours. 

Wayne Munson’s aging face is grizzled and creased, but the dimple in his cheek and the softness of his nose are so familiar they kick you in the chest. The sound he makes when he locks eyes with his nephew is husky and full, the bark of his laugh matching the smoke of Eddie’s when he clasps his nephew in a rough and eager embrace. His hands are tan but broad like Eddie’s, also worn from years of toil as they clutch at the back of your boyfriend's leather jacket. The men rock for a moment in the shared contentment of their reunion, and you wait behind Eddie, nearly fidgeting with the anticipation of meeting his uncle for the first time. But when they finally part and Eddie steps aside to reveal your shy smile and soft hands carrying your bag of offerings, the way Wayne Munson looks at you makes one thing abundantly clear:

You needn’t have worried.

“This is her,” Eddie says, and the audible pride in his voice floods your cheeks with pleased but bashful warmth. You’re ready to meet him where he is, but Wayne steps down from the threshold of his doorway onto the porch, his crooked smile widening as his blue eyes meet yours. 

“It’s a pleasure t’meet you, sweetheart.” He pulls you into a much more careful hug than was bestowed on his nephew, and his worn denim shirt is soft beneath your chin and smells of laundry powder and cigarettes. The paper bag knocks against his back, and when he pulls away, he eyes it curiously. “That f’r me?”

You nod, shyness still gripping your tongue, but Eddie’s palm on the small of your back is grounding. “Just hold your horses, old man,” he gripes. “Let us inside before you stick your nose in.”

Wayne grumbles but obliges, stepping up first and leading the way into his home.

The indoor heat glows pleasantly against your cheeks as Eddie pulls the front door shut behind you, closing you in the cozy clutter of his childhood home. The place is cramped but well-kept, messy in the way you’d expect from a single man, but not dirty. There’s much to look at; the decor is quite eclectic, walls and surfaces covered with items both practical and sentimental. The most interesting is the ship wheel ceiling fixture in the kitchen, loaded with mismatched bulbs of different colors that cast the space in varied shades of light. The effect only adds to the charm, and you can nearly see a younger Eddie bounding down the narrow hallway from the back of the house, smoke voice high with adolescence as he calls out a goodbye to his uncle, curls bouncing against his forehead as he rushes past you out the door.

“So—” Wayne’s gruff voice startles you from your imaginings, and you catch his twinkling blue eyes as he jerks his chin toward the bag in your hands. “You gonna gimme that or what?”

The tease in his voice has you giggling despite Eddie’s huff. “Ungrateful,” he mutters under his breath, but you pull out the first item obligingly— a square box wrapped with paper to conceal what’s inside. You pass it over to Wayne, who shakes it, you suspect, just to make his nephew scowl. “You know what it is,” Eddie says, trying to be stern, though when they share a look, a smile can’t help but crack through. “Just open it.”

Your confusion over Eddie’s insistence on this particular type of gift has eased now that you’ve seen the primary decor adorning the trailer’s walls, but you watch Wayne carefully nonetheless, curious as to how he’ll react as he peels the paper back to reveal the picture on the front of the box.

Wayne’s brows contort in a mixture of confusion and amusement as he stares down at it for a moment before a guffaw rips from his throat. “What is this, kid?!” he turns his accusatory gaze toward Eddie. “You sayin’ I’m old and sickly?”

“You are old,” Eddie quips back, plush lips slanted in a smirk. “But, no.” His amber-brown eyes flash to yours. “It’s ‘cause of y/n.”

Wayne’s crinkled face swings to you then, and you smack Eddie lightly in the stomach in silent chastisement of his vagueness. “It’s ‘cause I work in healthcare.” You speak for the first time, voice small, gaze dropping to the picture in Wayne’s hands. It shows a mug in the shape of an orange pill bottle, complete with a white ridged rim to depict the child-safety lid and quite accurate in its mimicry of a prescription label, though the patient’s name is a clearly fictional ‘Mr. Java Joe Espresso.’ “It was Eddie’s choice,” you defend, pursing your lips against a smile when your boyfriend knocks you playfully with his elbow.

Wayne lifts the box closer to his nose to peer at the writing, finally huffing amusedly through his nose. “All right,” he concedes, and as he places it on the island counter behind him, you pull out his second and final gift. At the sight of the crumbly peach cobbler, Wayne looks considerably more enthused. “Now that’s more like it.”

Eddie helps you gather three plates, loading them with slices of cobbler as Wayne sinks into what must be his preferred armchair with a bone-weary sigh. You pass one to him, thumb on the spine of the fork to keep it from slipping as he takes it. “Thank you, darlin,’” he says, and you settle next to Eddie on the couch, sinking into his side.

It begins, you suppose, the way all introductions to family typically begin. “So, how’d you two meet?”

You nestle into Eddie’s side, fork playing with golden crumble and soft fruit as Eddie’s smoke curls gently against your cheek. “Through a mutual friend,” he says, and his voice is so calm and even that you feel the tightness in your belly ease. Eddie’s palm finds your knee, a comforting weight that warms your skin through your jeans.

“The first time I saw him, he was on stage,” you pipe up, one finger running against the textured bottom edge of the ceramic plate, the lip upon which it rests. “He was…” 

You pause as you remember it: that black and white, the gash of red, the aggressive ink of his torso against pale quartz, the press of his lips to the mic, the enchanting smoke of his voice. You hadn’t known how to describe your impression of him that day in the dressing room when you’d met Eddie for the first time, but you know now. “I thought he was the most beautiful thing I’d ever heard,” you say, sweet as the peach cobbler you’d brought his uncle, and Eddie’s fingers tighten against your leg, squeezing slow, pressing once, twice, and then again. 

The curve of Wayne’s mouth gentles beneath his grizzled salt-and-pepper beard. “Ain’t he something, though. My boy.”

You nod your keen agreement. Though you’re angled toward Wayne and Eddie is behind you, you can feel the warmth of his blush without looking. “Y/n works in pediatric medicine,” he says quickly. “She helps sick kids all day. And she can sing, too. Got the voice of an angel.”

Now it’s your turn to flush, and what ensues is a fierce competition of deflection as both you and Eddie brag on each other to his uncle, trying to divert the attention from yourselves. It’s a valiant effort that leaves Wayne positively tickled as he looks back and forth between you until he finally holds up his hands for mercy. “Look, I get it,” he interrupts, “you each think the sun shines out the other’s ass. Consider me convinced.”

Eddie snorts, wrapping his arm around your bashful shoulders as they try to scrunch up to your ears. Unable to concede without winning, he plants a loud smacking kiss to your cheek, grinning manically as he leaves you positively burning. “Eddie!” you hiss as Wayne chuckles, squirming your discomfort but oh, so sweetly blooming nonetheless.

You’re surprised to find that the afternoon spent in Wayne’s company slips by as quickly as snow melts from sun-drenched branches. The man is gruff but so easy in his way that you’re comfortable before you know it, sinking deep into Eddie’s side to swing your foot idly and suck sweet pie filling from your fork. You’re perfectly content to listen to them banter through updates about Wayne’s life and Eddie’s, about the shop and the band and the friends Wayne remembers from Hawkins. You’re a little worried the sudden absence of Chrissy might come up, considering how she was such a long-time fixture in Eddie’s life, but Wayne is far more tactful than Eddie can sometimes be, and your concern never comes to pass. You’re both fascinated and thoroughly delighted by the anecdotes they share, silly stories of Eddie's childhood and recollections of times long past but fondly remembered. You talk about yourself when prompted, telling Wayne about your family, your work, and your interests, falling so far into the contentment of this exchange with the Munson men that by the time the sun has begun to wane, you find yourself genuinely disappointed that the visit is over.

Wayne tries to send you off with the remains of the cobbler, citing his nephew’s sweet tooth, but Eddie is adamant in pointing out that Wayne's is just as big. Well wishes are exchanged; soft plans and promises are made to see one another again soon. "You should come and see us next time," Eddie throws over his shoulder on his way to the door, "once we have our own place." 

"Yes," you add eagerly, "We can take you to the bakery where the cobbler came from. They make really great cannolis, too, if you like those." 

Wayne claps an open palm against his nephew's shoulder, eyes crinkling with his grin. "You better treat 'er good, son," he says sincerely. "She's a keeper."

Your voice is so firm, firmer than it's been all afternoon, that the Munson men nearly startle with it. “No.” They both blink at your vehemence, but you turn your resolute gaze to dark curls and quartz skin, pink lips and amber eyes. “He’s the keeper.”

You look at Eddie, and you know what your eyes are saying: that he's the only one that can make you flutter and bloom, that every sweet drop of succulent fruit spilling from your tongue is for him. You know you've peeled back your layers and shown your green. And when that gentle pink spreads over his cheeks— when Eddie's expression softens, glowing with bashful pleasure, pride, and adoration— you find it's quite alright that you’ve let these two men see all the way down to the center of you.

The asphalt of the bar's parking lot is worn and cracked, but you know it so well you don't have to look down to avoid the potholes when you skirt around the side of the building, heading towards the back. Your eyes quickly find where Eddie's van is parked alongside the wall, but you don't approach it; that isn't why you've ventured here. Instead, you head right for that gray door set into crumbling brick, the one with the light that floods it from above, illuminating its chipping paint. Your duffel brushes against the flakes as you rap quickly, glancing around tensely until the door cracks open to reveal a familiar dirty-blonde mop and blue eyes. 

You pass the bag into Gareth's waiting hand, voice low and intent. "We still good?"

"Yeah," he says a little breathlessly, darting a quick look over his shoulder before his face whips back to you. "Head back during 'Around the Fur.' Tania will show you where to go."

You nod, and in a flash, he's gone. You twist the handle, bracing against its weight, and with your careful guidance, the door thumps gently closed. 

A handful of minutes later and you're seated at your normal spot at the bar, sipping on soda water mixed with grenadine for color to maintain the illusion of normalcy. Your normal spot is in the front corner directly beside the hinge-top, so you can sit up there when the weekend crowds make it difficult to see from a barstool. Thursday isn't typically a busy day, but tonight's occasion is special, so the place is already buzzing even though the performance isn't supposed to begin for another forty minutes. You're facing the bar rather than out towards the crowd, chatting idly with Jimmy as he makes drinks for customers. You're trying to distract yourself from the bouncing of your knee and the nerves making your leaves shake restlessly, but it's hard when your eyes keep catching on the black streamers behind the bar.

You'd spent winter, spring, and summer watching Corroded Coffin slowly grow from regular performers at a single bar to a healthy rotation at half a dozen, from averaging one show a week to four, from modest crowds of screaming fans to immodest crowds of a whole lot more. Eddie was beyond pleased, as were Gareth, Jeff, and Brian, and you'd relished in their success with your consistent presence at their shows at least once a week, more if you could swing it. Of all the places Corroded Coffin plays, this bar— despite its dingy, seedy visage— is still your favorite because it had been the first, the beginning of everything for them and for you. It makes sense why Eddie had chosen here for the festivities tonight, and you were grateful for it because of that intimacy. Still, even with all the shows you've seen, you've never been as nervous as you are for this one.

A hand on your shoulder draws your attention from Jimmy to green eyes shimmering with iridescent powder, and despite your nerves, you beam as you spin on the stool to embrace your friend, muffling your eager greeting into her auburn hair. She shimmies you in her grasp, squealing her enthusiasm as you rest your chin on her shoulder, meeting familiar hazel eyes beneath an artfully disheveled fringe. Tan fingers run through the strands as Steve waits to greet you with a broad, lopsided smile, though you’re both diverted when his girlfriend steps away to survey you, her nose wrinkling in confusion. “Is that what you’re wearing up there?”

You look down at your cream dress with its sweetheart neckline, extending a foot to examine one delicate ballet flat. It’s very in line with what you’d typically wear, both to Eddie’s shows and otherwise. You squint at Karoline skeptically, about to explain when Steve beats you to it. “Kar,” he says, fondly amused, “it’s a surprise, remember?”

Steve looks to you, and you nod your confirmation, holding up your virgin drink as you add, “All for the illusion. I worked everything out with the guys. You’ll see.”

In typical dramatic fashion, Karoline actually smacks her forehead. “Duh,” she says, chuckling self-deprecatingly, and you surge with admiration for her ability not to let anything embarrass her. She leans into Steve’s side, who wraps an arm around her comfortably. “Of course you have it all planned out. It’s gonna be the best birthday present Eddie’s ever had in his life.”

You smile, though you feel your nerves mix with bashfulness. “Well, I don’t know about that,” you hedge, but you pout when you see Steve shaking his head in exasperation, hazel eyes locked on you. “What?” you ask, crossing your arms tight in your lap, feeling a little exposed under his gaze.

But that hazel isn’t dulled like briny mud or sharp with bitterness. Instead, Steve just huffs a wry laugh as his lips curl knowingly. “Yeah,” he says quietly, fondly, and it pierces through the self-consciousness. “She’s right, y/n. He’s gonna love it.”

Though you don’t reply, your gaze softens, and you know Steve can read the gratefulness there. “Come on, Kar.” He nudges his girlfriend gently, and she reaches out to squeeze your hand one last time before they head off into the gathering crowd. You squeeze back, taking strength from their support before they slip away.

Steve and Karoline aren’t your only friends here. As you sip your drink and the sweet fizz of the flavored soda water dances on your tongue, you remain facing the room, eyes scanning the sea of bodies that buzz with impatient energy as they await the start of the show. Slowly, some other beloved faces emerge from the anonymity: Tara and Lisa nestled snug in the middle, Penny in the back corner, as far from the stage as she can manage to avoid the potential of Eddie spotting her. Their presence is a temporary balm for your nerves, offering silent support despite the distance. Part of you wishes they were right beside you, but you’d told them to stay away; you didn’t want to risk tipping Eddie off, valuing the sake of your surprise over the comfort they’d provide you.

It hadn’t been easy keeping your plans from Eddie, though you’d been determined to do it, knowing the payoff would be worth it. It took weeks of frantic last-minute meetings with the guys you could only swing when Eddie was working overtime (which he never remembered to tell you about ahead of time), weeks of singing the same song over and over in your empty apartment, snatching moments of opportunity in those tiny gaps before Eddie’s return would have you falling mute. You practiced relentlessly, knowing you’d chosen a challenging song, one that would not only showcase but stretch the limits of your skill. You wanted your performance to be perfect, but not for the crowd, though that was, of course, a factor. Mostly, you wanted to impress Eddie, to show him how tall you’ve grown with his tending. And after all those weeks of scheming and sneaking, weeks you’d spent on edge knowing one small misstep from anyone involved would have Eddie— blessedly, cursedly intuitive Eddie— poking at you relentlessly until he’d pried the secret from your clamped lips and ruined everything… somehow, he’d never caught on. And now, as the bar’s lights dim almost to darkness and the stage billows with haze that drips like liquid smoke onto the floor below, it’s finally time.

