Dexter's blog

For a very long time, I really thought of motivation as something intensely personal. It seemed like an inner force – something I actually had to manufacture within myself so I’d remain focused, productive, and consistent. I really believed that if I could just fortify my own self-control and mental attitude, all else would just fall into line itself. And although this method worked quite well to some extent, I really started to see something significant when I began working much closer with others: my motivation wasn’t isolated at all. It got influenced rather a lot by the folks around me, the setting I was in, and the energy of the group.

That realization totally transformed how I approached motivation. I observed that in teamwork environments, motivation really becomes something we share. It’s not all about individual exertion – it’s about how people affect one another, give each other support, and move towards a common goal together. I’ve actually experienced times where being part of a highly motivated team really improved my own execution far beyond what I ever thought possible. At the exact same time, I’ve also witnessed just how a deficiency of motivation within a group really slows everything way down.

Understanding just how to spark and sustain motivation in a team really became one of the most precious skills I developed, since collective success is based not simply on individual effort, but on how well the group performs as a cohesive unit itself.

For quite some time now, I really underestimated just how significant a part laughter played in my life itself. I would see it as a very casual thing, something that happened during times of entertainment, social gatherings or everyday chatter. It didn’t seem like something tied to the personal development or a self-improvement itself. I was way more focused on self-control, being productive and setting serious goals. In my mind, improving myself required hard work, strict schedules, and a lot of concentration.

Laughter seemed like a nice break from that – not something that would actually help with it. But over time, I really began noticing something quite interesting indeed: the moments when I laughed much more were also the moments when I really felt more carefree, more inspired, and more genuinely connected to other people.

As I looked closer, I eventually realized that laughter wasn’t all just a simple reaction – it was actually a helpful tool. It had the power to totally change my outlook, lower my stress, and adjust my thinking in ways that nothing else ever could. When I finally began to really make an effort to put humor into my life, I really noticed improvements not only in my emotional state but also in how I managed obstacles.

My problems didn’t feel so out of control, my conversations became much more natural, and even quite difficult situations really became easier to handle. Laughter didn’t replace hard work or self-control, but it really enhanced them a lot. It added balance to my life, reminding me that growth doesn’t always have to be super tough – it can also be quite light, adaptable, and even really fun itself.

For a very long time, I really considered physical exercise as somewhat separate from motivation itself. I basically looked at it mainly in terms of physical health – keeping fit, keeping energy up, or even improving my appearance. Although those benefits were quite real, I didn’t initially see the connection between exercise and both mental toughness and motivation. As a matter of fact, there were times when I really struggled to stay consistent since I viewed it as something I just had to do instead of something that would actually help me feel a lot better and think more clearly. It quite often felt like an obligation more so than a tool for growth itself.

Over time, however, my perspective really started to change. I began noticing exactly how I felt after just a short workout. My mind seemed clearer, my energy levels definitely improved, and I had a much stronger sense of focus all the time. Very slowly, I realized that movement wasn’t just doing more for my physical state – it was actually affecting my motivation directly.

Exercise really became a method to reset my mindset, beat out my mental resistance, and build much more consistency. Rather than counting mainly on willpower alone, I started using physical activity as a natural way to generate motivation. That shift really made a huge difference, not just in my fitness routine itself but also in how I attacked challenges every day in life itself.

For quite a while now, I’d really considered personal development as a very personal affair indeed. I concentrated on enhancing my behaviors, building my willpower, making plans, and working towards my personal achievements. All of which were really valuable – yet something always seemed somewhat short of complete. Regardless of all the progress I made on my own, there were times when the satisfaction just didn’t last quite as long as I really anticipated. It felt like something was missing – something beyond personal achievement. That’s when I started exploring the idea of altruism, not as some major act of selflessness, but as a rather simple and consistent habit of helping others.

At first, I didn’t really expect much from it myself. I reckoned helping others would be quite beneficial, yet I really hadn’t realized how deeply it would affect my attitude. The more often I was involved in doing little deeds of kindness – offering aid, listening more closely, or just really being present – the more I observed a change in how I truly felt.

There was a feeling of fulfillment that was distinct from my personal successes. It felt a lot more long-lasting, a lot more meaningful. I started to really grasp that altruism isn’t merely about helping out others – it’s also about redefining the way we really see both ourselves and our world. Helping others really did become an extremely important part of my self-improvement process itself.

For quite a while, I really didn’t grasp the degree to which my mindset was impacting my results. I used to think success basically relied on external factors – opportunities, good fortune, or just the right timing. When something didn’t quite work out I very often blamed circumstances or assumed I just weren’t talented enough.

