go home

the oldest reblogs for this post that i can find are from january 2nd of 2013. this can has been getting kicked around tumblr for almost 13½ years now

going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

Blue Lois

can i help you

Red Marge

jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack

[walks out of the movie theater soaked head to toe in blood] holy shit guys

brought nothing to the gun fight. whatever man

LGBT = Lets Go Buy Tix for the MOVIESSSSSSS

i love that star wars comic where padmé's surviving handmaidens hold a last stand against vader but honestly if i were them i would have dedicated the rest of my life to the most comprehensive and inescapable fake haunting in the history of the galaxy. man should not be allowed two successive heartbeats without seeing his dead wife's face gazing soulfully at him across the room and slipping away before anyone sees. literally what else is the point of being a highly trained operative capable of perfectly imitating your best friend if not to torment her husband for decades after she's gone.

if you vote me for president i vow to make everything the ocean again. no more land only ocean. this will solve all of our problems and replace them with new, far more interesting problems

Happy pride month to the tiny cowboy and tiny Trojan man from Night at the Museum

happy pride month 2021 I ain’t quittin’ you…