Watching Eddie perform always takes your breath away, but this time feels different. When he mosies up to center stage, strumming the two chords of the song they’d chosen to open with tonight, the crowd’s raucous cheering matches the broad, wolfish grin on his face, sharp and black and utterly delighted at the electricity in the air. The energy stirs you too: blood thrums hot in your veins, washing you with heady anticipation as Eddie’s dark eyes find yours like they always do a moment before he presses his plush lips to the mic. “Hey,” he purrs, and feminine shrieks fill the air, mixing with the clash of drums and the grinding of Eddie’s guitar. This is familiar, too; when he knows you’ll be there, Eddie always starts the set with the same song. “This town don’t feel mine,” he croons, and the flutter of your wings surges from the pit of your stomach up to your ribcage, stirring your green to restlessness. Not just because of what this means to you— it always means something that Eddie begins with the song you’d told him you liked most the first night you’d met— but also because you know that tonight, you won’t just be looking up at him, watching him from below. You’ll be joining him up there, allowing yourself to be perceived.

Nonetheless, you smile at him, hoping the curve of your lips doesn’t tremble before he looks away. Once he releases you, your shoulders sag, relief rushing as you reach absentmindedly for the dainty gold chain around your neck, rubbing your thumb against the textured object hanging there as you watch the guys perform. There’s rarely a moment you aren’t wearing the red and white shell, so the gesture has become nearly automatic, a soothing repetitive motion you turn to whenever Eddie isn’t near. It doesn’t quite settle your nerves now, but it carries you through the next couple of songs, keeping your fidgeting from becoming obvious. And your nerves are almost forgotten completely when Eddie turns around for the first time to show off the new ink on his back, an early birthday present to himself he’s debuting for his fans today: a pair of dragon wings curving across his shoulders and down to his waist, shifting as he continues to strum during the breakdown. The screeches that accompany the reveal are nearly feral, and you giggle when you see the tell-tale quiver of his shoulders that tells you he's trying not to laugh.

You’re okay until Gareth whips his sweat-damp mop of hair, beating out the distinctive hits that begin Around the Fur. No amount of self-soothing could quell the wave of adrenaline that rushes through you then, rustling your green like a gust of tumultuous wind. You take a deep breath before you slide off the stool, and your legs are nearly jelly beneath you as you press through the sea of bodies, cutting a laborious path toward the back of the crowd. Resisting the rising claustrophobia, you make a large circle around to the other side of the stage, slipping into the corridor that leads to the bathroom. It’s blessedly wide and empty, cavernously echoing with the reverberations of Brian’s bass and Gareth’s kick drum. You savor the relief of being freed from the crush of damp bodies for just a moment before striding down the hallway, bypassing the bathrooms and heading directly to the door that leads backstage.

Sure enough, just as Gareth had promised, his girlfriend Tania is there to collect you, her eyes wide with focused intent as she leads you to the dressing room she’d prepared. You rush after her, heart pounding as she ushers you inside and closes the door. “We’ve got about five minutes before you need to be at the side stage,” she says, striding over to the rack as you step out of your flats and lift the hem of your dress at the same time. You shed your clothes hastily, eyes locked on the outfit that hangs from the bar, the one she’d helped you pick last week. It's all black and comprised of a mix of textures, some tight, some sheer, topped with leather and accents of silver to match Eddie’s chains. More daring than you’ve ever worn and perfectly curated for this moment.

Expertly, Tania gathers the fabric of your thin tights in her fingers, rolling them down for you to step into. Together, you clothe your body in the rest: the short, tight dress, the sheer mesh turtleneck that layers beneath it, the tall boots that tie over your knees. You swap your dainty gold studs for dangling silver swords, lifting your arms so Tania can clasp the buckles of your harness belt over your chest and around your waist, tugging gently on the straps and stepping back to ensure it’s sitting right. She nods sharply, satisfied, glancing at her smartwatch. “Two minutes for makeup,” she says, and though your face flashes with nervousness, obediently you sit, folding your hands in your lap as she snatches up the eyeliner from the beauty counter beside you. With a tightly-knit brow, she lines your lids using quick, fast strokes, smudging the liner expertly with the side of her thumb before twisting open a tube of burgundy lipstick. She takes her time with your lips, surveying you clinically afterward before her black lips split in an eager grin.

“You’re ready,” she says, and the surety in her voice almost makes you believe it.

Backstage the floor is a mess of wires which you step over carefully like they're landmines. You hover in the wings with a fluttering heart as you wait for your cue, the muted mic growing slippery in your hands. It feels suddenly surreal to be here, gazing at the band from this new vantage point. You can see Gareth wailing on the drums, Brian’s thick fingers working the bass, Jeff’s head bobbing as he hunches over the keys, but your eyes are drawn time and again to the front lights glowing on the sweat-slick skin of Eddie’s back, burnishing his dark curls to deep, rich brown as the wings on his back shift and roil. Beyond him are blurs of movement, the undulating shapes of indiscernible bodies captivated by his performance. As you see the flash of hands reaching from that sea of dark, you feel a sudden shiver of doubt prickle up your spine. Eddie’s been performing for years; he commands the stage with ease. What if you, in comparison, are lackluster? What if the crowd is disappointed by your sudden intrusion? Doubt settles heavy in your stomach.

What if they don’t like me?

The sudden thought has your head spinning, but there isn’t time to dwell on that because Gareth’s beating on the cymbals, and the song is ending, and Jeff is speaking, voice hoarse with exertion but forming the words that seal your fate.

“—as you all might know, today is a special day. Today, this motherfucker right here turns twenty-six.” Eddie’s curls whip as he looks at Jeff, a shared manic grin splitting their faces as the audience whoops and hollers for him. 

“You’re fuckin’ old, dude!” Gareth shouts, loud enough to be heard even though he isn’t mic’d, and there’s a wave of laughter.

“Oh, fuck off, man,” Eddie’s amplified voice is sharp and loud, nearly startling, and you duck back slightly so he won't see you, heart hammering as he twists to give Gareth the middle finger. The words could be angry, but he’s smiling, and his voice warms to match it. “No, but honestly, there’s nowhere else I’d rather celebrate one more year of dodging the grave than right here with all of you, in the place this whole fuckin’ mess really took off, with the guys who made it happen—” From behind, you see Eddie’s head turn towards the bar, towards where you’re always sitting. “And—” when his voice falters, you know he’s noticed you aren’t there anymore.

Jeff cuts in quickly. “And we’ve planned a special treat for you.” He pauses dramatically, teeth flashing into a smug smile. “A special treat for you, Ed,” he clarifies, and you don’t have the luxury of watching Eddie’s head whip toward him again because that’s your cue.

You lift your chin, and as you move out of the shadows, each successive step allows the glare of the front lights to illuminate you more and more: every dip and curve of your body, every sway of your ample hips as you approach your boyfriend from behind. It takes a moment for the crowd to realize what’s happening, and once they do, you hear the realization wash over them in a tittering wave. You thought you’d known what it would be like to be on stage, to have all those eyes on you, staring, boring down to the most minute details of your appearance. But it’s one thing to know it and quite another to experience it. And the doubt, the nervousness, the fear, the self-consciousness— they’re suddenly all laid bare in the harshness of the unforgiving spotlight you’re walking into.

You keep your eyes fixed on black and white, the reason you’re here. They run over Eddie’s slack arm hanging at his side, over those chunky rings and ruddy knuckles, over the tapestry of dark ink, the way the curve of his shoulder slopes into the cords of his pale quartz neck, the curl of his damp hair against his cheek. The moment feels longer than it lasts in reality, the time between the audience’s noticing and Eddie’s, and you use it to caress him with your gaze, to memorize the flutter of his dark lashes and the rise of his bare chest as he finally starts to turn.

The moment whittles down to nothing but the look in those honey-brown eyes as Eddie finally sees you, a look powerful enough to wither the depth of your doubt. You flick the switch on the side of the mic as you walk toward him, illuminated fully now, light gleaming off the smoke and silver of your armor, armor that matches your beloved’s. The armor is his, but your voice is all your own when you finally speak.

“Hi, Ed,” you say into the mic, and your voice is velvety like a hush of wings but also rich like sweet, ripe fruit.

Eddie’s plush lips hang open as his eyes dart over you, unable to settle, his face slack and stupefied, brown eyes impossibly large in his pretty face. There’s a moment of silence before he replies almost dazedly, “Hi, sweet girl.”

A wave titters through the crowd again, murmurs of recognition, encouragement, and disappointment alike— disappointment, perhaps, from some of the girls that didn’t realize Eddie was taken— but they don’t matter now. Because the whole reason you’re here is staring at you like he’s trying not to pinch himself to check if he’s dreaming. In the face of Eddie’s slack-jawed awe, you smile. “Happy birthday, Eddie,” you say, and Jeff starts the track for Passenger.

It seems to take a moment for Eddie to understand what’s happening— that you’re not only on stage with him, dressed the way you’re dressed, looking the way you look, but that you’re holding the mic to your lips, not retreating as the song begins. He misses the first strum but scrambles to catch up as Gareth starts the drumbeat, fingers moving but eyes locked on you. And you’re looking back at him, looking back until your eyes slip closed so you can sink into that familiar headspace and let the rest of the world— the stage, the lights, the stares, the crowd— fall away. Until it’s just you, your voice, and Eddie’s song, the song you’re singing to him.

“Here I lay, still and breathless; just like always, still I want some more—”

It’s exactly how you’d sounded in the quiet of your apartment, breathy and haunting, but even better now with the microphone’s vocal effects. You sink into the comfort of your weeks of practice, letting that carry you through to the final line of the verse, the last moment of gentleness before the song intensifies.

“Now to calm me, this time won’t you please—” your brow scrunches and your voice surges up as you drag out the words, “—drive faster!”

The grinding of the guitar, the thrum of the bass, the fury of the drums— they fill you up like Eddie’s smoke voice, like the light in his eyes and the rasp of his calloused hands against your green. You channel it all as you sing the chorus, pouring out your passion for all to see. 

“Roll the window down, this cool night air is curious. Let the whole world look in, who cares who sees anything? I’m your passenger. I’m your passenger.”

With Eddie, you’ve grown tall and strong. For Eddie, you’re blooming right open, finally unafraid to be perceived.

You’ve given Eddie a precious gift, and he intends to thank you, to ensure you know that you belong to him.

He’d been on you the moment you both walked through the front door, hasty and needful, fisting his broad hands at your inner thighs and ripping your thin tights to shreds to expose your heat. Your desire rushed hot and thick as he dragged you down to the ground, burying his face in your pussy right there on the dining room floor, too hungry for you to wait for the bedroom. He devoured you, relentless despite the writhing of your hips and your fists tugging at his curls in a grip that must have been painful. 

You came the first time on his tongue.

Afterward, he’d lifted you in his arms and carried you to the bed you share, laying you gently across the down comforter as your chest heaved with your panting. He undressed you tenderly, working you back up unhurriedly, pressing teasing kisses to every inch of your skin until you were squirming and needy again. Then, when you were ready, Eddie fucked you deep and slow, tucking your knees to your chest, his guitar pick swinging to brush against your skin with every grind of his hips until you came a second time on his cock, shuddering and whimpering.

And now he has you on all fours, face down, arms curled atop the sheets as his hips smack against your ass, making your doughy flesh jiggle. He’s clutching your hips so tight you know there’ll be marks tomorrow, little oval bruises that act as evidence of his passion for you. It only makes you burn hotter for him. As do his words— his smoke that you inhale eagerly with heaving breaths until it coils rich and heady in your belly. 

“—so fuckin’ sexy up there, singing my song like that. Got me so fuckin’ hard, babe, I could’ve fucked you right there on that stage—” You whimper, pushing your hips back, his praise motivating you to take him deeper. “Oh yeah,” Eddie groans, raspy with approval. “That’s it, sweet thing. Bounce that perfect ass on me.” He starts to fuck into you harder as you obey, rocking back against him until the claps echo alongside your whimpers and his low, breathy sounds of pleasure.

It’s fairly commonplace for Eddie to make you cum twice, but your third orgasm has long been elusive. You’ve typically found yourself too sensitized for it, your clit too puffy and raw for even Eddie’s light, careful touch to be pleasant. But something seems different tonight. Maybe it’s the thrill of performing successfully on stage with him, or the patience with which he’s playing your body so expertly, or maybe it’s the fact that he’s not touching your clit directly, that it’s just his heavy balls swaying rhythmically against your lips, a slight slap that makes you tingle every time you push back to meet his steady thrusts. Whatever it is, you can feel the cinders of your arousal build back up again under his faithful attention, and you drag your teeth against your bottom lip, relishing in the feeling of him behind you.

His fingers had been pressing bruisingly into your hips, but now Eddie’s grip softens and shifts, his broad, calloused hands rubbing wide circles over your ass as he praises you again. “Have I ever told you,” Eddie says musingly, his voice low and edged with teasing, “how goddamn gorgeous your ass is?” 

He plays idly with your cheeks as you chuckle. “Only all the time,” you say, and the sound of your laugh hitches when he grabs two handfuls of your pliant flesh, pulling your cheeks apart as he continues to fuck you steadily. When he continues to hold your ass like that, and you hear a low groan, you rush with heat as you realize he must be watching himself disappear into your heat. You imagine what he sees: his cock, thick and flushed pink, engulfed over and over down to the hilt by your slick, puffy pussy. Your entrance is stretched tight, dragging with him slightly as if reluctant to let him go when he pulls his hips back. You flutter at the thought, squirming in his hold as your cinders catch to a low flame again, now for the third time. You can feel your thighs sticking to his on every thrust, can hear how wet you sound, and you’re suddenly envious of his view—

“Shit, baby,” Eddie breathes, and the heat in his voice makes you pulse. “You’re so fuckin’ messy, coating my whole dick. Pussy’s so creamy, just wanna—”

You’re left with no warning before his thick length is suddenly and abruptly pulled from you, leaving you mournfully empty as you feel the bed shift and lurch behind you, jostling your knees. Eddie isn’t gone from you long, though, as you quickly feel his breath puff hot against your skin before he licks a broad stripe up your pussy.

You sigh at the feeling of his tongue on your puffy lips, which is so gentle it’s almost a relief compared to the, admittedly, delicious pounding you’d just been receiving. Eddie groans his eager satisfaction as he tastes you, and you answer back with a moan of your own, widening your knees and settling into the new sensation. Your hips jerk slightly when his chin bumps against your sensitized clit, but Eddie doesn’t linger there long. Instead, after laving your entrance thoroughly, tasting you until he’s satisfied, he merely starts at the apex of your heat, dragging his tongue briefly along your clit on his journey up to your entrance. Up, slowly and steadily and deliberately— up to your entrance but then past it, because Eddie just keeps moving up, up, up, and he doesn’t stop until his tongue has dragged across the tight pucker of your hole.

You burst instantly with flutters, with fire that licks your belly and leaves your head rushing at the unexpected feeling of Eddie’s tongue there. It’s not something you’ve never done together, but it’s not something you do all the time, and the novelty of it feels both naughty and profoundly thrilling. Your breath deepens as you wait, muscles tensed as you feel Eddie’s breath puff warm against your skin again, but this time at that delicate, sensitive spot between your cheeks. The anticipation is torturous, and involuntarily, you feel yourself clench and flutter at the feeling. Eddie hums low in his throat like he’s both satisfied and amused at your reaction, and you’re near to a whine when you feel his tongue— broad and firm, warm and wet— as he licks your ass again.

