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@dorksndisasters
new enemy i came up with called the "false mimic" this is just some guy that hides in chests and bobs the lid up and down like a mimic breathing. he has 1 hp and if you smack the chest he starts begging for his life snot and tears running down his face
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messed up that you can literally be better and nicer in every way and the adventuring party will still be like "waaa its a shapeshifter waaaa the real whatstheirface would never say that" like ok maybe i am a picture perfect copy of your friend that i imprisoned beneath the earth and replaced when you werent looking. so what. maybe they were a cunt. maybe i thought youd appreciate an improved version of your friend. with awesome eldritch tendrils.
A good way to make evil characters likeable is to give them believably pitiful ambitions. For instance, my drow priestess of Lolth recently rescued a bunch of helpless children for about $20, which might seem like a low-ball offer as far as child rescuing goes, but you don't understand, she just spent her last tenner on a chicken dinner and a beer and she really, really needs about $20 before tomorrow
You have to really embrace the hobo part of being a murder hobo. Say things like "Well, I wouldn't normally, but the ol' pocketbook's gettin a bit light and in my experience rescuing helpless damsels pays at least a little bit better than trappin muskrats"
the dark lord's about to get more got than they've ever gotten got before. and THIS lil buny's gonna get 'em
Baldur's Gate 3 Companion!Tav Ask List
What if your Tav was a recruitable companion, instead of the main character? (contains major spoilers for the game, and for some dark urge runs as well)
General
Where can your Tav be recruited? Are they first encountered on the Nautiloid, or in the Nautiloid crash region? Or are they not recruitable until a later act?
Do the other companions have special comments or reactions upon recruiting your Tav?
Does your Tav have any comments or advice when you recruit other companions?
What sort of general actions raise or lower their approval?
Are there any instances where your Tav can permanently leave the party, depending on player character actions?
Do they have any secrets that can be revealed? What are the prerequisites for this secret coming to light?
Do they have their own personal quest that spans the course of the game? Can it take different branching paths depending on the choices the Player Character makes?
What do they say when the Player Character asks them to stay in camp? How about when the Player Character asks them to come adventuring again?
Does your Tav have any escalating conflicts with one of the other companions, like Lae’zel and Shadowheart’s knife-fight?
Are there any unique NPCs associated with your Tav that can show up during the course of the game?
Are there any moments in the game that trigger unique dialogue for your character? (Like Gale’s anecdote about the barfight after you save the goblin prisoner)
Story Specific
How does your Tav advise the player character when it comes to the Dream Visitor?
How do they advise the player character on Raphael?
How do they react to Astarion biting the Player Character?
How do they react to the Player Character letting Abdirak whip them?
How do they react to the Player Character taking their first tadpole power?
Will they stay with the Player Character regardless of siding with the goblins or the tieflings, or is it possible for them to leave the party permanently?
What can they be found doing at the tiefling/goblin party?
Do they have comments on who the Player Character chooses to spend the night with?
Do they have unique dialogue if the Player Character lets them die when they steal the Blood of Lathander?
How do they react if the PC licks the dead spider in the Gauntlet of Shar?
What do they say if the PC tries to force them to go up on stage with Dribbles the Clown?
Is it possible for your Tav to be kidnapped and replaced by Orin? How is Orin's deception revealed? How do they react to the PC rescuing them in the Temple of Bhaal?
How do they react to the PC either allowing Astarion to ascend or convincing him to spare the 7000 spawn?
How does Tav react to the PC becoming a mind flayer? Can they offer to become one themselves? Does their reaction change if they’re romanced?
How do they react when the Dark Urge first reveals their amnesia and murderous thoughts to them?
How do they react to the Dark Urge killing Alfira?
If romanced, how do they react to the Dark Urge trying to kill them in Act 2?
Romance
Is your Tav a romanceable character? Are there any specific requirements to romancing them?
Does your Tav need to be flirted with to start the romance, or will they approach the PC themselves if approval is high enough?
Are they a polyamorous or a monogamous option?
Do they have a special romance scene at the tiefling/goblin party?
Does the romance have different branching paths, or just one route to take?
How do they react to the player character breaking up with them, or choosing another character over them?
What questions can Zethino ask the PC about Tav in the Love Test?
If they’re poly, do they have a reaction to the PC engaging in a relationship with Halsin?
How do they react if the PC has sex with Mizora? The Emperor? Haarlep?
Will they join in with the PC and the Drow Twins, or no?
What are Tav’s plans for the future? Do they propose to the PC, or is marriage not something they’re interested in?
Free space! Share anything from your companion!Tav au!
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Maybe using a bunch of magic in fiction makes people tired because it burns glucose or something. Your mage needs orange slices
If magic is stored in your body is the new magic that recharges generated by you or is the primordial soup of the universe just slow to trickle back into your cells?
Or maybe your voice just gets tired yelling command words really loud.
Something I’ve been thinking about is that if spells aren’t like an inherent part of reality, like you’ve gotta make up your own spells and use words, then couldn’t you easily counteract a silencing spell by just using sign language?