Looking back I could really see that this way of thinking quietly shaped all my actions. I kind of held back from taking risks sidestepped challenges, and often gave up too early. It wasn’t that I was lacking ability – it was that I lacked faith. Without even realizing it, I had created a mindset that severely limited my potential – before I really ever gave myself a chance to try.

Everything started changing when I started exploring the concept of a “can-do” attitude. At first it seemed a bit simplistic almost like something you’d hear in an inspirational quote. Yet the more I thought about it the more I really got its depth. A “can-do” attitude isn’t about faking it and making every challenge seem effortless or totally ignoring problems. It’s about believing you can find your way forward – even when things seem really uncertain. It’s about approaching obstacles with curiosity rather than fear – and choosing to act despite uncertainty.

As I started shifting my mindset, I really noticed changes – both in my self-assurance and in my readiness to take action. That shift really became the base of my personal growth.

I did not grasp the concept of self-esteem for quite a while. I saw it as an innate thing that some individuals had while others didn’t; not something that could be improved. In my analysis, individuals who were full of confidence seemed to have an inner conviction about their selves, while those who wavered were seen as being less than certain of themselves. Nonetheless, reflecting deeply on my life events gave me a sense that self-esteem is not a static entity— it can be constructed, molded, and made stronger as time goes by. Self-esteem is closely associated with what we perceive about ourselves, what we interpret from our experiences and how we react to challenging situations.

At times I had doubts concerning my capabilities and worthiness and used to compare myself with other individuals. These thoughts of mine posed a challenge to taking any risks or pursuing favorable opportunities. Nevertheless, I started discovering that self-esteem is not about perfection or self-confidence all the time— it’s about realizing your worth without depending on external recognition. It’s a comprehension that one’s value is not subject to continuous success or appreciation from others. As I started focusing on building my self-esteem deliberately I observed an alteration not just in my attitude towards myself but also in my approach to life. The development of a self-esteem became one of the key components of my growth experience.

I really thought motivation came from those external goals – success, recognition, financial security, or personal achievements for a very long time. I’d set some targets, push myself really hard to get them, and feel a temporary sense of accomplishment whenever I succeeded. However over time, I noticed quite a thing: that feeling never lasted for long. No matter how many objectives I accomplished, there would always be another one right there waiting, and eventually, the motivation that had driven me all along would really start to wane. I actually began questioning if I was missing out on something rather deeper – something far more meaningful than simply pursuing results.

That’s when I started looking into the concept of spirituality. Not in a very strict religious sense, but rather as a sense of connection to something greater than myself – a much deeper reason, a sense of purpose, or even an inner awareness that went way beyond daily annoyances. When I finally took the time to really think about it, I realized spirituality isn’t really about getting away from reality itself.

It’s actually about understanding it a lot better. It really gave me a whole new view on motivation. Rather than relying entirely on external goals, I started linking my actions to a sense of purpose itself. That subtle change completely transformed everything. Motivation really became less about force and more about being aligned – aligned with values, with meaning, and with a much deeper comprehension of why I do what I do.

I used to view nutrition very simply for a long period. My assumption was that a good diet was mainly about keeping one physically healthy– having sufficient energy, being in good shape, and avoiding diseases. It did not cross my mind that nutrition does not only affect the body but also has deep effects on the mind like many individuals.

I used to focus more on ease over quality most of the times. Convenience foods, quick processed meals, and irregular feeding schedule were part of my usual routine. Back then, I was not aware of the long-term consequences of it. But over time, I started feeling tired most of the times, not focused, and at some point emotionally low with no apparent reasons behind it.

It was my realization that food is not just the source of energy– rather information to the body and brain. The nutrients consumed have an impact on our way of thinking, feelings and performance. Once I started observing the types of food I consumed and its effects on my emotions and energy levels, I see evident connections. I realized that there were particular kinds of food that gave me high energy and concentration while others resulted in tiredness or lack of focus. Understanding this relationship made me look at myself differently. Nutrition became beyond just a health practice– it became an effective tool to enhance one’s thinking power, emotional stability, and general state of being well.

It took some time before I understood that motivation stems from achievement of targets. To me, being motivated was about one moment only, which I could get through if only I completed a task, achieved some cash or an important objective. My belief was that motivation would be received when reaching milestones only. And I put in effort, continued moving forward and kept concentrated at the finishing line. But a weird thing is that I felt gratified for some time after completing every target set for me.

After a short span of satisfaction, I saw my concentration to move onto next milestone resume, beginning another cycle of mine. I realized that if motivation had no other source than outcome alone, then this source appears to be unstable and transitory in nature.