Your whine melts to a breathy gasp as Eddie’s calloused hands land on your cheeks, his thumbs prying them apart for better access as he pushes his face closer. The way he’s licking you here isn’t the same as the way he licks your pussy. With your pussy, Eddie varies the pressure and the rhythm, sometimes swirling and sometimes sucking as he plays with your lips and your clit. Now, each stroke of his tongue is even and consistent, predictable almost, like he’s slowly devouring an ice cream cone. 

But oh, is it effective. Before long, you’re whimpering, a high sound of feminine need, louder when you feel one hand leave your cheek and Eddie fills your pussy with two fingers, curling them deliciously so your hips buck. He ignores your clit, working you with his fingers in time with his broad tongue which swipes against you again and again, dragging warm and wet over your puckered hole. Your fingers fist in the bedding as your hips begin to shift, tiny circles that match his movements. His fingers continue, but you feel his tongue pause so he can croon, “Aw. It's like that, huh?” 

Eddie’s voice is smug, knowing, and it only twists you tighter, making the flame of your desire burn brighter for him. 

“Fuck, Eddie, that feels so—” you break off in a desperate whine, very undeniably affected by what he’s doing. 

"I know, baby, I know.” Eddie chuckles, licking your ass through his laughter, and the breathy sound of his amusement shouldn’t be arousing, but it is. “You were winking at me back here. Couldn't resist.” 

He keeps licking you, long, measured strokes that he times with the push and crook of his fingers until you’re desperate for him to stretch you open again. This feels good, really good, but the flame growing in your belly— the burn of your need— can only be sated by one thing. “Ed,” you plead, “please, please fuck me again— need your cock now, need you—”

No matter how much he might tease and play with you, Eddie can never resist the sweetness of your voice when you beg for him. 

You feel the bed shift behind you again, Eddie’s knees brushing the inside of yours as he straightens up and shuffles closer to you. You feel his head firm and spongy against your puffy lips, and though his length has been left neglected for a while, if anything, he’s even harder now as he pushes back inside you. The thought that Eddie was just as aroused by licking your ass as you were to feel him do it makes you shiver, pleasurable tingles racing up your spine as he slides thick and hot back where he belongs inside you. The stretch is delicious, as is the rasp of his wiry hair against your clit when he grinds in slow and firm, pressing as deep as he can go. 

“Mmm—” you push back into him, widening your legs to lower the angle just slightly, and Eddie hisses as he nudges against the end of you. 

“Feel good?” he rasps, kneading your thighs as he circles his hips languidly, letting you enjoy the deep press of him inside you. “Is my cock makin’ you feel good, sweet girl?”

“Yeah,” you sigh, “yeah, Eddie, I love your cock, baby. You make my pussy feel so good.”

He sighs harshly, and you flutter and tingle with pleasure as he pulls back and thrusts forward sharply, punching a delighted moan out of you. “Yeah, Eddie, like that,” you say, voice thick and sticky with your need for him. “Fuck me like that.”

He thrusts into you once more, slowly building up his pace until he’s fucking you evenly like he was before, holding your hips in his broad hands. His cock stokes the burn in your belly, filling you with steady pleasure that is making you feel good like you’d told him. But after his tongue, the air of your bedroom is cold on your hole, slick from Eddie’s spit. And you’re just realizing you really miss the feeling when something hits you there— something wet and warm that lingers for a moment before beginning to slide, guided by gravity to drip down the delicate skin between your ass and your entrance.

Eddie’s spit.

You’re just recovering from the realization that Eddie has spit on your hole when you feel the calloused pad of his thumb press against it, rubbing you there as he maintains the pace of his hips. You moan, arching your back and rocking eagerly into the feeling of him massaging you with his thumb while he fucks your pussy. Before you know it, you’re panting, nearly squirming with your desire for more— more cock, more thumb, more touch, more something.

Your desire is purring within you, making your answer to Eddie’s question come quick and easy. “You want my thumb inside?” he asks, and immediately you’re nodding, the tingling fire of your arousal bursting to life again.

You know that nodding isn’t really enough to confirm what you want, but a little vocalization is all you can manage. “Mm-hmm,” you hum, voice wavering as your body rushes with anticipation. 

“Shit, that’s so hot,” Eddie mutters under his breath, and you whimper when he pauses in his movements, both his thumb and his hips as if he needs to stop entirely in order to concentrate. And then the pressure against your hole steadily and evenly begins to increase. 

You arch your back further, encouraging him with your posture and the little breathy sounds you let spill from your lips as you pant. He pushes in steadily until the tip of his thumb pops inside you up to the first knuckle, and the breach has you clenching on him instantly. "That's it, baby. Take it,” Eddie husks, and the smoke of his voice settles low in your belly, mixing with the heat of your fire as he starts to thrust his cock into you again.

As he resumes his pace, splaying the rest of his fingers along one cheek to hold onto you comfortably, you find yourself nearly overwhelmed by all the sensations— the rasp of his wiry curls against your heated lips, the lewd shlicking sounds of your wetness as he pounds into you, the pleasant sting of his thumb and the delicious stretch of his cock, the feeling of being breached and filled by him in two places instead of one. Your flames twist high, flaring hotter and hotter until you’ve turned into a whiny mess— lips parted, brow scrunched, eyes screwed shut as you twist the comforter in your fists and bury your face in it. It doesn’t stop your whines and moans, though they’re muffled now, uttered into the soft fabric beneath you.

“Ah-ah—” Eddie’s rasp is chastizing as he bends over your back, his hot, sticky chest now flush with the breadth of your shoulders. As he does, incidentally, he presses further in: his cock bullies up against the end of you and his thumb slips deeper, stretching you as you stutter a moan into the comforter. He grips your hair to turn your head, pausing for a moment to press his palm lightly against the side of your face for emphasis. "Don’t do that,” Eddie pants, pushing himself up with one hand against the bed before grabbing hold of your hip and fucking into you again, his other hand still firmly gripping your cheek with his thumb buried inside. “Wanna hear every sound out of those pretty lips.” 

You’re officially a wreck now. Panting, moaning with every breath, mouth open and drooling against the bed, face hot and flushed as he pounds you, brain empty of anything but Eddie, Eddie, Eddie. You look up at him, glassy-eyed and adoring, and he groans raggedly, face pinching as he sees just how fucked out you are. "Jesus Christ, you look so—” He breaks off in a grunt, dragging his teeth against his plush bottom lip before groaning, “fuck, m'close, but I want another one from you. Can you give me one more, sweet girl?"

Your nose skims the sheets with each thrust as you rock with Eddie’s movements, teary eyes locked on his pretty face: the flush of his cheeks, how his damp curls kiss them as they sway; the plush of his swollen lips as he swipes his pink tongue across them; the shadow of his jaw and the bob of his adam’s apple as he swallows thickly; the look in his brown eyes, heavy and hazy, molten to deep honey as he watches you take him so well like the good girl you are. Your thoughts are sluggish, melty with the heat of your desire, the flames that lick up your abdomen. It takes you a moment to realize Eddie has asked you a question. 

Can you give me one more, sweet girl? Will you let me make you cum again?

Your focus hones to the stretch of him filling you, his cock pumping hot and thick in your pussy, his thumb and splayed fingers holding you in place. And as you think about it— think about how pretty Eddie looks, how his cock feels inside you— you find yourself wanting one thing. You want Eddie to cum. You want to see the way his brow pinches and his mouth falls open, to hear his smoke voice high and tight as you make him moan, to feel the way he holds you as he twitches and pumps warm cum deep inside you, claiming you as his.

Your bottom lip drags against the comforter as you close your drooling mouth, and you bite it through a tiny, petulant whine of protest at the realization that waiting for your orgasm means having to wait longer for Eddie’s. “Eddie,” you whine, brow crinkled pleadingly, trying to urge him toward what you desire. “Want your cum in me.”

Eddie huffs, cheeks pinking further, eyes darkening at the petulance in your voice. “Yeah, baby?” he husks. “You want my load?”

Your eyes widen hopefully, an expression of earnest, cock-dumb need. “Mm-hmm,” you hum, whimpery and urging again. “Please cum in me, Ed.”

Eddie can never resist your pleading, but this time, your words make his brown eyes flash. He chuckles breathlessly, expression lighting with mischief. And you should have been prepared, but you’re too gone to notice, so it takes you entirely off-guard when Eddie purrs, "I know what you really want, y/n. You want me to fuck a baby into you.”

Instantly, you burst with tingling flutters; you gasp sharply as goosebumps rush along your back and arms, racing up your spine to tingle in your scalp, tightening your nipples and leaving you reeling. It’s not something you and Eddie have discussed before, and you aren’t expecting how affected you are by the thought of Eddie giving you a baby. You shudder, a full-bodied and unmistakeably obvious physical reaction to his words, one you have no hope of stifling. 

Eddie groans, deep and low in his chest as he feels and sees your reaction to his words. “Shit, you do, don’t you? I fuckin’ knew it.”

He sounds smug but excited, and you can’t help but feel embarrassed by the strength of your sudden desire. Because you do want that— in just the same way as the first time you had your mouth on him, when Eddie asked you if you wanted his cum. Though the suggestion hadn’t consciously occurred to you before, you realize it has been there, buried deep down like the seed that has since sprouted and grown tall under his careful tending. A hidden desire that now has been exposed, leaving you open and vulnerable. 

But then Eddie’s smoke voice gentles, sounding so sincere as he says, “I can't wait to see you, y/n.” The fingers clutching at your hip ease, and your breath hitches as Eddie slides his calloused hand down to cup the soft of your stomach, holding you, supporting you in an embrace seemingly at odds with the way he’s fucking into you. “Gonna be so gorgeous. Belly all round, tits so big… beautiful, sweet girl.” You feel your green quiver and bloom with the strength of your love, but also with this poignant, sharp longing that floods you. 

He’s right behind you, holding you, inside you. Eddie couldn’t be closer, but you still want more.

His voice is growing huskier, grittier, hoarsening with desire as he keeps talking. “I want everyone to see you. To see how incredible you are. They’ll see you, and everyone will know…” he breaks off in a grunt, chest heaving, words a little shakier as he continues, “they’ll know I fucked you full of my cum. I want everyone to know you’re my girl. I want them to know you’re mine." 

That’s the more you’re yearning for: Eddie claiming you, filling you, marking you not just with bruises from his fingertips and his kisses but with his seed, with the evidence of your shared love growing inside you, sheltered by your body. A piece of Eddie and a piece of you, forever entangled. And as you hear each successive word, your longing twists tighter and your flame burns brighter and hotter until it’s tingling between your hips, driving you toward that elusive place you’ve already visited twice tonight. 

Eddie’s fucking you hard and fast now, wound tight, seemingly stirred by his own words. “Is that what you want?” he pants. “You want me to give you a baby, y/n?” 

You do. You really do. You want it so bad you can’t even speak beyond a broken, keening noise in your throat. “Tell me,” Eddie urges you, brown eyes nearly desperate. “Please, tell me you want it.” 

Through your gasps and whimpers, you force out the words in a choked sob, only for him. "I want your baby, Eddie, I want—" 

Your orgasm surges up so quickly your words cut off in a scream, and you cry out desperately, high and hoarse as it rushes through you. Longing and pleasure, desire and devotion, a combination so intense that you lose control of your body, swept away by an all-encompassing wave that has you twisting your fingers in the sheets and writhing, twitching, spasming on Eddie’s cock. You don’t even notice when he pulls out his thumb; your pussy flutters wildly as he holds on tight to your hips, wide-eyed and nearly overwhelmed by the vehemence of your reaction. 

The illusion of his control shatters. Eddie’s hips stutter as he starts to whine, and now, he’s almost as much a mess as you are, though you’re too far gone to notice it. As you start to come down, all you can hear is his wavering smoke voice, choked and raw. "Oh, my God— good girl, you’re so— so good, my girl, oh shit, g-gonna make me cum, oh fuck, I-I’m—" 

Eddie keens desperately, whiny and high, a beautiful broken sound of desperation as he finally spills inside you, filling you and filling you and filling you. 

In the aftershocks of your pleasure, the warmth of Eddie’s cum brings a sense of peace and completion. When he chokes on a moan, rutting his hips against your ass as he shakes and trembles, you press back into him, sighing as you feel his cock twitch and jerk rhythmically with his release. If you had the energy, you’d push yourself up so you could press your back against his chest and thread your fingers in his curls to cradle his head, but after three orgasms and more than an hour of intense love-making, you’re feeling utterly exhausted. Luckily, Eddie’s feeling the same desire for closeness as you are— you hum, eyes blinking heavy-lidded as he drapes his sweaty torso over your back and wraps his firm arms around your middle, holding you close. 

You relish the press of Eddie’s chest against your back, the frantic beating of his heart and the rise and fall of his breath, though his weight quickly becomes too heavy for your trembling, boneless arms. You push out a whimper and he gets the hint, pulling out and collapsing onto the bed in a heap beside you. Quick as you can, you turn towards him, fighting against the protest of your sore muscles to shimmy closer until you’re enveloped by his heat. You tangle your limbs together, ignoring all else: the sweat that makes your skin stick everywhere it touches, the mess of cum leaking from your pussy onto the comforter as you shift, the slightly-uncomfortable poking of his half-hard cock against your soft tummy. Because you don’t care about those things when you can gaze into the tired, sated eyes of the man you love, caress his cheek, kiss him softly, and hold him close, knowing this moment can last as long as you like.

You lay there basking in the glow until Eddie begins to untangle you, choosing to ignore your petulant grunt aside from a quick fond chuckle he huffs through his nose when he rolls off the bed. Your head flops back to the mattress, and you drift into that place just at the edge of dreaming, the distant sound of running water a fuzz of pleasant white noise in your ears. When the mattress dips, it pulls you out of it, and you stretch luxuriously across the bedding as you feel a warm, damp cloth against your inner thighs. You hum, rolling onto your back and spreading your legs for him, smiling up at Eddie as he cleans you gently. “Thank you,” you say, voice quiet and sleepy and sated. Eddie’s curls tickle your cheeks when he ducks to press a kiss to your lips. You frown suddenly in realization. “Hey,” you say, still quiet but a little more awake now as his lips pull away, dragging yours with them slightly. “Wait a minute. It’s your birthday— I should be taking care of you.” 

Eddie flops down next to you, eyes sparkling as he grins, and you wonder how he can still have so much energy after fucking you for hours. “You’re right,” he says, “it is my birthday. And I wanna take you somewhere.”

Your frown turns from consternation to confusion. “You wanna take me somewhere for your birthday?” When he just nods, gazing at you hopefully, you soften. “Okay,” you hush through a smile, playing with a lock of his curls. “Of course. Where do you wanna go?”

Those plush lips twist a little sheepishly. “Well, it’s kind of far. Not that far,” he rushes, “it’s within driving distance, but… it would take a couple hours.” You don’t understand his hesitance until he adds, “And we’d need to leave soon.”

You squint. “How soon, Eddie?”

