GO, ONION.

BUT I REALLY, REALLY LOVE HIM. I REAAAAAALLLLLLY LOVE HIM.

I keep finding myself accidentally thinking something along the lines of like, "Damn, it's cool how Toby Fox finally has one of these badass omnipotent-type boss characters that literally isn't even sexy at all, like not in the slightest, just absolutely not dripping sex appeal in literally any direction, completely bone dry of sex juice, that's really progressive of him."

Then I remember that Spamton is not actually considered conventionally attractive, and that I am actually just diseased.

But the confluence of personality and design being invoked here is quite obviously not coincidental. It is not a mistake that Flowery is an uncomplicated conventionally attractive semi-human man. He… really honestly resembles what a Flowey humanization may have looked like, in some highly specific alternate universe? (He REALLY reminds me of that one post about what a humanized Mettaton might've looked like, if Mettaton EX didn't exist.) It's kind of genius.

(I mean, it's hard to say that Flowery is conventionally attractive, just by virtue of being fucking stupid and jaundiced, but… Sexy anime guys do actually profit millions in gacha dollars every year. And not Spamtons, generally. It's just that nobody who is a very big fan of Deltarune seems to have a conventional sexuality at all?)

Fox is historically a fan of poking fun at "bishounen"-type characters—and I'm strangely glad to see a character both embracing and examining the basal elements of these tropes from him. It feels loving. Sure, it contains semi-irony along the lines of the bulk of his creative output—though I've always found Fox's approach to irony not as being antithetical to sincerity, but as a means of highlighting the earnest joy contained in whatever he's poking fun at. You're free to find that detachment a bit annoying, but this is not new for him. Flowery is beautiful, and perfect, and completely fucking obnoxious. He's a really good character.

Moreover, I'm just so glad that this game finally has "yaoi".

And it's a really beautiful yaoi.

Anyway, I've been, like... tepidly entertaining the idea of writing some sort of Flowery x Reader fanfiction—despite experiencing approximately negative attraction to him? I just, like. I want to put something beautiful into the lives of the kind of people who are earnestly attracted to him. That's the way I feel. If there are ANY of you out there, HIT ME UP. I WILL FUCKING WRITE FOR YOU.

(On that note: while I do earnestly enjoy writing x Reader bullshit—probably more than I should—most of the time, it's just immensely difficult to contrive a scenario where it makes sense. Like, how the fuck does a Tenna x Reader fanfiction work? Am I just walking into Kris's house and sexing up their TV?! WHY AM I DOING THAT?!?!) ("But what if the Reader is a Darkner?" you say. And to that I say: the role of the "Reader" is so much more Lightner aligned, narratively, that I cannot stand to see it hierarchically misplaced for any reason.) (Also I don't want to be a fucking pair of dice in Kris's pantry.)

Anyway, yeah. Love that flower guy. Do NOT want to fuck him. In the slightest.

That's all I have to say for now. I guess. I kind of failed to cohere any actual useful thoughts or analysis in this post. Sorry. Can we talk more about Flowery? Can we all talk about Flowery and nothing else for like at least two calendar months? Can we talk about his radiant, doe-like eyes?

The security was chill and ppl thought my posters were cool. Will post more later on!