I Like That

I asked my five year old cousin what he would do if there was a scary skeleton and he said "I would pour water on it and then kick it" and I've been losing my shit laughing crying about a wet skeleton for about fifteen minutes straight

one of my favorite bits in lord of the rings is something the movies didn't really try to do because it's entirely internal, but sam's carrying the ring and it starts trying to do its work on him, so he's having these intrusive visions of himself marching at the head of a vast and terrible army, and he just starts laughing because, me? samwise gamgee? sam gamgee the general sam gamgee the dark lord are you for real? man i just want to go home and do some gardening. and the ring gets frustrated and it starts trying to figure out other stuff that would actually tempt sam and it's finally like, okay, but hear me out: imagine if you could have...A REALLY REALLY BIG GARDEN

isn't it kind of crazy that for any moving vehicle you need to wear a seatbelt but then on buses they're just like fuck it stand up whatever

everything going downhill but at least there’s still phone in bed time am I right.. ahah am I right

Decided to do a Warehouse 13 re-watch for the hell of it... and I'm laughing at the scene where Pete is shocked and excited by a farnsworth's "two way video communication". Like I know this was made pre-smartphones but I don't think it was made pre-Skype? Sure it's impressive that it's in so small a package at that time, and impressive that it was apparently invented right after television, but c'mon man. It's not a huge jump. Or maybe it just feels silly to me because in less than ten years or so two-way video communication becomes so normal and widespread.

basketball players fight over the basketball because they are hypnotized before each game to believe it is their egg

I don't think this is true, but I will wait for a ruling by the sacred boar that lives in the center of the earth

sometimes i have strong opinions but they're also so inane that halfway through writing a post i'll be like "yeah, this is Absolutely not worth the energy it's taking" and delete everything. but then the opinion is still in my head. and i still want to share it. so within five minutes i go "you know, i bet i can phrase it more succinctly this time" and anyway. you all see where this is going. sometimes i do this four times in a row before i give up on the specific inane opinion and instead write a vague post about the concept of opinions as if that'll satisfy the urge to post the entirety of my inner monologue online. may or may not be relevant to what you're reading right now. and now all our lives have been enriched. you're welcome

My friend really changed once she became a vegetarian 

its like ive never seen herbivore

i sighed so loud my mom asked me if i was okay and she’s two rooms away