He grins, and there’s an edge of intentional charm in it, like he knows you can’t resist him when he’s being cute. “Um, in like… three hours.”

Your brows flash up. “You mean we’d have to leave at three in the morning?” When he looks at you, those pretty brown eyes all big and wide and pleading, it’s almost disgusting how quickly you relent. “Let’s do it,” you say, and the sparkling, crinkly-eyed beam that lights his face is an instant reward.

You and Eddie weave back together to steal a brief naked nap, waking with snuffles and pulling on warm comfortable clothes before rubbing the crust from your eyes. You make a pitstop in the living room so Eddie can check on Smaug the bearded dragon; you smile fondly as your boyfriend croons over him while Smaug blinks lazily, looking up at him from inside his elaborate glass enclosure.

“We should feed him before we go,” Eddie says, and your lips curve with a smile.

“How about a treat? Then we can give him his mealworms when we get back,” you suggest, giggling when Eddie wraps you in his arms, shuffling you forward with little steps over to the fridge. You pass him the small container of mushy strawberries, watching as Smaug snatches them up with his pale tongue, mashing the fruit with little smacks of his tiny jaws.

And as you prepare to head out, a sense of childish giddiness overtakes you at the fact that you're leaving in the middle of the night when it feels like the rest of the world is asleep, off on an impromptu adventure to who-knows-where. You turn to Eddie to see him bundled in his sweatshirt and thick joggers, lanky frame covered by swaths of soft fabric, his feet stuffed in his untied Reeboks. He jams a beanie over his wild curls, tugging until it’s arranged how he wants it, snug but not quite straight. You consider asking Eddie where he's taking you, but as he carefully fits a second knit beanie over your head, tongue poking between his lips as he adjusts it against your forehead, you decide you’d rather leave it a surprise. 

You don’t need to know where you’re going; it’s enough to know who you’re going with.

Still, you can’t say you’d expected to end up where you are.

By late September, no one is looking to visit the beach. Certainly not at five in the morning, and especially not when the gate to access the park at the edge of the island is closed. 

No one except Eddie Munson, that is.

To be fair, he hadn’t expected it to be gated off, though that was, in fact, his own oversight. But you had driven two hours to get here, and it is his birthday—well, the day after his birthday now— so it doesn’t take much coaxing at all to convince you to let him park on the sand half-concealed behind some scraggly trees and help you hop the gate. 

It's quite a bit colder here at the shoreline than it was in the city; the salt air is gritty and harsh against your cheeks, and you're glad for the beanie keeping your ears protected as Eddie slings an arm over your shoulder, pulling you into his warm side. It's cold and dark, but luckily, Eddie seems to know where he's going, illuminating your path with the flashlight on his phone. When the lighthouse looms out of the dark, towering red and white and still as a silent sentinel at the edge of the ocean, you assume that's where he intends to take you. But instead, Eddie skirts around it, leading you from concrete to sand before hopping spryly onto a low, flat rock that leads to the jetty.

Only then do you become wary. You'd been faithfully following along after him so far on this adventure, but the thought of feeling your way along giant rocks in the pitch black with nothing but the stars and your phone to guide you is unnerving. You squint, trying to gaze down the line of large, dark stones to see how far they go. They seem to stretch on almost endlessly. You shiver with apprehension as you imagine turning around to see the distant pricks of civilization at the shoreline, surrounded on both sides by the rush of the undulating sea, entirely exposed to the unknown.

But Eddie is holding out his broad hand, silver rings gleaming in the moonlight. Even in the dark of twilight you can see the rough callouses on his fingertips, the familiar scars of toil and dedication to his craft. You see the leather bracelet that wraps around his thin wrist, the strong tendons that disappear under the sleeve of his sweatshirt.

You look from his hand to his face, and even in the dark, there's light in Eddie's eyes.

"Come on, sweet girl," he says. "I got you. We'll go slow, okay?" His lips tilt with an earnest smile. "It'll be worth it," he murmurs. "I promise."

It is so worth it. 

Every uncertain step, every slippery rock, every gap, Eddie guides you over with patience and care. Eddie's fingers hold yours tightly, growing slippery with the salt spray on the wind but never faltering in their firm grip on you. Carefully, slowly, you step from flat stone to flat stone, following in Eddie's steady, sure footsteps until the tightness in your chest eases. The jetty extends on forever, but you and Eddie tackle it bit by bit. You watch the sea play in the divots between stone as gradually, the sky lightens. It softens slowly from deep, dark velvet until, by the time you've reached the end of the jetty, it's bloomed into the cool, pale blue of approaching dawn.

Eddie goes before you, scuttling down the last few steps and holding out his arms for you. His hands close around your waist as you hop from the jetty to the sand, and you take his hand as he guides you to the strip of beach at the end of the island, edged by untamed green. You know deep down that you and Eddie are not the first to be here, but it almost feels that way. It feels as though you’re both removed from it all, claiming a little oasis for your own at the back of the world.

Cold seeps through your leggings as you sit, and Eddie flops ungracefully to mirror your position: legs bent, sneakers digging divots into the pliant sand, forearms resting on knees. The sea breeze plays with your hair beneath your beanies, but you’re used to its chill now, and you can feel the warmth of Eddie’s body right beside you— not quite touching, but close enough to keep you from shivering. You sit there quietly for some time, sitting side-by-side with Eddie, staring out at the sea. There is peace in watching the waves crash into foam that spreads thin across the beach, carrying delicate stones that dance when it recedes back into itself, only to return again and again.

As the pale blue of the sky begins to deepen to orange at the horizon line, you finally speak, your voice quiet and creaky from disuse. “Sunrise on the beach, Ed?” You slant a teasing glance at him. “This is a pretty sappy birthday gift.”

In the deepening light you can see that Eddie’s soft nose is stung pink from the cold, and he sniffles and wrinkles it before returning your glance. The sea wind is playing with his curls, turning them frizzy and wild and free. “Well,” he says, just as quietly, because in this oasis at the back of the world, there’s no need to raise his voice. “A while ago, I took a walk on the beach with this chick in Miami. Thought I might wanna do it again. See the sunrise with her this time.”

You try to bite back the wideness of your smile, but Eddie sees right through you, down to the heat in your cheeks and the sparkle of adoration in your eye and the verdant green of your soul. He shows off his dimple, grinning at you, pleased as he unfolds one arm to pinch your chin in his strong but gentle fingers. He looks at you for a moment, dark eyes dragging over your face in a soft caress before his thumb draws across your skin. “You like it?”

“I love it,” you say, thick and melty like honey. “I love you, Eddie.”

There’s soft pink on Eddie’s face. There’s the orange light of dawn in his eyes. “I love you, too,” he says. “I love you more than anything.”

You don’t try to stifle your smile that time. Instead, you direct it toward the sea, toward the rising sun, the cleft of brightness that emerges from the dark toil of the water. You lean your temple against the soft plush of Eddie’s shoulder, and he straightens his elbow to rest it again on his knee. You extend your arm, and he extends his, sliding his rough palm along your soft one and shifting his fingers ‘til they’re intertwined with yours.

Dawn is breaking, and you’re thinking about the beginning of things. 

You don’t turn to look at him, because then, your courage might fail. “Earlier,” you say, small and quiet, almost a whisper, “was that just dirty talk? Or…?”

You don’t need to clarify further; Eddie knows what you’re referring to. His smoke voice is quiet when he answers, but it isn’t unsure. “No,” he says. “Not just dirty talk, sweet girl. I do want that.” His thumb strokes across the back of your hand, and its rasp leaves tingles in its wake. “Soon, if that’s what you want.”

Your blooms sigh. Your fruit is plentiful, more than enough to share. “I do,” you say, and Eddie turns his face to rest gently against your beanie. 

His chin skims cold along your forehead, but his breath is warm as he murmurs, almost to himself, “Just wanna marry you first.”

The sun rises, and as you watch the new day dawn, the promise of the future has never tasted quite so succulently sweet.

For a good time call. He wanted to have a good time. It had been a while since he had a good time— his stupid Scoops Ahoy uniform wasn’t exactly bolstering his natural charm. Robin could say what she wanted, but he was charming and fun and everything people usually want in a boyfriend. He was just… going through a rough patch. 

He retrieved his Rolodex and hurriedly flipped through, trying to remember where he’d hidden the number. Definitely not around his boss. And not around Nancy either. Tucked between Tommy and a past hookup, he found it. 

He set up his pillows behind his back and got comfortable before dialing the number with uncharacteristically sweaty hands. He was cooler than this was all making him seem. He was the playboy of Hawkins High— of Hawkins in general. Phone sex was nothing. 

As he dialed the number, he prepared to turn on his charm. Instead, he was led to a generic call-center script, which, after being carefully followed based on his wants and desires, took him to billing. 

“It’s a flat rate of twenty for your first ten minutes. If you finish before then, it’s still twenty, alright?”

He swallowed hard. “Okay.”

“After that, it’s fifty cents per minute. An hour session will run you about $55.” Oh. It certainly wasn’t cheap. He’d spent less on dates before. “Is that alright with you?”

“Yeah,” he said after a brief pause, his mind taking a while to catch up. “Do you need my credit card?”

By the time billing was over, his anticipation had tangled his stomach into knots. He glanced at the clock, wondering if those ten minutes would fly past him as fast as he thought they would. The line trilled as he waited to be connected to his partner for the night. Jenny. Like the song.

That song was gross, anyway. But how could he say anything about it now?

The ringing stopped, and he could hear the crackle of a quiet line on the other side, the rustle of movement. Did he need to say hi first? Was trying to start a conversation weird?

“Hi,” he said, and he wondered how he could make one word sound so utterly stupid. “Jenny, right?”

“Mhmm,” you hummed. He could picture you so clearly, despite knowing nothing— one of those pretty girls in the commercials, laying on your belly on a frilly pink bed, fingernails and toenails painted a shiny red, twirling the phone cord around your finger. “What should I call you?”

He swallowed. “Do people usually give you fake names?”

“Sometimes,” you replied. “It’s not about what other people do, baby. It’s about what you want. Do you want me to call you by a fake name?”

He wrinkled his nose. What was the worst thing that could come from a stranger knowing his first name? “No, that sounds awful. No offense.” You laughed, and he felt himself relax. “I’m Steve H—“ He cleared his throat. “Just Steve.”

“Well, I’m glad that I get to talk to you tonight Steve,” you said, and just the sultry timbre of your voice made his stomach do flips. “I’m guessing this is your first time?”

He furrowed his brows. “I’m not a virgin.”

“No, baby. I mean it seems like it’s your first time calling a hotline like this.” His face burned hot as he fumbled his way through answering, oh, yeah, I guess that’s right. “So, sweetheart, why don’t you tell me what you want?”

“Uh…” he paused, trying to think of a more polite way of saying to cum while a pretty girl talks to me. “I guess I’ve just been lonely.”

“Poor baby,” you said, and he was shocked that you didn’t have even a hint of amusement or mirth when you said it. “You want me to take care of you? Help you forget?”

His breath caught in his throat, stealing his response. His dick twitched, already half-hard and sensitive. All he could manage was a tiny whimper of, “Mhmm.”

“What do you usually think about when you’re touching yourself?” You asked, and the lack of shame in your voice made heat flare in his cheeks. He’d had some shameless hookups, but most of the girls he slept with didn’t like to talk about it. “Like, what’s your favorite fantasy, Steve?”

It was embarrassing. Mortifying, actually. It was basically the plot of a bad porno or a letter to Penthouse. 

Usually, it started by his pool. And a girl was there, wearing a cute, but ultimately tiny, bikini. The girl didn’t really matter. Well, she did, but it wasn’t about who she was. She could have been a Playmate of the Month, or a movie star, or a girl he was crushing on and wanted to ask out. All that mattered for the sake of the fantasy, was that she was pretty, had nice tits, and wanted him. 

“Does that make me awful?” He asked, pausing mid-description to gauge your perception of him. You laughed on the other end of the line. 

“God, Steve,” you said with thinly veiled amusement. “You think I give a personality and backstory to all of the people I fantasize about fucking?”

It made him feel a little better.

Anyways, there was something about summertime that just made sense to him. Skin all but steaming in the heat, the oiled up glow that came from sweaty skin. Wearing as few clothes as possible so you didn’t overheat. 

You gave a nervous laugh— breathy and sweet— on the other end of the line. “You’re really good at setting the scene, Steve.” He liked to be specific. He wanted to think about tiny details like the salty taste of skin or hair that smelled like chlorine and salt. “What’s next?”

She always started by laying on her stomach, the ties of her bikini undone so she didn’t get unsightly tan lines. She would peer at him over her shoulder with wide, innocent eyes while she asked if he could apply a bit more sunscreen on her back where she couldn’t reach. 

So he straddled her thighs, her skin burning up under his hands as he rubbed in the freezing cold sunscreen. Goosebumps would break out along her arms, and she’d have to arch away from the sensation, pushing her ass against him. 

“Are you hard already?” You asked, and his cheeks burned hot. 

“Like…” He glanced at his lap, where his cock was already straining against the fabric of his boxers. “In the fantasy or right now?”

“Is the answer the same for both?”

He let out a shaky breath. “Yeah.”

“Keep going.”

He was already impatient. Skipped right to the kissing and cut out the context and actions that led to it. Did it matter? The bikini top fell onto the ground, and she was on top of him, tits pressed into his sun-warmed chest, tongue licking into his mouth. 

God, he fucking loved kissing. He’d missed it so much since he’d graduated and his social clout had depleted to fuck all. There had been dates, and messy, slow makeouts in the back of his car since walking the stage, but not one since his first shift at Scoops Ahoy. It was killing him.

She felt so good in his lap— so warm and heavy. He could have stayed like that forever— trapped beneath a pretty girl with her tongue down his throat. But he wanted more— he always wanted more. 

He wanted more then. As he relayed his fantasy to this stranger in painstaking detail, he ached for more. His hand was flat on his tummy, and he shivered as he slipped it beneath the band of his boxers to take his cock into his hand. He groaned, the back of his head knocking against the wall.

“God, you’re cute,” your voice was so pretty. He throbbed in his grip, making him exhale a shuddering breath. “It’s okay, Steve. You can keep touching yourself while you talk to me. I want you to.”

“Are you sure?” He asked, his voice broken by a tiny whimper. “I don’t have to.”

“I’m sure, baby,” you insisted. “What do you do next, hm? I’m on top of you, kissing you nice and slow, grinding my hips against yours because I just can’t help myself. Tell me what you’re going to do to me.”

“I’d—“ He swallows hard, eyes shut tight. “I’d want to taste you.”

In the fantasy, his hands gripped the back of your thighs, moving you up his body so you were just above his mouth. He was suave and sexy. He’d pull the bow at your hip with his teeth so your swim bottoms fell off like they were nothing. 

And it would feel so comfortable beneath you— so natural for him. He’d just barely have to lean forward to have his mouth on you, already wet so he could taste you on his tongue. He’d moan at your taste— he fucking loved the way pussy tasted, even if he got shit for it in the locker room when he admitted it— and pull you down onto his mouth so he could get impossibly closer. 

