hi

sorry for documenting my suffering and delusions online do you still think im hot

gay people will go out in public looking like fucking willy wonka and be too scared to ask the waiter for a refill

in our defense, Willy Wonka also did not leave his factory, possibly because he was too afraid to ask waiters for a refill

My dad is sitting and doodling in a My Little Pony colouring book with my two-year-old kid. He drew a blue sun, and when she coloured over it with her red crayon, he said, “now it’s a red dwarf and it has killed everyone in its solar system.” She nodded solemnly.

tbh if someone just handed me a pressure washer and set me loose in the streets i would go into a trance and just start hosing shit down indiscriminately. it's not a question of how much i could clean, but how long until i get hit by a car and die

i wish i was a leaf instead of a person

if you refuse to get the vaccine the government should sneak into your room after you go to sleep and take out the little chip in your neck that makes the supermarket doors open when you go near them

anyone else feel like they missed the entire month of october. And the entire month of september. and the whole summer. and everything before that. anyone else passively floating through space and time. anyone else feeling like a member of the audience in a movie theater screening their own consciousness who’s just sitting back and eating snacks while everything plays out before them

hand in unlovable hand

want to fall asleep under the stars(no bugs)

jesus did what

Assholes Live Forever