Sweet dreams with a lavender sachet

Bi women are kinda expected to just not be with men if they have like. Common sense or something. You see it everywhere. Victim blaming attitudes towards bi women with men from within the bi community usually along the lines of “if she hadn’t been with a man that wouldn’t have happened”

And a recent examoke is the anon I got the other day saying (to what degree of seriousness who knows lol) sleeping with men makes u a class traitor.

So anyways these attitudes can force bi women to choose between community and a relationship that can serve in some cases where the man is abusive to further isolate bi women.

And I’ve seen some people say welll ok if they’re with men then why don’t they go to str8 resources. And it’s like ok. Well for one they aren’t straight that should be enough but let’s go a bit further. Bi women experience unique types of abuse at the intersection of misogyny and biphobia and connected to misconceptions about bisexuals in general. They are also more vulnerable to abuse than straight women because again - they face abuse unique to bi women.

some say the solution is for bi women to just. Not date men. Especially when a bi woman dares criticize or express anger towards men. Which literally isn’t possible for some who for example may live where they can’t be out as a bisexual, where there isn’t much of an lgbt community. And umm sometimes you just fall in love with a man because that’s the whole thing with bisexuality lol.

for example, no you don’t owe anyone anything in that if some creep is trying to get with you, you can block him without feeling bad. you don’t owe kindness to people who are transphobic or racist or bigoted.

but, you can’t use this as an excuse to fuck over people who have helped you. “you don’t owe anyone anything” isn’t an excuse to allow yourself to forget compassion and basic empathy, it isn’t an excuse for you to be an asshole just because you find it easier to be one

relationships aren’t transactional in that if your partner does something nice for you, you are indebted to them. they do these things because they love you; it is their choice to express love through these gestures

but they are transactional in that you both actively need to be putting time and care into the relationship. ignoring the dynamic of one person caring too much (and putting in excessive (emotional an literal) work and labor) while the other does nothing isn’t healthy. one person can’t solely take and the other person can’t solely give- that’s dangerous, and you can’t put the bandaid of “this isn’t transactional” over a relationship that is draining you in all capacities

Fox blep

I just LOVE crystals. My favorite is amethyst, I have an amulet made of it.

Since its my blogs first birthday next week (7/27/2018), I’ve decided to do a giveaway of my in-depth tarot/oracle reading for one person!

You can check out my paid readings post here to see what kind of reading the winner will be able to choose from.

✨Rules

Reblog this post (you can reblog how many times you want)

You must be following me

If you win, give me a feedback on the reading

I’ll choose the winner with my pendulum on the 27th and dm you. If I dont hear from you in 48 hours, I’ll choose another winner✨