Like a guy uses silence spell on me thinking he’s stopped me from casting and then I sign out F-I-R-E-B-A-L-L HIT-YOU, IDIOT and then I point my wand and he explodes
"But how can you justify a player character with a (non-disinherited) noble background in a dungeon-crawling fantasy game" well, the most obvious approach is a fantasy setting whose nobility practices cognatic primogeniture where, instead of "first son inherits, second son goes into the military, third son becomes a priest", it's "first son inherits, second son goes into the military, third son becomes an adventurer". From the player's perspective, it handily explains why the title comes with little material support from the family; from the family's perspective, there's an unspoken understanding that most of the spare heirs will be eaten by a dragon (or whatever), thereby simplifying the inheritance situation, and the few survivors will become great assets.
(There is, of course, the possibility that a surviving third son, having grown powerful and understandably harbouring some slight resentment, may return, kill his elder brothers with dark magic, and take over the dynasty, but in practice this almost never happens.)
As an added bonus, if you, the first born son, ever run into -true- trouble, you probably have a few aunts/uncles/second-cousins hanging around who can bring utterly insane amounts of force (political, physical, magical, whichever) down upon it for you.
Very few adventuring-third-children nobles have any desire to take on all the hassle and responsibility of running a noble estate when they finally return home after years of seducing dragons and fighting gods. They just want a nice comfy chair, lots of respect, and all the wine they can drink. And in exchange, they occasionally pull a few fistfuls of gems out of the ol Bag of Infinite Holding, tell stories about that time they cut the head off that giant dragon whole's bones are a mountain range now, and head on down to the Senate Chambers to incinerate whoever's making their sweet nephew so upset these days.
I mean if this isn't an adventurer's retirement dream idk what is
the player’s guide to DM-speak!
“You wouldn’t know”: If you ask to roll, say, history, and your DM responds with this, it usually means, “This is a vital plot point that you aren’t supposed to find out until later, so I won’t tell you regardless of what you roll”
“I mean, you could”: The DM is strongly suggesting you don’t do the thing you were just about to do. But it is your choice… if you reeeeeally want to.
“Oh, fuck”/“Oh, shit”/et cetera: “I DID NOT EXPECT YOU TO MAKE THAT DECISION AND I DID NOT PREPARE AN OUTCOME”
“Oh, fuck”/“Oh, shit”/et cetera: “I JUST REALIZED I DID NOT BALANCE THIS COMBAT CORRECTLY”
“Hang on…”: “Where the FUCK did I put this in my notes?”
“Oh boy”/“Oh god”/“Oh no”/et cetera: I either just rolled REALLY well or REALLY badly. You’ll find out soon enough.
“It seems like…”/“As far as you can tell…”: What I’m about to say your character notices, is nowhere CLOSE to what’s actually going on.
“Make a [skill] check”/“Make a [skill] saving throw”: I’m having you make this roll, but I’m not going to tell you what it means until later, when you’re going to regret it.
A hard, firm, “No”: “Please for the love of GOD and ALL that is holy I am BEGGING you not to put me through whatever BULLSHIT you’re planning.”
Thinking about Paladins...
Thinking about Oath of Devotion Paladins, and how over time they seem less and less like flesh and more and more like stone, as solid as their oaths. How more and more it seems like a light shines from their eyes. How their movement slows as they get older, becoming more and more a thing of stone and light. How they become less a person and more an idea, a promise made flesh. When they die, they become a statue with burning light where their eyes once were. Many take their final rest upon seaside cliffs, acting as an eternal beacon to those in need.
Thinking about Oath of the Ancients Paladins, and how the grass they tread upon might grow a bit greener than it did before. How fruit tastes sweeter when they pluck it. How vegetables and grain grow from the blood and bodies of their slain foes. Life springing from bringers of death. How when they bleed, seeds and pollen might release from their wounds along with the blood. How their skin feels more like bark as they grow older. How their presence feels like peace, like rest. How when they die, the Oak Father takes this warrior into his embrace, and a fruit tree grow over their grave, so they might give once more in death as they did in life.
Thinking about Oath of Vengeance Paladins, and how their mere presence might inspire fear and truth. They barely need to ask questions, one look at those eyes, filled with wrathful calm in equal measure is enough to break almost any who look upon them. How their blood might literally boil when it is spilled, so true is their commitment. How they might weep when they are given the chance to at last be kind. How when they die there is nothing to bury, the fire in their souls fueled by their oath consumes their flesh at last, and then they are nothing but ash.
Thinking about Oathbreakers. How the sun is too bright, and it hurts their eyes. How the night is too dark, and always their vision is off. How their hands always find thorns or sharp edges. How every step they take might be an agony, a reminder of how they committed the truest and most fundamental treason of all. How the very air they breath seems to cut at their lungs as the world itself whispers "wrong thing. wrong thing. traitor" in their ears. Their blood never seeps into the ground, only evaporates. Their body does not even rot. The world itself rejects them.