It would be messy— a mix of spit and slick on his mouth and chin, making the tip of his nose shine. He’d spend as long as he wanted beneath you, pulling every noise he could from your lips, trapped between your thighs. He wouldn’t stop until you came— once at a minimum, more if he was feeling greedy.

“All this attention on little old me,” you teased. “Would you let me take care of you? I could slip off those swim trunks of yours and make you feel good.”

He had set a steady pace— hand gliding up and down his length as his fantasy continued to evolve. “Yeah,” he managed, but his voice came out strangled and desperate. “You’d put your hand down my shorts and tease me. Your hand would feel so good. Warm and soft. You’d, uh, tell me how big I am, how you wanted to feel me stretch your uh— your—.”

“My what, baby?” Your voice dripped with amusement and mirth. “My pussy?”

“Fuck.” It came out with an exhale, his heart hammering.

“You like it when girls say dirty things to you, Steve?” You asked, and he could hear your smirk. “You want me to beg for your cock so deep inside of me that I feel you in my stomach? Or tell you how warm and wet and tight I feel around my fingers?”

Steve groaned, throbbing in his grip as he worked himself faster. “Fuck, are you really?”

“Mhmm,” you replied. “Think about how good I’d feel when you finally let yourself fuck me. You were such a gentleman first, but you don’t have to be with me. I want to make this all about you.”

But he was a gentleman. Of course he wanted to get his dick wet and et cetera, but that wasn’t really why he liked sex. He liked making people feel good all because of him— hearing the pretty noises they made, watching their initial shyness melt away into unabashed desire. 

A lot of the time (most of the time), he felt like a huge fuck-up. Abysmal grades (well, more around average), not good enough for sports scholarships, basically every bit the son that his parents didn’t want to have. Who could really blame him for relishing in the times when he could be good and impressive to someone other than himself?

Whatever. If he thought about that train of thought for more than, like, ten seconds, he’d lose his hard-on and probably start crying into the receiver and spilling all of his life’s worst moments. He really couldn’t imagine anything more pathetic than that. 

So he thought about something else. 

He thought about how he’d lay you down on a beach towel, warmed in the sun, cradled by plush grass beneath it. He’d feel awkward about shucking off his swim trunks— he always hated undressing because it felt so awkward. But you’d look at him like he was the most attractive guy in the whole world. 

He was a sap, what could he say? He would hold your hand too, squeezing it with his as he lined up with your entrance. You’d be so wet that it felt slick and he’d feel proud just knowing he did that to you.

When he finally pushed into you, your eyes would be locked on his, warm with emotion, like the entire world just melted away. And how could he not kiss you? When everything felt so good and your legs were wrapped around his waist and each breath was punctuated by soft, desperate sounds? 

It would feel special. With your foreheads pressed together, breathing the same air. He just wants to be as close to you as possible— needs to feel every inch of your skin, sweaty and sun-warmed, against his. He’d just… bury himself deep inside of you and grind into you. It felt more intimate that way.

He could feel himself getting close. A furrow formed between his brows as he chased his high. Moans broke up his words as he brought himself closer and closer. 

“I’d— fuck— I’d rub your clit. Make you cum before I got there. It’d feel so— so fucking good too. It always feels so good. Oh god. Fuck, I’m close.”

“Go ahead, baby. I want to hear you.”

His entire body shuddered as he came, spilling messily onto his belly and chest. It felt like it lasted forever— that warm, perfect feeling of reaching his peak. He was panting as he came down, stroking himself until overstimulation made him whimper. 

“Fuck… maybe I should pay you for that,” you said after a beat. “Did it feel good, Steve?  Feel a little less lonely?”

“Mhmm,” he replied. He was spent— already feeling languid and heavy. “That was… Really perfect.”

“I’m glad.” You paused again,  and he spent that time trying to catch his breath. “I’m on every night around this time. Like, from around ten to two. I’d like to hear more of your fantasies, maybe even act one out with you, if you’d want that?”

His heart hammered, and he felt incredibly stupid as a blush crept up his neck and cheeks. “Yeah, I’ll call you again soon.”

When you said your good nights, he laid back against his pillows. The dial tone played over the speakers as he stared up at his ceiling, spend cooling on his tummy. Leave it to King Steve to fall for someone he had to pay to talk to.

Your eyelids drooped as you manned the checkout counter at Waldenbooks, one of few stores at the mall that could actually be found vacant during a busy summer day. Last night had been a late one— it didn’t help that you couldn’t stop thinking about Steve, your mystery caller. 

It felt stupid to get hung up on the type of guy who had to call a hotline to get his rocks off, especially when you knew precious little about him. You had his name, his general location, that he had a pool, and he had a nice voice. 

Your bangs lifted as you blew a puff of air out the side of your lips, slowly going insane to the sound of Muzak playing softly through the speakers. 

Steve… Did you know any Steve’s? Steve Crandall got into a motorcycle wreck the year after graduation and died. Then there was Steve Odell who moved off to California on some crazy tech idea he swore was going to change the world. Steven Ferris? He seemed like the type, but there was no way he owned a pool since you were pretty sure he lived in the basement of some old couple’s house. That wiped out your graduating class, at least. 

From your perspective on the second floor, you had a perfect view of the fine piece of ass working the ice cream parlor. He was cute— definitely younger than you by a couple of years— and the stupid costume they had him in surprisingly did it for you. You could watch him mop up spilled sorbet all day and it’d be jerk-off material for the next week. 

  He had nice biceps. And thighs. Fucking hell, the things you’d do to get between those and —

“New releases?” You snap your gaze to the other side of the counter, where a woman with pink lipstick on her teeth looks at you impatiently. 

You plastered on a winning smile and pointed a manicured finger to the other side of the store. “That big shelf on the left-hand wall over there,” you said with saccharine sweetness. “Anything else that I can help you with, ma’am?” 

She frowned and you fought a grin. There was nothing that women pushing forty hated more than being called ma’am. You might as well have been telling them they had a foot in the grave. 

The day passed by with minimal hiccups. You convinced someone to buy your favorite book, so that was a win. And you’d gotten to restock the fun pencils. You clocked out and shrugged off the vest you wore on top of your normal clothes and took your hair down from its ponytail to hang loose on your shoulders. Your perm was kind of killing you. It never sat just how you wanted, almost like it had a mind of its own. 

You made your way out of the mall with a brief glance towards Scoops Ahoy, which was notably missing the hot guy you’d been lusting after since your first day on the job. With a dejected sigh, you escaped the crowded, piercingly loud mall and stepped into the hot summer air. 

Most people (or, more accurately, children) were heading for the busses that would shuttle people back into the town square or their respective neighborhoods, but your car waited for you in the exclusive Employees Only lot in the shade. As you turned to head that way, you bumped straight into a tall, firm figure. 

Huh, you thought. He smells like hot fudge and maraschino cherries. I like those things.

“Sorry,” he said quickly. “I thought you were headed for the bus like everyone else.”

You looked up, squinting against the sun, and felt heat flood your cheeks when you realized that it was the hot ice cream scooper. “Oh, it’s, uh—“ you stammered nervously. It was never as easy as the phone line. “I was too.” You wanted to hit yourself. What the hell were you even talking about?

His brows furrowed. “You were what?“

Fuck. “I… uh— don’t know,” you finally said, ready for the conversation to end forever. “I’ll see you around.” And you were gone. You almost missed him calling after you.

You will?

But you pretended you’d never heard it. 

——

Steve called at midnight, just as you brewed your second cup of coffee of the night. You took a quick sip as the call was directed your way, already feeling much more awake in anticipation of what lay ahead. 

“Hey, Steve,” you greeted, adjusting your voice to that casual, sexy cadence that you had perfected. “I was thinking about you all day today.”

Steve responded with a dismissive psh. “I’m going to pretend that’s true, because I was thinking of you too,” he said, and you could hear his grin. “I kept screwing up at work because I’d get distracted thinking about you.”

You felt heat creep into your cheeks. “Baby, you’ll make me blush.” You paused, chewing on your lip briefly. “So… what’s in the cards for tonight, Steve? What do you want to do with me?”

He paused so long that you almost thought the call had dropped, but eventually he worked up the nerve to continue. “Well, you heard my fantasy last time. This time I want to hear yours.”

You snorted a laugh. “Steve, baby, that’s so incredibly sweet, but you could hate it, or think it’s boring, and then I’ll feel guilty for wasting your money.”

“I won’t,” he insisted. “C’mon, it’ll help us get to know each other better.”

You exhaled slowly through your nose, your tummy already fluttering with thoughts of the hot sailor shelling out dollar ice cream cones with extra sprinkles on top. 

Fuck. 

“Alright, but if you hate it, you’ve gotta promise me that you’ll tell me to shut up and we’ll do something else.” He hummed in affirmation and you laid back against your pillows, sighing as you closed your eyes and fell into your newfound, perfect little fantasy. 

“So… when I’m not doing sexy phone calls, I work a menial job,” you begin. “And normally, I’d be, like, wearing an ugly polo or vest or something with our logo on it, but for the sake of sexiness, let’s say that I’m wearing a cute little dress and my hair looks, like, perfect.”

“What does your hair look like normally?” Steve asked, hung up on the one detail that was specifically for your sake. God, you wanted to burn your local salon to the ground. 

“Uh,” you paused, wondering if you should tell the truth. “So I told my hairstylist to go for Kelly LeBrock and she… you know… tried. It looks so cute sometimes, and then other times it has a total mind of its own.”

“Oh, Kelly LeBrock! She’s such a babe. I saw the trailer for that movie she’s gonna be in. Total fox. Great hair.”

You tried to fight a smile, but couldn’t. “Do you wanna talk hair routines, or do you want me to keep going?”

Steve paused like he was genuinely considering it. “We’ll come back to the hair. I could probably help you figure it out, you know. I’ve got great hair.”

You smirked. “Oh, yeah? Where?”

“Use your imagination.”

You grinned. Oh, I am.

You were stocking shelves, as usual— except this time you couldn’t reach the top shelf. Standing on your tiptoes, the hemline of your skirt inching up and up and up. And suddenly there was a presence behind you, reaching up to stock the shelf for you. He smelled really nice, felt warm pressed up against your back.

“Am I the handsome stranger in this scenario?”

You said yes, even though you were mostly thinking about your mystery sailor from the mall. God, even the stupid uniform did it for you. Maybe it was the short shorts.

In the fantasy, the two of you didn’t even talk— really, your fantasies were typically pretty straight to the point, unlike Steve’s. The plot and dialogue would get skipped, and then suddenly, your back was pressed against the ridges of the shelves and the handsome stranger was on his knees in front of you, kissing sloppily up your thighs. 

Usually, you’d have some sense of control— keep your hands above the belt. It was better for you that way. It gave you a sense of separation from what was real and what was happening on the phone. And, really, you never really had a particular need to touch yourself while you were handling the calls anyway. 

And yet… Your hand slipped past the elastic hand of your panties, between your thighs where you were already wet and needy from just your own imagination. You gasped into the phone, bucking your hips into your own touch. 

Steve made a choked sound, crackly through the phone’s speakers. He knew exactly what you were doing. 

“Getting all worked up thinking about it, huh?” He asked, and you could hear a slight rustling and movement as he got himself undressed. It was honestly puzzling that it took that long, or that he didn’t call already ready to go. “Sound so pretty.”

You weren’t even aware that you were making a significant amount of noise, but Steve had keyed into it easily, hanging onto every sigh and whimper. 

In your fantasy, his mouth was absolutely fucking sinful. He would moan against your cunt, nuzzling against your clit with his nose as he lapped up your slick. It was sloppy, and the sounds he made could have made the devil himself blush a burning red. His chin and mouth would drip with the combination of your juices and his spit— his fingernails leaving crescents in your thighs from where he held you tight. 

When he looked up at you from between your thighs, his gaze would be equal parts hungry and sweet. He wanted it to feel good for you because the more you get off, the better it felt for him too. When he felt you getting closer and closer, he moved his fingertip to your entrance, teasing you with featherlight grazes that gathered your essence. He pressed in, just to his first knuckle, and relished in the way you would clench around him at the smallest intrusion before he gave it to you entirely.

Despite the shitty quality of the phone, which was probably your fault, since you had owned it since at least ‘78, you could hear the slick sounds of him stroking himself to your words. And, for once, you relished in that noise across the line. 

You pushed a finger inside of yourself, then a second. Most guys you’d been with got that far then jammed them in and out at a wrist-killing speed until you faked it. Your thing was always just keeping them still, pressing against the sweet spot just barely a few inches inside. Paired with the dizzying pleasure of attention to your clit, the sensation was electric and all-consuming. 

It felt too good to stop, and yet you knew you needed to make it through your fantasy before you came and that precious euphoria rushed over you. Because after the euphoria came that strange sense of disgust, and you couldn’t really afford to spend the rest of the call grossed out by what you were doing. 

“Fuck, anyways,” you began, your breath coming in short pants. “He— you— would take off your shorts.” Stupid, tiny, tight shorts. “And, fuck, you’d already be so hard and needy. You just wanted me so bad. You would press me against the shelf and when you push into me it’d be so easy and slick and I’d feel so full.”

Your cunt pulsed around your fingers, so close to the edge that you could almost swear you were already over it. The precipice was so nice you almost didn’t mind waiting for it. You would hear Steve fucking his hand, pretty moans and grunts passing his lips as he brought himself closer. It wasn’t really fair to leave either one of you hanging much longer. 

“You’d kiss me. And it would be a little messy, but we wouldn’t care. You’d taste good, and you’d feel good. Fuck, Steve. I need to cum so bad.”

He panted into the phone and you practically mewled. God, he sounded so much better than the gross old men you usually had to deal with. “Fuck, I’m right here with you,” he managed, his voice breathy and desperate. “Let me hear you.”

Your ears rang as you came, making the world go a bit fuzzy. Distantly, you could hear how pretty Steve sounded as he came. Honestly, you’d never been one to relish in that type of thing— most guys you’d hooked up with kind of grossed you out. But, god, you’d give anything to watch him get off. Your chest heaved, rising and falling with a shiny sheen of sweat.

“So…” Steve began, sounding a little more languid and a lot more blissed out. There was a sweet, carefree quality to his voice. “Your fantasy is having sex at work?”

You rolled your eyes and fought a grin. “Hey, I didn’t judge your hot, sweaty poolside fuck session.”

”That was about making love,” He insisted. Your heart stuttered a bit. You had to admit that was sweet. “And I’m not knocking your fantasy— I just can’t even imagine someone wanting to have sex with me in my uniform.”

You grinned. “Aw, you have a uniform? I bet you look really sexy in it.”

He huffed, an annoyed groan escaping his lips. “No, I hate my uniform and I’m counting the days until I can rip it off and throw it in, like, a bonfire.”

“I can help with the ripping it off part, y’know,” you teased. 

“No,” he said firmly. “No, we’re not going there, because, one, I came so much I can’t even think about getting hard again or my dick will hurt, and two, if I start having workplace fantasies about you and my uniform I’ll get hard on the job and end up on a registry somewhere.”

“Alright, alright,” you said with a laugh. “I had fun tonight, Steve. I, uh, don’t really get a lot of people asking what I like. I don’t get anyone asking what I like, actually.”

