Sports Hurts Me

Took you long enough to figure it out idiot

it's so refreshing getting world news that isn't an immediate threat to anyone's life or just otherwise depressing. this is what world news should be. a big ole boat drew a penis and then got stuck in a canal and now a sizable chunk of world trade has ground to a halt. wonderful. this costs me nothing

no more pandemic give me boats stuck in things

iced coffee my beloved

just so you guys are all aware, the only reason gritty exists is allegedly because the NHL made a rule that every team HAD to have a mascot and were apparently assholes about it. so the fliers made him as a chaotic fuck you. hell the first tweet made on his official account was a “sleep with one eye open” threat towards another mascot for making fun of his design

Why is everyone calling Edward Cullen a "Spanish flu survivor"? The boy very much died, don't take pandemic advice from him

me walking into the animal shelter: hi id like the stupidest cat you have

sometimes my cat won’t eat her dinner so i thought i was tricking her into eating by putting a few treats on it but she’s actually tricked me into feeding her treats and i want a stupider cat

you look into this animals eyes and you can tell absolutely nothing is going on in there i am so happy for you

“Long boy bob”

Hope you find someone with some genuine mutual feelings fam

This good karma needs to be passed

I hope you get that job you need

I hope some money comes your way.

I hope that stress you have goes away

I hope you feel good and okay in the morning

I hope you love yourself just because

I hope you wake up tomorrow feeling rested and refreshed

hope you pass any exam you have