Thinking about Paladins...
knight who is constantly searching for a good and noble king to serve but cannot fucking find one for the life of him so he has to become the good and noble king himself.
and now all these other knights are coming around like "please let me serve you" and like obviously hes going to let them serve him thats the point of being a good and noble king but its also. very annoying. one of you become the good and noble king for once lets trade
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Way of the Weave Monk v2.2.1 - Jedi Monk subclass now updated!
Some years ago I was inspired to make a fantasy version of the jedi, as a monk order in my world. I recently reworked it into it's 2.0 version (for 5e14 monk) and got a bunch of great feedback.
This is the re-updated version of the homebrew. I have gone through a lot of feedback, rebalanced features, and patched some issues. Includes powers, styles, and ways to use loot or crafting to enhance your lightsaber ki blade!
brainrotting about your dnd character is soooo hard cuz you cant tell anyone else about it since they wont get it, and you cant tell the other players yet cuz their characters dont know these things, and you CANNOT tell your dm because theyre evil and sneaky and Will hurt you (/pos, as much as i pretend otherwise), so youre just STUCK thinking about your character rotating them in your head alllll day
reminder for mages, necromancers, potion makers, and other spell casters:
YOU 👏 CAN 👏 ALWAYS 👏 MAKE 👏 YOUR 👏 WIZARD 👏 HAT 👏 BIGGER 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
it's that time of year when countless people in countless schools and universities start thinking about running a d&d night, and I'm here to tell you: that's the devil talking. listen, I play a lot of games, D&D among them, and I run a LOT of events for college students. what you want is a game with dirt simple mechanics, character creation that can be completed in about a minute or less, and a contingency plan to split your attendees into groups if too many of them show up to reasonably play together. maybe something that doesn't even have dice idk. I'm not being a buzzkill I SWEAR I'm sincerely trying to save you from the horrors of a D&D night where 20 people show up and half of them have level 20 characters packing 16 magic items and a bad case of Main Character Syndrome and the other half are going to need to spend 45 minutes making their first character sheet ever. just play a different game man.
some games that my co-GM and I are planning to run this year:
Dread
Queer Coven
Fiasco
I'm Sorry Did You Say Street Magic
The Quiet Year
Raccoon Sky Pirates
Lasers and Feelings or one of its many hacks
Knave if the students are very good
#like people are looking for the dnd experience not really any of these suggestions#have a bunch of premade archtype stuff ready and do a real dungeon grinder like a youll die before the session is over and someone else wil#get to play you enjoy the snacks or apples to apples afterwards#sorry this tagging is rude
well. people are going to learn that a.) open drop-in nights with an unknown number of attendees aren't the best format for D&D and b.) other games are also fun! assuming they aren't already familiar with and hype for games that aren't d&d, which. you know. a lot of people are. nobody is forcing anyone to play anything they don't want to or stopping them from playing d&d at home in a smaller group :)
A thing to try: don't make gods for your fantasy TTRPG setting.
Instead, get each player to tell you the god their character follows, then roll a d6 behind the screen.
6: Their god is real, and as powerful as they believe it to be; maybe they even listen to prayers; maybe they even care. Maybe they care more about if your shellfish wear mixed fabrics.
5: It's a real entity, but whose power is exaggerated - like as a river spirit, but they're worshipped thousands of miles away from it for prayers their expertise with rivers leaves them woefully unprepared to answer
4: It's a powerful demon or dragon or monster of some kind which has tricked people into worshipping it - sure it's powerful, but that power is entirely self-serving, it couldn't answer your prayers if it wanted to
3: It's a person who, through real power, political influence or just straight up charisma, has tricked people into worshipping them, or through a series of misunderstandings has been mistaken for a god against their will
2: It was a long-dead person whose legacy has passed into legend - they may once have been a 3, or they may just have been famous in their life and not seen as godly until long after their death
1: Just a wholesale myth with no basis in reality. Maybe your god started off as a cautionary tale a mother made up to stop her children sucking their thumbs and over the retellings the whole "god of war" thing just sort of happened because of the massive scissors, and now the scissors are gone and all that's left is battlefield chants.
And of course, let the players know about this before you roll. Tell them about their odds, but never tell them about their gods.
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In Dungeons and Dragons you can do anything.
it's that time of year when countless people in countless schools and universities start thinking about running a d&d night, and I'm here to tell you: that's the devil talking. listen, I play a lot of games, D&D among them, and I run a LOT of events for college students. what you want is a game with dirt simple mechanics, character creation that can be completed in about a minute or less, and a contingency plan to split your attendees into groups if too many of them show up to reasonably play together. maybe something that doesn't even have dice idk. I'm not being a buzzkill I SWEAR I'm sincerely trying to save you from the horrors of a D&D night where 20 people show up and half of them have level 20 characters packing 16 magic items and a bad case of Main Character Syndrome and the other half are going to need to spend 45 minutes making their first character sheet ever. just play a different game man.
some games that my co-GM and I are planning to run this year:
Dread
Queer Coven
Fiasco
I'm Sorry Did You Say Street Magic
The Quiet Year
Raccoon Sky Pirates
Lasers and Feelings or one of its many hacks
Knave if the students are very good