“Well, what can I say? I’m just a pleaser, I guess.” 

He said his goodnights just before hanging up, promising to call again soon. You didn’t have a clear idea of when soon was. You’d had long-term customers promise a call soon that just dropped off the face of the earth. You laid there listening to the dial tone until it started to hurt your ears, then put the phone back on the receiver.

The bed creaked on its ancient springs as you got up, padding out into the hallway. Outside the big window at the end of the hall, you saw a lamp switch off across the street, making the house go dark. It felt a little comforting to know that boring old Hawkins was awake just like you were. 

In the bathroom, you washed your hands with cotton candy-scented soap and tugged at your misbehaving curls. Maybe you would take up Steve on his hair tips. Before you could think about Steve any longer, your phone rang again. And though part of you wished it would be Steve, you knew that there was such a thing as too soon to be ‘soon.’

There wasn’t really a point in pouting. It was decent money. You answered the phone, put on your fake voice, and got to work. 

Steve called nearly nightly for the next month. If having a backyard school wasn’t proof enough he was loaded, his ability to pay your rates nightly sealed the deal. 

It wasn’t always sexual. Well, to be fair, it was mostly sexual. No matter how much you looked forward to phone sex with Steve, you enjoyed talking to him just as much. You learned about his childhood dog, Walter, and his allegedly prodigy-like swimming skills. He was CPR certified, could say his ABCs in French (and nothing else), and loved the colors red, yellow, and blue.

You told him what you could without giving too much away. That Jenny, obviously, wasn’t your real name. Your favorite color, favorite book, favorite flower. You told him that you were in college, going back in the fall. That you only started doing this gig because textbooks were expensive and you wanted to be able to feed yourself while at school. 

Without meaning to, you started to care about Steve. It was probably stupid, and definitely against everything you thought you stood for. But somehow, he managed to squeeze into the recesses of your brain and set up camp there. Try as you might, you couldn’t get him out of your mind. 

“Alright, little Stevie, that’s your fifth wistful sigh of the day,” Robin said, marking a tally on her palm. It struck him as weird that she was counting, but it wasn’t exactly anything new. “You’ve gotta stop or I might actually start feeling bad for you.”

His chin rested in his hand, and he looked over at her with wide puppy dog eyes. “Can you love someone you’ve never met?”

Robin shrugged. “I dunno. Probably not, why?”

He sighed again, his shoulders sagging. “What if my dream girl isn’t exactly accessible? Like… she’s impossible to find and might not even live in Hawkins. She might live in, like, Indianapolis.”

Robin’s expression— the slight squint of her eyes and downturn to her lips— told him she didn’t particularly care. But the store was dead on a boring Tuesday, so digging into Steve’s life was about the only interesting thing to do on the job. 

“That sucks,” she said slowly. “How do you know this mystery soulmate?”

Steve blanched, picking at his nails as he tried to consider a reasonable excuse. “Uh… Blind setup. Very blind setup.” Robin raised an eyebrow. “I only know her number, nothing else.”

“Name?” Steve shook his head glumly. “Damn. But you think you love this girl?” Steve nodded again, but felt a little dumb. He never did things in half-measures. Never felt things that way either, so it made sense to him, but maybe it was a little crazy. 

He just couldn’t stop thinking about you. He wanted to help you with your bad perm and give you advice about how to take care of it. He wanted to surprise you at your boring job with lunch and flowers. It had been a long time since he’d been this excited about someone. 

A tinny beeping sound made him jolt, nearly slipping on the freshly mopped floor. Finally. He didn’t hesitate to tear off his work shirt, leaving him in the shorts and the white tee shirt he kept beneath it for this very reason— not having to walk out in public in full uniform.

He offered a quick bye to Robin and clocked out as quickly as he could. It had been only a week since Jenny had told him her favorite book, and he’d been saving up tips to pay for a copy at Waldenbooks. 

There was a girl behind the counter with a messy ponytail that had half-fallen-out, music blaring from her headphones. It must’ve been a mixtape because it went from some Hall and Oates song to an older Queen one. A little disjointed, but not in bad taste. She was completely immersed in the novel in her hand, so much so that she didn’t notice his presence.

“Excuse me?” He asked, putting on a winning smile. 

“What?” The girl in front of him blinked in surprise and tugged the headphones down around her neck. The music continued— saxophone and a dance beat. Staying Power. He liked that one. Once she’d paused it abruptly, she looked at him again, and he saw a glint of something in her eyes, like she recognized him.

“I’m looking for this book—“ He withdrew a piece of paper from his pocket, where he had scribbled the title down as Jenny told him about it. “Do you know if it’s in stock?”

She looked at the note, then chewed on her lip anxiously. “Mhmm.” She watched him again, like she was expecting something. It took a moment, but it clicked. 

She’s the girl who bumped into him outside a month ago and said weird stuff! “Oh! You were right, I guess. About seeing me around.” He squinted, reading her name tag aloud. 

“Hm?” She blinked a few times, like she was taken out of a daydream. “Oh. Yeah, sorry about all of that. I just had a long day and my brain was fried.”

He nodded. “I get that,” he replied. “Next thing I know I’ll wake up from scooping ice cream in my sleep.” She laughed at that, a smile splitting across her features. “I’m Steve, by the way.”

Her expression faltered, just the tiniest bit. Almost enough that he wouldn’t notice, especially since she corrected it just as quickly. “I’ll go grab that book for you, ‘Kay? Just… stay here.”

She disappeared into the shelves, leaving him standing awkwardly at the counter. The store was oddly empty— he would’ve at least expected some nerdy kids like Dustin to be rooting around. When she returned, she seemed more nervous than before.

“Here, just take it—“ She said, shoving a beat-up-looking copy at him. His brows furrowed as he looked down at the copy in his hands. The cover was bent and torn in places. Corners of pages were dog eared, sticky note tabs stuck out from pages, and he could see glimpses of pen and highlighter. Noticing his confusion, she elaborated. “We’re out, but I had an old copy in my bag. I’ve already read it, so you can borrow it.”

He furrowed his brows. “Is that, like… allowed?”

“Probably!” She said with a startling lack of confidence. She swallowed, giving him an awkward smile. “Just bring it back when you’re done.”

He hesitated. “Uh… okay. Thanks.” He turned to walk away when she called out after him. 

 “Bye, Steve.” 

He wondered why that sounded so familiar. 

Fuck. 

“I mean… what are the odds?” You spoke aloud as you paced your room. When your reflection caught your attention, you felt, and looked, like a madwoman. “It’s not him. It’s not him, and I’m not going to worry about it.”

Five minutes later, you sat up in bed, unable to focus on the book you were reading. It was going to keep bothering you unless you did at least a little digging. But, Jesus, where did you even start with something like this?

“Hey, Rhonda?” You called, popping your head out of your room. “Do you remember any hot underclassmen named Steve from high school?”

Rhonda Finley was the prettiest girl from the class of ‘83. And it wasn’t an exaggeration either, seeing as she was voted Most Beautiful and Miss Hawkins within the same school year. The fact that you were even friends felt like a strange coincidence, but there you both were regardless. 

She carried all of her yearbooks into your room, settling onto the fluffy rug beside your bed. 

“You said his name is Steve?” She asked from her spot on the floor. She flipped through the old yearbook with reverence— pausing to look at photos of herself on other pages. “Steve… stevestevesteve. What about Stephen Cranston? He did the morning announcements, he was decent.”

You glanced at his picture briefly and shook your head. “No, not him,” you replied. “He’s cuter. Uh… boyish is a good word to describe him. Sharp nose and warm eyes.”

Rhonda snorted, flipping another page. “Okay, Shakespeare.” 

You chewed on your lip, watching her tab through until you made a squeak of recognition. The faintest glimpse of a younger Steve in a picture of a home economics class. “Ronnie, flip back,” you said, tapping her shoulder insistently. She did as you said and you pointed. “That’s him. Younger, but it’s him.”

She squinted, reading the small caption. “Sophomore Steve Harrington cooks up trouble in Mrs. Destefano’s Home Ec class!’” She laughed and flipped until she found the sophomore class portraits. “Yep. Steven Harrington.”

You sat back on your heels. “Huh.”

She closed the yearbook and glanced back at you. “I think I went to a pool party of his once,” Ronnie said, brows furrowed as she tried to find the memory. “He was friends with that freckle-y kid that my asshole ex was friends with. God, that was the night when we got into that screaming match and we broke up for like a month before he was begging for another chance.”

Pool party? You felt a knot in your stomach that you weren’t even sure you could have untangled at that point. Was it even possible that your mystery cute phone guy was the unbelievably attractive ice cream scooper at the mall?

No chance. You weren’t that lucky. And yet… maybe a seed of hope took root in your chest. And maybe… maybe you could get him to spill enough details to prove it. 

——

Steve called you around midnight. Your heart leapt into your throat as you answered, thrumming and threatening to burst from nerves. 

“Hey.” His voice was soft, a little tired. “I, uh, thought about you today.”

You could picture him so clearly— his soft hair, long legs, boyish charm. “Hope I wasn’t too distracting. Were you working today? What do you do?” You dug a little deeper with the question, trying to suss out any information you could. 

“Yeah,” he replied with a sigh. “I work in food service at a mall I live near. It’s nothing to write home about, I guess, but it’s temporary until I start applying for the spring semester.”

Okay, so there’s no doubt about it anymore. It was Steve Harrington, the hot ice cream scooper in the sailor suit, who was calling your line every night. The same Steve Harrington who you’d bumped into twice after your shift. 

You tried to push that aside and focus on the reason for the call. 

“So I was a welcome distraction, then?”

He laughed. “I can’t imagine a world where you aren’t.” He paused. “Did you, uh… think about me?”

The hope in his voice made your heart swell. “Of course I thought about you, baby. You’re my favorite caller.” You paused, debating your next move. “I’ve been thinking about getting you all needy and desperate for me all day. About hearing your pretty sounds.”

He fucking whimpered. “I’ve spent the entire night hard just waiting to call you.” You could hear him shuffle around on the other end of the call, presumably stripping off his remaining layers. “Didn’t want to be too desperate and call too fast.”

“Poor baby,” you cooed. “Can you do something for me? It’ll feel so good, I promise.”

“Mhmm.”

“Grab a pillow and lay on your stomach for me,” you instructed. Without hesitation, you could hear the staticky sound of movement on his end as he shifted. “This might sound weird, but—“

“You want me to… to like—“ he stammered nervously. “Hump it?”

You blanched, wondering if your perverse fantasies of the hot mall guy getting off had perhaps pushed him a bit too far. “I mean…. Only if you’re into it. We can do something else.”

“No,” he said quickly. “No, I’ve… I mean— I’ve done it before.”

Oh. Butterflies buzzed around your tummy as you let yourself indulge in the mental image. “Yeah? Did it feel good?”

“Mhmm,” he hummed. You could hear rustling on the phone, like he was trying to situate himself comfortably. “Just made a mess is all.”

Fucking hell. “You gonna make a mess for me tonight, then?” You asked, twirling the phone cord around your finger. He moaned in response, and you grinned. “Aw, did you already get started, sweetheart?”

He moaned out a confirmation and you grinned, letting your free hand trail down your belly and beneath the waistband of your panties. “You already sound so pretty, Steve. So good for me, doing exactly what I say.”

The breathy sounds of his pants and moans made slickness gather between your thighs. Sounded like he hadn’t been lying about being hard and desperate all night just anticipating the call. “We’re not gonna talk tonight, we’re just gonna listen to each other,” you told him. 

Maybe it was unfair to him that you had the perfect mental image of him in your head since you already knew what he looked like. You relished in that knowledge as you coated your fingers in your wetness and rubbed small circles around your clit. 

Steve was loud, which made you wonder if his neighbors hated him. If you had to live next door to Steve Harrington and his pornstar moans, you’d probably go crazy. You were going crazy just from being on the other end of the phone. You were louder than usual too— it was a miracle that Rhonda worked nights.

It wasn’t long before you both finished— gasping and moaning into the phone’s receiver. You sighed as you laid back against your pillows, completely sated and content as you listened to Steve’s shaky breaths. 

“How’re you feeling?” You asked, fighting the desire to twirl your hair around your fingers. 

“Good,” he said finally. “Gonna have to do laundry, wash my sheets. I probably needed to anyway.” He paused. “I picked up a copy of that book you were talking about. It’s actually funny, ‘cause they were out of copies apparently, but the girl behind the counter let me have hers. Like it was meant to be, or something.”

Your heart hammered. “That’s really sweet, Steve,” you said softly. “I’m sorry in advance if you hate it.”

“I won’t!” He insisted. “I read the first couple of pages while I waited to call. I’m not the best reader, though. Might take me a while to finish it, but I do like it so far.”

You were partially convinced that you were in love with Steve Harrington, despite the fact that he wouldn’t even recognize you on the street. “This might be… I mean, maybe it’s crossing a line, and I could totally get fired for even suggesting… but—“ You hesitated. Fuck it. “I want to give you my personal line. So you don’t have to pay to talk to me. It’s not fair if we’re both enjoying the conversations but only one of us is paying, you know?”

He was quiet, almost too quiet. Nerves stirred in your belly. “Is that… you know, okay?”

“Yeah, I’d like that,” he said quickly. “Let me just grab a pen.”

You couldn’t help but stare longingly down into the atrium of the mall, where Steve Harrington was sweeping crumbs off of one of the booths inside Scoops Ahoy.

“Hello?” A kid snapped his fingers a few times and you swallowed down your annoyance as you turned. “We called earlier about Ender’s Game. The guy on the phone said he’d hold three copies. It’s under Mike.”

You glanced behind you, where the books clearly weren’t. Fuck Greg for making your menial job even worse. “It must’ve slipped his mind. I can grab those for you.” The kid made a bitchy face as you stepped away from the counter and you bit your tongue to keep from saying something rude. Fucking latchkey kids.

When you returned with three copies of the book, you looked at the kids skeptically. “By the way, if you stole any of the pencils or bookmarks, my boss is going to take it out of my paycheck and I won’t be able to feed my kids.”

“It costs thirty cents to feed your kids?”

You sighed and rang them up, but they continued to loiter in the shelves while you pretended to be busy. 

“There’s nothing to do,” one of them said after picking up a copy of Sports Illustrated briefly. “We should just go back to my house and play Atari.”

A red-haired girl rolled her eyes. “Lucas, we’re not playing Pong again.” She paused and glanced down towards the food court. “We could go see Steve.”

It took all your willpower not to react. 

“Why do you always want to go see Steve?” Lucas asked. “It’s not like you have a boyfriend or anything.”

“She just wants to see him because she’s got some weird crush on him,” the bitchy one said. Mike? The red-haired girl blushed nearly as fiery as her hair and shoved Mike hard. “What? We all know it. You and El are always drooling over him. It’s weird.”

“He’s nice, okay? Way nicer than you are, asshole.” She shoved past the group and left on her own, leaving the other two guys to scramble after her. One kid was left behind, the one with the unfortunate bowl cut. He offered a wave before he followed after them. 

