Dodo Chido Guan

The future is meaningless but the pasta is now.

Mammals both produce milk and have hair. Ergo, a coconut is a mammal.

I know you’re being facetious, but this is an actual issue with morphology-based phylogeny.

*leans over and whispers to person beside me* what are they talking about

*leans over and whispers back*  Human ability to quantify and categorize natural phenomena is sketchy at best and wildly misleading at worst

consider the coconut

this reminds me of that time Plato defined humans as “featherless bipeds” and Diogenes ran in with a plucked chicken screaming “BEHOLD A MAN!”

i love how you say “it reminds me of that time” like you were there.

listen if an immortal feels brave and supported enough to come out we should respect them

This post is a journey

1 Reblog = 1 Respect

I maintain that humans started attempting classify animals, and some god or another made the platypus, and is still laughing.

Athena: You mean venomous, and make sure the eggs have both reptile and bird traits. Hermes: *takes the joint* Give it extra senses. Poseidon: It should be aquatic.

I MEAN where’s the lie

Demeter: … And where exactly do you expect me to put this? Everyone: Australia.

Reblogging for that last exchange.

Dionysus slips in at the last minute and makes it sweat milk.

I asked my boyfriend in Canada once, how he deals with polar bears because I was curious about what to do and he was like, just be calm, let them know you’re there, and give them space and they’ll usually just go away. 

Lmao Finland Man ain’t taking shit from bears.

PERRrrRrrRrKELE

now THIS pic… this one makes me go “oh hell YEAH babey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

This is it, I found it, the funniest post on this entire godsforsaken website

I will never get over how brilliant this comic is. The artist could have just drawn a single image in response, but instead we have this masterpiece. The world doesn’t deserve @iguanamouth.

Genius

i want to run away…but like in ghibli movie. like i take a block of cheese a loaf of bread and some apples and wander through the flower-specked mountains wrapped up in a shawl and i happen to wander into a moving castle and fall in love with a cute wizard

me (deep in the woods, dragging dufflebag of Kraft Singles™  and hopelessly lost): where’s totoro

This is the best one.

*happy cheerful music as fox plays in deserted nuclear radiation land*

This is the aesthetic