On realizing that my view about motivation was wrong, the way I viewed personal development also got affected. I let go of thinking about just the end goal and began noticing what lay between them. I pondered over whether the activities along the way were enjoyable for me. Once I developed the habit of appreciating the minor steps that I undertook each day, the understanding gained from my minor improvements and little knowledge acquired throughout the stages of my progress helped make my motivation steadier.

The process no longer appeared to be a difficult requirement to fulfill but turned out to be some worthwhile purpose within itself. In fact, finding pleasure in the journey changed my attitude towards objectives, progress and my long-term self-motivation.

I spent many years not realizing how disconnected I was from nature itself. The days are so filled up with screens, our agendas, our deadlines, and constant notifications. I wake up inside, work inside, and rest indoors. And even during my short breaks most of which involved either staring at my phone or watching video on-line. I then started feeling mentally exhausted in a way that sleep alone could no longer cure. It was as if my head was overfilled, lacking concentration, and very low on motivation. Initially I thought that is probably part of today’s world life, something each person faces when trying to be productive and having self-improvement.

To my surprise, everything drastically changed upon taking out time to go out into the environment. The easy act of walking through a park, going for trekking along trails, relaxing by waters, or even taking short step outside for fresh air had a powerful positive impact on my disposition and clarity. I didn’t just unwind in nature, but also managed to have reconnection with some deeper balance and perspective.

In time I got to understand reconnecting with nature was not merely hobby but integral component in individual development process. Nature offered room for contemplation, renewed my strength, and told me growth doesn’t depend on non-stop moving around. Sometimes one needs to take slow pace to reconnect ourselves with the world surrounding us.

For a long time, I thought that motivation was something that was always available when I was inspired enough. I would wait for the ideal frame of mind and high levels of energy as well as for the most appropriate moment before setting out to work towards the realization of my objectives. In some cases it did occur- I felt elated and very productive. However there were times when motivation was nowhere to be seen and so my intentions would come to a stop. This cycle of being inspired but then inactive became tiring. It hit home that relying solely on motivation was not reliable. Relying on it more often made my progress become less steady and less consistent.

In the end I discovered something that entirely transformed how I saw myself growing and developing: routine. Rather than waiting for motivation to strike, I started thinking about establishing a few consistent habits into my daily schedule. Initially it felt like going through motions, almost dull as opposed to the thrill of those impromptu moments of motivation. Nevertheless with time I witnessed this extraordinary thing. The more consistent my routine turned out to be, the more naturally motivation followed. Instead of expecting inspiration, I was able to make an environment in which motivation developed. Routine did not restrict my creativity or freedom; rather it offered me the order required for moving steadily ahead.

I under-appreciated sleep’s value for quite some time. As individuals aiming at improvement we all think being productive is about using every waking moment productively. I would often remain up late in a bid to achieve certain objectives; whether through reading, planning for tomorrow, or setting out some plans, it was such a belief that losing sleep was going to mean success. Initially, it even felt right, like I was really producing something extra.

I could just point to the additional hours and say to myself that I am in good position. But over some time, I started noticing disturbing trends: although I had put in longer working hours, my concentration kept on weakening, my drive lowered down, and not being able to make sensible decisions clearly. It was true: I wanted to enhance my performance but I was secretly undermining the basis on which performance was achievable.

Afterward, I came to appreciate that sleep is not some time lost. Actually, it may be perhaps one of the best tools towards personal progress and having high output. Restorations of the brain can be achieved during sleep while also repairing physical damage, improving one’s memory and readjusting one’s emotional equilibrium.

When I started taking into consideration sleep as an important element of my own growth process rather than being an obstacle, everything got a complete makeover. It is true that my productivity enhanced, my imagination grew greater, and staying determined for the whole day was much more consistent. Upon understanding the function played by sleep in achieving top performance it definitely gave me new perspectives in dealing with duties and life overall.

For a really long time, I thought motivation was just something I either had or didn’t have. On good days, I got kind of driven and energized; on bad days, I felt drained and kinda unfocused. What I didn’t get was how much of my motivation was getting quietly sucked into stuff I didn’t question— like being available all the time, trying to please people, taking on too much work, and not being able to say no. I figured being helpful, being flexible, and always available was actually a good thing.

But really, it started draining my energy. I basically gave my attention away way too easily, so there was almost nothing left for me, my growth, or even my well-being. When motivation just disappeared, I got mad at myself instead of thinking about how my energy was pretty wide open.

It wasn’t till I started getting some ideas about boundaries that things started making sense. Setting boundaries wasn’t just about pushing people away or getting a bit selfish– it was actually about keeping an eye on your mental and emotional energy if you want to stay motivated. I realized motivation doesn’t just happen out of thin air. It needs some space, some clarity, and maybe even feeling safe to get going.

