DESTROYING STRONGHOLDS

The past couple days I've been pondering the idea that with God's grace you can abound in every good work. The verse doesn't say that the work is going to be easy or that it is going to LOOK good. Every work day I've gotten a tiny sign that I'm supposed to stay there for at least that day. Tomorrow might be different, but I'm supposed to be there for at least that minute. Sunday was really really hard. I was hanging on for dear life, lost my grip on my individual job multiple times, and needed help from the others to recover. A few times I looked at the many tickets and said "I'm completely lost", and they said "it's ok." I thought my work looked really ugly. At the end of the day, my manager said "I think you did a really good job today. You kept up really well." I guess to her it looked like I abounded. Then she told me her dad was just diagnosed with leukemia and is going to die. She left before I could do any grand preaching. I guess at least for this coming Friday I'm there to abound in good work, even if to me the work looks ugly.

I started thinking about the fears in my heart, and I realized they are strange types of idols. My worship of them doesn't look like traditional worship. Instead I am terrified of them. They rule my heart none the less. They remove the Father from his throne in my heart and become the gods of my heart. I fear them as gods that rule my life. I am scared of screwing up at my job and bringing the wrath of my job down upon my head to the point I fear my job has the power to destroy my life. My job brings me no comfort, even though it supplies me with money. It is a simple job. I am a cook at a breakfast restaurant. The tasks are repetitive, but they have to be performed very quickly, and the tasks are many. I am so afraid of the customers and of my company owner, I freeze and cannot perform my tasks. My fears themselves overcome me and could potentially loose me my job. If it wasn't this job, I would be afraid of something else, and that fear would rule in my heart just as much as this job does. Lord take back your throne in my heart. Remove the idols from my heart. Create in me a clean heart of God, and renew a right spirit within me. (Psalm 51:10). Bring your Psalms to my mind every time I start to worship what i see as power in my idols. Prince of Peace, let me know your are with me. Father, speak to me in a gentle whisper telling me you are right next to me. Holy Spirit, fill me with your power and love, give me a sound mind. (2 Timothy 1:7). Replace the thoughts in my head with constant thoughts of you. Help me to think on whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, and excellent. (Philippians 4:8.) Replace my vision of myself as a failure with what you say about me-- that I am your daughter. Open my eyes and let me see your words as lovely. In Jesus name, a men.