Hi, Welcome To Chili’s

Hit that banite with a bat SMACK

me after smoking half a bowl and drinking one bourbon on a weeknight

me after taking Yak tranquilizers in a berlin warehouse

you need to change your life styles or you might pass away .

Imagine you’re 400 kilometres above the ground, hurtling along at eight kilometres per second, you get a short break from your strict work schedule to call up your wife who you haven’t seen for months, and she hangs up on you.

“actually op was lying for notes SO” so what? do you think i come to tumblr, a casual blogging website on the internet, to listen to board tested & reviewed personal stories? do you think I sit there patiently, tapping a merry little tune, as the op gets cross-examined by the tumblr jury to ensure they aren’t lying under oath? do you think your blorbos and bleebees will be tarnished if they exist on the same dash as a tall tale?

scantily clad is such a good phrase. i want to be clad. scantily

I love going viral on tumblr.com. It’s like if you stood in a field and said some of the stupidest shit a human being is capable of and then like fifty thousand crows attacked you