When I actually started setting boundaries – inside my head and also with others- I saw a big change. I got more focused, stopped getting resentful, and suddenly I could try to motivate myself over time. Watching my energy became like one of the biggest self-motivation jobs I ever got working on.

Getting patience worked okay for most of my life— it just seemed like something I didn’t really have. I respected people who seemed naturally pretty chill– they didn’t get all tensed up if plans changed or waiting for results took a bit longer than expected. Meanwhile, I mostly lived with this sense of having to rush, like like time was just getting away from me. Every little delay got personal. Even every slow moment felt like wasting my chance.

Getting older and trying to live in a fast-paced, kinda hyper-connected world just made me think patience wasn’t just waiting passively, being weak, or checking out— it’s actually some kind of inner work. Getting patient didn’t mean giving up on my goals or dropping expectations; it meant getting good at staying emotionally steady while actually working towards them.

When I started actually practicing patience, my whole thing with time totally changed. I got less reactive, more grounded, and way more ready when stuff didn’t go as planned. I saw I made better choices, got my communication right, and started feeling less overwhelmed by not knowing what’s going on. Having patience didn’t slow me down– it actually helped me do a better job. Instead of just rushing through life, I learned how to move with some intention and get calm, even when the world around me seems kind of crazy.

For a pretty long time, I got it wrong thinking about how much my inner conversations were actually shaping up my life. I just thought motivation came from outside stuff— getting disciplined, getting pressure, meeting deadlines, maybe getting some ideas from reading books and watching videos. What I really started realizing was that under every move I made (or tried not to make) was a kinda quiet, steady stream of thoughts helping me get my act together. Those thoughts weren’t usually very encouraging self-talk. They were kind of critical, dismissive, and sometimes really tough.

I talked to myself in ways I wouldn’t normally talk to a friend— calling myself lazy if I struggled, feeling weak when I got tired, and getting anxious when things seemed stuck. After a while, this inner negativity just kind of sucked away my motivation. Even when chances looked good, my inner voice figured out ways to talk me out of giving it a shot. Really, the big challenge wasn’t that I thought I couldn’t do it– it was the way I talked to myself.

Things actually shifted up for me when I got it: motivation isn’t just about putting in effort- it’s about actually getting along with my own brain. Having positive thoughts about myself isn’t just telling myself lies or pretending everything is okay. It’s actually choosing words that help me grow instead of just getting scared. As I got a bit wiser to my inner chat, I saw just how much it actually got into my energy, my confidence, and getting back at it.

When I worked on what I say to myself, I didn’t suddenly get perfect or stop being scared— but I did start to get willing. Getting willing to try, to get better and to stick with it even when things feel rough. That change actually got my motivation working a lot better than any old plan from outside ever could.

Getting into good decision-making, I used to think it was something you just get or maybe don’t get it. I watched out for confident people getting through life with what seemed easy, making choices fast and sticking by them without much hesitation. Meanwhile, I kinda doubted myself all the time. Every decision felt heavy, serious, and kind of full of potential regrets.

I overthought little choices and put off big ones thinking that maybe taking a bad step would mess up everything I’d gotten ready for. That fear really didn’t just hold me back– it actually helped shape my whole identity. I started thinking of myself as indecisive, careful, and maybe unsure, but not really getting that being indecisive itself became one of my biggest habits.

What I finally got is that making decisions isn’t really about being smart, getting lucky, or showing your personality— it’s more about staying aware. It’s a thing that can be learned, practiced and even improved over time. When I actually started watching how I make decisions rather than judging myself for the results, things started to shift. I stopped waiting for perfect answers and started trying to get aligned, have some intentions, and take responsibility. Making good choices didn’t mean getting it all right; it meant getting it thoughtfully. Realizing this stuff changed how I deal with not just decisions, but also my attitude towards fear, getting confident, and working on myself.

I used to think motivation had to come from within. The way I was raised emphasized independence so much that needing help was viewed almost as if you were weak or unsure. Thus, whenever I felt stuck or unmotivated, rather than say there was a problem I’d just push harder— read more books for instance, set stricter goals, or force productivity through sheer discipline. Sometimes these tactics worked temporarily; however eventually I would encounter the very same obstacle again left feeling drained confused as to whether my efforts were even worthwhile.

Everything changed when I experienced real mentorship for the first time. Having someone more experienced listen challenge and encourage me didn’t just offer advice— it provided perspective and momentum. I realized motivation doesn’t always stem from willpower; occasionally it’s ignited by seeing oneself mirrored in another individual’s journey. Mentorship demonstrated growth is not an isolated journey. Rather this process occurs collectively having bonds insights as well as guidance.