When they got downstairs, you watched him greet the redhead with a smile and a ruffle of her hair. Lucas and the bowl-cut kid got a slap on the back, and the bitchy one got a half-smile that wasn’t returned. 

Then he shelled out free ice cream, which was evident because none of them made a move to pay. 

After they left, you watched him reach into his own wallet and cover the cost, placing the bills carefully into the cash register. 

The rest of your shift was spent fawning over Steve and flipping through issues of the magazines you had on display. You felt idiotic gazing at Steve Harrington with puppy dog eyes while reading Top Ten Ways to Know if He’s Really Into You! Of course he wasn’t into you— he didn’t even know who you were, not really. 

Around two in the afternoon, you were snapped out of your reverie by the sight of Steve walking through the threshold of the shop, looking around the shop before his gaze settled on you and lit up in recognition. 

“Hi!” He said, nearly knocking over a carefully displayed unofficial biography of Reagan on his way over. You smiled, straightening your posture as he approached. “I wanted to thank you for the book.”

Your heart thumped. “Oh, you don’t need to thank me,” you insisted. “I just wanted to help.”

He reached into the pocket of his uniform and pulled out two coupons to Scoops Ahoy with a flourish. They advertised free ice cream in the nautical scrawl. “Does this change your mind?” He raised his brows and smiled smugly. 

You rolled your eyes and grabbed them, reading the fine print. Valid only at the Starcourt Mall location on weekdays between 8am and 11am. Offer not valid in conjunction with any other deals. Offer excludes banana splits, sundaes, and the U.S.S. Butterscotch.

“Maybe,” you replied. “Is free ice cream your thing or something? I saw you give that group of kids free sundaes earlier.”

He furrowed his brows, considering it, then grinned. “Are you watching me?”

Fuck. You spluttered, shaking your head as you fumbled through a response. “No. They were here first, then talked about going to see you, and then I just…” He laughed and leaned over the desk slightly, as if testing the view. 

“Oh, yeah. Perfect view from here.”

You rolled your eyes, trying to fight the heat burning in your cheeks. “So you come here to thank me with shitty coupons, and then you accuse me of spying on you?”

He shook his head as he leaned back. “Hey, it’s not accusing you if it’s true.” He was so smug. “Anyway, I’ll get out of your hair. See you around?” He looked at you expectantly until you nodded, face burning hot. He smiled, shoved his hands into his pockets, and walked out casually like he hadn’t just totally caught you creeping on him. 

God, you were going to make him pay for that later. 

——

Steve paced around his room as he tried to gain the courage to call you. He would have liked to say that he needed to get your number from his Rolodex, but he’d memorized it nearly the moment he put it down on paper. 

He was thinking of you, but he was also thinking about the girl from the mall who seemed to keep popping up. There was something about her, the way he was drawn to her, the way she spoke, the way she looked at him. It was all so familiar and easy, like they’d known each other forever. 

He didn’t know how to feel about that. 

Finally, he settled on his bed, dressed only in a thin white tank top and boxers that were a size too big since he stopped working out as much. With nerves buzzing in his ears, he dialed your number and waited. 

And waited. And waited. He swallowed hard, wondering if you’d given him a fake number just to be rid of him. The number went to the answering machine, and his mouth went dry. 

“Hi! You’ve reached Y/N Y/L/N. I’m out right now, but leave your name and number at the beep and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can!” A beep sounded and Steve hung up suddenly. His stomach sank. 

He wasn’t supposed to know your real name like that. It felt like some gross intrusion. And yet, he repeated it over and over again in his mind. Why did it seem so familiar?

On his nightstand, the beat up paperback he had borrowed stood out like a sore thumb. Oh. The book, the same book you, Jenny, had told him about. And the girl who worked there… Y/N. 

It was too much, far too much to be a coincidence. He grabbed the book and opened it to look at the inside cover, where your name, Jenny’s name was scrawled inside. Because you and Jenny were the same person. 

Every single conversation leading up to that point played over in his mind. The messy perm, the shitty job with the ugly polo, the fantasy about being pushed against the shelves and fucked. Oh, God. And you were totally spying on him. 

It should’ve been an absolute win for him, but his stomach turned as he glanced over at the phone on the receiver. You were gorgeous and funny and smart and so sexy. Why would you want to be with someone who needed to call a sex hotline?

He could just picture the look on your face when you discovered that the guy who worked in the stupid uniform at Scoops was so pathetic that he needed to call someone to get attention. 

He swallowed hard, guilt and doubt settling icy in his stomach. He put the book down, and didn’t call back.

——

Steve was sulking during his shift. Probably biting the heads off of a few too many kids who asked for a few too many samples. 

“Jesus, how many times do you need to try cotton candy?” He snapped as he dug out a tiny spoonful of the pink and blue ice cream. The kid furrowed his brows up at him, puzzled by the sudden outburst. 

“Uh, can I try Cherries Jubilee next?” He asked hesitantly. 

Steve exhaled slowly through his nose. “No, you’re done. Out.”

The kid rolled his eyes, swore under his breath, and stomped out of Scoops Ahoy. 

Robin was staring at him funny when he turned around, a mix of curiosity and amusement. “You’re totally PMSing today.”

He couldn’t manage more than a scowl in response. “Shut up.”

Robin laughed and tossed a cherry at him, which he managed to catch before it splattered against the glass of the ice cream case. He hated maraschino cherries— the artificial sweetness and unnatural color. But, hey, he could tie a cherry stem into a knot with his tongue.

He hadn’t called you for three days, which felt like the longest stretch of time in his life. And he hadn’t even seen you around Starcourt, which was both a good thing and absolutely unbearable. 

Part of him wanted to just jump on the escalator and see if you were sitting behind the counter at Waldenbooks, but he knew it was better to just have a clean break. Maybe in a few months, you’d forget about that Steve guy who’d called you and he could make his move then.

The shift change hit around lunchtime, and Steve prepared for the influx of people who were getting off work on empty stomachs. As he suspected, the line stretched out the door and he was practically up to his elbows in ice cream, mindlessly scooping flavor combinations that should’ve been illegal. Until—

“Hey, Steve,” you said, standing in front of him in your ugly work polo with messy hair half-fallen out of your ponytail. “Staying busy?”

He stammered nervously and mumbled out an unintelligible response. “Ice cream?” Was all that he could manage to ask, which made him want to throw himself into the fountain right in the middle of the food court. 

But you just smiled. “A shake, actually. Chocolate banana if that’s possible.” He nodded and got to work, thankful for the distraction. Your eyes followed his every movement as he made your shake, but he couldn’t let himself look at you.

Because if he did really look at you, all he’d be able to think about were the phone calls you’d had— the calls where he’d heard you cum with breathy gasps and pants and soft whimpers. And— Jesus Christ— he was thinking about it and it made him feel dizzy. 

He used a little bit too much whipped cream and put rainbow sprinkles on top for God knows why, but he handed it to you with a weak smile. 

“Three bucks, right?” You asked, nodding to the menu.

“Uh, you can just have it,” he said without even thinking. “On the house.”

You furrowed your brows for a moment,  but smiled brightly. “Really? Thanks, Steve. I appreciate it.” You took a sip and gave a soft moan at the flavor that made a full-body chill run through him. “See you around?”

“Yeah. See you.” You gave a small wave before you disappeared into the food court. He watched you the whole way, like you were the only person in the room.

Fuck. He was hard. Like, rock hard and the stupid apron on the uniform only made it more obvious. He’d fucking pavloved himself to get turned on just by your voice. 

“Robin, I’m taking my fifteen,” he said, darting into the back before she could protest. He stepped inside the walk-in freezer and propped the door with a crate of waffle cones. After about five minutes, he felt like he could actually think again.

“Fuck,” He muttered under his breath. He had to call you again.

You were sincerely considering quitting the hotline. After Steve, just listening to the other guys panting and blowing their loads on the phone was nauseating. They didn’t care to learn more about you, not the way he did. They just wanted to get their rocks off to an anonymous, sexy voice. 

Then again, Steve had disappeared too. Maybe giving him your real number had crossed a line. Maybe it freaked him out that you were taking it beyond a transaction. You sighed and wrapped yourself tighter in your house coat. Rhonda always kept the AC on overdrive in the summer, which meant you needed at least two blankets to be comfortable. 

When the phone rang, you picked it up without thinking, half expecting it to be Rhonda calling you to check in during her break. 

“Hey,” you said absentmindedly, leaning back against your pillows. 

“This is, uh— this is the right number, right? It’s Steve.”

Your heart nearly burst out of your chest at the sound of his voice. “Hey, yeah, it’s the right number,” you assured. You wriggled out of your housecoat and tossed it to the side so you could get more comfortable. “How are you? It’s been a few days.”

He sighed. “Yeah, I, uh,” he paused. “I think I psyched myself out of calling you.”

“Oh,” you said softly. “Well, I’m glad you did call. I really missed you.”

“You did?”

You laughed, letting yourself get more comfortable. “Mhmm,” you replied. “I mean, we’ve been talking everyday for a while, you know?”

“I missed you too, couldn’t stop thinking about you, even at work.” You smiled, remembering how absentminded he had seemed when you showed up in the ice cream parlor. And he was thinking about you. Not you, but still you. “I— uh— had to walk into our deep freezer to cool myself off.”

“How long has it been for you?” You asked suddenly. “Like, since you’ve had sex.”

Steve chuckled nervously. “I dunno… two months?” He paused. “Is that lame?”

“Nuh-uh, baby,” you assured. “Think it’s sweet. No wonder you’re all needy all the time. You need a nice, tight, wet pussy to sink into, hm?”

A low moan escaped his lips. “God—“

“Better than your hand, isn’t it?” You teased. “I bet you’re so desperate that you’ve been touching yourself this whole time, even before you called me. Isn’t that right?”

The closest thing you got in response was another pretty moan. “You’re big too, aren’t you?” You mused aloud, not even waiting for a response. “I know you are, you’ve basically told me in not so many words. Most girls can’t handle that, baby. It’s not your fault. That’s okay, we could take it slow, you could get me all nice and stretched for you, take your time like the gentleman you are.”

“Fuck— fuck—“ His words came out choked and desperate. You could almost picture it— the way he’d be fucking up into his hand, needing more and more.

“I bet you always have to take it real slow, huh? Gotta be careful so you don’t hurt someone. But that just means you can feel everything better, doesn’t it? Inch by inch by inch, every flutter and squeeze. And you can see on their faces how good it feels, can’t you? You can watch their eyes roll back and their mouths fall open while they cry out for you. I mean, Jesus, Steve, I bet most girls come before you’re even all the way inside.”

His hand sped up, desperate and needy, just as you’d said. You could hear it with each wet slap of skin against skin. His moans were constant, a stream of yesahgodfuckohshitahyesahfuckfuckfuck— until the prettiest moan escaped his lips, all low and deep, and you knew he’d made a pretty mess of himself. 

“Bet that felt really nice,” you said while he panted on the other end of the line. 

He made a weak noise, then finally managed a, “Uh-huh. Fuck.”

You laughed softly. “That’s gotta be the fastest I’ve gotten you off,” you said finally. “I like having that much power over you. It turns me on so much.”

He groaned. “Fuck, give me five— no— ten minutes. I can barely breathe right now.”

You grinned, relishing in your ability to torture him a bit after he’d teased you at work. Unknowingly, of course, but still. “I dunno if I can wait that long, Steve… I’m so wet that my thighs are all sticky.”

“God, you’re killing me.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at his dramatics. “Why don’t you lay there and listen to me? Be good and keep your hands off, alright? You already came, so don’t get greedy.”

He made a nearly pained noise. “Fine. Fine.”

A smirk spread across your lips as you let your hand move between your thighs. Really, you weren’t exaggerating that much— you found yourself slick and needy when you finally slid your panties down your thighs. Actually, you thought you’d probably have to be a statue to hear Steve Harrington panting and cumming over the phone and stay unaffected.

You could hear his breath catch with every soft moan and whimper, and maybe you got mean and held the phone near your tummy, so he could hear just how wet and messy you’d gotten as you steadily fucked yourself with your fingers. When you got desperate enough, you held the phone against your ear once more. 

“I dunno, Steve… I don’t think my fingers can cut it,” you said, exaggerating the pouty tone of your voice. “I wish you were here to take care of me.”

He groaned, low and muffled. You had a feeling he’d thrown an arm over his face. “You’re so unfair.”

A smile spread across your lips at his words. “No, baby. What’s unfair is that I’m laying here all alone, feeling so empty and needy, and you’re not here to make it all better.” You reached into your nightstand, pulling out the dildo you’d bought for your twentieth birthday. “‘S okay, I can take care of myself just fine. You ever been to a sex shop?”

It got quiet on the line, and you could nearly hear the gears turning. 

“N-no.”

You raised a brow. “Really? But you know what they sell, don’t you?” You paused until he hummed a soft uh-huh. “It’s only fair that I get to use a toy to fill myself up since you can’t do it for me, right?”

“Y-yeah, wanna hear you do it.”

You grinned. “Patience, baby. Gotta get it wet first so it glides in nice and easy.”

Blowing a rubber dick wasn’t how you’d envisioned ending your day, but— what can you say?— spontaneity is the spice of life. You made sure he heard every wet pass of it between your lips, every exaggerated gag as you took it into your throat, the messy smack of your lips. It tasted like a tire and dish soap, but the desperate, restrained sounds he was making made it all worth it. 

Your eyes were watery when you finally pulled the toy from your mouth, certain you’d adequately worked him up for the time being. Plus, you were worked up just as much, if not more— you wanted to just fuck yourself into oblivion already. 

Instinctively, your thighs fell farther apart as you moved the toy between your legs. You let the tip tease your entrance, only a little, before you began to push it inside. A soft moan fell from your lips as you finally got the nice, full feeling you’d been dreaming of. 

You laid there for a moment, letting your body adjust to it, reveling in it. With your free hand, you slowly circled your clit until your cunt fluttered around the intrusion. 

“Feels so nice,” you sighed, lips brushing against the mouthpiece of the phone. You felt drunk and hazy with desire. “Like I’m so close already that I can taste it.”

“Make yourself come for me,” he practically begged. “Wanna hear it.”

You moaned at his words, but shook your head. “Can’t yet. I wanna make this last.”

Time felt a little hazy as you kept working the toy in and out, slow and deep. Occasionally, you’d brush against your clit just right, or the toy would find a nice spot inside of you, and your entire body would tremble with need. 

Steve’s breath came in pants over the phone, but you couldn’t tell if he had broken and actually started to touch himself. You kind of hoped he did, even if you wouldn’t say it. 

Eventually, you came without warning— the build-up of it all made it impossible to avoid. Once you started over that edge, you couldn’t crawl back even if you’d wanted to. Moans fell from your lips as you succumbed to your orgasm; every nerve was like a live wire. When it finally came to be too much, you slipped the toy out and relaxed onto your bed with a contented sigh. 

“Are you still alive?” You asked, quiet crackling over the phone. 

“Uh… yeah,” he replied, a little distracted. “Have you ever come without having to touch yourself?”

You laughed softly. “Once. I read in Cosmo that some girls can get off just from playing with their tits. Took a while, but I eventually got there. Why?”

