Hello!

Unrestrained summer fun

You are the dancing queen, young and sweet, now in quarantine

You can dance, you can jive, but you can’t go outside

OOOOOOOHHH see that girl, watch that scene, but through your window screen

For everyone complaining about how these two can get arrested and it won’t affect their careers, you’re right. It most likely won’t hurt their careers. That’s why they keep going out and doing it. They’re using their platform to their advantage. They’re both white, of an older generation, and famous enough to be recognized. They’re holding their generation accountable and making an effort to show up and enforce change. This isn’t them advertising a TV show or some bs, they’re there to help

Imagine being so fucking stupid that you don’t understand that is the literal point.

I also love that Ted Danson looks like he’s in character as Michael from The Good place, truly delighted to experience the human event of getting arrested.

there’s honestly nothing worse than an apple that’s not crisp like don’t come near me with that grainy soft shit, that weak ass crunch i’d rather die

this is an anti-red delicious apple blog and if you don’t agree you can block me right now

op change ur url

I shall hunt you for sport

most stories about supernatural entities working with humans portray the supernatural entity as either a stuffy asshole with a superiority complex, or a clumsy idiot whose lack of familiarity with human culture and utilities is played for laughs, or a combination of the two, but what i really want to see for once is a simple buddy/family comedy dynamic. that’s all.

i dont understand this at all and america scares the fuck out of me

This is the america they don’t want you to see

i love america

This is what you call Waffle House at 2 am when the bars close and everyone is drunk and hungry

*group of people having fun* this site: wtf this is so scary

People having safe fun at a waffle house is scary for most Tumblr bloggers, reports say.

We’re not even gonna mention FEMA’s Waffle House Index where they determine how bad a natural disaster is by calling the local Waffle House to see if they’re open?

that last bit isn’t a joke

free soup

you’re going to be so, so cursed.

free soup

“Hey friend sorry I’m late, I reincarnated in a part of the world I’m not familiar with so it took me a while to find you again”

I’m glad I wasn’t the only one who thought that.

Fuck people like this. Don’t undercharge.

He’s so great

why does this sound like a mcelroy bit

I was high off my ass last night and had this dream where I was in this dense ass forest and sitting there was a tall woman. She was so tall I couldn’t see her face but she was wearing gold and I was like “uh...hi?” And she said “I made you, do you know that?” And I nodded and she was like “I hear your thoughts. Why do you hate my creation? Why do you try to destroy yourself? I made you perfect as you are. Please don’t break my heart”. Then she started crying and it flooded and I woke up with fucking heart palpitations like what does it Mean™️????

cant believe we’ll never know who ended homophobia because he was anon

don’t hide shit like this in the tags y'all, it robs us of hilarity

*slams fists on table* THIS IS THE CONTENT I’M HERE FOR