wahoo!

fuck its Already like 100 am

it’s like rock paper scissors: baby oil defeats condom, baby defeats baby oil, condom defeats baby

fuuuuck i forgot to give a shit about stupid bullshit that doesnt matter 🤦‍♀️

having OCD is so funny because I can promise you that any given point I am having a complex and heated inner dialogue with myself, and I am losing.

Your heart is not true enough to enter the gates of Margaritaville

My heart was heavier than the feather; I am sentenced to Rainforest Cafe

your knight's unending loyalty for you is kinda parasocial and lowkey problematic...

fuck i’m trying to catch all these flies but they think my vinegar is stupid. i have honey also but that’s for me i can’t give them any of that

management trying to hire and retain employees

guy currently hurtling toward a migraine at a rate that would impress most astrophysicists: i wonder wgat is happening in my beautiful telephone