“I just, uh… listening to you, all the noises and hearing how wet you were… I guess that was all it took.” He sounded so embarrassed, but it was the cutest fucking thing you’d ever heard. You could imagine it so clearly, his cock pulsing against his twitching stomach, cum making puddles around his navel. 

“That’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard,” you said with a smile. “You’re probably exhausted, huh?”

He laughed a bit. “A little, but I can stay up and talk, if you’re free.”

Ever the gentleman, Steve stayed up another hour to talk about whatever you could think of to keep the conversation running. The new collection at The Gap, whether or not he planned to see Back to the Future, his favorite music got him talking for half an hour at least. Finally, you were yawning and beat. 

“Steve, baby, I should go to sleep,” you said, almost apologetically. 

“That’s okay. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

You froze, brows furrowing. “What?”

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he repeated, sleepily. “At the mall.”

“Um… night,” you said quickly, panicking slightly as you hung up the phone.

Steve had mopped the same spot on the floor five times during his shift, all while sparing fleeting glances towards Waldenbooks, where you were immersed in a magazine or a book. Always doing anything but looking down at him. 

Which was good… maybe? He couldn’t quite decide.

He hadn’t been thinking when he said that on the phone. But he was sleepy, and his brain was a little foggy, and then he’d gone and doubled down. 

As soon as he hung up the phone, he remembered that he had given his real name, and you knew he worked in food service, and you knew he wore a stupid uniform. That narrowed it down really easily. 

So he spent his shift in a constant state of dread and panic, waiting for the other shoe to drop. 

By the time the mall was closing, he had occupied himself with wiping down tables. He let Robin head home and pulled out his Walkman to keep him company. Since working at Starcourt, he made a pretty sick collection of tapes that wound up in the lost and found. This one was a metal mix, which typically wasn’t his thing, but was growing on him. 

He didn’t realize you were standing over him until you rapped twice on the table, drawing his eyes up, up, up until they were locked with yours. He scrambled to pause the tape and stand up, adjusting his stupid uniform as an embarrassed blush grew on his cheeks. 

“Hi,” you greeted. Your Waldenbooks vest hung loosely on your form, right on top of a pink polo. 

“Hi,” he echoed. It was quiet for a second, as he tried to think of what to say, and as you scrambled for the words you’d been practicing all day. “I’ve known it was you for a while.” The words escaped him before he could stop himself, and then he just stared at you, completely mortified. 

You laughed, covering your face for a moment as heat flooded your cheeks. “You knew? I didn’t even— I mean, I didn’t realize. Because I knew it was you calling. For a while, actually. 

He grinned, leaning forward. “So… the guy you said you wanted to… against the shelves…?” When you ducked your head and looked away, he smiled like the cat who got the cream. “No way. You were totally perving on me, even before!”

“You had to walk into a deep freezer to cool off because you were thinking about me, perv.” He laughed, and you wanted to kiss him so badly it freaked you out a little. “So… What do we do now? I mean, now that you know who I am, and I know who you are, and we’re going to keep running into each other.”

Your poor cuticles were going through the wringer— red and stinging where you picked at them due to nerves. There was nothing you wanted more than for him to just sweep you into his arms like some kind of fairytale and promise his undying devotion. Or just say he wanted to date you. Whichever.

“I could take you on a date,” he said sheepishly, scratching at the back of his neck. “I mean, if your type is total pervs who spend most of the week in sailor uniforms.”

Oh, you had plans for that sailor uniform. You stepped forward and planted a kiss on his cheek. “I think you just might be in luck.” He turned his head, just slightly, so he could capture your mouth with his. 

The kiss was sweet, at first. Slow brushes of his lips against yours. They tasted sweet, like he’d been wearing lip smackers or something. Or maybe he’d been sneaking samples of the ice cream. He pulled you closer and you gasped, offering him the perfect opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth. You moaned softly at the feeling of your tongue licking against his. 

He picked you up easily, sitting you down on the table he should’ve been cleaning. Your legs wrapped around his waist, your arms around his neck. It was easy to lose yourself in the hungry, desperate way Steve kissed. You could’ve stayed right there in the middle of Scoops making out with him until the mall opened in the morning, and still not have found the motivation to stop. 

A bright light startled you back into reality, shining directly in your faces. You and Steve squinted in the general direction, as Starcourt security stomped your way. 

“Hey! Get the fuck home,” He shouted, with equal amounts of exasperation and annoyance. He clicked off the flashlight and walked away with a huff and an eye roll, leaving you and Steve alone.

Steve’s cheeks were flushed pink with embarrassment as he stepped back, but he still wore a dopey grin on his lips. You hopped off the table and adjusted your skirt with a light laugh. 

“That was nice,” You said as you tucked a loose curl behind your ear. “I should leave you to it, I guess. Before we both end up in mall jail.” 

He shook his head quickly. “No! I mean, you could hang out here until I’m done. I just have a few more tables to clean and chairs to stack, if you want to—” He trailed off, looking at you expectantly. 

A sly grin spread across your features. “What? Are you trying to go home with me or something?” He stammered nervously, that same, cute blush growing on his cheeks. Before he could say anything, you took a step closer and peered up at him. “Because if you are, I might tell you that my roommate works nights at Hawkins General, and we’d have it conveniently all to ourselves.”

He swallowed, then nodded. “Yeah, that’s what I’m trying to do.”

You sat in the booth nearest to the entrance of the parlor, flipping through a magazine you’d grabbed from work. Occasionally, you’d sneak tiny peeks of Steve bent over a table to wipe it down, uniform stretched tight over his ass, and grin behind the pages. 

He got everything locked up in what he claimed was record time, flashing a smile as he closed up shop behind the two of you.

”Do you work tomorrow?” You asked, as casually as possible as the two of you approached your cars in the employee lot. 

“Yep. Afternoon shift,” he explained.

“I’ll drive you. We’ll carpool tonight.”

The car ride was relatively tame, a few stolen glances at stoplights at most. When you brought him inside the house, your phone was ringing off the hook. You apologized and ushered him into your room, where, true enough, the spare phone you used for the hotline was ringing nonstop. 

“Sorry, let me just…” You grabbed the phone and hung it up once, before taking it off the receiver completely. “There. No interruptions.”

Steve grinned, surveying your room carefully. The set of pom-poms from high school on a shelf, a stack of Cosmopolitan magazines, the chair full of your laundry— fuck, you should’ve definitely taken a moment to speed clean before letting him inside. 

“So… what do you say we pick up where we left off?” You stood on your tiptoes and pecked his lips chastely before guiding him towards your bed. As soon as he sat down, you wasted no time in crawling into his lap and kissing him with all of the pent-up frustration of weeks of phone calls. 

You kissed him for so long you’d have to come up panting for air, before diving right back in. His hands— Jesus, you’d never noticed how big his hands were— were splayed out over your hips at first, but had moved down to grab your ass, encouraging each movement as you rocked against him. 

Without breaking the kiss, you shrugged off your work vest, so it fell into a heap over the side of your bed. He pulled back, chest heaving slightly as he caught his breath. His lips were swollen from use and spit-slick. His eyes moved from the vest on the ground, then back to your eyes. A tiny laugh escaped you before you pulled off your top, then your bra. 

“This still okay?” You asked, as you stood briefly and tugged down your denim skirt. The sound of your voice felt almost foreign in the quiet room, while he took in the sight of you in nothing but a pair of panties.

“God, more than okay,” he assured, before pulling you onto his lap for another heated kiss. This kiss was needier— you could feel it in the hungry way he licked into your mouth, and the feel of him hard beneath you. Tiny gasps pushed past your lips as you rocked against him just right. 

He moved his hands from you only to pull off his work shirt, and the white shirt he wore beneath it. Your hands immediately went to his chest, running through the chest hair he’d hidden beneath the uniform. How the fuck did he manage to walk out of his house without being immediately pounced on by every woman in a five-mile radius?

 He placed one final kiss on your lips before pulling back and meeting your gaze. As earnestly as you’d ever, he asked, “Can I go down on you?”

Yes. Fuck, yes. Oh my god, yes. “Sure, if you want to.”

He smiled wide. “Yeah? Just relax for me, alright?” He shifted the two of you, so you were lying on the bed and he was on top of you. He planted a chaste peck on your nose, and you wrinkled it in reaction. 

You kissed him one, fleetingly, before letting him kiss down your chest and tummy. He parted your thighs and carefully positioned himself between them. You met his gaze and felt your stomach somersault. He leaned in, pressing a kiss to the damp fabric of your panties.,

“Fuck,” he mumbled against you. “You’re soaking for me, huh?” And there was that cocky grin you’d seen at the mall before. You had to lie back and put a hand over your eyes, because if you thought about that fucking smug expression for too long, you’d cum untouched. 

He ran his tongue over the fabric of your panties, tasting you through the saturated satin once, twice before he pulled them down your legs. And he fucking moaned like a man starved at the sight of you. 

Heat burned in your cheeks as you felt him spreading you open, and at the slick, wet sounds of your own arousal. “You’re so pretty.” And then his tongue was on you, lapping up your juices, savoring all of you. 

“O-oh, fuck—“ Your moan came out like a sob as his nose brushed against your clit, making your thighs tremble. He moaned against your cunt, nuzzling deeper like he couldn’t get enough. 

In retrospect, he had brought up how much he loved eating pussy a lot on that first call. Your hips bucked slightly, torn between chasing the feeling and overstimulation. His lips would wrap around your clit and suck softly before he would go back to lapping at you, his tongue parting your folds and teasing your entrance. 

“St-Steve!” You cried out, fingers tangling in his hair. The slightest tug on his locks made him moan against you, which made your toes curl. 

Your moans became pitchy and breathless as he brought you closer and closer to the edge. All of your muscles were wound up tight, itching for release. 

All it took was a little bit of eye contact and you were done for. You sobbed out a moan as he lapped up your release— each lap of his tongue sending electricity up your nerves. When he finally relented, you were shaking with aftershocks and giggling. 

“Something funny?” He asked with a grin as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

You sighed and spared a glance over at him. “I’ve been dreaming of that happening since our first call.” He grinned as you pushed him onto his back and straddled his hips. 

“Did it meet your expectations?” He asked, swallowing nervously as you shifted to accommodate your hand between the two of you. His eyes fluttered shut as your hand slipped beneath his work shorts and boxers to grasp his cock in your hand. 

You gave a slow, experimental stroke of your hand and nodded. “Two thumbs up.”

He swallowed hard as you removed your hand to completely undress him, leaving you both completely naked. You spit into your hand and wrapped it back around his length, holding eye contact as you jerked him off.

There was something so surreal about the entire situation— having him beneath you, warm and pulsing and slick in your hand. Each time your thumb brushed along the head of his cock, he cried out with the prettiest moan.

“W-wait—“ he said quickly, a look of panic in his eyes. You stilled your hand as he looked at you, a pretty blush painting his cheeks. “I’m not gonna last.”

You bit your to keep from grinning like an idiot. “That’s okay,” you said with a smile. You reached into your bedside table and retrieved a condom. “Do you want to, uh, go all the way?” 

He nodded quickly. “Yes. Yes, please.”

You tore open the packet and rolled the condom on. “How’s that feel? Alright?” He gave a dorky thumbs up, which made you laugh. You leaned down to kiss him once more and wondered if you’d ever get tired of that feeling. 

You reached between the two of you and guided his tip through your folds, coating it in your arousal until you grew too needy and lined him up with your entrance. It was a stretch, even though he’d gotten you plenty worked up with his mouth. You sank down slowly, one hand splayed against his chest to keep you steady as you took in inch after inch. 

The sounds that escaped him as you lowered yourself onto him were so pornographic you thought he should be the one working the hotline instead. Desperate panting moans slipped past his full lips as his hands clawed at your hips.

“Fuck,” he moaned, eyes half-lidded as he watched you. “That’s it. You can take it.”

The mouth on him. You moaned softly as you finally settled onto his lap and he was fully sheathed within you. You stayed still, letting your body adjust to and relish in how full you felt. 

“You look so pretty right now,” he said, reaching up to brush a messy hair from your face. You laughed softly as your cheeks warmed, and a funny fluttering in your chest nearly stole your breath.

“Says you,” was all you could manage to say back. You were hyper-aware of the feeling of him within you, of each flutter of your walls around him.

You gave an experimental roll of your hips and his head fell back, against the pillows, exposing the column of his throat. You relished in the way he looked beneath you— debauched and needy. 

It was easy and slow at first. Each time you moved, you would lower yourself back down slowly, letting him savor the feeling of you, warm and wet and needy. He groaned each time you settled back on his lap, eyes hooded with lust as he looked up at you.

You gave a lazy smile as you looked down at him, moaning each time his cock brushed against your sweet spot. “Can I go a little faster?”

He nodded, eager for whatever you could give him. Your nails raked against his chest as you began to ride him in earnest, the back of your thighs slapping against his as you bounced on his cock. 

Your head fell back as you rubbed at your clit with your free hand. Soft moans spilled from your lips as you relished in the culmination of all of your fantasies. Because he was there, splayed out beneath you like a fucking pornstar, and you had him all to yourself. 

His fingers dug into the plush of your hips as he began meeting your thrusts halfway, fucking into the heaven between your thighs. 

Your eyes rolled back as he fucked himself deeper and deeper, stealing your breath with each thrust. “Close,” you practically squeaked out. Red marks stood out against the freckles skin of his chest where you searched desperately for purchase. 

Steve’s hair was stuck to his forehead, tacky from exertion. “Need you to cum for me,” he managed between pretty moans. “Wanna feel you cumming around me.”

You whimpered at his words, riding him harder as your orgasm hit like a tidal wave. A fucked-out moan escaped you as you collapsed against his chest, hips weakly stuttering as Steve continued fucking up into you. With your pussy gripping him like a vise, he could only manage a few good thrusts before he came with a groan. 

You laid there on top of him as you caught your breath, wearing a stupid, giddy smile as he traced mindless shapes onto your back. His face was buried in your neck, where he left sweet, wet kisses. After a while, you slid off of him and sighed, missing the way it felt when he was still buried inside of you. You did your best to clean yourself off with the towel hanging from your bedpost as Steve tied off the condom and tossed it in the bin. 

“We’re not just…” Steve began once you were both comfortable in your bed. He let the words linger for a moment before he shook his head. “Never mind.”

You turned on your side to face him, adjusting your blankets for a bit of modesty. “We’re not just fucking? That’s what you’re asking, right?” He nodded quietly. “It was nice, but no, that’s not all I want.”

He grinned. “Yeah? You wanna be my girlfriend? I totally pulled a cougar.” His stupid grin made you roll your eyes, but you couldn’t keep a matching smile off of yours. 

“You’re so annoying,” you said, not giving him a second to react before your lips were on his again. You pulled back and placed a chaste kiss on his lips. 

In the morning, you woke up in his arms as sunlight crept through the window. You squinted at the sun, then back at him. “Still want me to drive you to work?”

“No way,” he said, muffled against the column of your throat. Soft kisses peppered against your skin, making you giggle and arch into him. “I’m calling in.”