It pleases power to see you burdened with shame

stealing a pushie from you and a week later i send you a video of your plushie doing a cross eyed double peace sign and reading off a peace of paper about how it doesn't care about you anymore and loves me

people are saying this is the cruelest post i have ever made

If I had the capacity for emotion rn i feel like i would be infuriated at how obtuse and lengthy the process of getting myself on a new medication regiment is. I felt a small flash of optimism and motivation this morning but trying to find out what caused that would likely end up just shoving me out of the barely survivable rhythm i have going on now that allows me to get up and sit at my desk every day instead of lying in bed sleeping forever.

how am i supposed to know what would be fixed by medication and what would be fixed by just different living conditions if attempting to raise my anti-depressants by 10mg means waiting 2 weeks for a psych appointment, another to be approved by my insurance and then even longer to find a pharmacy that has it. And god forbid if i need to change my stimulants I might as well throw out the idea of doing anything for the next 4-5 weeks

fuck the mouth that bites you

having day bad enough that you're struggling to mask and disassociate at work is so funny. Oh right I think all of you are disgusting and in a just world you would be unworthy to comprise the soil on which i walk